Weakness of the Heart
Chapter 4
Rule 2: Pushing Your Limits
The bright morning light peered through the cracks in the curtains, piercing through the darkness of his narrowed eyes. Sasuke sighed heavily, displeased by every aspect of his surroundings. He glared at the silver-haired man in front of him as he watched him prepare his breakfast—a strange moment that he never imagined he would encounter.
The bubbling sound of boiling water broke the silence between them, and he seethed, wishing the pleasing sound of utter silence would return. Crossing his arms defensively, the dark-haired boy let his eyes wander to the table in front of him.
"So… you and Sakura seem awfully close now…"
Immediately, the air was filled with a thick, foreboding aura, but it didn't seem to affect either man as they sat distantly in the kitchen, awaiting their breakfast. It was the first thing that had been said all morning, and it was probably not the wisest thing to start the day with.
Kakashi turned to face the prying boy, a bowl of steaming rice in his hand. "Oh, really? Hmm… I never noticed."
Sasuke narrowed his eyes darker, until the only thing peeking through his eyelashes were two black orbs. "Don't play dumb with me."
Kakashi set the bowl down in front of the boy, shrugging slightly. "Sorry to disappoint you, but I really don't know what you are talking about."
Sasuke growled, clenching his fists until his the flesh on his knuckles turned white. He wanted to say something, but he wasn't sure what. Kakashi had an excellent talent of always being able to say the last word, regardless of the topic, and it infuriated him to no end.
The silver-haired man sat down at the table across from the enraged boy. He shrugged, pulling his bowl closer to him. "Besides, what's it to you? You never seemed interested in her life before. In fact, I remember you avoiding her at all costs…"
Sasuke beat his clenched fist on the table angrily, causing the small apartment to echo with rage. "Shut-up! I am not interested. I am just disgusted by the mere thought of it!"
"Oh… is that what that is?"
Sasuke stood abruptly, causing the small bowl of rice to tip over. Without a word, he turned away from the silver-haired man and stormed out of the kitchen, leaving the spilled rice cold and forlorn. Kakashi's half-lidded eye trailed towards the doorway of the kitchen as a small smirk graced his lips.
He's going to regret not eating breakfast…
A bead of warm sweat trickled into his eye, causing him to wince slightly from the pain. He quickly forced the pain away with determination as he pressed on, springing from tree to tree. His labored breathing made his body shudder, and he faltered slightly, his arm colliding with a leathery tree branch.
Whoooshh!
A kunai whizzed past his cheek and pierced through the bark of the tree next to him. He glared at it darkly, letting out a silent hiss of anger.
"Sasuke… you are lacking today. A shinobi of your stature never falters."
The nonchalant tone in his voice made the dark-haired boy tremble with rage. Damn him… he is wearing my stamina to nothing!
Kakashi appeared at the tree next to him, a trail of puffy smoke dissipating around him. He was crouched down lazily, his eyes glued to the pages of the book in front of him. Sasuke glowered at him as he wiped a trickle of blood off his cheek.
They had been going at it for three laborious hours. At first, Sasuke fought back well, and even had the glorious chance to catch Kakashi off guard a few times. But that quickly diminished as a lack of nutrition stifled his body. He was weak and vulnerable now, his chakra practically withered to nothing.
Sasuke hadn't given up though, and he probably never would. The day an Uchiha gave up before death would be the day of the Apocalypse.
He lunged towards Kakashi, a shuriken in hand. Kakashi didn't even look up; he simply stepped aside, letting the dark-haired boy swing at the air viciously as he fell to the ground.
Kakashi peered down at the ground from the branch he was sitting at. "Are you done for today Sasuke?" He knew the answer, but he asked it anyway; he enjoyed pissing Sasuke off.
Sasuke growled; his body shook violently as he tried to pull himself into a sitting position. "Not until I take your life…"
Kakashi jumped down from the tree and kneeled before the dark-haired boy. "Well, at your physical condition, I really don't think that is possible… is it?"
