I CAN'T DO IT! I CAN'T WATCH DARREN CRISS ON GLEE AND NOT WANT TO KIDNAP HIM. There is far too much cute-dorky-hot-ness in this one person for me to be capable of reacting rationally. I really really want him. It my birthday on the 11th; you can all be real nice and kidnap him for me as a late birthday present, if you want. ;)

...or you can review. That would be alright too. :)

I DO NOT OWN GLEE. Seriously. Warbler spin-off; it would exist! And Avril would have made an appearence in TPPP. Just sayin'; I saw the whole thing with her factored in. I may end up extending this into Season Three the way things are looking... ;D

"Okay. Explain what happened to me again, and slowly, so that I know for sure my overwhelming need to throttle you right now isn't totally unjustified." Avril could almost see Sam rubbing at the back of his neck; a habit all the Warblers seemed to adopt when they were nervous.

Or maybe it was a defence mechanism, for when she was pissed at them, because they knew it made them look cute.

Regardless of the reason, whether Sam was or wasn't rubbing the back of his neck was moot point. She couldn't see him, and therefore her growing temper, fed by his hesitance, wouldn't be stifled by cute boyish gestures.

"So, the girls in our Glee club-those with jock boyfriends, at least-asked us to stand up to Karofsky for Kurt; stop him bullying him. It got kinda violent and Quinn's been pressing ice against my eye for the last half hour." Avril sat incredibly still in her bed for a moment, staring, unblinking, at the wall opposite her, Sam waiting nervously for her response.

"You have no idea how desperately I want to be well enough to come and kill you myself right now, Samuel." She offered simply; and as she should have expected, the only part he really latched onto was the 'if I was well enough' part.

"What? You're sick? How sick? Blaine's looking after you, right? And the other Warblers too?" Avril rolled her eyes, and shifted against the pillows arranged at her back.

Honestly, it was like having seventeen over-protective brothers.

"Bee is not looking after me, Sammi. He is smothering me. I'm going to die of suffocation before this fever gets me." Sam chuckled on the other end of the phone, and Avril scowled.

"He must be, if you're calling him 'Bee'. You know how much he hates that nickname." Avril rolled her eyes at the boy's words.

"Of course I do; why else would I be using it? And you can't avoid this, Sam. Why didn't you call me first? Anyone with a brain could have told you it was going to end badly, even with four against one." There was an uncomfortable silence on the other end, and Avril frowned.

"What aren't you telling me?" Sam remained silent on the other end for a moment longer, before clearing his throat uncomfortably.

"Finn wasn't there. Since Puck's still on probation, it was just me Mike and Artie against Karofsky." Avril glared at the wall; before grabbing a book off her bedside table and throwing it at the wall.

"Bastard." She hissed; and heard Sam's tutt of disproval from the other end of the phone.

"Don't defend him, Sammi. He should have been the first one to suggest standing up to Karofsky; I'm only Blaine's cousin and I was ready to fight all his battles for him when he was in Kurt's situation. Finn's going to be Kurt's brother by the end of the week." Sam's answering sigh deepened Avril's scowl.

"Yeah, but you and Blaine have always been really close, Avril. You're practically like twins. Last year Finn was struggling with the idea of Kurt being gay in the first place; now he's supposed to stand up against homophobic bullying? The guy is never intentionally homophobic, but it's still a lot for an Ohio born-and-bread kid to cope with." Avril rolled her eyes, and pouted softly.

"Doesn't stop him being a douche." She muttered, and Sam chuckled softly and sympathetically.

"Yeah, well, hopefully Karofsky will get the picture and leave Kurt alone now, so it won't matter if Finn's up to defending him or not." Avril made of soft hmm of agreement, drumming her fingers against her leg, before Sam spoke again.

"So how far down the line are you? Have you started your weird cravings yet? I remember when you had Melody running back and forth getting you various flavours of jelly when you were ill last year." Avril chuckled softly, wrapping part of her cover around a fist.

"I just finished the weird hallucinations, I think. I watched Aladdin this morning, and saw the whole thing being acted out by various members of the Warblers. Wes would make a pretty good Abu, now that I think about it…" Avril conveniently left out that Princess Jasmine had been replaced by none other than one Kurt Hummel, and instead listened to Sam's laughter with a half-smile.

"It's kinda weird without you here, Sam. Ethan's hopeless without you." Sam sighed softly on the other end of the phone.

"Well, you know better than anyone why I couldn't stay at Dalton; with the tuition, and buying the new house…maybe next year, if we're lucky." Avril smiled briefly to herself.

"Yeah. Maybe next year." She glanced up as her door was pushed open, revealing a pair of smirking Warbler Councillors; or at least she assumed they were smirking, because their mouths were covered by surgical masks. Avril sighed heavily.

"I've got to go. The Tweedles are here, and Bee has probably given them some dastardly chore he knows would result in my resorting to biting if he did it." Sam laughed at her words, before offering his farewells and hanging up.

Avril regarded the masked Wes and David warily.

"What has he sent you to do?" She asked hesitantly, looking between them nervously; before David held up a small, brown-glass bottle.

"Medicine time, Avril!" He sang through his mask. She stared at him for a moment; before rolling out of her bed and sprinting for the bathroom.

Or, at least, attempting to, before falling flat on her face.

"Ow." She mumbled; while Wes and David just snorted in amusement.

