Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and the characters that make it amazing. I'm just borrowing them for a little while.
Chapter 9
Final Days
Isabella woke to the soft snoring of her husband. While they had fallen asleep with her wrapped in his arms, it had somehow turned into him wrapped in hers. His head was resting on her chest and she realized that while she slept she must have been playing with his hair. She rolled her eyes at those 'fairy tales' Edward had spoken of before. The Good Lord must have known what they were planning and he must truly hate her. This was a punishment from God. Edward was finally being the husband that she needed just in time for her to be taken away to tend to her sick father.
As carefully as possible, she slipped out from underneath him and snuck over to the door. Her efforts of not waking him almost came to a halt as Jacob stepped out of the room he had been sleeping in, causing her to bite back a surprised yelp. "Isabelle..."
"Shh...Edward is still sleeping," she whispered, taking him by the arm and leading him to the library.
"Perhaps we should be going. Your father is excited to see you and Alice is..."
"How are they not upset? I am disgracing my entire family, Jacob! Even Peter and Miss Charlotte..."
"...still love you. Edward has explained everything to me..."
"This is wrong. In the eyes of God, this is wrong! If I leave him...we will all be punished! I can not bear to bring more bad fortune to our family!"
"Isabelle, he explained that you would feel this way," Jacob said, as if that made everything okay.
"Explained? I don't understand! Explained what?"
"That you were unhappy here but you would not leave on your own accord...he was worried that you would feel...unwanted...due to the circumstances. Father Daniels suggests that you return home with me. It can be over. All of this can be over."
"Jacob," Isabella began, trying to find a way to stall for time, "I need to eat before we leave and..."
"Isabelle, I did not want to let on that...well, your father is very unwell. If we do not leave now, I am afraid we may be too late. I only want you to be able to say goodbye before..."
Tears were in her eyes as she shook her head, feeling guilty for trying to stay when the few precious moments to be had with her father were ticking away. "Of course, Jacob. I am sorry..."
"Are your things gathered?"
She realized then that she had taken no time to prepare for her departure. She thought of what she had here and shook her head, they were all material things, things that could be replaced—albeit at a hefty price, but they could be replaced none the less. "I only wish to take a few things. I will get them."
She knew his eyes were on her as she walked away from him, back down the hallway to her and Edward's bedroom. Isabella looked around and decided to take only a few things. She grabbed her composition book, her new mittens, hat, and cloak, and the books Edward had brought to her from his trip. His absence was already beginning to be felt and she knew if she did not leave before he awoke, she would never have the strength to do so. "Jacob," she began, striding towards him purposefully, ready to go, "I am ready when you are."
"Isabella, it has been an absolute honor to serve you," Jasper nodded to her after helping her onto the back of Jacob's horse. "I wish for you to arrive safely to your home and I am sorry to hear of the ill-fate of Master Swan. He is a fine man."
"Thank you, Jasper. It was likewise wonderful to get to know you. Please, though, a friend of yours may need your friendship through one more loss."
Jasper must have known exactly what she meant because he nodded and then said to Jacob, "Protect her, Jacob. She is nothing less than a princess to us."
The sun was just barely coming up as they made their way over the wooden bridge. With each gallop, she felt like another piece of her heart was being left behind. Clutching the books Edward had given her, she tried to hold onto Jacob as well. It wasn't until long into the trip, right when she realized how awkward it was to hold onto both of them, that she noticed she could not allow herself to put her books into the messenger bag at her side. The irony of the idea of not being able to let Edward go so that she could hold onto Jacob was not lost on her.
She tried telling herself that she could return, that after she helped her father through whatever was ailing him, she would be free to go back to the castle. She even tried to hold out that hope as she looked at anything she could to try to remember her way back, village signs, odd-shaped buildings, anything that would bring her back. They stopped a few times to visit a market for food or to relieve themselves and their horse. The entire time, trying desperately to remember what she had felt just a few months prior when she would think of nothing other than riding into the sunlight, clinging tightly to Jacob Black. Now, it felt wrong. It felt painful. It felt...fake.
