I know it's been awhile since I updated but here I am and here it is

this is probably the longest chapter I have written so far so hopefully, it makes up for my long, frustrating absence

btw, since it's been awhile and i know even i forgot some of the details that happened from the last chapter, it might be helpfult to refer back tp the previous update to help understand the beginning of this one

anyway...i really reallly really really REEAALLLLY want to hear what you think about this chpater and the story overall because i spent a super duper amount of time and effort into this and especially this chapter so i really hope you like it and whatever you don't like, tell me so i know what i need ti improve on

and plus, your feedback is my motivation so it would be awesome if you reviewed

Thanks a MILLION! XD XD XD

Disclaimer: What makes you think I own Sailor Moon because I do not anyway anyhow own it

After speaking to Endymion, Sierra didn't feel like returning to the chamber and slap on a heartless smile to greet Rini and Mimi. Instead, Sierra had a strange urge to head to the dungeon and relate all that has happened to Mars. She knew Mars would be disappointed that she wouldn't be leaving the palace until Mimi was cured but Sierra had devised an excuse to free Lady Mars from confinement. So hopefully, it will compensate.

This time around, the guards greeted her kindly and gave her admittance without hustle.

Mars was sitting cross-legged and drawing designs with flames on the cold stone floor. She didn't as much as stop the flying sparks or offer a single salutation. It was left to Sierra to start the conversation.

"I spoke to Endymion," Sierra began.

No answer.

"He promised to leave me alone and to not talk to me and he even said I can leave whenever I want. But Lady Mars, I hope you will understand that I can't leave until my friend Mimi is cured because we don't have the money or the resource. But I have an excuse for them to let you out. We can say that you can help find the other pieces of the Silver Crystal and that you can help me learn who Serenity was. Plus, with Giopiana approaching, we'll need ever sailor scout we can get. No one wants you in here, not even Endymion himself so it won't be hard coaxing them."

Mars had stopped playing with the flames and had listened intently, soaking up every word like it meant the world to her but she didn't say anything when Sierra was done.

"Trust me," Sierra added.

Mars contemplated for awhile and then said, "I'm surprised that you managed it all by yourself, without my help. I'm even more surprised that it was all accidental, all by chance. But you better be out of the palace the moment you friend is better."

Sierra smiled meekly, happy to know that she managed to lift Mars' spirit, even by just a little.

So with that, Sierra left the cell and went looking for one of the sailor scouts to discuss it.

The fact that Giopiana was on the very soil of Crystal Tokyo unnerved Seiya. She was much too close. Moreover, they didn't know when she was going to strike. They had no leads, no spies, and no advantage. Their chance at victory barely existed.

Seiya could tell from the recent scout meeting that was just held, that the person who was most concerned was Endymion. Being king wasn't a walk in the park after all. Especially when all the luxury comes with the stressful price of caring and protecting the lives of his people.

But as Seiya was collecting his thoughts as he strolled through the palace's corridors, he heard a very melodic humming from down the hall. Curious, he sped up his pace until he saw Mimi perched on the window sill of one of the many windows that lined the corridor. It seemed that streaming sunlight and an abundance of oversized windows was the palace's trademark. Ceiling high windows were everywhere and acted as a mean of décor. It's almost as though the palace was completely made of glass, which is probably why from the exterior, the palace seemed to be shimmering, a beacon of light.

Upon seeing Mimi, Seiya felt all of his stress recede. Not only was Mimi a beautiful girl but she was also one of the most loving, kind, and carefree girl in the world and her fragility gives any man the urge to protect her.

"Good afternoon, Mimi," he said. "You seem to be in good spirits."

"How can I not be? This palace is beautiful. Sierra was so lucky to have worked here. Anyone would be enchanted."

"Well, you're here now, aren't you?"

"And I have Sierra to thank for it. I still can't believe I'm really here, in the palace. She's such an amazing friend! I can't thank her enough."

"Sierra is special alright."

But then Mimi gazed thoughtfully down at the garden. "Is it true what they say about her? That's she's Queen Serenity's incarnation? I mean, she told me about it but she refuses to accept it."

