Okay, okay don't kill me! I know I'm super late, but it's just been one thing after another for quite a while!

This chapter is dedicated to Little Miss Artist and Supernaturalrenegade because without either of them you'd all be waiting another week for this update!

So this chapter is all Sam and John. I'm sorry it's a little short but it just seemed like a good place to stop. I hope John isn't too out of character.

On that note, there is only one more chapter. There are like a zillion things I need to wrap up so it'll hopefully be longer.

Warnings: see chap 1
Disclaimer: See chap 1
Beta: Little Miss Artist
Word Count: 1,800
Chapter: 20/21
Next Update: Friday

Textus

Chapter 20: Serendipity

Sam took a deep breath. He was tired of waiting, might as well get it over with.

As much as his conversation with Dean had brought nothing but relief, he knew it was far from over. There was still John. And Sam had a feeling John would be pissed to hell about everything.

But no one came. All morning Sam sat in his room, mostly reading or staring at the ceiling, just waiting for John to come, but he never showed. Dean had gone back to work and John had stayed behind so Sam knew he was there.

It was like watching a horror movie when the girl goes back into the house, but you know the killer is actually in there. Dramatic irony? Is that what the English teacher had called it? So then you're sitting there, just waiting for the killer to strike…

But he never had. And eventually the waiting got to Sam so he crawled from his room and walked down the hall like he was sentencing his own damnation.

He slowly poked his head around the corner of the door to see John standing by the stove.

Sam knew it wouldn't last. The home cooked meals and the putting up with his less than jovial mood. Soon, probably once they left town, it'd end. The werewolf hunt was that Friday, three days away. Then they'd move on and pretend like it never happened. Just like they always did.

Someday Sam would make it stop. Someday he'd go to college and make something out of himself. And someday he'd have his chance at normal.

But someday was a long way away. And right now, he just needed to take it one step at a time. And if that meant poking the sleeping bear, then so be it. Better than standing outside the entrance, being lulled into a false sense of security, only for the bear to wake up and catch you unaware.

"Dad?" he said quietly.

"Took you long enough." Right, of course John realized he'd been standing by the door for almost three minutes. He was a hunter. And apparently Sam was a moron.

Sam gathered all his nerves, shoved them in the Ignore Box in the back room of his head, and walked into the kitchen.

This was it. He didn't even know what he wanted to say, just that he wanted to say it. Come clean about something. Really what he wanted was to throw himself forward and have John wrap his arms around his son and just hold him there, enjoying the moment. He wanted a father. Not a drill sergeant. Not a brother who played the father. A real father who would support him and encourage him and tell him to strive for his dreams; one who'd be proud of him for his academic achievements, hell maybe even encourage him to try harder and aim for an Ivy league. Right now he'd be lucky if he could get into a community college. Assuming John even let him apply, which Sam doubted.

But no. He got John.

It wasn't that he didn't love his family. Of course he did. He'd do anything and everything for them in an instant. But that didn't mean he didn't want a little for himself.

"Um, what's for dinner?"

What's for dinner? Seriously? Twenty minutes mental preparation to ask what was for dinner? Honestly.

"Spaghetti."

"Oh…okay." Great, Sam, great job. Mission Clear the Air Between Sam and Dad? Fail. Mission Act like an Idiot? Complete success.

"Yeah," John said awkwardly.

Sighing, Sam turned to go.

"Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"Was there something you wanted to say?" It sounded weird coming from John, but Sam appreciated that John was throwing him a line.

"Yes…I don't know…I guess I just figured you'd be mad." Sam felt like a five year old.

"I was…and I guess I still am a bit…I just don't understand," John said, sounding frustrated with himself.

"Well…" Sam said slowly. He wasn't used to John like this. Usually he was emotionless and always confident in himself and it was just weird to see him as anything but.

"What do you want me to say?" Sam asked, like it wasn't him who'd wanted the conversation in the first place.

"I just don't get why! What is so wrong about everything? Don't you get that I try? I try so damn hard and Dean tries and we all try and you just don't appreciate any of it and, God, Sam, give us a little slack now and then. Because I'm doing the best I can and I need to do this and I can't understand why you don't get that and-" He was taking very fast by the end and waving his hands around wildly, splattering the walls with dots of spaghetti sauce from the spoon still in his hand.

Sam was lost. But he could tell the storm was coming. John rambling was never a good thing. It was the clouds rolling in. He was about to ask John to clarify when he realized John was still going, quicker still.

"Dean was so easy and you're so hard. And sometimes I think you do it intentionally just to piss me off. You're not in it and I get that but I wish you'd get in it because it's damn tiring fighting with you on everything and I get that school is important to you, but don't be selfish, there are other things-"

"Don't call me that!" Sam screeched. His eyes lit up with fury and his hands curled into fists by his side.

"What? Selfish? News flash, Sam, it doesn't evolve around you-"

"No!" Sam screamed. "Don't you call me selfish." Sam was closing in. Nearing his father in height, Sam used his tallness to his ability as he got right up in his father's face. "You have no damn right to call me that, you hypocrite!"

