Note: This Chapter contains Adult Content. If that is not your cup of tea don't read it. It's the only part of the story that contains it.
I Miss You, Love
I've run out of complicated theories
So now I'm taking back my words and I'm preparing for the breakdown
Your t-shirt's lost its smell of you And the bathroom's still a mess
Remind me why we decided this was for the best
Jax had been home for a month, one very long month. A time which everything seemed up in the air. The new day seemed to bring forth new possibility while threatening to crush the life out of another. Nothing was concrete, nothing was even close to being figured out, and how could it when one half of the equation didn't even know the other existed.
It wasn't cheating, not to Haley, because Haley would never cheat. It wasn't in her bones, in her make up. She wasn't capable of such cruelty. She and Jax had nothing cast in stone, they weren't back together. As the days passed they spent more and more time together. A few heated moments had transpired, but nothing below the belt. The old feelings still there, the spark reigniting, but nothing was official. Haley insisted they take it slow, too much time had past to just jump back into an old groove that may not even still work.
The whole time Jax was trying to win Haley back she still lived with Dean, and why not, besides Gemma no one knew what had gone on between them. Since Jax's return Dean and Haley never came together again, not like that. Dean found his fall for Haley harder to deny every day, but he would never betray his brother. He would sacrifice his own needs and wishes in a second for his family, and that's exactly what Dean was doing. Haley felt the same as Dean, while it was undeniable something bigger then they had ever intended it to be had transpired between her and Dean, but she knew it couldn't continue while she was trying to figure things out with Jax.
So here they where like the roommates and long times friends they were. Dean sat at one corner of the couch, while Haley sat beside him. Curled in a ball, the side of cheek rested on the back cushion of the couch. Her knees tucked under her chin as they shared a thin blanket. The movie was one of Dean's favorites, The Shining. He always had a thing for Jack in this movie, but tonight his eyes kept wandering back to her. She could feel his gaze like the blazing sun upon her skin. She could already picture that charming gleam to his emerald eyes if she dared to glance his way. A look that could always get him anything he wanted, and the worst part was… He knew it.
Dean's stare had become blatant over the past few minutes, not once had he glanced back at the screen. His piercing emerald eyes made Haley's heart race and belly flutter until she couldn't take it anymore. Finally against her better judgment her eyes glanced over at him beside her and found what she already expected, his eyes took her captive with his spell in a second.
"Don't look at me like that." She spoke up with a growing coy smile that formed on it's own brought on by him and that look in his eye.
Staring deep into Haley's breathtaking honey orbs so close and yet so far away, Dean felt like he couldn't help himself. His will had been strong, his intentions good. He would stand on the sidelines and let Jax and Haley figure this one out. But tonight staring at her as she practically glowed beside him, Dean couldn't fight the feeling any longer.
"Why?" He tested her with a sexy slow forming smirk, already knowing her answer.
Something mischievous filled Haley's pupil with his challenge. Her heart told her to fight it, her mind screamed at her to pull back, but looking into Dean's captivating eyes, his irresistible smirk, she felt herself giving in. She felt herself missing him, missing what they had. The way he always got her. "Because you know what it does to me." Haley honestly admitted, the words coming thicker and more wanting off her breath then she had intended.
As her warm breath splashed his face, as something needy filled her eyes that were locked with his, Dean knew they were in trouble. That they had started something there might not be a cure for. A fire that can't be put out. Against his better judgment, Dean's thick callused hand rose to her cheek, the softness of her skin quenching a thirst he had no idea how hungry he had been for. Dean leaned in and rested his forehead against Haley's a his deep tempting voice came out unraveled. "Yeah?"
Their lips so close they could almost touch, his eyes lost deep somewhere inside her. Haley could feel it, rushing through her veins, pumping from her heart. This want, this need, that didn't just scream for Dean, it demanded him. Slipping away, Haley let herself get lost in the moment and the way he could make her feel inside. The way he could make her heart race and fill to capacity. "Yeah," She confirmed on a shuttered breath, her senses barely hanging on by a thread.
Without another word, or even a need for one, Dean's mouth leaned forward and captured her lips in his own. Haley eagerly accepted the brush of his lips as her own held him back just as strong.