"I believe she is and so do many others."

"And yet, she's still so stubborn."

"Are you talking about me?"

They both turned and saw Sierra, hands on her hips, standing swathed in a patch of sunlight. "I am not stubborn."

"You just proved you are," Seiya said.

And they all laughed.

"Where were you?" Mimi then asked. "Rini and I were waiting for you but she got bored of waiting and wandered off."

"I—I had to talk to Sailor Jupiter about something."

Mimi glanced at the watch on her wrist and noticed that it was approaching three o'clock. "Anyway, I have to look for Rini now because I promised that I'd play with her."

She hopped off the ledge but she lost her footing and fell forward. Fortunately, Seiya was quick to catch her before she twisted an ankle. She flushed. "Thank you, Seiya," she said as he brought her down.

When Mimi left and was out of sight, Sierra said, "I may be stubborn but Mimi is clumsy."

"Oh Please, Sierra, Mimi is no clumsier than you are."

Sierra took up Mimi's seat on the ledge and Seiya sat beside her.

"I heard that Serenity was clumsy too," she said quietly.

"Figures, considering you're her reincarnation."

"Why do people keep saying that? Just because I might be her reincarnation doesn't mean I'm the exact—"

"—same person she was" Sierra nodded, Seiya let out a sigh. "Sierra, listen, what you don't understand is that being reincarnated does not been you become an entirely new person. All of you—you're soul, you're personality, you—are made from your experiences from your past lives, whether you consciously know it or not. It's like having amnesia. You were born, woke up with a clean slate but face it, once a state's been written on, you can never entirely scrub away the scribbles. There scribbles will always be there, faintly hovering behind the paint. Sierra, Serenity is you and you are in fact Serenity."

"Seiya, I—"

"Sierra, I know you can't just digest all of this in a single moment but all I'm saying is that it's good to be a little more open-minded. Just trust me, okay?"

She smiled a little. "Alright, Seiya. Whatever you say."

After speaking with Seiya, Sierra spent the rest of the day just wandering through the castle, weaving through the gardens, seeing if anything was going to come back to her.

But she returned to her room that evening as unconvinced as she was this morning.

Mimi was reading by the balcony, the breeze billowing the silk curtains and Sierra suddenly wished her life would her life would be like that of a simple, everyday peasant; like a simple fairytale where she can just live each day dreaming until the man she was destined for arrives to carry her away. She wished that there would be no complications or confusions and that she wouldn't need to doubt if that man truly loved her not. She wouldn't need to worry about the sneers and snickers of others because they'll live in their private little world where they'll have eyes for no one else but each other and he'll make her the happiest girl in the world, blessing her with kisses and tickle her with the sweetest words she'll ache to hear.

But instead, she was here, stuck and lost in reality.

"Evening," Mimi chirped, "where were you all day?"

Sierra crumbled onto the bed and sighed. "Around."

"Frustrated now, aren't you? It's Endymion, isn't it?"

Sierra snapped up. "How did you know?"

"As a friend, things like these are pretty obvious."

"Mimi, have you ever wished or thought that there was something more to this world, that there is something or someone out there waiting for you?"

Mimi gave a sympathetic smile and walked over to the bed to join Sierra. "All the time."

Sierra nodded absent-mindedly as she stared out the window and felt along the bed for a pillow until she finally caught hold of a cushion and enveloped it in her embrace and brought her knees to her chest, finding a safe haven in her own little bubble.

"Sierra, you have to stop feeling sorry for yourself. There are lots of other people who are suffering even more than you are, who have the misfortune of being overlooked by the person they desperately like. I mean I—"

Sierra turned her head toward Mimi and raised her eyebrow. "Mimi, is there something wrong? Is there something you should tell me?"

"N-nothing. I just wanted to tell you that you should be more open-minded, that you're not the only person in the world whose life actually matters."

