Look! Look, I updated! Aren't y'all proud of me? Isn't this TOTALLY AWESOME?

So, we have our first proper introduction to the insanity that is Avril. If I'm brutally honest, even I don't know how she leapt out of my brain. Seriously...

If you didn't realise last chapter, I don't own Glee. If I did, AVRIL WOULD BE CANON. BUT SHE'S NOT. AND THE WARBLERS AREN'T GONNA BE IN SEASON THREE.

Was that a spoiler? Eh.

*sobs heart-brokenly at the loss of Wevid* Even though, you know, canon KILLED cool Wevid...

"You told him to do what?"Blaine glanced up at Avril, wincing at the furious expression spread across her features.

At five foot three inches, Avril Anderson was, in polite terms, short. She was also devastatingly beautiful, with pale blonde curls that almost reached her hips and large, slanted dark eyes, thickly lined in dark eye-liner most of the time, which hinted at her Japanese mother. She was petite in a delicately pretty way, and looked like if you pushed her too hard she'd shatter; but in all honestly, she had the shortest temper Blaine had ever seen, and considering her parents had enrolled her into every club she could be enrolled in-including Kendo and other self-defence classes-since she was three years old, that temper could easily be turned to violent use.

Not a good thing, especially with a gavel-wielding Wes sat toBlaine's left, pouring over a Literature text book.

"I told him to confront this bully. I wish I'd done that when I had to put up with it at my old school; this way, things might actually get better for him." Avril's scowl darkened.

"We both know I would have happily confronted all your bullies, and soundly,Blaine, if you hadn't been so damn determined to deal with things yourself. But you do realise what you've done, right?"Blaine blinked at the girl owlishly, and she let out a groan of frustration, pacing in front of the table Blaine and the Tweedles were studying at.

"You have convinced your pretty pretty nymph to confront a bully who is violent towards him. And because you've been texting him all day telling him to have courage, he's probably going to go through with it." Wes blinked, before smirking lightly at Avril's words, amused.

"I like that; it's 's 'pretty pretty nymph'." Avril rolled her eyes, ignoring the boy, before setting her hands on the table in front ofBlaineand leaning towards him.

"Are you listening to me, Blaine? You just told a one hundred and fifty pound boy to confront a violent bully who's probably twice his size!"Blainestared at her for a moment, before swallowing thickly.

"Shit." He mumbled; and Avril threw up her hands, rolling her eyes.

"Finally; that brain you claim to have shows signs of life." Blaineglared at the World History book sat in front of him, inwardly scolding himself for being so fucking stupid.

"What the hell have I done?" He muttered angrily; and Avril sighed softly.

"Look, don't take it out on yourself; your advice would have been great if it was just verbal. Hell, I'm guessing at the time that you thought it was just verbal; I only know things have gotten violent because I'm friends with one of the teachers at McKinley."Blainedidn't look up and-in a gesture which shocked those sat around him to the core-ran his fingers through his hair, causing it to stick up crazily. Avril frowned at him for a moment, before crossing her arms over her chest.

"Alright. Because you care about your pretty pretty nymph so much already, I'll drive down to McKinley and keep an eye on him; make sure he doesn't end up maimed or something equally upsetting. Just keep your phone on, and keep on with your 'courage' thing; you don't want to freak him out by stopping."Blaineblinked a couple of times, before looking up at his cousin.

"I don't want you to get hurt, Avril." She just rolled her eyes at him, and pulled a gavel from the back pocket of her shorts; causing Wes to splutter in shock.

"I'm borrowing this, okay Wesley?" She offered sweetly, before turning and striding out of the room; before her head poked back in, and she held up a set of keys.

"Oh; and I'm borrowing your car, Blaine." She stated; before disappearing and leaving Blaineto lament over the fact he may have condemned his car-his baby-to a painful death.

"Bum, bum, ba-dum, bum, bum, ba-dum..." Avril launched into a ninja roll as she turned a corner, ignoring the teacher walking down the hall who was shooting her confused looks, Wes' gavel clutched tightly in one of her hands, still humming the mission impossible theme tune as she searched the halls for Blaine's pretty pretty nymph.

Avril Anderson never did anything in half measures.

She ran down the hall in a low crouch, scanning the classrooms she passed for a head of carefully-styled dark hair; only to pause when she reached the boys locker room, frowning as she heard a high but still distinctly masculine voice from inside, fighting with someone else. She peered into the room, dark eyes round and curious; only to bite back a gasp asBlaine's pretty pretty nymph was practically jumped by a boy in a letterman jacket, who was almost twice his size.