Haley's hands slipped out from under the blanket and wildly gripped for Dean as their kiss exploded into something more, like a single spark ignites a wildfire in a field of dry brush. Dean kissed Haley like their was no tomorrow, like this was their last moment and if he didn't take it there would never be another chance. His strong hands grabbed her body trying to pull her closer to him, trying to get them as close as humanly possible as if his very life depended on it.
Haley cupped Dean's prickled cheeks as their lips crashed wildly together, his stubble burned her skin until their mouths slipped open. As their tongues met warm and wet the kiss slowed down, but grew deeper and more sensual, more dangerous then their frantic kisses ever were.
Dean's urgent hand slipped Haley's leg off the couch as his other tried to hook her knee on the opposite side of his hip, placing her around him. So they could come together chest to chest, stomach to stomach, hip to hip. The delirious inducing tangle of their mouths, coupled with the frantic motion of Dean's hands as he tried to reposition Haley sent their balance off course, and they both tumbled backwards onto the cushions.
As Dean landed onto her smaller body, nestled between the skin of her thighs where her shorts had ridden up, they both should have known this had gotten completely out of hand. That they should stop before they did something they couldn't take back, but the urge was too strong. Their time apart had caused this eruption. The way Dean's weight felt settled evening atop her body, the way Haley's slender legs felt locked around his hips, as their kiss never came up for air, there was no stopping this hurricane. All loyalty and logical thought had disappeared in the heat of the moment.
Because I miss you love
I miss you love, I miss you love
I miss you Love..
An actual thought never crossed Haley's mind as her hands clawed Dean's tee-shirt up his toned solid back. All she could sense was the pounding of her heart, the feel of Dean's warm smooth lips against her own, his skillful tongue waging war inside her mouth, and the way having him again quieted a need so deep and desperate inside her. A need that had nothing to do with sex, or the heavenly structure of his body, and had everything to do with him, and what he meant to her. Feelings she hadn't been able to express since Jax came home, quite the contrary actually, she had to hide them.
Dean broke from Haley's lips, heart pounding, drunk off her, he nibbled along her skin. Her creamy jaw line, then down on to her neck, every taste, every inch, filling him. Filling a piece of him he had never given to anyone and thought he never would, a piece that she so easily claimed within him. Dean knew right from wrong. Knew blood was thicker then water, but he couldn't stop himself, because Damnit, he loved her.
Haley's head dug deep into the worn in cushion of the couch as her back arched up against Dean lost in ecstasy. A whimpered moan slipped thick and urgent for more out of her mouth as his lips nibbled just below her ear and his hips pushed against her, so she could feel his overpowering excitement for her. Haley's hands roamed the sculpted mountains of Dean's toned back as she felt so lost by the sensation of his smooth pout teasing along her skin, of his warm mouth trapping her in it's confines, of his heart so close to her own.
It wasn't until Dean's hands snaked up her shirt and began pushing it up her body, his mouth trailing his hands every step with succulent kisses did Haley have a rational thought. Who could have known the feel of his warm mouth melting against her belly would bring on logic
It wasn't him who brought on the thought though, not entirely. It was Haley, in that moment realizing how badly she wanted Dean. How desperately she wanted him to never stop. To feel his skin flush against her own, to feel him fill her up with him, make them one. Knowing her true intent, where she really wanted this to go set Haley free and if she was ever going to stop this it had to be now. Another lucid moment wasn't guaranteed with the seducing feel of Dean's kisses and touch, but she knew this wasn't right, not like this.
"Dean wait… Stop." Burst quick and haphazardly off Haley's fumbling lips as her eyes finally shot open.
Dean pulled back from the tempting flesh of her belly, her tee shirt still tangled in his grasp as his emerald eyes pinned her with question from above.
"We can't do this." It pained Haley's heart to say that to him, while the heat in her body couldn't have disagreed more. Untangling her shirt from his grasp, Haley scooted up on the couch.
Seeing that look in her eyes, knowing she wasn't going to let this happen, knowing why she wouldn't, Dean couldn't hold back the spite in his heart. "Because of him?" Dean shot back as he sat back up on the couch. His eye unrelenting upon her. For the first time ever letting himself get mad he was getting the short end of the stick in this arrangement.