Sierra laid a hand on Mimi's wrist. "Mimi, I'm sorry. I know I'm selfish and I really don't want to be like this but everything—this castle, Endymion, the scouts—they're all driving me crazy. Seiya told me to be more open-minded as well this morning and I'm trying to be. Mimi, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

Mimi smiled slightly and placed her hand atop of Sierra's. "No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. You deserve to vent. Everyone does. After all, that's what I'm here for."

Just then, there was a rasp at the door and Mimi sprang up to open it. Seiya stood there waiting with a cloak draped over his arm.

He flashed done of his dashing smiles and handed Mimi the cloak. "I know it's going to be chilly tonight so I wanted to give you this. After all, because you're ill, you have to be extra careful."

Sierra arched her brow and made her way to Mimi's side at the door. Mimi stood staring at him speechless and dumbfounded while Sierra tried searching Seiya's face.

"Goodnight," he finally said to the both of them before turning away.

Sierra shut the door as they returned to the bed. Mimi sat there stroking the soft fur the lined the cloak, a faraway look in her eyes and seeing so, Sierra decided to gently tugged the fabric away.

"Well…I'm guessing there's something you want to tell me?"

Like a childhood who lost her toy, Mimi looked longing at the cloak in Sierra's arms and finally tiled her head to the side and sighed. "You already know what I'm going to say."

"But when?"

"I don't know. How would you answer me if I asked you when you fell hopelessly in love with Endymion?" She looked toward the balcony doors. "It feels like I've loved him my entire life."

"Does—does Seiya know?"

Mimi gave Sierra a sad look but Sierra just couldn't shake the notion that perhaps there was a hint of resentment that whispered behind those big puppy dog eyes. "He's too busy chasing after you."

Sierra was taken aback. "That isn't true. He sees me as no more than a sister as I see him as brother. He cares for me only because he thinks I can help Crystal Tokyo or something like that. But I see how he looks at you, hear how he talks about you. I mean, he just brought over a cloak for you at this late at night. For you, not me."

Mimi scoffed heartlessly and walked to the window. "Sierra, honestly, you're just so blind. So naïve. Didn't anyone tell you? Seiya was in love with Serenity."

Sweaty.

And sticky.

And dizzy.

Sierra woke up the next morning with the sun pinching her eyes and still swimming and aching from her dreams from last night.

It all rushed at her and tugged at her and stepped on her and mocked her.

She sat up. Slowly. Her head feeling like a brick, her body beaten.

She saw herself playing catch with Rini and drawing with her and taking her out to the gardens and to the outskirts of Crystal Tokyo where the enchanting forests and swamps lived. She saw herself laughing with the Sailor scouts and walking arm in arm with Mars through store in downtown Crystal Tokyo. And then he saw herself, felt herself being doted upon by Endymion. Running away to the waterfall by a lake she had never before seen in her life and splashing each other silly and dancing and laughing and whispering until daylight was squeezed dry out of the sky and they resorted to simply staring at the stars for the rest of the night. She felt the strength of his arms, his lips, and his obsession as he kissed her, overwhelmed her, controlled her. She shuddered when he trailed his mouth from hers to the edge of her lips to her jaw line, and pulling his lips down her neck to her collarbone and staying there a moment too long. But then she saw herself being ripped away with a pain that blossomed from her core and tunnelled its way through her veins, coiling itself around her every inch, every tissue of her body and her soul. She had felt herself dying, tumbling into the great abyss.

As she massaged the grogginess out of her eyes, everything came back to her. All her memories from every past and she understood at last.

Rushing out of her room, she wanted to desperately tell someone that she remembered. Especially Endymion. She ran down the corridor, a wide, beaming smile plastered onto her face with her night gown bundled in her fists, nearly clashing with the palace employees.

When she was out of breath, she leaned against one of the windows to steady herself.

Looking outside, she saw Mimi and Rini planting and watering the flowers in the garden with laughter and smiles floating in the atmosphere. Sierra had the urge to barge outside and tell them everything but then, what Seiya and Mimi said suddenly drifted back to her. Everything shouldn't be just about her. Why should people be bothered by her, fuss over her? And so, she decided that she didn't want to disturb them and she'd rather let them be happy the way they are.

