All too often life gets in the way, derailing even your best intentions. The night that Morgan confronted Reid he stayed at the office later than normal, long after his case paperwork was filed with JJ, to try to catch the younger man on his way out. Spencer asked Hotch for a ride home rather than taking the train, and wouldn't so much as meet Morgan's eyes as the two men walked past him on their way to Hotch's car, leaving Morgan staring after them and grinding his teeth in frustration.

Clearly Reid knew that Morgan was trying to get him alone, and he had no intention of letting that happen.

The next day, another case surfaced and the team found themselves boarding a plane to Colorado to hunt down an unsub who was decapitating young men and keeping their heads. It was enough to make anyone's stomach turn, even Derek's, strong as he pretended to be. It never ceased to amaze him how many utterly disturbed people there were in the world. Sometimes he didn't blame Gideon at all for leaving, especially considering how many years he had spent in the thick of this job.

Reid managed to sit as far away from Morgan as possible on the plane. When they buddied up for rooms he requested Hotch right away, leaving Morgan to pair off with Rossi. He wouldn't meet Morgan's eyes over the paperwork at the local police station or during meals, never stood too close or spoke to him directly about the case. Reid was never a particularly social person so it didn't seem as though the rest of the team thought much of his behavior, or even noticed it at all.

Morgan couldn't help but wonder if the others had the same suspicions he did. If so, he certainly couldn't tell by looking at them and, concerned as he was, he didn't feel it right to voice his opinion to anyone else, especially when he wasn't a hundred percent positive about what was going on. He didn't need to involve the rest of the team in speculation and give Reid a reason to alienate himself from everyone further.

Three days after they arrived in Colorado, Garcia was able to help track the unsub to a remote location in the forests on the outskirts of a small town. When they arrived to surround the place, a ramshackle cabin nestled deep in the trees, Morgan felt his mouth go dry. His eyes flicked over to Reid, but the young man seemed steady enough, brow furrowed and gun drawn as the team circled the place.

They found the unsub inside with his latest victim, a young man in his mid-twenties with a slim build and light brown hair who was tied to a chair in the middle of the room. The situation was so eerily familiar to the Tobias Hankel case that Morgan was sure he wasn't the only one who felt it.

He forced himself to remain professional. There was someone's life on the line and it wasn't Reid's – not right now. Rossi and Hotch took down the unsub while Morgan and Prenteiss freed the young man from his restraints. He was beaten and bleeding, and Morgan helped him hobble outside to the waiting ambulance.

As he passed Reid who was hovering in the doorway he could see that the young agent's face was pale and his mouth was set in a thin line. He wanted so much to lend his comfort, but now was not the time, nor the place. Yet again he had to wait.

Reid didn't join them for dinner that night, opting instead to go back to the hotel and go to bed early.

Derek couldn't wait to get back to Quantico where he could get Reid away from the rest of the team and speak to him alone. Again, Spencer sat far away from him on the plane, quiet and withdrawn, not speaking to anyone. He caught a cab at the airport, promising JJ he would file his paperwork the next day, and he was gone before Derek had the chance to say one word to him.

The kid was a pro at evasion, that was for damn sure.

The next day Spencer was over an hour late to work. Sitting there in the pit, waiting for him to arrive, Morgan felt his heart beating double time in his chest. Clearly he was being more obvious than he intended to be, because JJ stopped by his desk and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, you okay?"

Morgan looked up into her concerned face. As far as he knew, she was the closest friend Reid had on the team. That still didn't mean he had confided in her. "Yeah…yeah I'm fine. Just wondering where Reid is. Have you heard from him?"

JJ shook her head. "No…I know Hotch tried calling him about half an hour ago but he didn't answer." That did absolutely nothing to relieve Morgan's fears and he leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes and linking his hands over his head.

JJ sat down next to him and lowered her voice. "You're worried about him…aren't you?"

"Yes…I am. That case in Colorado…didn't that strike you as a little too familiar? I'm sure it did to Reid."

She nodded. "Creeped me the Hell out," she admitted. "Couldn't wait to get out of there. At least we saved the victim and the unsub is in custody."

"Yes, it had a relatively happy ending, but I'm sure all Reid saw when he looked at that kid tied to the chair was a mirror image of himself in Tobias Hankel's cabin." He sighed. "And with Gideon gone I don't think he's been confiding in anyone."

"He hasn't spoken to me," JJ said. She ran a hand through her blond locks and sighed. "Look, I'm sure he's going to be in soon, and Hotch is going to go easy on him…we all saw the similarities with that case and we all know it had to have hit him hard."

And yet again no one had spoken to the kid about it. Just left him to deal with it on his own. Wonderful. Morgan was pissed at himself for not trying harder. He could have followed the kid back to his hotel the last night in Colorado. He could have insisted on sharing a cab from the airport yesterday.

