DHMB: Yup, another day, another chapter. I must apologize to all in advance. When I uploaded the chapter it took out almost ALL of the punctuation. T-T I tried to go back and fix it but,
I'm human. I may have missed something. The uploader seems to be sooooooo glitchy! Has anyone else noticed this? Seriously! WTF! ARGGHHH! -bangs head against keyboard- Anyway...onward!

"Wow, Lulu!" Felina said, "Where did you get that robe?" Lulu wore a long deep red robe with tight sleeves and a flowing skirt.

"My Sugar Daddy got it for me," the silver haired girl declared.

"The necklace too?" Clara asked, admiring the diamond web necklace.

"Yup!" Lulu said. "He takes such good care of me."

"Who's your sugar daddy?" Brittney Anistona asked.

"Lucius Malfoy," Lulu said.

213. Lucius Malfoy is not my "sugar daddy" and I will not claim he is.

"WHAT?" Draco cried, looking at the older girl horrified.

214. -That goes double when Draco Malfoy is within earshot.

Felina smirked as she made her way towards her detention with Lupin. As she made her way down the hall, she knocked over suits of armor and students were made to dive out of her way or drop to the ground and crawl under her. She got to the classroom door way, but was having a bit of trouble getting through the door. She moved back a bit, ran a few steps and threw her weight against the door. She sprang free on the other side but she had too much momentum to stop and bounced around the class room, knocking over shelves, desks, artifacts and other miscellaneous knick knacks scattered about the class room. Professor Lupin rushed out of his office at the noise and stared around in shock. Felina smiled at him from the other side of her bubble barrier.

217. I will not levitate anywhere in a big pink bubble.

"Hey, Professor," Jael called as she waltzed into detention. Snape didn't even glance up from his grading as he motioned towards a stack of dirty cauldrons. Jael waved her wand towards them and they immediately began scrubbing themselves. Snape glanced up and sighed.

"Ms. Gibran, you are supposed to clean those by hand," he said.

"You didn't specify that," Jael commented. "Oh, guess what I did?"

"I shudder to think and should most likely not inquire, but what?" Snape asked.

"I got a bunch of sugar quills and gave them out to all the firsties and sent them to class, then I went in the Gryffindor common room and replaced all their quills with them and then I replaced all of Dumbledore's quills with them and then.."

"Ms. Gibran!"

218. My professors have neither the time, nor the inclination to hear about what I did with six boxes of Sugar Quills.

Felina, Jael and Lulu sat outside near the entrance, relaxing. Felina looked down at herself.

"I'm hungry," she said.

"I'm sorry," Lulu replied.

"Ima eat your tie!" Felina declared, tackling Lulu.

"AH! GET OFF!" Lulu cried as Felina began to chew on her friends tie.

"Ms. Accius!" Snape called as he emerged from within the castle.

219. No part of the school uniform is edible.

Lulu ran down the hall, screaming. Professor Snape grabbed the girl and pulled her to a stop.

"Ms. Bolt why are you-….where is your shirt?"

Lulu crossed her arms over her chest to hide her bra from her professor's line of sight. Snape pulled the students robe closed and quickly buttoned it.

"What happened to your shirt?" he asked again.

"Felina ate it!"

220. –I am not allowed to make any part of the school uniform edible.

"Let us in!"

"Shhhh…we is try…trying to be..qui-qui-quiet!"

"We're fucking locked out! Screw being quiet!"

"Bitch."

"Let us in! I'm cold!"

Snape made his way closer to the gates of Hogwarts, noticing it was Felina and Lulu who stood at the gate. When he was a few feet from the gate, he stopped and pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing in exasperation at the sight before him.

Felina's clothes were two sizes too big for the lithe girl. The shirt drooped low, exposing her pink polka dot bro and the skirt was lopsided on her hips, revealing part of her matching thong. The robe trailed behind her like a cape with the cuffs covering her hands.

Lulu seemed to have the opposite problem. Her clothes were far too small for the voluptuous girl's frame. The shirt was stretched tight of her ample breast and showed her midriff. She seemed to have only been able to manage the lower few buttons and her black bra with red skulls was left visible. The skirt had been fixed higher on her waist and left unzipped so that her matching panties were revealed through the zipper and underneath the skirt. The robe was tight across her shoulders and back and the sleeves went halfway up her forearms. Both girls were barefoot with their hair a mess and reeked of alcohol.

247. I should not show up at the front gate wearing part of another houses uniform, messily drunk.

"Shut up!" Lulu cried, leveling a dangerous glare at Amanda Greengrass. "Oh my gods, do you even ever listen to your own inane chatter or just tune it out 'cause even you can't stand to hear yourself talk?"