"Samuel! Don't you use that tone with me-" But Sam wasn't finished. Wouldn't be finished until he had damn well said it all. Leaping in front of the train only got you flattened, it certainly didn't stop the wild engine.

"You who drag me and Dean all over the fucking country, from shit hole to shit hole so you can go on some wild goose chase after the man who killed a mother I never knew!"

"Don't talk about your mother like that!"

"I'm not finished!" Oh Lordie was he going to be in trouble. "We could have just gone on with our lives – normal lives! No lies and no scams and no moving around!"

"After what happened to your mother? After I found out what was out there? How could I go on in good conscious knowing people were being killed everyday? Hunting is the only revenge we can get."

"Revenge on what? Huh, Dad, answer that. Did that werewolf you're gonna gank on Friday kill mom? Because I'm pretty sure it didn't."

"That-"

"And we only find a hunt if enough people die for us to notice. So what, four people die for us to maybe save one?"

"Better one than none-"

"And you realize it will never end right? We'll just keep fighting for ever and ever. Evil isn't gonna stop coming, Dad. So then what? We just keep going until we die? Until one of us is killed in some hunt?"

"Don't say that!" Sam was almost hesitated. Almost. That was the first time in probably forever that Sam had ever heard any shred of weakness in his Dad's voice. But Sam was on a rampage, and bulls don't stop easily.

"You don't think it's gonna happen? Seriously, Dad? We've each had how many brushes with death already? And in case you haven't noticed, we have luck from hell. Sooner or later it's gonna catch up with one of us. Then what? We just keep going until the next one drops?"

"Samuel Winchester! You shut your mouth right now before I shut it for you!"

"What the hell is going on?" Both head turned sharply to see Dean standing in the doorway, keys still hanging limply from his hand.

Still breathing deeply, Sam shot one last glare at John before storming for the door. Dean, having one of his occasional moments of brilliance, stepped aside quickly.

Right before he left, Sam turned around to face his small family. They seemed to be holding their breath almost, just waiting to so what would happen.

"YOU NEVER LISTEN!" Sam screamed so loudly he wouldn't be surprised if birds were flying from the trees ten miles away.

He turned on his heel and stormed into his room.

"Sam?"

"Dean, go away."

"That's great, but I'm not Dean." Sam froze. He thought it would be Dean. He didn't think his dad would come. Why was he there anyway? To yell some more? Sam was done yelling. They'd done too much already.

And in honesty, he felt bad. Really bad. He had no right to say the things he did. He didn't mean most of them. But selfish was just too close to home. After all, that one tiny word had started it all.

"Go away."

The door opened. John stood in the doorway awkwardly.

"What?" Sam couldn't help but snap. He didn't turn to look. He remained laying eagle-spread on his bed, face staring at the ceiling like the cracks spelled out the answers.

Sam could see John shift from the corner of his eye.

"Sam…"

Sam wasn't sure what it was that made him do it. Maybe it was the weary exhaustion that should never be in his dad's voice. Or maybe it was the flare of guilt in him. Or maybe he had simply finally had his fill of the fighting.

Whatever his reasons, there wasn't the tiniest bit of hesitation.

Sam was out of the bed, across the room and wrapping his arms around John before he even realized he'd gotten up.

"'m sorry, 'm sorry," he muttered over and over again.

There was a sudden chill in his spine.

What on Earth was he doing?

John was like the King of No Emotions and here Sam was, breaking down like a baby. What would John do? Would he shove him back and declare him weak?

But to Sam's surprise, John's arms came around him just as tightly as Sam's had. Pulling Sam to his chest, John rested his chin on Sam's head.

"So am I kiddo."

TBC…

Review Replies:

Judyann: Well I do strive for maximum mushiness ;) Well I couldn't have Dean stomping down on poor Sammy's talent! The ballerina lines is one of my favorites, though it was a last minute add in. I know! I'm loving season 7!

Sammy4evacasuehesawesome: Well, good. Oh, yes, Dean will indeed be kicking some ass. Next chapter, then you'll get your ass kicking Dean. Thanks!

Hummingfox: Well, yeah! I couldn't have Dean killing Sam's passion! Sadly, no Bobby, just the Winchesters. Honestly, I kind of forgot about him *sheepish whistling* Thank you! Real life does come first and sometimes it just gets in the way!

Raven: I apologize for not researching the topic thoroughly enough. I'll keep that in mind in the future. I'm pretty sure I never said it was me and I think that was a bit inappropriate of you to ask me that so I won't answer. Though, you're definitely right that FF is for good and bad reviews. It's criticism and I will definitely try and make sure I research the topic more in the future.

Nyx Ro: They are indeed his own worst enemy. That's very interesting, I didn't know that. Thanks!

TinTin11: Next chapter, just one more chapter and you'll get to find out about the dog. Just hang on!

PenguinLova0720: Don't worry about it, I understand. Thanks. Oh, you're good, next chapter and you'll see how close you are.

Casammy: Couldn't agree more. Sam is never alone and it really is more important his relationship with Dean then his relationship with John. Thanks!

LeighAnnWallace, jennytork, supernaturalmad, sarah, fledglingfeathers, lizzieten, sparkiebunny, Hi there: Thanks, love to hear from you all, no matter how short or long!