Wandering the palace and collecting her thoughts, Sierra agreed that she was indeed infringing on other people's business. She realized how happy everyone is without her. Endymion wouldn't have to be confused and torn, Mars wouldn't need to be jealous and bitter and everyone else can just move on with life instead of worrying about her. And now she realized that even if she happened to have all of her memories surge back to her, she was still no help to Crystal Tokyo because the memories that flooded back were just like visions, scenes out of a movie. It was more like she was watching herself as a character in a play. She couldn't remember her any of her thoughts or her secrets, let alone the whereabouts of the Crystal. Everything was still fuzzy.

Unhitching herself from the ledge, Sierra continued down the long and wide sunny corridor, letting it take her to wherever it ended.

After walking for what seemed like fifteen minutes, the palace was still quite dead silent, the only noise she could make out were the faint whistling of birds outside. But she found herself confronted by a narrow but tall wooden door with carvings crawling up its face. She recognized this door though: it lead up a flight of some 500 steps to one of the many towers that guarded the palace. Tired and uninterested, she pressed her back against the door and dropped herself onto the cold marble floor, letting her eyelids fall while her face soaked up the sunlight that streamed from the windows on the other side of the corridor. It was quite soothing just sitting there, curled up against the door and thinking about absolutely nothing. This was what she defined as peace. But then she lifted her eyelids again and watched the clouds sail through the blue and the wind caressing the tree branches. It just felt like one of those days when you didn't feel like doing anything…your arms feel as flimsy as jelly and well, you just felt like a sweet pile of mush.

But Sierra soon managed to roll her head, adjusting her view of the sky from left to right until she caught a glimpse of the door from the corner of her eye. The pattern that entwined the door truly was beautiful, each stroke and curve was filled with strength and life, dancing and spinning in an exotic language. From where the door kissed the floor, Sierra used her finger to trace the pattern up and around until she could no longer stand on her tippy toes to continue to follow it path. Suddenly exhilarated and drunk with laughter from her childishness, Sierra decided to climb up the flight of stairs up to the tower. Turning the brass knob, Sierra pushed the door opened and as the door creaked, the candles along the stone wall lining the winding staircase lit up one by one, all the way up. Timidly, Sierra took the stone steps one at time. As she climbed the spiralling staircase, there was a window after every so floor and a mini balcony after every two floors or so. After about the fourth floor, she was already huffing and buffing and dizzy and so, she shuffled her way to the nearby balcony on the side and leaned against the edge. The breeze was such a pleasure and a relief on her sticky forehead that Sierra let out a sigh.

But off somewhere in the distance, she heard shouting and grunting and talking.

Turning her head, she saw the vast back field of the palace the stretched off toward the silhouetted mountains in the distance. In the middle of the field, rows and rows of soldiers stood training and among them, was Endymion, with his shirt off because of training and the heat. He weaved through the practicing soldiers with his hands behind his back, nodding at some in approval and stopping to correct others.

Leaning forward against the stone balcony, she rested her chin in her palm and gazed down onto the vast field where they were training. She watched as Endymion went up and down the rows of training soldiers and correcting their form and technique. Often, he executed demonstrations where he performed the attack move flawlessly. He would yell and punish but at times he would also laugh and clap and pat the soldiers for a job well done. He was like a father, a brother, a friend. Here, on the field, he was a true leader, teaching his people with utmost attentiveness and patience. He made it his duty to work them to perfection. He exhibited how much he cared and loved and valued his people and his country. He got down and dirty, doing everything himself and did whatever it took to connect with men, to understand them. Here, Sierra thought, Endymion was truly a king and a warrior with all his power and control. Here, he wasn't made weak by palace drama and women. Here, Sierra could tell that Endymion was truly happy and free.

From afar, she tried to study his stern and focused face, the contours of his taut muscles, his tan skin, his broad shoulders, how the wind often whisked his dark hair into his steady eyes, and how his velvet voice would boom over all the others.

Sierra tilted her head and smiled and silently wished the best for all the soldiers on their training.