Kakashi glanced down at the fatigued boy, expecting a dark glare; instead, he saw his eyes peering out into the distance, a determined look adorning his features. Kakashi followed his line of sight, narrowing his eyes to distinguish the figure in the distance.
Her rose-colored locks drifted in the wind, haloing her slouched figure. A shadow was cast over her tilted face, hiding her features from the sunlight.
Kakashi glanced up at the sky, studying the position of the sun. It can't be five o'clock yet…
As her figure approached, Sasuke pulled himself into a sitting position and wiped the sweat off of his forehead. "What is she doing here?"
Kakashi stood up silently, shoving his hands in his pockets. He ignored Sasuke's comment, studying Sakura as she approached them. She glanced up at them, a feeling of uneasiness washing over her as their intense stares bore into her.
Kakashi stepped forward to great the lethargic girl. "Sakura… What are you doing here?"
She blushed slightly, crossing her arms defensively. "Tsunade let me go early today…"
"Oh… I see."
"Why? Did you do something wrong?" Sasuke's arrogant voice rang in her ears, causing her to wince slightly.
She turned towards him, an agitated look pressed into her features. "No, I did not. She said I was too distracted to finish… or something like that."
"Distracted? By what?"
She hissed under her breath. "I don't know Sasuke…"
Kakashi stepped between the two young comrades, waving a disregarding hand at them. "It doesn't matter…" He sighed, turning towards Sakura. "But I am going to have to work you harder for that. A shinobi should never be distracted during their line of work."
She nodded silently, letting her eyes drift to the ground. She suddenly wished she hadn't said anything. In fact, she almost convinced herself not to come to training at all. After last night, she wanted to avoid confrontation at all costs… at least until she had her emotions sorted out. The funny part was—Kakashi's actions weren't what bothered her so; it was her that bothered her… the way she acted… the things she said. She never expected herself to act so strange around Sasuke. In the past, she would've thrown her arms around him and yelled 'Sasuke-kun!' Instead, she shied away timidly… more so than usual… and she actually didn't want to be around him. She felt tormented around him, almost insulted. The day he left Konoha, he had smeared her feelings in the ground like dirt, and, apparently, it had affected her heart more than she thought.
Sasuke scoffed, tearing Sakura away from her thoughts. "Whatever, I am going to take off…"
"Oh, no you're not…"
Kakashi held his arm out, blocking Sasuke's path. Sasuke glared back at him, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "You may be the one who has to watch over me for now, but you are not my slave driver."
Kakashi raised a sliver brow disbelievingly. "Oh? Last time I checked you were still a genin and I was still your sensei." He paused, letting his eyes drift over to Sakura. "Now, you are going to help me with Sakura's training."
Sakura's jaw dropped slightly, bewildered. She glanced over at Sasuke momentarily, registering the amused look on his face.
He smirked. "I am going to help her train...?" He chuckled. "This should be interesting…"
Kakashi crossed his arms. "Don't let your head get too big. You will be my guinea pig per se…"
Sasuke furrowed his brows. "Excuse me?"
Kakashi ignored him, turning towards Sakura lazily. "I need you to work on your stamina." He paused, observing the disgruntled look on Sakura's face. "You need to do as many sit-ups and push-ups you can to surpass Sasuke."
"What!" Sakura's voice squeaked confoundedly.
Sasuke simply chuckled, unable to contain his laughter. Sakura's eyes drifted between Sasuke and Kakashi with fret. He has to be joking… There is no way I can beat Sasuke! Not even Naruto can beat Sasuke! Her heart began to pound clamorously in her chest; she felt as if her entire rib cage was getting ready to collapse.
"You have to be kidding sensei."
His impassive gaze remained unchanged. "No, I am not kidding…" He shot Sakura a warning look. "And no use of chakra, Sakura."