~EA~
EPOV
Edward woke by himself, his head pounding and a cold chill settling in his heart. Well, the cold feeling was more returning than settling. It never went away. He tried to remember his mothers words of the dead being dead, but like always, he could not even begin to accept that. He realized he was on the opposite side of the bed as he was used to being, well, at one time he had been used to it. It didn't feel right to have Bella sleep on Kate's side of the bed, when they were in the other room, so he always slept on Kate's side. This morning, he was on Bella's side and she wasn't there. Rolling over, he felt the disappointment of being alone come rushing through his veins.
Pulling himself up, his body feeling weak, he realized he had slept the entire night in his and Kate's married bed...with Bella. Regret tore through him as he gently touched Kate's pillow, where just last night Bella had laid her head, and silently apologized to his late wife. He walked out into the hallway to use the washroom, noticing the weapon's room door was opened and the room itself was empty. Neither Jacob nor Bella were to be found in his quarters. Striding into the dining hall, his heart dropped to his stomach when he saw that only his parents were seated at the table. Jasper was standing by the front doors, a frown on his face.
He knew. She was gone. He had finally managed to push her away for good. He should feel good about it, he should feel that he had done the right thing, and he should feel relief from the guilt that he felt since he agreed to marry Bella. He had no idea what he was thinking, why he thought that it would be the right thing to do. Kate must be seething from heaven. There was just something about the beauty who was Isabella. When Father Daniels had gently tried to explain what was arranged the day she came to them, he had been watching from the chapel as she stepped out of that carriage. She was beautiful but not in the way that Kate and her sisters were. She was just...her. Selfishly, he absently agreed to the wedding while he watched his mother talk away with his future wife down below.
It didn't matter anymore. None of it did. He was supposed to live happily ever after with his princess...she was gone. He was supposed to be cooing at his three month old son right now...he was gone as well. Any decent man in his position would be sitting down to breakfast with Bella and worshiping her. He remembered that was no longer possible as well. His second chance was gone.
"Edward, wait!" his mother stood, walking quickly to him. "You need not be alone..."
"Do you not see, mother?" he asked, the familiar loneliness seeping in. "It no longer matters. I am meant to be alone."
"No..."
"Do not worry for me, mother," he shook his head, turning again to go back to his private quarters, back to bed...to which bed he was still unsure.
"I will always worry for you. You are my son. Please, just come and eat..."
"It no longer matters," he said again, really walking away this time.
Standing in front of the bedroom he shared with Isabella, Edward put his forehead against it and closed his eyes. He thought of all that he had put her through during her time there, everything that he had done to hurt and ridicule her. Jacob would care for her the way she deserved, at least he kept telling himself that. He had sent a letter to her young friend, explaining that she missed him and that she was deeply unhappy but unwilling to walk away from her marriage...and that if he did not come, he worried for Isabella's mental state.
He was a lying bastard and no matter how much she had said she wanted to stay, he knew it was not what was best for her. She could not thrive here. She should be able to be with someone who could love her completely, someone who could give her children, someone who she would be safe with. He had thought he was that person for Katherine and he had been sorely mistaken.
He could remember the first day they met, just as he was coming back from the annual ball. His father, the village doctor, had been sent for and so his mother had left with him. Edward promised that he would find his way home on his own. The Denali sisters were infamous for their beauty and he could remember his friends pointing them out...not that they really needed to be pointed out. They were dressed in the finest dresses with their hair tied back in the most intricate knots.
They were leaving at the same time that he was and just as Katherine's father was helping her into their carriage, he had walked past and their eyes met. It wasn't love at first sight, in fact, he thought the whole family seemed rather stand-offish, as if they were better than everyone. Then again, they were...they were royalty. Regardless, he kept walking, not having given her so much as a sideways glance-until he heard the calls.
"Sir! Sir, please, I do not know your name! You dropped this!"
Edward glanced around, trying to figure out who was yelling at who as there was no one around him. He turned to see the young princess running towards him, a paper was waving in the air as she was trying to get his attention with it. She held her dress up so not to trip and she smiled when she realized he had stopped walking.
"I saw this fall..." she panted, holding the paper with an address of a woman his mother had wanted him to meet.
His face turned red as he took it from her and shoved it into his pocket. "Thank you, Miss..."
