.

Kakashi stared, frozen in shock at the teenage girl wrapped between his sheets. This could not be happening, was his first thought. Then, this has to be some mistake, there's an explanation for this, was his second.

Perhaps he'd offered to take her home? Which meant he was the one that lured her there… No, even while drunk, he couldn't see himself doing that. Or maybe she followed him in her quest to annoy him further… and for some reason they'd just decided that jumping into bed together happened to be the thing to do? Well if he was really, really drunk then maybe…

No, he still couldn't believe that'd he go that far. But he was a lightweight… Kakashi fisted a handful of hair while squeezing his eyes shut in a frustrated attempt to remember, something.

Unfortunately there was one very easy way to tell just how far things had gone; Kakashi lifted his blanket and looked down. With a sigh of relief, he saw that though most of his cloths were gone, his favorite shurikan patterned boxers were still properly and securely in place. Thank god for small miracles he supposed. Maybe he had been too drunk to do anything. Never thought he'd be thankful for that situation. But there was still someone else he needed to check.

He then peaked over to Ino, feeling every inch the dirty old pervert by doing so. At first he frowned, not sure what it was he was seeing, and then his eyes widened in realization. Ino was wearing his shirt. Now how did that happen? But as his eye traveled lower he couldn't help but stare at the pale, bare thigh that extended from beneath the girl's makeshift nighty, down to her perfectly shaped calves, and small delicate feet. Groaning, Kakashi dropped the blanket and resigned himself to the fate that he was definitely going to hell.

It was time to face facts. He liked Ino as a person in general. She had been on his mind that night, thanks to her incessant prodding. And when he allowed to his mind to travel there, he did have to admit she was a very pretty girl, not that he'd ever really paid it mind before. Now all this on its own was perfectly innocent, but when you added in large amounts of alcohol and the girl's apparent willingness, you had the perfect formula for a rather disastrous one night stand.

Shit.

The girl shifted beside him and stretched with a sigh. Blue eyes slowly blinked open, staring at the ceiling. Her brow furrowed, likely trying to piece together where exactly she was. Well, it was time to get some answers, he supposed. Clearing his throat, Kakashi gave the girl an awkward half smile. "Morning."

When Ino opened her eyes, the first thing she realized was that this wasn't her bed. The second was that her head was pounding and she felt incredibly thirsty. Well the drinking explained that, but then where the hell was she?

A noise to her side caused her head to turn. Oh no, she thought with growing trepidation, she had finally become, one of those girls. She'd always figured nights like this would occur, but she wasn't counting on them being quite so soon. She was only sixteen after all. Just hopefully it wasn't one of her friends. She'd never be able to live that down if it was. Oh, maybe it was that cute special J she'd been eyeing the whole evening. She certainly wouldn't mind waking up next to that in the morning.

Two blue eyes met one black one and a scared, uncovered face. Grey hair, completely naked to where the blankets pooled at his waist, rueful smile… Ino gasped as the realization hit and jerked back so quickly in shock, that she didn't realize quite where the bed ended and floor began.

Kakashi cringed as he watched he girl tumble in a tangle of blankets from the bed. Well that certainly was a new reaction for him. "I know I'm a scary sight in the morning but surely it's not that bad," he called, watching as the girls mouth opened and closed a few times.

"I- you- how? This can't be real," she said from her awkward position on the floor.

Kakashi frowned. Maybe he wouldn't be getting any answers after all. "You don't remember?"

Ino's eyes widened. "No!" she cried and then stood up. Kakashi looked away as his shirt just barely left her decent. The girl seemed to realize this at the same time and while turning a bright shade of red, got back into the bed, if only to pull the covers securely around her waist. "I'm wearing your shirt?"

Kakashi shrugged, not really sure what to do anymore. He'd been hoping she'd be able to tell him how this all came about.

"Where are my cloths?"

Again he shrugged, though this time with a hint of mirth.

"Why am I not wearing my clothes?" she asked in a much tighter voice.