"What?" Sakura squealed. Without the use of her chakra, her strength was meager. She bit her lip, suddenly feeling the crushing pressure of defeat already.
Sasuke snickered. "Really, she is right. She can't beat me."
Kakashi narrowed his eyes at the arrogant boy. "We'll just have to see about that. Let's start with push-ups…"
Sasuke sighed heavily, getting on his hands and knees. He shifted his weight on his toes, letting his arms stabilize his upper body. "Come on, Sakura! Are you just going to stand there gaping?"
She swallowed insensibly, falling to a kneeling position. Her mind spiraled as she readied her body, shifting the weight of her upper body onto her arms. She had done this a million times, and each time, she felt like an insult to anyone who called themselves a ninja. She was not a woman of physical strength, and she probably never would be. She drew off her chakra to fix that weakness. But there she was, positioned adjacent to one of the most acclaimed ninja in Konoha, ready to challenge him in a competition in push-ups. Something about it seemed so unrighteous.
Kakashi reached in the pouch on his outer thigh, pulling out his familiar sensual novel. "Alright… you may begin."
She hesitated at first, but quickly lowered her upper body down and hoisted it back up until her elbows were virtually straight. She continued her movements in quick, fluid actions, determined to keep up with the dark-haired boy. In the corner of her eye she watched him avidly… up… down… up… down… He seemed so swift at first—one of her push-ups equaled two of his push-ups. She began to feel discouraged as she watched him hasten through his push-ups with ease. She gritted her teeth as the familiar burning pain surged through her arms, causing her whole body to tremble. Just when she was ready to give up:
"You falter only because you think you can't, Sakura."
Kakashi's smooth, stoic voice filled her ears, distinguishing the pain momentarily. He was right… and she knew it. But how could she not feel intimidated by Sasuke…?
She squeaked slightly at the pain, but pressed on. Everything inside of her wanted to give up, but something eerie in the back of her mind was telling her to proceed.
And just before her hopes surrendered to the burning pain, she noticed something in the corner of her eye:
Sasuke had faltered…
She watched him eagerly as his body trembled… up… down… up… pause…down...
She couldn't believe what she was seeing… it was absolutely baffling. Sasuke had stumbled! She made a mental note to check and see if the sky was falling down on her.
A newfound endeavor surged through Sakura's body as she pressed on… up… down…up… down… Her movements seemed to blur together as she picked up the pace, determined to beat out Sasuke. She had to be dreaming, she could never beat Sasuke. But dream or not, it still felt gratifying…
Kakashi peeled his eye away from his novel, a small smirk curling underneath his dark mask as he peered at the pink-haired girl. Her rose-colored locks stuck to her forehead in moist clumps as sweat dripped down her face. Her emerald eyes were wide and bursting with ardor as she pushed her body up and down. A feeling of satisfaction washed over him as he watched her sustain her physical boundaries. He always seemed to know how to motivate Sakura beyond her mental limits, and she had no idea.
Glancing over at the dark-haired boy next to her, Kakashi frowned, noting the debilitated aura seeping from his outer exterior. He was pushing himself way beyond his limits, and his body was exemplifying it. If he pushed himself any longer…
"Sasuke, that's enough."
Sasuke brushed his words away like dust… up… pause… down… up… His entire body quivered with every movement, but he wasn't ready to give up. He would never succumb to that.
"SASUKE! I said THAT'S ENOUGH!"
Kakashi lunged forward and pushed the steadfast boy on his side. His limp body skid through the dirt, emitting a puff of billowing dirt. Sakura let out a squeal of pain as her shuddering arms gave out beneath her and her shoulder collided with the rocky ground. She glanced over at Sasuke wearily, her chest heaving up and down in shallow, suffocating breaths. A feeling of anxiety swelled in her veins as she gazed at the struggling form he had become.
Kakashi crossed his arms condescendingly, peering down at the palpitating boy. He narrowed his eyes slightly, watching the dark-haired boy claw deliriously at his chest in attempt to calm his erratic breathing.