"Katherine? Who are you speaking with? It is time to leave!" her father was calling.
"Please, call me Kate," she smiled, turning to face him again. "What is your name?"
"Edward. Edward Cullen."
"Cullen? The doctor is your father?"
"Yes..."
"He is very kind!"
"Katherine! Now!"
"I must go. It was nice to meet you, Edward Cullen!" she called over her shoulder with a grin on her face. He watched her walk away, wondering if any one of his friends would believe that he had just ended the ball speaking to the princess.
Kate's father, Garrett Denali, hated him from the beginning. He was too young, he was too poor, he was too skinny; the only thing he wasn't in Garrett's eyes was royal. There was not one drop of upper class blood in him and until the passing of her dear father, Edward was never allowed to forget it. Kate, for whatever reason, had loved him to a fault. He had promised that he would protect her, keep her safe, let her know that she was loved, and never let her down. It was all that he had to offer her and by the time they were married and she had given him the news that he was to become a father, he truly thought things would be well for them.
He had lied to himself and he had lied to her. He was supposed to keep her from harm, he was supposed to protect her with everything he had. Instead, he had done the opposite. While she had given him a son, it had cost Katherine her life. The reward was great but the price had been too high. He sat with her, though she was completely lifeless, for a full day before he allowed them to take her body. It wasn't until then that more bad news was given to him. His baby's lungs had not been developed enough and he was having trouble breathing. He should have been with the tiny baby, not with his already gone wife. He had no idea he would have so few days with him.
From far in the castle, he could hear the cries of his new niece and the giggles of little Emily. Those sounds ripped him apart. Those sounds hurt worse than having a million swords cut through him. They were reminders of Bella, in a way. He thought of how she would look, fully pregnant. Could her slender body handle the stresses of carrying a child?
While he had not immediately fallen in love with Kate, he knew the second Bella stepped into the courtyard the day of the marriage that she was different than any other girl he had seen. The familiar cold that had settled into his bones since the loss of his family had momentarily died away. It was as if his heart was pumping warm blood through his veins for the first time in two months.
The fact that her father was ill was the only thing keeping him from not running after them, begging her to come back...begging her like she had begged him to allow her to stay. He was a selfish, heartless bastard. No wonder the heavens above hated him. Unable to be in the presence of the reminders of his son, he tried to go into Katherine's room and was unable to go there as well. There was no possible chance he could enter the room he had shared with Isabella. Bella. The beautiful girl who deserved more than what he could possibly give her.
Her birthday was only a few days away, according to what her father had told Father Daniels, and her gifts were sitting in his parents quarters, still in their boxes. Giving up on finding a particular room to break down in, he found the library couch and sank into it, despite the pain it brought him to be in there. He had to accept his fate, he had no choice. When he finally somewhat composed himself, he retrieved the gifts and unpacked them, figuring they did no good in their boxes. After dinner, which he ate in the library by himself, he went into the weapons room with a new determination. It was time to move on.
~EA~
After what felt like days of traveling, Isabella peeked around Jacob to see familiar sights. She tried to remember the day she left, her wedding day, and remembered her feelings of fear. Now, she felt just as scared to be returning home. She had good reason to be. They approached the path which led up to the small house they lived in and it took everything in her power to not run inside to her father. When the horse was finally stopped, she did not wait for Jacob to help her down, instead, she jumped down and grabbed her foot after landing on it funny.
Practically hopping into the dimly lit house, Isabella turned the corner to her father's bedroom and ran right into Miss Charlotte. "Sweet, Isabella! Oh my, look at you, child!"
Isabella's face lit up and she pulled the slightly chubby woman towards herself, wrapping her arms around her. "I've missed you so, Miss Charlotte! Oh, how I have missed you!"
"Still too thin but beautiful as always..." her voice trailed off and she glanced over to the closed door in front of them.
"How is he?" Isabella asked, realizing he could hear them in the hallway.
"Unwell, child. He is asleep now. The doctor has been in to see him already today. He will return tomorrow but nothing is changing. He is very ill, Isabella."
"May I see him?" she asked.
"Of course. He is expecting you."