As he gave himself another mental beating he saw Reid open the door, walking in long quick strides towards his desk. He was wearing his typical button down shirt and tie, his hair messy and his eyes heavy lidded as though yet again he hadn't gotten much sleep. He tossed his bag down and sunk into his chair, picking up the phone on his desk.

"Hotch?" Morgan heard him say quietly. "I'm so sorry I'm late. Overslept. Yeah. Yeah, I know. I promise it won't happen again."

He set the phone back down on its cradle and seemed to notice the two pairs of eyes on him. He looked up sharply at Morgan and JJ. "What?" he demanded, his voice sharp in a way that made Derek's blood run cold.

JJ shook her head. "Just checking on Morgan's paperwork. I need yours too. Make sure you turn it in by the end of the day." Her cheeks were burning as though she'd been caught, and she hurriedly stood up and walked back to her office.

Reid turned his gaze to Morgan, his eyes narrowed. "Just wanted to make sure you're ok," he said by way of explanation. "Was worried when you were late this morning."

"Yeah…well…I'm fine." He turned his attention to his computer screen, ending the conversation.

Derek somehow made it through the rest of the day, which seemed to go at a glacial pace. He looked at the clock every five minutes, suffered through two meetings and three conference calls, finished his paperwork from Colorado, and made damn sure he was still there long after his work was done, waiting for Reid to leave.

It was close to nine and the BAU was almost deserted when JJ walked out of her office and into the pit. "Hey guys," she said. "It's getting late. You taking off soon?"

"Yeah," Reid said, not looking up from his computer. "Just wanted to finish up a few more things here…"

"Well if you're ready to go I'd be happy to drop you off on my way home." Reid looked up, saw Morgan staring at him, and hurriedly accepted her offer. "Yeah…thanks. That would be great." He started to shut down his computer and gather his files.

No way Morgan was letting this opportunity pass him by. He'd be damned if he didn't get Reid alone tonight.

"I'm on my way out too," he chimed in, standing up and joining the other two as they made their way to the door. "And I live closer to you than JJ does. How about I give you a ride home instead."

He shot JJ a look and she could clearly read the expression on his face. "Yes…" she said. "That's not a bad idea. Besides I have to stop by the grocery store and I need to get home…"

They were in the parking lot by now and Reid looked more than a little uncomfortable. "Nah…it's ok. I don't want to trouble you. I'll just take the train."

"It's no trouble," Morgan promised him.

"Night guys," JJ said, choosing to excuse herself from the conversation. She hurried towards her car, leaving the two men alone in the parking light under the orange glow of the street lamps.

They stood facing each other, both undoubtedly knowing it was a contest of wills. A contest Morgan was determined to win. "I'm giving you a ride home," he said with finality.

Spencer's expression went dark. "Really…it's fine. I can just take the train. I'll see you tomorrow." He turned to walk away.

"Spencer," Morgan growled, almost surprised by the warning tone of his voice.

The young man stopped in his tracks, turning back slowly.

"I know something is going on with you," Morgan said. "I know and I'm not going to stop asking about it just because you pretend everything's fine. Gideon's gone, we've had some tough as Hell cases lately, and I'm sure Colorado stirred up some unpleasant memories."

Spencer said nothing, his lips pressed together tight.

"Now get in the car," Morgan said, pointing. "And let me take you home. I'm not giving you another option."

Spencer hesitated for a moment before his shoulders finally sagged in defeat. He slowly made his way over and the two men climbed into the car. He slumped in the passenger seat, his arms folded tight across his chest, and rested his forehead on the windowpane. He refused to look in Morgan's direction.

Derek chose to wait a few moments until they were on the road before he spoke again. It was starting to drizzle and he turned on the windshield wipers to their lowest setting, the gentle scrape against the windshield the only sound in the car. He chewed the inside of his cheek, wondering the best way to broach this topic.

There was no good way.

"What's going on with you?" he said quietly, doing his best to keep his voice even.

Spencer didn't even turn to look at him. "What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb with me, kid. I'm a profiler, same as you, and I'm not falling for it. Now…tell me what's going on or I'm perfectly happy to drive to California and back if that's how long it's going to take for you to open up to me."

"There's nothing to talk about."

"Stop lying."

"You don't need to worry about me."

"Are you using again?"

Silence.

The question hung heavy in the air, and all Morgan could hear was the pounding of blood in his ears as he waited for Spencer's response. There was no going back now.

Spencer did turn to look at him this time. "No," he said, his voice low. "I'm not using again. And if I was, what business would it be of yours? I got clean all on my own."