"You fool. You would push your limits to near death out of stubborn pride?" He scoffed, shaking his head slightly. "You're pathetic…"
Sakura's eyes widened in horror as Sasuke's body fell limp, his face smearing into the dirt beneath him. Her kunoichi instincts reverberated as she lunged forward to cradle the unconscious boy. Panic struck her as she fearfully checked his vital signs, searching for any sign of movement…
She gawked up at Kakashi, a storm of trepidation swirling in her emerald eyes. He simply gazed back at her lethargically, obviously not as vexed by the situation as her.
"Leave him be Sakura. He just needs some rest. And when he wakes up, he will need some food and water."
A miniscule wave of relief washed over her as she released the catatonic boy from her grip. She sighed as she squeezed her eyes shut, attempting to lull the anxiety thumping wildly in her chest. She couldn't believe it; none of it made sense to her. She had beat Sasuke. He had collapsed into a withering ball of unconsciousness, and there she sat—completely healthy and utterly unharmed. Should she feel proud? Disoriented? She wasn't quite sure…
Kakashi gazed down at the troubled girl. "Sakura, I swear he is fine. There is no need to look so dazed."
She peered up at him through her heavy eye-lids. "No, it's not that. It just doesn't make any sense…"
He kneeled down next to the pink-haired girl, sending her a reassuring look. "Sure it does. He has pushed himself all day without any food or water. Any shinobi, regardless of rank, would collapse the way he did."
Sakura remained silent, unable to lock eyes with her impassive sensei. She felt so empty, and she wasn't quite sure why. A small, proud part in the back of her mind seemed disappointed that she hadn't really beat Sasuke. As sorry as she felt for him, she still felt piqued that she could barely beat an overwrought Sasuke.
"Now there is a lesson behind this. Can you guess it?" Kakashi's deep, expressionless voice filled her ears, suppressing her thoughts.
She gazed back at him queerly, her mouth slightly agape. "Umm… always eat breakfast?"
He chuckled slightly at her comment. "Not quite…" He glanced over at the limp dark-haired boy. "People like Sasuke, they have a problem controlling their stamina because they over exert themselves when they don't need to. Sure, he may pack a powerful punch when he needs to, but a successful shinobi is one that can outlast an enemy, not overpower him."
She nodded dumbfoundedly. "Duh, Kakashi-sensei…" She shook her head haughtily. "You should be aware that I know things like this. I am the master of chakra control, remember?"
He rolled his eyes. "I wouldn't go that far…"
She glared at him disdainfully, her lower lip puckering out slightly. "Hey, that's not very nice."
He brushed off her comment, turning towards the slumbering boy at his feet. Lacing his arms underneath his shoulders, he hoisted the dark-haired boy onto his back. Without a word, he began making his way out of the clearing.
"Hey! Where are you going?"
He tilted his head towards the pink-haired girl, sending her a sluggish look. "I am taking him back to my house where he can rest. Are you coming?"
Sakura nodded silently as her legs broke into a brisk jog after Kakashi.
The entire way there, she remained silent as curious thoughts danced across her mind. Regardless of his physical exhaustion, she could mark that day as the day she surpassed an Uchiha…
Sakura sat timidly in Kakashi's strangely organized apartment, her eyes roaming across every detail, searching for something inept. She felt peculiarly swallowed by the earthly tones that the walls emitted; something she hadn't noticed in the darkness the night before. Everything seemed to have a certain place—a resourceful purpose, that is, except her.
She tapped her foot impatiently, suddenly overwhelmed by the utter silence. Everything inside of her seethed with regret. Why had she come to his apartment again?
A peculiar thought struck her as she restlessly awaited the return of her sensei—she was sitting… alone in his bedroom. Normally, it would be a perfectly normal thing to sit innocently in a friend's room, but this was Hatake Kakashi—a man of mystery. She wasn't allowed to breech such territory. At least she thought so.