It was then the heavens began to rumble and when Sierra looked up, the clouds deepened to a menacing shade of grey, swirling around and over each other.

The first drops of rain fell and Sierra felt it splash on the tip of her nose. Looking back out to the field, she saw the soldiers still painstaking practicing, almost as if they were completely oblivious to the oncoming storm.

She managed to linger on the balcony a moment longer just to see the water pour down in sheets and the soldiers training on dense and slippery mud. Endymion continued, unflinchingly, making his rounds and surveying the troops.

Defeated, Sierra ducked back under the awning of the stone doorway and watched the sky leak.

She wanted so badly to run back down the tower and fetch an umbrella to invite Endymion and the troops inside because at this rate, they were all going to get sick and what good would that be if Giopiana happens to show up at this time?

But then again, all Endymion wants to do is prepare them for anything that might happen.

What was once a light breeze a moment ago iced over into a bitter cold that began biting into her nose and cheeks. With nothing but a thin cotton night gown on, Sierra retreated back deeper into the dark, stone depths of the tower where the candles along the walls radiated some sort of warmth.

But turning, she was startled to see a figure loom out from the darkness.

"Lady Mars," Sierra said breathlessly, "you're free."

"Of course I'm free. After all, that was the plan."

"Yes, of course."

A silence lengthened between them until Mars inched closer. "You're probably expecting me to thank you."

Sierra avoided her eyes and ducked her head.

"Don't think because you spoke to Jupiter that I'm supposed to owe you for helping me get out of the cell. I don't owe you anything, not in this lifetime or the last because for all I know, you are the one in debt to me, always showing up out of nowhere and taking what's mine. The only reason they returned my throne to me is that I assured them that I knew of Giopiana's whereabouts, that I knew how to defeat her. You had nothing to do with it. Nothing. So stop standing here acting all high and mighty and pitiful. It downright sickens me."

Annoyed and hurt, Sierra attempted to swerve past Mars and make a dash down the stairs but Mars moved to block her escape.

"I make the rules here."

Sierra crossed her arms and leaned against the arched doorway to the balcony, waiting for Mars to leave her alone.

Mars on the other hand, caught sight of what was going on outside and moved out toward the balcony despite the rain.

"Endymion," she said almost to herself. "You were watching him, weren't you?"

The rain was still gushing but Sierra still drove through it to stand next to Mars and gaze down toward the field. Endymion was ordering the troops to head back inside, he being the last one to return indoors, making sure everyone was good to go.

Still being pummelled by the rain and staring out onto an empty field, they resumed their conversation.

"How did you enjoy your dreams last night?"

Feeling as if she'd been cheated and having something viciously ripped from her, Sierra snapped her head toward Mars to see a nasty smirk spread across her face.

"I understand the visions you had were quite vivid."

"How did you—"

"Tell me, Sierra, do you believe you're Serenity's reincarnation?"

"I—I don't know."

"Well then, let me tell you—you're not. That's right, what everyone's been feeding you, setting you up for, it's all a lie."

"Mars, I know you never liked me but-"

"True, but I know much, much more that you do."

"But those dreams…"

"Sierra let me tell you something—Serenity, the real Serenity is somewhere here, in this very castle, and she knows it. She knows everything: the memories, the crystal…I told her to put those memories into your mind, give you those dreams."

"But why?"

"I want to show you that what I give to you, what you I have, I can easily take away. I want to show you who's in control. Did you wonder why those images seemed so foreign, so fuzzy, so out of reach? Because they're not yours, sweetheart. That sweet mystical connection you think you have with Endymion is nothing but an overwhelming crush that every hopeless girl has for him, thinking that they're special, that they were meant to be. It's all a mind game."

"You're lying."

"Oh? Just wait until tomorrow and you'll find out whether I'm lying or not. If it weren't for your face and the sweet idea of you being the reincarnation, no one in the palace—Seiya, Rini, Endymion—will give a darn about you. Just remember you're nothing without Serenity."