"The power lines went out, and I am all alone; but I don't really care at all, not answering my phone..." Blaine paused outside the choir room, smiling at the voice leaking through the doors, accompanied by the soft strumming of a guitar. He hesitated only briefly before pushing open the door and peaking in; only to grin when her saw the two girls sat on one of the couches; the blonde strumming, her sleeves pushed up around her elbows, while the petite red-head sang, apparently giving it her all. Blaine watched for a moment; before wincing with the pair when the red-head's voice cracked on a high, drawn out note. Avril sighed softly and set her guitar down, lightly resting a hand down on the other girl's shoulder.

"You're doing great, Mary. You just need to work on your upper range, but I'm sure you'll be back the way you were before the operation in no time." Mary smiled nervously, before ducking her head in a quick nod.

"Thanks Avril; you're a good friend. Same time next week?" Avril grinned, but then hesitated for a moment before speaking again.

"It'll be at my Mom's house next week; I'll text you the address." She offered; and Mary nodded with a smile before getting to her feet and heading for the door, smiling at Blaine when she passed him.

"Your mom is coming back then?" He offered; and Avril jumped, turning to blink at Blaine in surprise; before her eyes narrowed.

"How long have you been stood there?" She asked suspisciously, and Blaine arched an eyebrow, amused by the blonde's reaction to his presence.

"Since Mary started singing 'Candles'. Why?" Avril seemed to deflate with relief at his words, and smiled sweetly at him, before patting the vacated spot on the couch beside her.

"No reason. Now stop hovering in the doorway; I'm not going to bite. Jeez, Blaine. You have such a low opinion of me." Blaine rolled his eyes, before obediently moving to sit beside his cousin, and grinning briefly when she flopped against him with a huff.

"Feeling better?" He asked with a half smile; and she glanced up at him, smiling sheepishly.

"Yeah. I think that medicine might have actually worked." Blaine snorted and rolled his eyes, while Avril scowled and smacked him on the arm; only prompting him to chuckle at her pathetic attempt to hurt him. Avril rolled her eyes, and shifted so her back was pressed against his side.

"I hate you, Blaine Anderson. And I'm glad my mom is coming back; it's means I can get away from you." Blaine chuckled, and ruffled her curls, prompting a growl from her.

"I love you too, Avril Anderson. And you never did get round to answering me when I asked about that; I thought your mom wasn't coming back for another month?" Avril shifted uncomfortably, and avoided looking back at him.

"Yeah, um, I may have asked her to come back early. After getting that call, I don't really want to be here without her anymore. And it's my birthday in two weeks, after all; I don't want to have to fly out to Paris to spend my sixteenth birthday with half my family." Blaine's frown, which had appeared after the mention of the phone call which had caused so much grief last week-had it only been a week ago?-faded at the mention of her step-dad and siblings, and he smiled.

"It would be nice to see Jack and the others again." Blaine mused; and Avril smirked at him, looking back over her shoulder.

"You know, I sometimes get the feeling you like my step-brother more than me." Blaine blinked at her innocently, tilting his head to the side in a gesture which made her glare at him.

"Was there ever any doubt? Jack's hot; while you're, you know. A girl." Avril growled and grabbed a pillow from beneath her sock-clad feet, twisting so she was sat on her knees to hit Blaine with it, her attacks becoming less effective as she started to giggle, while Blaine just laughed and held his arms over his head.

A polite, but obviously amused, cough from the doorway drew their attention. Jeff grinned as he watched the pair separate, Avril quickly sitting on the pillow and blinking innocently, before turning his attention to Blaine.

"Wes is having a melt-down. David isn't back until tomorrow, Thad is busy texting his girlfriend; and...well, no one wants to disturb that. But that only really leaves you to remind him that things aren't going to fall to crap during Sectionals. Nick seemed to think he was about to start hyperventilating when he found me." Blaine rolled his eyes at the news of his over-dramatic best friend, while Avril just blushed when Jeff turned his attention to her and grinned.

"It's good to see you're feeling better, Ramona; we were a little worried there for a moment." Avril bit her bottom lip lightly, before grinning at the blonde boy.

"Thanks, Jeff." She mumbled shyly; and he smiled at her again, before turning and heading off. Blaine watched Avril, intrigued by the pink colour of her cheeks, before she shoved him off the sofa, glaring at him when he was on the floor.

"You tell anyone, and I will end you." She stated menacingly, waving a finger in his face; before Blaine smirked and sat up, only for his expression to slip into a frown.

"Doesn't Jeff have a girlfriend, Ramona?" The girl rolled her eyes and scoffed at his words.

"Yeah, Bee, because I can totally control who I develop feelings for. I'm hardwired so that if someone is already dating someone else, it's impossible for me to find them attractive. Hmm. Yeah. That's a totally logical assumption." Blaine chuckled at her sarcasm; before both their phones began to ring, the ring-tones clashing. The pair exchanged a look, before pulling out their phones; and then looking at one another again.

"Sam." Avril offered. Blaine frowned.

"Kurt." He stated; and they both answered simultaneously, to be met by speedy conversation on the other end, in Avril's case. She heard Sam's voice cut over all the others, telling them to shut up, before he explained why he was calling.

"Kurt's transferring to Dalton."

"What?"

So that's it; the end of 'Furt'. Did you enjoy it? I hope you did. Because special education is next, and that is going to be fricking YARDS LONG. I'm telling you, I can forsee like...over ten thousand word for this next episode.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Review? Pretty please? :)

P.S the Ramona thing will be explained next chapter. :)