Letting her eyes trail over to the shelf above his bed, a glinting picture frame caught her eye. She reached over and gently cradled the picture in her hand, letting her eyes study the image before her.
It was a picture of team 7 when they were younger. Sakura was beaming happily in the middle between an orange-clad Naruto and a scowling Sasuke. Behind her, a smiling Kakashi cradled his team with pride.
Those were the good old days….
A hint of sorrow surfaced as Sakura analyzed the existence of team 7. Since Sasuke left Konoha, Naruto and Sakura had went their separate ways, and, inevitably, rarely saw much of each other. Sakura had spent all of her time training to be a medic, and Naruto spent his on various ranking missions. And despite the resentment she held for him in the past, she missed the annoying blonde-headed boy. He was always there to back her up if she needed a shoulder to lean on. But now, they had both matured, and although he was still the same old Naruto, he wasn't quite as passionate as he used to be—a quality she never imagined she would miss.
Solemnly returning the photo to the shelf, Sakura sighed wistfully. She missed those days sometimes. It seemed so easy, even though they thought it was so damn hard. Funny how life works that way—one minute you are struggling only to find the next minute you will be suffering.
Her brows furrowed as her emerald eyes gazed off into the distance, focusing on nothing in particular but the melancholy. During those days, Sasuke and Naruto were around her all the time, and her parents were there to support her. Oh, how she took advantage of the things around her. But that's the human way, it can't be helped.
She bit her lip sharply to force away the emotional pain. She had no reason to get all expressive. Not there, in Kakashi's apartment. She didn't need him lecturing her on the importance of emotion control as a ninja.
She shook her head violently, attempting to somehow clobber the somber thoughts out of her mind. Finally realizing that shaking her head was only giving her a migraine, she let her eyes scan the room obstinately until a distracting target was found.
Desk… jounin vest… scrolls… paper…..
Oh! What's this?
Her eyes landed on a small object carefully hidden underneath a scattered piece of paper. She reached over cautiously and gingerly traced over its rectangular form. In large letters it read: Come Come Paradise: Vol. 4
Sakura's eyes glinted with mischief as she snatched the book up and hugged it close to her chest. She scanned the room warily, searching for any form of life waiting to catch her in this devilish act.
She smirked wickedly as a feeling of victory surged through her body; everyone had always wondered what was in that book, and now she was about to be the first one to find out. She hadn't felt this satisfied in years.
Her heart pounded as she peeled open the pages cautiously, peering in them as if she were taking a peek in the men's restroom. The small words gawked at her mockingly, pleading her to read them. She glanced up at the door apprehensively before letting her eyes devour each naughty sentence.
Her first reaction was to giggle; it was too damn hilarious that such a casual man like Kakashi was reading this smut daily. But as she read on, her light-hearted giggles slipped into profuse embarrassment as she blushed deep red from her forehead to the tip of her toes.
People actually write this stuff?
They say curiosity killed the cat, but, apparently, Sakura hadn't ever received that piece of advice, for she continued to read—mouth agape and eyes wide. She was too flustered to remember where she was or what she was doing. She just kept reading out of sheer, and, not to mention, dangerous curiosity.
In fact, she was so fascinated by her newfound embarrassment that she hadn't even noticed the tall figure slipping into the bedroom quietly…
"I wasn't very fond of that issue, but I see you are taking to it very well."
Sakura's heart flew out of her throat as she let out a shrill squeal. The novel flew in the air with a fluttering sound as Sakura ducked away from the silver-haired man. She peered up at him through laced fingers, attempting to hide the crimson red shade decorating her face.
He chuckled, retrieving the novel from its disheveled position on the floor. "You know, in the past I would've scolded you for looking at such inappropriate things, but now that you are older, it's just too damn amusing to stop you."
Her heart pounded furiously, and, for a moment, she felt as if her face was going to melt off. What was I thinking! I should've known he'd catch me in the act!