That look in Dean's eyes, anger, pain. All of it broke Haley's heart even if she knew she made the right choice. Even if the right choice meant hurting him, the last thing she ever wanted to do. "Because it wouldn't be right." Haley explained an answer she knew he knew in his heart was true.
Dean gazed upon Haley, a woman that every day became more undeniable in his heart and a heated huff escaped his lips. He couldn't believe he was letting her get the best of him like this. Dean Teller never let any woman get the best of him and here she was with him practically on his knees begging her to love him. He had to cut the ties clean, no more dragging this out.
"Tell me we didn't matter. Tell me it was just great sex and I'll never bring it up again." Dean threw back at Haley, something almost begging in his strong tone. Begging for her to let him go, to release him from her hold.
Tears welled up in her torn honey eyes to the pain she knew she was causing him. To the outside world it couldn't be seen, but Haley knew strong guarded Dean to long to not see past his deflective nature. "I can't say that. It's not true. I'd never just sleep with anyone. You know what we did meant something, but you were the one who told me not to fall in love." Her lip quivered with the hard words as her eyes never left his so he could feel her sincerity.
Haley sucked in a deep breath to make herself strong, wanting him to understand, and not just feel cheaply discarded. "I miss you, Dean, I do, and I don't want to hurt you. But I can't do this with you while I'm trying to figure things out with Jax. It's not right. I would never fool around with both of you at the same time. You know I'm not that kind of girl." Despite her best efforts to stay strong Haley found herself growing emotional with the hard, but brutally honest words. Getting it off her chest, knowing it's not what he wanted to hear, Haley rose from the couch. Ready to go into her room and give Dean time to think. Just as she went to step away, Dean rose quickly off the couch, and caught her hand.
Pulling her swiftly to him, Dean wrapped Haley in comforting strong arms that wanted so desperately to never let her go.
"I know you're not that kind of girl. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have put you in that position. I just… I can't stop the way I feel about you." Dean whispered softly upon the crown of her head. Apologizing was never an easy task for him, but for Haley he'd do anything, because as stupid of a move as it was, he ended up falling for her. The very thing he warned her not to do when they first started exploring the new depths of their affection, was the very thing he couldn't stop himself from doing.
Pulling back ever so slightly to find his eyes and hold them with importance, Haley gently corrected him, and his heart that showed her how much he loved her. "We did this together, but I need your help to make sure it doesn't happen again, please Dean." She begged him to stay strong with her as heart breaking as it was knowing it was them that would be left to the waste side.
Don't act like you don't know me
It's still me I never changed
I'll be here when you come back
Stay Here A Little While
I really hate to let this moment go
Touching your skin, and your hair falling slow
When a goodbye kiss, feels like this
Barely forty-eight hours later Haley had a date with Jax. Knowing her like the back of his hand, like another half of himself, he instantly noticed something heavy was weighing on her. In fact he had noticed something had been plaguing her mind since the day he came home. Jax always chalked it up to something she was working through. Something that had nothing to do with him and she'd tell him when she ready.
Seeing her orbs extra stormy when he picked Haley up that sunny afternoon Jax decided to take her away. An escape from whatever was burdening her eyes and heart. Without a word on their destination Jax surprised Haley with a ride through the country, something they had always loved doing when they were younger. Before prison bars had ripped them apart.
Something about the way the wind rushed past their body, something about watching the world fly by in a blur, something about being nestled close together always made everything feel alright even when it wasn't. Jax kept her out in their magical world away from town and her troubles all day. A break here and there to soak up the sun where it burst through the towering tree tops. A moment to catch a deep breath of the untainted country air. A moment to look at each other and remember all the reasons they had been so right together. Reasons that not even time and the space it claimed in-between could wipe clean.
By the time they made it back into town it was already night out. There was no question that Jax would take her back to her place, but he offered to let her crash with him tonight if she wanted to. Haley's hesitancy was easy to detect even if Jax didn't know all the reasons behind it. Knowing that look in her beautiful honey eyes, the one she gave when her heart was torn, Jax promised there'd be no funny business unless she wanted it. That he wasn't coming onto her, but he'd be lying if he said he wanted this night to end.
The honesty and genuine sweet softness to Jax is what ultimately won Haley over. It had gotten to her at fifteen when he first asked her out, it still got to her today.
