Whoever said facing what hurts you will make you stronger is full of shit. I thought I would be ok watching RAW and seeing Randy only a few days after everything had happened. Man I had thought wrong. I was fine all the way up until his and John's match. John came out first and I noticed he wasn't looking to good. He had dark bags under his eyes but you could see the make up that was trying to cover them up. I tensed as I waited for his music to hit. Once It did I found myself wanting to turn away from the screen. But I forced myself to look as out stepped Randy. He looked different, meaner then he had before. I watched as he got into the ring with no emotion on his face. Which wasn't like randy. Once he locked up with john I felt the tears on my face. I couldn't help it.
I was in love with him and yet that meant nothing to him. He didn't care that everyone in the locker room knew about us having sex or that I was a virgin. Something that was meant for me and him like he had promised was now all over the WWF. He was being really hard on John tonight. Not pulling back any of his punches or kicks. I wondered if it was because of me. I know I shouldn't have told him I didn't love him, but maybe I was trying to hurt him like he hurt me. I had given him everything I had and now I was left with nothing. I gasped as I saw the blood running down John's head. I couldn't take it anymore. Turning off the TV I didn't know what to do.
One thing I really missed about being on the road was there was always something to do. It didn't matter what you did, there was never a boring moment. I opened my phone to see a picture of me and Randy kissing. I hadn't been able to change it yet because I think I was hoping it was all a bad dream. That everything with us was ok. But in my heart I knew it wasn't. I just looked at it, not being able to take my eyes off of it. I pressed the text button and sent a quick text to John " You ok?" something simple. " Yeah Jay. Orton is just working some things out." He replied. I knew John to well to know that meant that he was pissed at Orton and it wasn't planned what had happened.
" I'm sorry John" I sent as I scrolled through my contacts I saw Randy's. Another thing I couldn't delete yet. I almost called it, I would have if John hadn't texted me back. " Why are you Sorry?" I didn't know what to say to that. So I didn't reply. Instead I went upstairs and pulled on a John cena shirt before going into the mirror and taking a funny picture for him. I sent it before I looked in my closet. Under Neath a few things I saw my RKO tank top. Now that wouldn't have been so bad, except right next to it was one of Randy's shirts. It must have gotten into my bag.
I walked over and picked it up, smelling it slightly. I noticed how much it smelled of Randy and it broke my heart. I missed sleeping next to him and smelling that smell. The phone beeped showing I had a new picture message. I opened it and it was John in the locker room. He had taken a sharpie and wrote " Jay's Teddy Bear Of Love" Across his chest which mad me smile. In the corner of the picture I could see Randy, he was looking at something in his hands. Probably a ring rat's phone number. I grabbed the shirt off the floor before climbing into bed and snuggling with the shirt.
John's POV:
I knew sending that picture to Jay would make her smile. I hope it did at least. I looked back at Randy who was holding something, a picture. I walked over to him grabbing my shirt "What's that?" I asked standing over his shoulder. Randy looked up at me and held out the picture. It was of him and Jay on the beach in Australia. It had been the day all of us had hung out. His arm was around her waist and they were both smiling. I smiled at the picture before looking at him. "You talked to her?" I asked. Randy tensed up which by my guess was a yes to the answer. "She left me a voice mail, I need a drink" And he walked out leaving me in the locker room holding the photo in my hand. I knew I should go after him but I also knew he needed his space too. I just hoped whatever he did wouldn't get him into trouble.
Randy's POV:
I couldn't stand it anymore, everything reminded me of Jayden and it was driving me crazy. I hated the fact that I would call her and hang up, but I just needed to hear her voice. I was over the crap of being alone. I wanted her back but I didn't know how to get her back. John wasn't helping me out at all. "If she wants to talk she will call you" Bull shit he was trying to feed me. I didn't need to wait for her to come to me; I would go to her if I had to. I found myself back in my hotel room. I didn't even shower; I just walked to my computer and logged on. I saw that she was online so I took the time I had, writing it out to her,
RKO_4_Life: Jayden I know you don't want to talk to me. But I need you, I know I shouldn't have told John all that shit but I did and I am sorry, I feel like I am going crazy with out you baby. Please talk to me. I know you love me, because every time we touched I felt a spark and I know you felt it to. Please?
I hit send and waited for her to write me back. As I waited I grabbed a tank top she had left at my house.
Normal POV:
I saw the im pop up and half I was happy while the hurt was hurt and mad as hell. I read the message quickly before writing back
Evil Angel: It doesn't matter how I feel. Leave me alone Randy.
I sent it before logging off. I couldn't deal with this anymore.