The man sighed. It would be like Ino to actually not find the humor in a situation when it was probably the best response. "Honestly, I don't remember, but I can make an educated guess."

"An educated guess…" the girl echoed dully, staring forward. She then surprised him by turning swiftly and smacking him hard in the shoulder. "You depraved old letch!" she screeched. "How could you? I'm practically a child!"

No, this was not going well.

"Excuse me," he said while rubbing his arm. "But there are two of us in this bed, and I am not in the habit of carrying away unwilling, adolescent girls."

"So you admit it," Ino continued in a frantic rush. "You seduced me. You, you… old man!"

Kakashi surveyed the girl calmly. Despite everything, he was finding it a bit much that Ino felt fit to place all the blame on him. It wasn't like he'd intended any of this and if anything; she was the one pursuing him most of the night. "I did not, and I'm not old."

"You have grey hair!"

"It's silver, and I did not seduce you. If you want to play the blame game, I can just as easily insinuate the same to you."

"Silver is white, not grey. And me? Ha! You're the creepy voyeur." Ino crossed her arms triumphantly. "Face it. You just couldn't control yourself when faced with my young, innocent, tight body, wrapped around yours. Pervert."

Young, innocent, tight… Kakashi's mouth went dry. Did she realize what she was- He shook his head to clear of the mental image she had just inadvertently given him. Two could play that game. "Is too, and you're the hormonal nymph, desperate for your superior's attention and thinking sex gives you power." Ino's hand twitched. "Face it, you just wanted to find out what it was like to be with a real man for once, rather then those boys you're used to."

If he hadn't just witnessed it, Kakashi would've sworn that it was not possible for the human face to undergo that many shades of red in a single instant, but there you had it, and Ino looked about ready to burst with indignation.

"How dare you insinuate-" she seethed furiously. "You don't know anything about me, and if you did, then you'd know how far from the truth that really is."

At that, Kakashi felt his whole body go cold. How far from the truth… Oh no… she wasn't, was she? Had he? This couldn't be happening... He lowered his voice to a soft, sympathetic whisper. "You weren't a virgin, were you?" The horror he felt at that prospect was making his stomach sick. He really was a bastard if that was the case. He could only hope that maybe they had Icha Icha in hell.

Ino blinked in surprise and then felt her anger double over once more. How dare he! "Are you seriously asking me that? Now, after everything that's happened?" As if waking up next to one of their sensei's wasn't bad enough, but to act so nonchalantly about the possibility of taking her virginity! Oh, she could just kill him.

"Well, I don't know," he answered, feeling how very much in unfamiliar territory he was. "You're the one going on about how young you are." Internally, he braced himself for her answer, not sure whether she was just trying to put up a bold front or not. He'd never be able to forgive himself if that where the case.

"Wait, you're hoping I was, aren't you?" she declared suddenly as a new idea came rushing through her mind. "That's your whole thing isn't it? You suck at this, so you were hoping I wouldn't know any better!"

What?

"Oh, you really are a piece of work, sensei," she empathized deliberately.

"Ino, would you stop trying to blame this whole thing on me and just give me a straight answer? Were you or weren't you a virgin?"

"And why do you- oh god!" She looked over at him with wide eyes. "Were you?"

Did she just ask…?

"Of course not," he exasperated, wondering at the oddity that was Ino's mind.

"Oh don't sound so offended. As if everyone doesn't know how repressed you are. No man would read as much smut as you do if you were actually getting some regularly."

Kakashi scowled. As if an appreciation for good literature had anything to do with it. "Quite frankly, that's none of your business."

"Pfft, after last night? I think so. How do I know this isn't a weekly occurrence for you? Maybe you didn't want my help because in secret you're like the town pogo stick, everyone gets a ride."

So, one minute he's repressed and next he's a man slut… and did she just compare him to a pogo stick? "Ino, you're being ridiculous"

"God, you must really suck in bed if you think going after teens will make you look better," she continued on, lost in her own world.