That was all she needed. Pushing the door open, she looked down at the bed, taking in a man she barely recognized. Surely this could not be her father. He was white as a ghost. He had lost a lot of weight...too much weight. His hair was thinner and parts of his head were nearly bald. His hands were clenched and there was sweat running from his face. "Father?" she breathed.
"My...my Isabella..." he got out through his coughs.
"I wish you would have told me sooner that you were ill..."
"I wanted you...you to be happy..."
"I am sorry for what has happened with Edward..."
"What do you...mean? Jacob...he spoke with the man...on the horse. Jacob told me that he sent...correspondence to you...that you were coming here to see me..." He didn't know. Isabella was shocked. "Is he sick as well? Did he...did he accompany you?"
"No, father," she said, fighting to get her own words out. "He is fine. I came by myself..."
"Well, then...I will not keep you..."
"I am here to stay, until you are better," Isabella answered quickly.
He snorted softly, "There...is...no better. You should not have...to watch me..."
"I'm not leaving you," she said stubbornly, walking over and pouring him some water. "If there is no...better...as you feel there is not, I will be with you anyway until the end."
"This is no...no longer your place, Isabella. You belong in Seattle..."
"Seattle will be there for me after...when I feel it is time to return."
She watched as his eyes were having trouble staying open and smiled down at him tenderly. "Rest, father. I will get you some fresh water and when you awaken, I will help Miss Charlotte change your sheets."
"I love...you, Isabella."
"I know. Now rest."
Leaving the room, she closed the door behind her and leaned against it for a good many moments. Hurt for her father eventually gave way into anger with Jacob. Pushing past the kitchen, Isabella strode towards the stables. Jacob was discussing with Peter which provisions they would need to purchase for the horses on the next trip into town. "You! You...you...selfish...liar!"
Jacob turned to her, hurt evident on his face. "Isabelle..."
"Do not speak to me that way! Ever again! You have lied to me! Do you realize what you have done?"
"I have rescued you from a life of unhappiness...I have brought you home to your father..."
"You lied to me! You told me that my father wanted to accompany you! He had no idea that Edward did not want me..."
"After that guard came...the one from the castle...he explained that Master Cullen sent for me to retrieve you. He expressed that you were deeply unhappy and that returning here would be what you wanted...that there were people her that you missed...that it was what was best for you"
"It wasn't!"
"Then why did you leave?" Jacob demanded, obviously hurt and frustrated.
"My father is ill..."
"Then why did Edward lie? He is the one at fault, Isabelle, not me. Do you not remember what was? I thought that...I thought that you felt for me...as more than a friend. I had to come for you when I heard you were not happy with him and that he was willing to let you leave."
Out of frustration, Isabella kicked a gate to one of the stalls and bit back tears. When she had been whisked away to marry Edward, she felt as though she was being uprooted from her family and what she had known. Now, she felt even more lost after returning to that family and having to see them fall apart. "Isabelle, please..." Jacob said gently, stepping in front of her again.
"Oh, Jacob, he will not survive this will he?" she asked, tears flowing freely. The irony with this statement was that she could say the same for Edward as well as her father. She imagined what he must be doing now and that thought terrified her. Jacob pulled her into his chest and held her tightly.
"I'm afraid not, Isabelle, but you will never be alone. We can remain here. Together."
"I am still married in the eyes of the church..."
"If you are to become widowed..."
Isabella straightened in his arms, trying to push away that thought. "I am not! He is still very much alive!"
"You are upset. I understand. Allow me to help you settle in..."
"He is still alive, Jacob," she said again, this time slowly saying each word.
"I am sorry. I am tired, too. I should not have said that...I mean him no harm."
~EA~
The next day, Isabella awoke and walked into the tiny kitchen. Jacob was just setting a large, wild turkey on the table and Miss Charlotte was carrying a large pile of linens and heading towards her father's room. "Bless you, child!" she called out to Jacob. "We will finally have a decent meal..."
"I will go back now. Perhaps I can get us a deer..."
"Rest your bones, Jacob! I will soon start breakfast...I just need to see to Master Charles..."
"I will tend to breakfast, mam," Isabella spoke quietly. "Just allow me to help you with my father first..."
