"Will you please be reasonable?" said Lily, the next morning as she came into the kitchen closely followed by Colin.
"I am being reasonable Lily. I don't moan that you are more than a little close to your ex husband, never mind that you live with him….." said Colin.
"You are moaning about now though."
"I'm not this has nothing to do with who you live with, this is about us and our relationship. We've been together a year and a half don't you think it's time, we took the next step," said Colin.
"But I like it here, can't you move in here?"
"With the ex husband, the werewolf and Black?"
"They are my friends"
"And I'm your boyfriend"
"Yeah and my boyfriend is being a jerk, I like it here," said Lily, getting angry even though he did have a point.
"I think you need to think about your priorities, and where they lie. I'm not asking you to give up your friends, I just want us to move on….."
"I have a drawer at your place, and a key"
"But I want you there."
"I spend half the time there anyway"
"But I want you there all the time. It doesn't even need to be my place, we could find somewhere else together."
"But…."
"Like I said, you need to think about your priorities….Dinner tonight?" said Colin, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.
"Okay," she said.
"Leaky Cauldron, 7pm?"
"I'll be there"
"Okay, I gotta go to work," said Colin.
"Bye," said Lily.
Colin left and when Lily heard him apparate, she screamed out in frustration.
"What? What's going on? Are you alright?" gasped James running into the kitchen in his boxers with his wand drawn.
"MEN!!!" shouted Lily.
"You had a fight with Colin?"
"Yes"
"You screamed, woke me up on my day off, scared the life out of me, made me think you were being attacked all because you had a fight with your boyfriend"
"Ummm….yes," said Lily sheepishly, "Sorreee"
"It's alright," sighed James, putting the kettle on, "What happened?"
"He wants to move in together," sighed Lily, not noticing James wince.
"Okay, and why were you fighting about that? Do you not want to move in with him?"
"I don't know"
"You don't know?"
"No I don't know. I mean we have been together a year and a half, and it is the next logical step…"
"But…"
"How did you know there was a but?"
"Because I know you," grinned James.
"I like it here, I love living here. It just feels safer here, than out there," shrugged Lily.
"Ask him to move in here, I mean he is a member of the Order," said James before he could stop himself.
"I already suggested that, but he wasn't crazy about that idea," sighed Lily.
"Because of me?"
"Partly, I think he just wanted us to live alone with each other," said Lily.
"I don't blame him," muttered James.
"What?" said Lily, she hadn't heard what he had said.
"I mean I can see why he would feel that way," said James.
"I guess, so can I but….. I don't want to leave here," said Lily. "He said I need to think about my priorities"
"What do you think?"
"I think I want things to stay the same. I mean we spend most nights together anyway why do we have to live together?"
"You shouldn't do anything you don't want to do, or anything you aren't ready for," said James.
"I know, and I know he would never force me to…."
"Do what makes you happy."
"I will"
"Promise"
"I promise"
"Good. I mean it don't move in with him, just to make him happy. Do it because it's what you truly want. I'd hate to see you unhappy, you deserve so much better," said James.
"Thank you," said Lily touched by his words.
"No problem, and if you need someone to talk to…."
"I know. Who do I always talk to?"
"Just reminding you flower"
-----------------------------------------------
"James…." Whispered Lily.
She had just gotten back from dinner with Colin. James was already in bed, but she needed to talk to someone. So she crept into his room.
"Uh…Lily….What's up?" mumbled James groggily.
"Are you sleeping?"
"I was," he groaned.
"Oh sorry….I'll just…"
"Come in Lily," he said, he knew she needed to talk.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes"
"Oh good," she said, "Scoot over"
James grunted but shifted over so that she could climb into his bed with him.
"So what's up?" he asked trying to ignore the fact that she was lying next to him in hot pants and little strappy top.
"I told Colin I didn't want to move in together just yet," she said cuddling into him.
"And what did he say?" said James, "If he pressured you or….. I'll kill him"
"No, he didn't. He was nice about it, he said he would give me some time because he knew that I had been badly hurt in the past and that it was hard for me to trust guys," said Lily, forgetting that she was talking to the man that had hurt her.
"I'm so sorry Lily, I….If I could go back and change what happened I would. I hate that you can't trust men because of me and what I did," said James suddenly holding Lily closer.
"It's alright, I told you I forgave you for that a long time ago," said Lily, she was surprised to find that it still hurt to talk about it.
"But it's still my fault, you don't trust people like you used to"
"It's alright James, really I think this is more to do with me than you," said Lily.
"Okay, but I am so sorry for everything"
"It's all in the past now"
"So what else happened?"
"He told me he loved me," said Lily, "He has never said that before, he implied it but he never said the words."
"What did you say?"
"I said do you want to split a dessert?" said Lily, "It's not exactly what he was expecting but…."
"Do you love him?" said James painfully, someone else loved her now, and they had more of a chance than he did. She would probably say she did love him, they would get married and have children. And he would die bitter and alone, because he had cheated on the only good thing in his life.
"Umm…. I don't know…. I couldn't say it and mean it," said Lily sadly, "I hurt him and he didn't deserve it. He is a kind sweet man, who adores me and would never hurt me and yet I couldn't say three little words to him."
"It's not your fault. Love isn't something you can force, never say it unless you mean it. Don't try to force it"
"When did you become so wise?" teased Lily.
"I've always been wise, dear," said James, kissing the top of her head, "Now try and get some sleep, everything will seem so much better in the morning"