As Mars stalked out of the balcony, Sierra saw her figure blend in with the rushing rain, disappearing into the dark hole of the tower, gone, just like that, just as the images from her dream were then suddenly slipping from her mind, covered upon layer after layer of chalky dust.

Sierra left the palace for a walk through downtown.

Rain still drizzled down, streaming onto the streets and night was falling fast. Cars whooshed by, rushing to get wherever they needed to go, off the streets and back home and streetlamps flickered on slowly, and with no one on the streets, the uniform beacon of lights gave the roads an eerie feeling.

She felt herself being watched but she still walked as fast as she could, shoes flapping hard onto the concrete of the sidewalk.

And without an umbrella.

She needed to think to be alone and the buzzing noise of the rain and the wetness and the cold some reason made concentration so much easier.

But no matter how hard she dug into the recesses of her mind, her dream from the other night could not be drawn up. She didn't even know what she was looking for in her mind anymore because there was absolutely no recollection. It all vanished.

Completely.

She just knew she was looking for some kind of memory. Something. Anything.

It's like she's trying to grab hold of something she knows is there but is hiding, deliberately inching away from her reach.

But instead of searching, her mind soon wandered off to what Mars said, her words ringing through her mind.

She just felt like trash.

The palace is in chaos because of Giopiana and finding Serenity. Mimi is sick. Mars has gone nearly insane because of jealously. The people are oblivious and in danger. And she's here, head churning because she's starting to question her existence and purpose in the world.

She's just so tired that she just wants to give up; everything seems drained of meaning, pointless, painful.

Eventually, after a half hour of aimless walking, she reached Mimi's little cottage, the very place where Mimi took her in and where Endymion had helped her with her injured ankle.

Exhausted and relieved, Sierra ran toward the gates of the front yard only to find them locked. In a state of helplessness, Sierra began to shake the metal gate, rattling it, venting out her frustrations, and eventually, she even kicked it.

Hard.

That was when the gates suddenly swung opened and she walked through them, onto the pathway that snaked through the perfect lawn.

Sierra let a sneeze rock her. The gloomy weather was seeping into her and she finally started to feel the water coating her body, matting her hair against her scalp and her face.

She just wanted to fall to the ground and stay there.

Dragging her feet toward the front door, she noticed someone in the yard.

Panicked, Sierra jumped and turned to see old Mr. Hiyoto, who was probably in his late eighties smile and give a polite nod.

Mr Hiyoto was Mimi's neighbour who Mimi often invited over for tea since he was a lonely man without any kids, and yet, always so happy.

Sierra noticed that Mr. Hiyoto was holding a rake a little too big for his body and he was raking up the fallen leaves in Mimi's yard.

She went over to him and wanted to tell him to go back home because he was bound to get sick in the rain.

But he said when she reached him puzzled her.

"I'm sorry," he said, "terribly sorry. This is all I can do for dear Mimi."

Sierra cocked her head to the side and gave him a respectful smile when she asked, "Mr. Hiyoto, why are you sorry? We should be sorry for having you take care of our house while we aren't here. I didn't know Mimi had left you with this job."

Mr. Hiyoto shook his head. "Oh dear, perhaps news never reached the palace to reach your ears."

"Mr. Hiyoto, I beg you, please explain, I really don't understand what you're saying."

"Sierra dear, Mimi is dead."

Her back straightened and her eyes widened. "What do you mean? She's at the palace, nurturing her illness."

"Her heart failed her two weeks ago and she was brought to the hospital but nothing could be done by then. No family members could be contacted but they found a will saying she wished to donate her organs. Having no direct relation to her, I just had to watch all this: watch as they took that beautiful soul away. She's gone, Sierra. I thought you knew. They said they tried contacting all her friends and family."

Shaking her head back and forth, continuously for who knows how long, the old didn't know what else to do but watch and help to support Sierra from falling over.

She hadn't eaten the entire day.

In disbelief and utter confusion, Sierra dropped to the ground, her knees knocking on the pavement, splashing rain water up around her, and buried her face in her hands and screamed.

So tell me what you think! XD