Seeing her father in what appeared to be even worse condition nearly killed her. He was sleeping, his breathing shallow as Miss Charlotte lifted his frail body. As she did so, Isabella pulled the soiled sheets from under him and spread out the new ones. She held her breath and tried to imagine that she was anywhere else. No, that wasn't true, she imagined herself at Edward's castle.
When they were finished, they left the room and Isabella allowed herself to cry. "Times are bad..." Isabella said aloud. She meant it to come out as a question but there was no question about it.
"Verily. I do not think he will be alive much longer..."
"Tis not just him. You are having trouble finding food."
Miss Charlotte just looked away, as if her dignity would not allow her to admit it. Guilt tore through Isabella as she thought of them, her family, sick and hungry while she lived in a large castle with a surplus of food. Her expensive dresses were probably the same cost of a month's worth of meats here in their smaller, rural village. It was no wonder why her father chose Edward over Jacob, there was nothing here for her...for any of them.
"Isabella? Isabella!" Alice squealed as she ran into the kitchen and took her friend in her arms, nearly knocking Jacob over in the process while he was trying to eat. "I have missed you so!"
"Ally! I am sorry I was unable to write...things were...hard sometimes." She felt horrible for acting as though she had it so bad.
"You better not allow it to happen after you return! I am so sorry to hear about your father! He has always been so kind to me and my mother."
"How is your mother?"
"Girls, please sit and eat. Isabella, you did not make all of this food just so that it could be wasted..."
"Sorry, mam," Isabella smiled, sitting down and pulling Alice along with her.
"Eat. When you are finished, you may go for a walk," Miss Charlotte smiled.
Alice began to explain that her mother was considering moving to live with Alice's aunt and uncle in Port Angeles. Isabella gulped down her food, offering her friend a few bites, and then they took off out the door. The decided to walk to the stables to say hello to Peter. "So what is he like? Is he rich? Is he handsome? Oh, I bet he is handsome!"
"He is very much handsome. He is taller than Jacob and is a little leaner. He has wonderful copper-colored hair and the most beautiful green eyes..."
"It must have been so hard for you to leave him! I shall have to meet him someday soon!"
"I do not know...that may not be possible, Ally," Isabella relented, picking at the button on her shirt sleeve.
"Oh, piddle! Surely he will be here if your father were to...never mind what I was going to say...Peter tells me that..."
"He's going to die, Alice. You do not have to lie for me. I can see for myself that he will not make it. As for Edward and I, I fear we will not make it either."
"What? Why not?"
"It was wrong. We never should have been married! Alice, his wife passed away just over two months ago while she was giving birth to his son. His son lived until three days later when he passed away because he could not breathe normally. They were just lost and I was given to him. Verily, he was not ready."
"Jacob loves you, Isabella. He told me so himself after you were taken away. He almost left for good but when your father became ill, he took things over for him. My mother has come to rely on him just as she once relied on your father and I fear Miss Charlotte and Peter now do as well..."
Isabella could remember her father telling her that Jacob could not provide for her as Edward could. The irony of this twisted her stomach. She was just about to tell her friend that she would do everything in her power to make things better, though she had no idea how that was going to work, when she spotted a man on horseback trotting along the property line. "Alice, who is that man?"
"Oh, that is Brutus. He is the guard your Edward sent to watch over us. I suppose he has not yet received orders to leave..."
Edward had stayed true to his word. Smiling slightly to herself, Isabella hooked her arm through Alice's. "Enough with this sadness. Have you found any suitors?"
~EA~
The girls talked and picked apples throughout the afternoon until Isabella felt the overwhelming need to be with her father. She chose to take a book and sit beside his bed. He was awake but it was hard for him to talk so she took his hand and read to him. She read for hours, having sworn his breathing was becoming more and more shallow by the minute. There was a brief time when she left to help Miss Charlotte prepare dinner and discuss a trip into town with Jacob so that they could purchase necessities. She knew there was very little money left and so she would take three of her books, hoping they would be able to trade them.
Shortly after dinner, Isabella returned to Charles. He was sleeping again and she noticed that his sheets needed changed desperately. Finding Miss Charlotte they went to work and he woke up just as she was picking up her book to read to him again. "My darling, I fear that...it will not be much longer. You must return to your husband, to your new life. You are...safe there."