It was Morgan's turn to be silent. That hurt.

"I know," he said quietly, his eyes narrowed on the road before him. In his mind's eye he saw Spencer's arm riddled with track marks, the way it looked in the hospital after he had been rescued. He wondered if that's how it looked now. "I…I should have been there for you."

"I didn't need anyone to be there for me. I've been taking care of myself since my dad walked out, remember?" His voice was like acid, and it stung.

"That doesn't mean you should have to," Morgan countered. "I wasn't there for you last time, and I hate myself for that. But I am not making that mistake again. I care about you kid, you have to believe that."

He didn't dare admit how much. Spencer definitely wouldn't be able to handle that knowledge right now.

"It's…it's not your problem," Spencer said, his voice calmer again. He sounded full of regret, as though he felt guilty for not letting Morgan help him. "It's nothing I can't handle on my own. Look, I know I've been screwing up lately…coming in late to work. I just haven't been sleeping well, that's all. It's nothing new."

"That's not all it is," Morgan said. They were pulling into the lot of Spencer's apartment building and he realized he was running out of time. Although he wasn't above locking the doors to keep the kid in the car…

"I'm not stupid. You're acting the way you did after we got you back from Tobias. Only this time Gideon isn't here. I can't believe that no one else sees it, but no one is saying anything. Well, that's not going to work for me anymore. I'm not going to let you go through this alone. I'm not." He pulled into a parking space in front of Spencer's building and the kid hurriedly unfastened his seat belt and ran his hands through his hair with a sigh.

"I promise you, it's nothing." He said. "I don't need anyone's help. I can take care of myself. I don't…I don't want your help, ok?"

"No, it's not ok."

Spencer turned and glared at him, his pale cheeks burning with anger. "It's. My. Business," he hissed, carefully enunciating each word. "And I would appreciate it if you didn't talk to the rest of the team about me behind my back."

"I haven't been," he promised. "And I swear I won't say anything. Whatever you tell me will be between us. You can trust me." Silence. "Please…Spencer…trust me."

His gaze blazed with anger and he stared at Morgan for a moment. Then, something shifted and his face softened, a stricken look entering his eyes that made Derek think he had succeeded in taking a chink out of the kid's armor that he had been building around himself since he was about five years old and learned that it was pointless to trust in anyone.

Just like that, the look was gone and he turned to get out of the car. "Goodnight, Morgan."

It wasn't ending like this.

Without a conscious thought, Morgan reached out and grabbed Reid's upper arm with one hand, holding him in a vice like grip. With the other he tore at the cuff of his sleeve, popping the button and dragging the material up and over his elbow.

"What the Hell are you doing?" Spencer exclaimed, trying to scramble back out of his grasp, only succeeding in throwing himself against the car door.

It was too late.

Morgan looked at Reid's arm. The arm where he expected to see the tell-tale track marks of drug abuse. His mouth went dry as he stared, tears burning behind his eyes.

Spencer's forearm was a mess of cuts, slices, scars, scabs, newly healed flesh and bloody lines that seemed to scream out at him. There had to be at least 25 marks that marred his perfect creamy skin. He was half-aware of Spencer still trying to pull free from his grip, but all he could do was stare. Most were horizontal lines across his arm, some intersected with others, none were deep enough to cause major blood loss but he could tell that they were in varying degrees of the healing process. He imagined that the other arm looked very much the same.

He finally found the strength to look into Spencer's eyes, and saw the glisten of tears that the younger man was trying to hide.

"How long has this been going on?" Morgan asked quietly, trying to keep his voice steady.

He could see Spencer swallow hard. He licked his lips. "Forever," he said, his voice barely audible. "Since I was little. I stopped for a long time. But after Gideon left…" he snapped his mouth shut as though realizing he had revealed too much and had to stop himself. "It's fine," he said suddenly. "I'm fine."

He tugged his arm out of Morgan's grasp and flinched as the other man's fingers slid against the cuts. He hurriedly rolled his sleeve back down and grabbed his tote bag from the floor.

"You're not fine," Morgan growled.

Spencer turned on him. "Stay the Hell out of my business, Morgan," he hissed with a viciousness Derek had never heard him use before. He almost sat back in shock. He was completely frozen.

"You need help," he managed.

"I don't need anything from you." He opened the door and got out.

"You need help!" Morgan called after him.

"Leave me the fuck alone!" Spencer shouted. He slammed the door and took off towards the steps of his building.

Go after him. Go after him. Go after him.

Morgan sat like a statue in his seat. He gripped the steering wheel with trembling hands. That was not what he was expecting. That was not… Oh, God. Reid. His pretty boy.

He wanted to break down crying.

Instead he put the car in reverse and peeled out of the parking lot.

TBC