"I do not suck," he answered, taken slightly aback, though he wasn't exactly sure why he felt the need to defend himself against her accusations.

Ino snorted derisively. "Well I certainly don't remember it being particularly good."

"You don't remember anything at all!"

"And you like that fact, don't you?" she snapped.

The pounding in his head was not going anywhere anytime soon. "Ino…"

"You got to spend the night pounding me into the mattress-" Kakashi froze. "Plowing me like a corn field and yes, the golden imagery is intentional-" Felt his hand twitch slightly along with something else. "Yet after all th-"

"Ino, enough!" Kakashi cut in, feeling his face grow hot. It was best to stop her before the girl went through an entire dictionary of terms, which he then had no choice but to visualize. "I honestly don't remember anymore about last night than you do. Look, I realize you're upset. Probably more at yourself than at me, however-"

"Upset at myself?" She waved her hand flippantly. "You certainly have a high opinion of yourself… or low one, depending on your meaning."

"However, if you're going to drink like an adult then you also have to take the responsibility for your actions like one too."

"Oh that's rich," she answered quickly. "Coming from the man that got to reap all the benefits from it."

"What benefits?" he snapped in a slightly raised voice. "I told you, I don't remember anything."

"But I bet you would've liked to," she smirked while twisting her body towards him, allowing her loose hair to fall enticingly over her shoulder.

Kakashi buried his head in his hands before looking up to the ceiling as though it could give him some sort of divine guidance. Was there even a way to answer that wouldn't set the girl off on him again? His ears were then cursed with the sound of rustling fabric. When his eye drifted over, he quickly shut it and turned away.

"Ino, put your shirt back on." What the hell was she playing at now?

She grinned and tossed it across the room. "It's not my shirt."

"I don't care. Just put it back on."

Never again, he thought desperately. Never, no matter what it cost him, would he drink in the presence of self assured, teenage girls. They were too dangerous.

"Oh please, it's not like you haven't seen them before."

"That's not the point," he bit out, still with his head stubbornly turned.

"And if you were half as good as you claim, then you did a hell of a lot more than just look at them last night."

The man groaned as he was hit with yet another mental image of just that. "Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?" She asked then paused as her irritation got the better of her while he continued to look stubbornly away. "Oh, for crying out loud, the wall isn't that interesting. Just fucking look at me already."

He wasn't sure if it was the frustration in her voice, or the strong use of language, but Kakashi found his body turning to face the girl. He meant to scowl furiously but he, like most men, found that difficult when faced with an unexpected pair of perfectly formed breasts, presented so willingly before him.

"Ino?"

She smirked triumphantly. "Yes?"

"Please put the shirt back on."

"Hey, Kakashi?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm up here."

Kakashi winced. "Just do it."

"Perv."

The pounding continued. "You're the one that's stripping! And for no reason other than to torment me."

"Oh you do think highly of yourself, don't you? Actually, I got rid of it because I find it hard to sleep in clothing and it's still only 8 o'clock. I intend to get at least three more hours of sleep in before getting up after a night of drinking."

Kakashi blinked. "You can't be serious." Absolutely nothing she said would convince him that this was anything but deliberate teasing.

She shrugged in response.

"You're a tease," he stated bluntly and meaning every connotation of it.

Ino practically glowed. "Does that mean you like what you see?"

He wasn't going to hell, Kakashi realized suddenly, staring at the young nymph in his bed. He was already there.

.

.

Across town, Sakura awoke with one of the worst hangovers of her life. With a curse, she managed to stumble her way to the washroom and the promptly empty the remaining content of her stomach into the bowl.

God, how much did I drink? She asked her pale reflection. She felt like hell and looked it too. This was all Ino's fault, she thought, ruefully. Her and her martini list! They had gotten so drunk, and then…

Holy shit!

Sakura's heart pounded in her chest as her breath came in quickened bursts. She was dead. She, Sakura Haruno, was one dead kunoichi. And they were going to kill her when they figured it out.

.