Here they were in Jax's private room at the clubhouse, where he had been living the past month while he waited to be approved to rent a small house in town. Without cloths to wear to bed Jax offered Haley one of his shirts to sleep in. Something they had done countless times over the years. As she stood next to the bathroom door contemplating her move to exit it's confines, Haley couldn't deny there were butterflies fluttering in her belly. How many times had she spent the night with him, how many times had she worn his over sized tee-shirt to bed, and how many nights had she been his when she did it… countless times and all of them.
The implication of what this meant for them terrified Haley and yet also felt so right somewhere in her heart. A place in her heart where she'd always be Jax's girl.
Haley gnawed nervously on her lower lip as she emerged from the bathroom. Her anxious eyes hit Jax's in a flash from where he laid shirtless sprawled out on his bed, every groove on his toned delirious chest and stomach on display. Haley's weight leaned against the doorframe for a moment as if her feet didn't want to budge.
A slow forming sexy smirk lit up Jax's ridiculously handsome face. A smirk that could always put Haley at ease. "Smokin Hot." He called to her on a low husky drawl.
Haley couldn't hold back the smile that exploded on her face with the comfort Jax could so easily give her. After everything they had been through he always knew what to say, what she was thinking even when her lips didn't move.
Slowly Haley went to him on the bed, like the gentleman he truly was hidden behind his tough exterior, Jax scooted over on his bed to give her room. Keeping his word, no funny business unless it was on her terms.
The two sat there for what felt like hours, talking about the good old days, and moments that still left a tingle in their heart like a lingering residue.
Haley couldn't stop the creeping incline of her heartbeat. The way every minute beside him reminded her a little more of why she loved this man so much. Why she had given herself to him so completely all those years ago, and why now a part of her was dying to go back to that, to them.
With an urge that came from the heart, an action so driven she never even thought it through before it happened, Haley reached out, and softly took Jax's hand into her own. His words stilled suddenly as he turned to her. Something in his baby blues, something that shined with unspoken words of how much he cherished feeling connected to her, being connected to her. That she meant more to him then silly nostalgia and reminiscing. That she meant more to him then he even knew how to say. So instead of board sweeping, soft hearted romantic words that were never Jax's style, a simple smile and joyous laugh escaped his lips.
"What?" Haley questioned him, his laughter contagious like an airborne disease as a charmed smile stole her face and her hand gently squeezed his.
Jax shook his head lightly as if the thought crossing his mind was too good to be true.
His penetrating eyes held her own as he spoke of something that had only been revealed to him as of late.
"Sitting here with you, Us… In this place… I don't know…" Jax shook his head again, his words trailing off as his gaze dropped to the shabby blanket beneath them.
"Tell me," Haley pressed with a soft caring heart and gentle whispered breath. Feeling completely connected to him in that moment. Like he was still that boy who could reach into her soul, only now he was dressed up as a man.
Jax's sterling blue eyes darted back up to Haley's honey brown. Seeing her desire to know what he was going to say. Seeing that look in her eyes that told him he could trust her with anything, Jax surrendered to what he was feeling, to his biggest, most silent dream.
"Part of me feels like you being here when I got home… Like we have a second chance to make it right." His thick gritty breath confessed.
Their eyes held with the weight of his words. Words so heavy the world could have rested securely upon them. Jax still loved her, it was blinding in his eyes, and even tangled up in this crazy mess, Haley had no doubts in that moment she loved him too.
The moment unfolded natural and almost destined, like their first kiss. Jax leaned over slowly without a word, he brushed his lips faintly across her own. Just a taste to see if the look in eyes matched the feel of her heart.
Jax's facial hair tickled against the top of Haley's lip and chin, but it was his lips that melted her like warm butter. Even in a butterfly kiss his mouth felt like heaven against hers, always had.
As soon he felt her lips brush his back Jax felt himself wanting to drown in her, in a need for her too strong to ignore any longer. Quickly their kisses grew longer as his strong arms pulled her closer to him on the bed. Into the security of his arms that had always protected her, arms that wanted to hold her dear until his dying breath. Their lips slipped together moist and hungry with a taste that felt so right in his heart it was undeniable.
Haley loved kissing Jax, it felt like being on fire and soaring through the clouds all at once. She had loved kissing him since the first day this lips brushed her own, but things weren't simple and sweet like they were in those days, not anymore.
