A/N: Gah! Exams are coming up and I haven't started preparing yet! And what's supposed to be 'dead week' is filled with humanities and french essays and tests .

Anyway, I finally have someone for Orochimaru! Yay, he's loved by someone!

Ryoko Takara (Storm the Albatross), a 32-year-old jounin, will capture his undivided attention 3

Please R&R!

Moyagakure and Kumogakure: Why Being Quiet Once In a While Is Helpful

Itachi's POV:

I didn't exactly sleep during the night or into the morning, just a few hours of napping. I didn't really want to be the first to leave and find a female, and was in no hurry to leave. I even took the time to wait for Kisame to get up and leave. Kisame sleeps in late, at least compared to the rest of us.

When I finally did leave the base, I sensed Madara also leaving the base. I also sensed unfamiliar chakra signatures within the base. Probably Sasori's and Zetsu's. There was also a slight chance that Deidara had tagged along with them and found a girl for himself, but I didn't really care what he was up to.

Kisame and Kakuzu weren't back yet and Hidan wasn't even awake yet. Madara had just left and I was just about to leave. Perfect. I walked calmly and smoothly along the paths to get to Moyagakure, only straying from the paths to take shortcuts through the 'dangerous' woods.

When I reached the village, I slipped in through one of the lesser gate, unnoticed by border patrol, and effectively masked my chakra. As I reached the center of the village, I pulled out my bingo book and squinted at the pages. I frowned. Reading was getting harder and harder these days.

My eyes finally rested on a page that was printed in a larger font size. Aero Mikuzaki, 20 years old, ANBU captain. She uses twin katanas, kenjutsu, and taijutsu. Chakra type: wind and earth. My frown lessened and I put the book away. All that was left was to find this girl. I asked (used mangekyou on them until they finally gave me useful information) a couple villagers about her and found out that her favorite place to 'hang out' was a bar a couple blocks down from the center of the village. Maybe this would be easier than I thought.

I entered the bar and was surprised to run into a very drunk person. I put my hands on her shoulders to prevent her from falling, as she was swaying dangerously close to the point of falling over let alone walking in a straight line. She chuckled and very promptly crashed her lips onto mine.

I pulled away quickly and grimaced at the sharp taste of alcohol.

"Who are you?" I asked, keeping her at an arms distance to prevent her from trying anything else. She had hip-length purple hair that was in a messy braid down the back of her black tube top over an elbow length mesh top. She was also wearing knee length mesh leggings under a purple wrap skirt and standard black ninja sandals.

"Eyem 'hic' Aero 'hic' Mikuzaki. Whah 'bout yooh 'hic'?" She replied, smiling widely, before passing out in my arms. I stared at the now unconscious girl in my arms in shock for a few seconds before slinging her over my shoulder and carrying her back to the Akatsuki base.

Tobi/Madara's POV:

I didn't want to be the first to leave, nor did I want to leave last. I wanted to be the fourth person to leave. It's just my luck that my alarm didn't go off at the right time. Instead of going off at 6am, like I had set it to, it went off at 9am. Great way to start the day.

After smashing my alarm clock to itty bitty pieces, I went to Pein's room to get a report on who had come back with mates already, who was still gone, and who hadn't left yet. However, Pein was occupied with… certain things. I was just glad that I heard what he was doing before I walked into the bedroom.

I then made up my mind that I would just go out and grab a girl a quickly as possible and come right back to give Pein further instructions on what to do. By then he would surely be done with his… activities…

I left the base and quickly made up my mind to go to Kumogakure, just like I had bugged Deidara about. I poofed just inside the borders of Kumo and masked my chakra. Then I walked aimlessly around the village, putting on the Tobi façade.

"Hello, missy! It's such a nice day today, isn't it?" I asked in a particularly annoying voice to a girl in a plain white dress and white shoes. She looked curiously at me for a minute before smiling cutely.

"Yes it is!" Then her face turned into a mock serious expression.

"You know, Cina is a good girl and was promised that she'd get a chocolate chip cookie if she stayed right here and didn't move." Now it was my turn to look at her curiously for a little bit. She was a lot like Tobi. So I decided to test her some more.

"You know, Tobi is a good boy too. And Tobi is looking for a girlfriend currently. Does Cina know anyone who might be interested?" I asked, switching to my Madara voice and getting closer to her with each word until our bodies were almost touching and I was whispering in her ear. She facial expression changed, but not to the one I thought it would change to.

"Cina might know someone, but Tobi may have to wait for a little while for Cina to get back to him," she said, smirking darkly. So far, I was very pleased with her behavior.

"My name isn't really Tobi, it's Madara."

"Well then, Madara, it's a pleasure to be in your presence," she flirted, which made my pants tighten. No person had ever made me feel this way before. She was definitely something special.

At this point, I used mangekyou on her and she passed out immediately. I flipped through my bingo book, searching to see if-ah! There she was. Name: Cina Klien. Age: 17. Rank: none. Chakra: small amount. Techniques: mostly taijutsu. Special: sent hundreds of rouge ninja to their graves.

I looked at the unconscious girl. She had tanned skin and wavy chocolate-brown hair that fell just below her shoulders. She was kind of short and looked weak. How'd she manage to kill so many people? I shrugged the thought off for the moment and focused on creating a portal to bring me and an unconscious Cina back to the Akatsuki lair.

A/N: Heh heh. Pein was 'occupied.' Anyway, 7 down, a still-sleeping Hidan left to go. I guarantee that Hidan will be unlucky when it comes to retrieving his girl(s) ^.^ so much the funnier to see Hidan being chased by an angry mob.

I still need some people's catch phrases, please!