I felt like a dream.

I had not been with a woman so passionately in a long, long time.

Long after she fell asleep against my chest, I laid awake, gazing at her. I watched the rise and fall of her chest as she breathed, her small, delicate breasts puffing in and out in response.

Her thin, bare ribs sent a cold chill down my back. The way her pale skin pulled at her bones seemed as if she were a mere skeleton, breathing its last breath.

I wanted to take her in my arms and hold her tightly against me, but I did not want to wake her. Instead I found myself combing my fingers through her soft, dark hair.

With my other hand, I reached over us and took the blanket, pulling it up to her shoulders. She sighed softly through her nose but did not wake.

I watched her eyelids, the way her eyes rolled and shuddered beneath them, and I wondered if she could hear my heart-beat, if she could hear how deeply I had fallen for her.

...

That morning I woke up and she was not beside me.

My eyes flicked to the dresser, and I saw her music box was gone. I leapt quickly out of bed and marched through my bedroom, but then I stumbled against something. I looked down and saw her black shoulder bag laying in the floor.

My fingers reached for it with temptation, longing to see what she had in there. But I just picked it up and placed it on the dresser, then left the bedroom.

"Nina?"

I wandered into the living room, but she was not there. I made my way to the kitchen, but didn't find her. I checked the front door, and saw it was still locked. She couldn't have left unless she took the keys with her, I realized.

My feet carried me back to the bedroom, and I went straight into the master bathroom.

My medicine cabinet was open. A bottle of pills on the counter. A glass of water sitting in the sink.

Ice twisted its way into my stomach.

"Nina," I whispered hoarcely, rushing to the bathtub and jerking back the curtain. Nothing in there but soap scum.

"Nina!" I yelled desperately, my heart threatening to gag me.

Suddenly, faintly, I heard a toilet flush.

I sprinted out of the bathroom, through my bedroom and down the hall to the second bathroom. My hands reached for the doorknob but I stopped short when it turned on its own.

Nina walked out, nearly bumping into me.

"Oh, sorry," she blushed, ducking her head shyly.

When I grabbed her my hands were shaking. I wrapped my arms around her and held her, and my emotions cracked loose of their control. I began to weep, my body shaking all over as I held her against me, hot tears running down my face.

"Thomas," she said softly, her voice confused. Yet she graciously hugged me back.

"My darling, Nina," I whispered when my sobbing abated.

I slid down to my knees in front of her, and fear flashed through her eyes. I held her gently, my hands resting on her hips. I gazed up into her dark, wet eyes.

"I love you."

That fear returned to her eyes when my words struck her eardrums. She slid backwards out of my hands and leaned against the wall.

I reached for her hand, but she raised it to her chest so I could not reach, her eyes narrow with suspicion and distrust.

Dejected, I got to my feet.

"That's what you told Beth, isn't it?" She asked bitterly.

"Beth is dead, Nina," I retorted bluntly.

She stiffened and her eyes searched by face, widening as she found it to be true. Her face paled dramatically.

"How?"

"Her surgery didn't go as planned," I muttered.

"Oh..."

Her tone was off. I raised my eyes at her and saw a perplexed look of relief wash over her face. Something in her expression made me angry. Why would she be relieved to know Beth's surgery went wrong? I shrugged it away as best as I could.

"It doesn't matter what I told Beth, because whatever I told her it was to keep her happy. I never lov-" My voice broke as I tried to lie. I forced myself to swallow the dry lump in my throat. "I never loved Beth," I finished weakly.

She stared at me for a moment before accepting my lie as truth.

"I love you," I added, stepping towards her.

She smiled sadly and allowed me to take her hand, which I kissed gently.

"But... Lily-"

"I love you, Nina." I insisted. "Lily was a stumbling block. Nothing more than a evil Black Swan."

"And I am just the innocent foolish White Swan?"

"No, Nina," I took her face in my hands. "You are my Swan Queen."

She turned her face away.

"What if I don't want to be?" She asked softly.

I hesitated, taken aback.

"What do you mean?" I had to ask.

"I quit Swan Lake," she reminded me.

"That is not an issue. It would only take one word from me and Lily would give her spot back to you-"

"I quit Swan Lake," she repeated.

I stared at her.

"You don't want to be in it anymore?" I asked after a high-tensioned silence.

"No," she said firmly, gaging my reaction.

I pinched my lips as my thoughts raged within my mind.

Nina... after coming back, wants to leave as if she never had endeavored to be a dancer? She wants to throw away everything she has worked for for so long? Why, White Swan, why? Why throw away your life when your dream is waiting beyond the velvet curtain? Embrace the Black Swan in you and seize your dream before it slips away!

"You can't quit, Nina," I said suddenly.

Her eyes darkened spitefully. "Yes, I can."

"No, because I won't let you. Lily has seduced me, stolen your role, and taken over Swan Lake. She has turned your own dreams against you. You cannot let her do this to you."

"Y-yes, I can," she repeated uncertainly.

"My sweet Nina," I cooed, brushing a tear from her eye. "Do not be so afraid." I stared deeply into her eyes. "I am here with you."

I said nothing for a moment, debating whether or not I should ask, but I did anyway.

"Do you love me?"

Tears whelled in her eyes, and her lips trembled when she spoke.

"Yes."

I forced my smile to be small, my heart screaming with pleasure in my chest.

I said, "Good," and took her by the hands. "My love, you must do this for me. You must come with me to rehearsal this evening and you must claim your title back."

Her eyes fell down, avoiding mine.

"Nina, please. Make this sacrifice for your Prince, and I will never ask another thing from you."

Nina looked into my eyes and I looked into hers.

"Okay," she said submissively.

"That's a good girl," I said happily, kissing her tenderly on the forehead. She stood there quietly and let me kiss on her, her thin body rigid and almost cold, but I hardly noticed.