As Jax's hands slide along the edges of her figure, as his teeth nibbled on her lower lip, Haley got a sudden frantic urge to stop.
They had kissed before since he had been home, but not on such a sexually available location, and not when what Haley had done with Dean the other night still burned in the back of her mind. It sunk deep and low in her heart. Jax meant too much to her to let things get out of hand when he still didn't know the full truth. She wanted to tell him, she was just too afraid of losing him completely. An anger swelled up inside Haley. Anger at herself for ever getting into a position where she could love two men, and anger at Jax, for making the stupid choice he did that got him sent away from her for all those years and broke them apart. That anger protected her heart from the guilt and shame she felt inside as Haley pulled back, breaking their kiss. "Jax," Her voice snapped a little as Haley untangled from his warm safe grasp and climbed from his bed. Letting her feelings boil over, Haley gave herself a reason to leave. "That's so predictable that you would think you can just say a few touching words and then get into my pants." She shot at him with heated pointed eyes and while he couldn't see under her surface, she was really just ranting at herself.
Jax followed Haley off his bed as his eyebrows furrowed deep with distaste. "You think I just said that to screw you?" He scoffed, throwing their verbal debate right back at her. Insulted she would even insinuate those were his intentions when he had just laid his heart on the line.
Haley's heart pained in her chest, there was no doubt inside he hadn't meant what she was accusing, but inside the part of her that cared so deeply felt urgent to get away. She had let herself get too close. This whole mess was getting more tangled and complicated by the second. From where Haley was standing the only way to put the fire out was to just run away. Run away before she can let her heart and soul give into him the way it was a few minutes ago. Run away before she does something she knows her heart is begging for, but wouldn't be right under the circumstances.
"It's always about what you want, Jax. You're never going to change!" Haley lashed out, trying to push him away, trying to get him to let her go. To get mad at her, because she deserved some sort of punishment after what she had done, for falling in love with his brother as much as she loved him. Frantically Haley moved about the room, avoiding Jax's gaze while gathering her cloths for a quick escape.
Jax didn't know where this was coming from, but something in his heart told him she was trying to protect him, protect them from making a mistake. What mistake, how were they a mistake? Jax didn't know that answer, but he did see through the fight she was staging.
Moving to her, Jax's strong hands fell to her shoulders to hold her steady and catch her attention, but Haley still wouldn't meet his gaze. "Look at me, damnit." He growled low and demanding on his breath, finally giving her the fight from him she wanted.
Let's take it slow, I don't wanna move too fast
I don't wanna just make love, I wanna make love last
When you're on this high, it's a sad goodbye
Heart pounding out of control in her chest, Haley was terrified. This isn't how she wanted this to go. He wasn't suppose to fight for her, but knowing Jax the way she does, Haley knows she shouldn't have been surprised that he did. Reluctantly Haley's eyes rose to meet Jax's baby blues that hung above her, fear looming in her heart. Scared breathless that once their eyes met her will to hold back from him will crumble into the sea.
Jax's thick textured hands slipped from her shoulder, smoothly up her neck until he cupped her cheeks in his palms. He held her gaze with his own and opened his heart to her in a way he'd only ever do with Haley, his love. "You know what I thought about the entire time I was locked up? What kept me going everyday for five years? …You. And I swore to myself if I got the chance, I'd do it all differently. I'd never let what we have go again." Every word bled from Jax's heart and out his eyes, needing her to know what she was to him. His everything, that she was the hope that blinded his mind all those years in prison. She was what got him through life. This wasn't a game for him, this was his whole heart.
Haley's eyes held strong and guarded with his gaze, but inside she was crumbling. Inside he was filling her heart like water fills the lungs when you drown. She saw in that moment that there was no escaping this, what she felt for him, how deeply she loved him. There was no cure for this madness even if she tried, there never had been. In a second Haley gave into him, into the look that felt thick in her heart it was so tangible in their eyes as she leaned up on her tippy-toes and claimed his lips. This wasn't a sweet soft kiss like the first one. This one was demanding and insistent, as if every second they spent apart was killing them more quickly then the last.