Damn. Holly was right. She thought as she watched Kurt shove the boy off, his hand darting to his lips. Avril bit back a growl when the jock went in to kiss Kurt again; only to have to fight the urge to cheer when Kurt pushed him away for the second time.

As far as she was concerned, Kurt had been claimed asBlaine's almost as clearly as if someone had stamped 'property of Blaine Anderson' across his forehead.

When the jock left, Avril watched Kurt, closely, hesitating; before she walked into the locker room, and caught the boy when his knees gave way.

"Hey." She breathed, helping him sit on the bench, lightly rubbing his back in soothing circles as he tried to calm his ragged breathing.

"It's alright." She murmured, resting her head on top of his where he'd set it on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, pushing himself up and scrubbing at his eyes with his sleeve.

"I don't even know you." He offered, glancing at her briefly before looking away. Avril smiled at him, and held out a hand for him to shake.

"Just call me your own personal expert spy." She grinned when he smiled at her words, and lightly bumped his shoulder with hers.

"Do you have someone you can call?" She asked softly. He glanced up at her; before a wave of panic spread over his face, and he looked back at the door to the hall.

"Dammit, I forgot, I dropped my...phone..." He trailed off as Avril pulled the phone she'd found earlier in the hall from her back pocket. She shrugged lightly when he stared at her.

"I found it when I was walking down the hall." She offered, and smiled when he took it from her, his eyes welling up with tears.

"Hey." She said softly, lightly taking hold of one of his hands.

"I get that you don't know me; but, if it was me who'd just gone through that, I'd make sure that the next time I try anything like confronting him again, I had someone to back me up. Just in case." Kurt studied her for a moment, obviously unsure as to whether he could trust her; before smiling and nodding.

"Okay." He said softly, and Avril grinned in response.

"I've got to go berate a close relative of mine, but I promise I'll see you around." She stated, grinning briefly before getting to her feet and squeezing his hand before releasing it. Avril headed for the door, beginning to hum the mission impossible theme under her breath again; before glancing back at Kurt.

"Stay strong." She offered with a half smile; before leaving the room, launching into the theme tune again, and dropping into a ninja roll around the corner, while simultaneously pulling her own phone from her pocket.

Avril dialled a number quickly, and held the phone to her ear as she snuck towards the entrance to the school.

"David;Blaineis about to get a rather frantic call from his pretty pretty nymph. Make sure he doesn't make any more stupid suggestions, alright?" Avril smiled slightly at something the boy on the other end said, and nodded to herself as she snuck out the doors, running for where she'd parkedBlaine's car.

"Yeah. Tell him I'll be there in an hour. He can thank me later."

"Alright. Now how are you going to act?"

"Calm and composed, and in control."

"And why are you going to act that way?"Blaine sighed heavily, rolling his eyes before he turned to look at Wes and David.

"Because if I act freaked out so will Kurt, and then Avril will feel the compulsion to beat someone up because as far as she's concerned I'm about as defenceless as a baby bird." Avril, sat on the hood of Blaine's car not far behind the Tweedles, nodded wisely.

"True; very true. Now go woo your pretty pretty nymph by displaying your good intentions." Blaine flushed at her words, ignoring Wes and David when they snickered, before taking a deep breath, composing himself, and turning to enter McKinley and find his 'pretty pretty nymph'.

Avril looked up from where she'd been texting, and grinned slyly at Wes and David.

"Want to go watch him and his pretty pretty nymph have eye-sex?" She offered; and the Tweedles exchanged a look, before grinning broadly.

"Of course!" David declared.

YAAAY, Cool!Wevid, a bit of angst, some Blaine and even a generous splash of Avril. Isn't this wonderful so far? Eh, I'm so tired...*Almost falls asleep before remembering she should be writing this authors note...heh.*

So yeah. I'm sure you know the drill. Please; REVIEW.

Oh, and if you want to skip on over to my Tumblr (god, it took me three tries to spell that right, I'M SO SLEEPY!) account-also Keariel-you can see a post called 'Rain', which asks you to drop me a prompt for a new one-shot or two. DO IT. DOOO IIITTTT. You know you want to. And my brain is starved of one shot ideas which aren't riddled with angst. I NEED FLUFF. PROMPT ME ON HERE IF YOU MUST, JUST PLEASE. DYING.

I love you all, you wonderful readers. And now, I sleep!

Keariel