"Your mother was a blood traitor for even thinking of sleeping with your father!" Amanda sneered. "Before her, the line was one of the purest out there!"

Snape moved forward to stop Amanda from speaking further. She wouldn't get much more out if Lulu's murderess expression was anything to go by. Suddenly, the furious expression left Lulu's face almost as if it had been cut off. Her full lips twisted into an evil smile and she brandished her wand.

"AVADA KEDAVRA!" Lulu cried. Amanda shrieked and dove to the side, slamming into a suit of armor, causing it to fall on top of her. Lulu burst out laughing at the sight of the normally prissy girl in a heap on the floor. Still laughing, she stepped over the fallen girl and made her way down the corner. As she passed the dark corridor Snape was hiding in, he casually fell into step behind her.

"Ms. Bolt…" he began.

"She deserved it," Lulu said flippantly.

"Be that as it may you could have tried any other curse," Snape pointed out. Lulu simply shrugged.

259. I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover.

"You three," McGonagall said, pointing to Jael, Felina and Lulu. "The headmaster wishes to see you."

Jael, Felina and Lulu stood and gathered their school bags then exited the class. Lulu stood in the middle of the hall and set her hands on her hips. Felina and Jael each moved to one side of her and looped their arms through hers. The three then began to skip down the hall, singing.

277. I am not to sing 'We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz!' when sent to the Headmaster's office'.

As they passed the portrait of the bowl of fruit, Felina paused and ran inside. When she reemerged she had thirty house elves in tow. The three then resumed their skipping and singing with the house elves joining in.

278. - I am definitely not to sing it accompanied by the house elves acting as a backing group.

Dobby, who stood at the head, conjured up a kazoo and the other elves followed suit.

279. -Especially not with kazoos.

"Ms. Gibran, it has come to my attention that you may have taken Ms. Greengrass' book bag and placed it in the disappearing toilet, is this true?" Professor McGonagall asked. Jael looked intently at the Professor and waved her hand slowly in front of her face.

"These are not the droids you are looking for," she said in a low, calm voice.

282. When being interrogated by a member of staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce 'These are not the droids you are looking for'.

Felina kicked in the door to Snapes class room, startling his third year Gryffindor/ Sytherin class. She brandished a wooden sword at the Potions Master and glared.

"Ms. Accius, what is the meaning of this?" he demanded.

"'Ello, my name is Felina Accius, you kill my father, prepare to die," Felina declared and began chasing after the Professor, waving the wooden toy.

307. Professor Snape did not kill my father and does not deserve to die.

The potions classroom was rocked by a massive explosion. Smoke poured from the door that had been hastily flung open. Snape barked at the students to hurry out of the classroom. They staggered out into the hallway, coughing.

"That's the last time I do that," Lulu said. Snape whirled around on her and grabbed her by the shoulders.

"What exactly was it that you did, Ms. Bolt?" he asked trough gritted teeth.

"Put the ingredients in backwards?" Lulu asked with a smile.

310. I will not follow potion instructions in reverse order 'to see what happens'.

Jael watched as Snape spat vicious words at a student whose potions attempt had melted her cauldron.

"Professor?" she called.

"What, Ms. Gibran?" Snape sneered.

"You know what your problem is?" she asked. A hush fell over the class at the ballsie question. A dangerous glint came to Snape's eyes and he arched a brow at her.

"Do tell, Ms. Gibran," he snarled.

"You need to get laid," she declared. The class burst out laughing as Snapes face took on an alarming shade of red, whether it was from anger or embarrassment, it was hard to say.

321. Professor Snape's problem is not that "he needs to get laid".

Peeves floated down the hall, peeking into dark corridors as he went. When he found the one he was looking for, his face split into a grin and he darted inside, dropping down to hover next to Felina.

"Do you have it?" the spirit asked excitedly.

"Do you?" Felina countered.

"Of course!" Peeves said, slightly offended. "The password is 'Half a Prince." Felina grinned and reached into her school bag, pulling out a flip-top box labeled 'Dungbombs'. Peeves cackled and snatched it from Felina with a smile.

326. Providing Peeves with a case of dungbombs was a socially irresponsible action, and I will not do it again.

DHMB: Yay! Another chapter! I can also take request's if anyone wishes for me to do a certain rule. Other's have commented about this being in the Harry/ Draco section and there doesn't seem to be much Harry/ Draco action. This is because most of the rule involving Harry/Draco seem to be at the end of this list. When I had finished this the first time there were a few but since I have taken it down and am re-doing it, they are not yet up. I did have this in another section originally but I kept getting all these homophobes and shit and just got tired of it. I actually went back and changed rule 136 because I got an idea that went along with the Harry/Draco theme more. Yay!