Jax held no reservation as his mouth consumed her back. Finally having the girl he had missed to his deepest depths, the girl who'd always be his in his heart. The passion between them like an inferno, so hot to the touch it burned. Five year in the making and a life time of sacred moments were the timber that fueled their flames.
Their hands moved quick and frantic over each other as their gasping breath and hungry kisses filled the room with primal sound.
Needing to feel her, needing it more then he ever thought he could need anything, Jax gripped Haley tight by the waist before plucking her onto his desk, the nearest object. Their lips moved quick as if to devour the other as his hand slipped wildly up her thigh and under his oversized shirt that hung loose over her body. Haley's hands moved just as quick needing Jax as if he was air to breath and she was suffocating without him. Her delicate fingers frantically moved to get his jeans undone as she felt his strong hand yank her panties off her hips.
In that desperate moment they both knew what they needed, what they had to have or they'd combust, explode into a million piece that would scatter across the universe… They needed each other. Everything moved in the blink of an eye as Jax swiftly pulled Haley to the edge of the desk and in one quick movement hooked her leg around his bare hip. In a second as Haley kissed the panting breath from Jax's lips and her hands tangled into his long shaggy hair she felt him plunge deep inside her.
A sharp gasp slipped from Haley as her lower lip quivered against his mouth from the sensation. Haley's finger dug deeper into Jax's scalp as a grunt burst forth from his lips into her mouth with their contact.
Steady, without a movement they stilled like that for a moment, tangled up in each other as if they were one being, as if they had finally returned home. No one had ever felt the way he did inside her, like they were made for each other, meant to be. Jax's big hand gently found her cheek, the way she held him. His lips leaned forward kissing her softly from the heart a few times lost in her grips of heaven before his face pulled back just an inch. Their eyes caught and held in a moment bigger and deeper then words could ever describe. Like when a tsunami crashes onto land, it was powerful and captivating. Finally together again, one entity, where their untamable love could run free and thrive.
Slowly Jax began to rock his hips against her, eliciting muffled whimpers off Haley's lips before she fell against his mouth hungry for his kiss and the taste on her lips.
"The bed," Jax murmured against her moist pout, because this wasn't about screwing her against his desk. When they collided it had been desperate, but now that they came together the frantic feeling gave way as ecstasy filled it's place. Jax gripped Haley's thigh in one hand as his other held steady to the flesh across her back. Her bare legs tangled tightly around him, thighs clenched as Jax carried her carefully over to bed. His feet stumbling with each step from his jeans still tangled at his ankles. They only broke apart for a second as he laid her down in the mattress. Yanking his boots off and kicking his jeans free, Jax's joined her. His toned sculpted body covered Haley's bare creamy flesh like a warm safe blanket.
Their lips came back together, needy but slow and succulent. Haley could see the depths of his undeniable love for her as Jax gazed down into her eyes and pushed himself deeper inside her. Taking Haley so high, she wasn't sure she'd ever come back down.
Smooth and careful, Jax pushed his loose shirt up and off her body. Haley's soft touch pulled him close, until they were together on that old bed where they had first made love all those years ago, skin on skin yet again. Nothing between them, as if all the distance and damage had never happened. As if they were still two kids madly in love. And in that moment while Jax made love to her torturously slow as Haley gave every piece of herself to him it almost felt like no time had passed at all. Like it was still just them, Haley his and Jax hers.
Oh, you feel so perfect, baby
That it feels so perfect, baby
Don't you wanna stay here a little while?
Don't you wanna hold each other tight?
Don't you wanna fall asleep with me tonight?
Don't you wanna stay here a little while?
We can make forever feel this way
Don't you wanna stay?
Maria Mena - "I Miss You Love"
Jason Aldean, "Don't You Wanna Stay"
Note: This story is based on parralleles. My aim is to constantly show both sides of the coin. The coin being Jaxley, Daley. Also in the first chapter I wanted there to be a vagueness concerning Daley and what was really going on between them. While this chapter jumps head first to give a full view on what is going on between them. I tried really hard to keep the Integrity of the characters, because I believe that is vital in maintaining who the characters are but it's always tricky in a triangle situation. Hopefully I met that goal! Also yes this chapter contains an adult scene... I'm always alittle nervous about them because I don't know if they're good or just silly. So hopefully this didn't turn out funny.