"Father, I am safe here. Brutus is watching over us and we both know that Jacob will never allow anything to harm me."
"He...is a good man. I fear...when I pass on...he shall be responsible for Miss Charlotte. Alice's mother will not be turned...away...either. Perhaps returning to Seattle...perhaps it will lessen his burden, Isabella."
She wanted to scream, to cry, to tell him that she was not incapable of caring for herself. She would make it work...just as she was helping Jacob come up with ways to get what they needed from the village. She was not some uneducated woman, unable to at least help provide for herself. "I can be of great help here, father."
"Always...stubborn. You must return to your...husband."
"I am not leaving you. Not now. Now please, try to rest."
~EA~
The next morning, with she on one horse and Jacob on another, they went into town in search of what they needed. The village was busy but Isabella noticed something else as well. There seemed to be a nervous tension in the air. As if the townspeople were afraid that any intruder meant to bring them only harm. These were bad times.
"Isabella, stay close to me," Jacob called as he dismounted and came over to help her down.
She just nodded and followed him into a tiny shop. While Jacob haggled with the shopkeeper, Isabella noticed that there was a man staring at her. He had blonde hair, tied back with a piece of twine, and he looked powerful. That was the only way she could describe him. Stepping closer to Jacob, she heard the shopkeeper address her and she snapped her head towards that direction. "Are you not royalty now?"
She swallowed hard, trying to figure out what the appropriate response would be. Explaining that she was but she was no longer married...nor did she have money...really did not seem to be what this man wanted to hear. In the end, they had no other choice but to give two of the three books in exchange for some bread. Tea was now going to be a luxury they could not afford.
On the way out of the store, Jacob seemed upset and Isabella frowned. It was no secret that people were watching them, including the creepy man who even followed them out. As if wanting something to distract himself with, Jacob said, "Brutus informed me that they are sending another guard from the castle. Brutus is being sent home."
"We will have to thank him before he leaves."
"I only wish there was something we could offer him..."
"I am sure Edward will make sure he is rewarded."
"I am happy that you are here with us but Charles is right. Edward has the means to care for you...I fear that I do not..."
~EA~
Three more days passed and Charles Swan was still holding on. Instead of sleeping soundly through the night, Isabella would wake up three or four times to go in and see to him. She made sure he had fresh water and did her best to keep him clean. Four days after their trip into town, Isabella checked on him one morning to discover blood around his lips. He had been taking coughing fits throughout the night and she knew it would not be much longer. Miss Charlotte had been with him sporadically throughout the night as well and understood when Isabella refused to come to breakfast.
She did not feel very much like eating, but when Miss Charlotte brought her lunch and dinner, she ate a small amount before setting her tray on the floor beside her hard chair. Charles was still breathing but he had not said more than a few words to her since the night before. Just after Miss Charlotte came to take her tray, she rushed back in, a concerned look on her face. "Miss Brandon and a man are here to see you."
Wiping the tears from her eyes, she walked curiously out to meet them. Jacob obviously took over the role of the protector as he stood in front of them, talking with seriousness to the man. Isabella was worried at first, then she saw who it was. She remained worried but for other reasons. This was Edward's own guard...his best friend...his voice of reason. "Jasper?" she asked, stepping around Jacob with curiosity.
We're still depressed...I know. That is just how this is going to go for now. I do promise that things will begin to get better but we're definitely not out of the woods yet. Thank you so, so much for all of your support and feedback, it keeps this whole project going. It gives it purpose. Please continue and I'll send you a preview of the next chapter. I hope you appreciated the bit of Edward's point of view. :) The next chapter should be up sometime this week but with the holidays coming up, it won't be until later in the week...probably Thursday as a Thanksgiving treat. Speaking of, Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate!
Oh, and how can I not add, Breaking Dawn was amazing! I can't wait to see it for the third time this week! I won't give away any spoilers for those who don't want to hear anything but I have to say that possibly my favorite part was when Bella comes out in the black lingerie to entice Edward. Rob's reaction was the sweetest, you're-killing-me reaction EVER! I could see our dear Rob doing the same in real life ;)