To my surprise we reached the town, Moorings, with the last of the daylight fading out.
"Not bad timing, huh?" Adam smiled smugly.
"We would have been here a lot sooner if we hadn't helped you." I mentioned casually.
"And missed burning me with an agiel, you would have been miserable." he said, winking when I looked at him curiously.
I raised my eyebrow, amused by his boldness. Richard headed to the nearest inn, visibly excited about the thought of sleeping in a warm bed tonight.
As usual we were greeter with a horde of awestruck people. Their eyes were bright and hopeful as they looked at him, but guarded and almost hatful when they looked at me.
Holding my head high, I marched, just as confidently through the crowd, as my companions did.
Inside the building I rounded on Adam, "We got you here, it's time for you to be going on your own way."
Smiling like a fool, he wasn't offended al all by my outburst, "I know, but a man has to sleep. This place seems as good as any."
Adam paused, as if considering something for the first time, "Unless you have a specific place you would rather me sleep."
Adam had taken a step closer, letting his manly smell wash over me. I didn't step away, instead raised my face to stop just under his. I could feel his breathe on my lips, and the attraction in his eyes was easy to read.
"Would you like me to tell you where I think you should sleep?" I asked, making my voice husky.
He nodded, too turned on to say anything. I moved closer, pressing the front of my thighs to his, and resting a hand on his chest.
Before Adam could lover his head, the door opened behind him. Smiling I gave one big shove, and pushed him out the door. He landed on his butt, with a surprised yelp.
Looking up at me he froze, completely stopped moving. At first I thought he was still trying to get over the initial shock of my truck, but when I lift my hand to my face, I found I was still smiling.
Remembering the question I'd asked him, "I think you should sleep with the pigs."
Then I quickly shut the door and fallowed up the stairs the others had disappeared. I hadn't smiled at all since Leo,,,
"Cara, we're down here." Kahlan announced form the end of the hall.
Inside the small room I say only three beds, "I'll sleep on the ground." I put in quickly.
"Cara I've already set up a spot for myself, plus you slept on the floor last time." Richard stated gently.
"I don't mind, you don't have to do that-"
"Cara! You get a bed tonight. You haven't been sleeping well and we need you at your best."
Ashamed that the others had actually noticed I didn't sleep much anymore, I stopped arguing.
After a warm bath, and a hot meal, I dragged my weary body into the bed. My stomach started to turn slowly at the thought of succumbing to a place I had so little control over what went on. But as of lately I has no control.
Against my will, and fears, my eyelids drifted close.
When they opened again I stood in a desert. My head was fuzzy, but when a woman in red attacked me, I remembered exactly where I was.
Thrusting an agiel into the middle of the Dark Sister's chest, I didn't wait to see her fall. Hair flew into my face just as the dirty blonde haired man jumped in front of deadly magic.
"LEO…" I screamed, but it was to late.
The fight around me faded away, all that was left was the desert, a burnt body, and me.
I fell on my knees beside him, the smell of burnt flesh rushing up my nose. A tear ran unchecked down my cheek.
"Why are you crying?" asked a soft voice.
Looking up I saw Leo. When I looked back down his burnt body was gone.
Blubbering I whipped my head back to look at him again, afraid he would disappear, "But… you were dead. I saw you die, saving Kahlan."
Reaching out his hand, Leo pulled me up, he cradled me to his chest, holding me in is warm embrace.
"You're dead…" I whispered quietly.
"But I'm not gone, Cara." he promised.
"Yes he is Cara, you don't get him anymore." growled an evil voice, as the warm body I held started to fade away.
"Cara I'm still here, "Leo stated, ignoring Rahl but looking worried as he became less and less solid, "I'll always be with-"
And he was gone.
"Bring him back Rahl." I growled.
"Oh I tried to, I offered him multiple deals, but he wouldn't take any of them. Not even to come back to… you." he answered, inspecting his nails.
"That's not what I meant. This is my dream, and I want him back." I hissed.
"Why do you think you keep dreaming about him? You want him back. But I wonder Cara… how much do you want him back?" Rahl paused, looking straight in my eyes.
"Would you give up the Seeker for him? Or the Stone of Tears? Or maybe the Mother Confessor?"
With the mention of the Mother Confessor I remembered that Leo had died for this mission, and I was not going to have him died in vain, "No, there is no deal to be made with me either."
"Don't lie to me Cara… he thinks of you often you know. Or at least he does when he isn't thinking about the pain." Rahl laughed, as I wrapped my hand around a dagger.
"I said NO!" I spat, raising the weapon to lunge at him.
"Cara wake up!"
Sitting up straight I nearly hit heads with Richard. Looking at my right hand I saw the dagger. My hand was clenched around the blade, instead of the hilt.
"Cara this has gone on long enough, what happened while I was gone? Zedd and Kahlan told me not to ask, and said nothing themselves, but you obviously need help." Richard pressed, his voice slightly angry.
"Nothing… I'm fine." I said, the lie sounding weak even to me.
"No you're not. You don't sleep, and when you do you have nightmares. This time it was so bad you sliced your hand." he snapped, listing my weaknesses on one hand.
"Cara please, maybe I can help you."
With Richard's attempt to comfort me my stomach turned violently. With the uninjured hand clutching my mouth I ran from the room.
Richard started to run after me, but Zedd's gravely voice stopped him, giving me much needed time alone.
I made it out of the inn and to the tree line, before emptying the contents of my stomach on the ground.
Resting my back against a near by tree, I pondered Rahl's question. What would I give up to have Leo back again?
What if I were really presented with the choice between Leo and my companions? No! I could not start thinking that way. Leo gave himself up to save Kahlan, I needed to respect that.
Hut what if he didn't choose to die, a small voice asked un the back of my head, what if he counted on you to be there to save him? And you failed. You were too weak to save him. You were to weak to stop the feelings and now you're to weak to withstand the consequences.
"Stop, Stop… Stop!" I demanded, as another round of retching took over my body.
Somebody came up behind me, quietly pulling my hair from in front of my face. When I was done the gentle hands pulling me into sitting position. After so many sleepless nights and then the vomiting episode, I was to tired to object. Laying against his chest, with my head on their shoulder, I fell asleep.