"W-what a-are you talking about, Kakashi-sensei?" She stammered foolishly, searching for the right words.
He sat on the bed next to her, tilting his head as he opened the pages up for her to see. "You know, sometimes it comes with pictures."
Her eyes trailed over out of imprudent curiosity, and she squeaked as she laid her eyes on the utterly naked figures. He chuckled as he watched her face blush even deeper, its color practically matching the red outfit she was wearing.
He threw the book aside, leaning towards the flustered pink-haired girl. "That kind of stuff doesn't just happen in books, you know?"
Her jaw dropped as she shot him an insulted look. "I know that! I am not thirteen years old anymore sensei! I know perfectly well what happens between a man and a woman when they are in love!" She spat her words out defensively, suddenly feeling strangely similar to her mother.
He shrugged. "I don't know, the look on your face seems to prove that wrong."
She crossed her arms, the red hue continuing to spread across her face. "I beg your pardon! Just because I feel embarrassed when I look at smut doesn't mean I don't know what it is."
He smirked curiously underneath his mask. "Oh? So you aren't as innocent as I thought?"
She punched his arm out of defense, utterly offended by the words coming out of his mouth. "Pervert! My sexual life is something for me to know and you never to find out! So let's drop the subject because this conversation is getting us nowhere!"
He shrugged lazily. "Whatever you say…"
She wasn't quite sure what his comment meant, but she brushed it aside, too flustered to think at the moment. She just couldn't believe what she was hearing. He actually had the balls to assume she was interested in such a dirty form of entertainment. Albeit, she was interested, but only out of curiosity, so it didn't count; at least not to her.
Pushing her thoughts away, Sakura's mind slipped back to reality—Sasuke—was he still asleep? Had Kakashi gotten him to stir in his sleep while she sat impatiently in his bedroom? And… wait… wasn't he supposed it be with Kakashi?
"Kakashi-sensei? What happened with Sasuke? Where is he?" Her words fluttered out a little swifter than she expected.
He leaned back lazily on his bed, kicking his legs up drowsily. "He's fine… I was going to bring him in here to rest, but then I realized that I am an asshole, and don't particularly want to give my bed up to him."
She rolled her eyes; that was sure true. As collected as Kakashi was, he still had a sharp, sarcastic side to him that could gouge just about anyone's pride.
Suddenly realizing the awkwardness of the situation, she blushed, searching for another topic to approach. Her mind reeled and reeled, but no matter how hard she tried, everything seemed like the wrong thing to say at the moment—it was either too casual, too rude, or too difficult to say.
Noting her vexed state, Kakashi nudged her with his knee, attempting to catch her attention. "What's the matter? I don't embarrass you that much, do I?"
She bit her lip nervously. "N-no, it's not that… it's just…" She turned towards him earnestly. "W-well, don't you think this is… weird. I mean, I am sitting on your bed."
He shrugged. "No, why would it be weird? It's not like we are doing anything…"
She blushed again, beginning to feel accustomed to the burning feeling emanating from her cheeks. Why was Kakashi suddenly making her feel so nervous all the time? Had he really changed that much during their time apart? Or rather, had she really changed that much?
She shifted the subject again, attempting to distinguish her embarrassment, or, at least, sustain it. "Kakashi," She paused, searching for the right choice of words. "Why did Sasuke come back?"
Kakashi was solemnly silent for a few moments as his half-lidded eye gazed off into the distance lazily. She watched him worriedly, suddenly beginning to feel a bit paranoid by his rigid silence. "I don't know Sakura…"
The rest of the evening seemed cumbersome and suffocating to Sakura. Neither she nor Kakashi spoke much as they watched over Sasuke, impatiently awaiting his awakening. She felt like she was at fault for the awkward aura—like her words had brought a heavy burden onto their shoulders. But little did she know she was absolutely wrong:
Because it was the one, massive question that had been racking all their brains since he returned…
Why…?