Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and the characters that make it amazing. I'm just borrowing them for a little while.

Chapter 14

Revelations

The night of the ball finally arrived. Though some anxiously waited for it, happy to be attending, some others—including Isabella herself, were waiting anxiously to get it over with. Rosalie, though, was absolutely beaming. Everyone seemed in good spirits at breakfast, though she could not bring herself to look into Edward's eyes...and he was avoiding her as well. Since the first night she had come to his room at night, she continued to do so even though they were not actually speaking to each other. He never said anything and neither did she.

The girls pulled dress after dress for Alice but Rosalie was much curvier and Isabella did not have many offer. The ones bought for her were too slim for Alice, which raised another red flag—she had been losing weight since she came to the castle to begin with. To their surprise, Tanya ended up loaning Alice a dress that belonged to her and it fit Alice well enough. Alice looked amazing no matter what she wore and Isabella suspected that Jasper would adore Alice even if she was to only wear a paper sack.

Esme came into Rosalie and Emmett's room where they were all getting ready and smiled at Isabella. Rosalie already had her hair done up in a knot and Alice wore her short bob down and curled. "Isabella, will you allow me to braid your hair?"

"Of course, Esme. Let's go back to my room. I need to retrieve my dress."

They made their way to Isabella room and Alice got her dress set out on the bed while Isabella sat and let Esme brush her hair. With the first brush stroke, memories of her mother doing the same thing for her came to mind. Some of Isabella's best memories of her mother were the times they would sit and talk while her mother brushed her hair. She fought tears, realizing that now that her father was gone, she truly had no blood-related family left. Their legacy ended with her. There was no male to carry on their name and Isabella realized that there may never be even grandchildren to carry on the genes. It made her frown and Esme must have noticed the heavy silence.

"So, have you spoken to Edward lately?"

Isabella blushed red at the thoughts of her late night trysts with him, as she suspected he knew that she was there. Then again, they had been married. She could not figure out the appropriate methods for such an act after having been married and then having that marriage annulled. Her mind spun and she rolled her eyes at herself. "He says that he cares for me."

"And do you care for him?"

"I do," Isabella said cautiously. "I just do not know how true he is to his word. I know things were...different for us...but I had fallen in love with him. I still do very much love him but I have no family, Esme. I'm afraid of him pushing me out of this one again."

"Now, Isabella," Esme stopped brushing and said in a chastising tone, "regardless of what happens between you and my son, you were at one time legally my daughter and I fear that I can not emotionally allow that title to go. Carlisle and I will always consider you as part of our family."

Isabella practically beamed as she heard Esme use the nickname she had grown to love. "That means a lot to me."

"I only hope that you can come to know him as he used to be. A younger Edward..." Esme said wistfully, setting the brush down and coming to stand in front of her, leaning against the vanity "...he was so brave. He was always willing to help but he never wanted to be the center of attention. His humble kindness always made the young ladies swoon though it seems that he never noticed. When he was with his brothers, the men he served with, he was so at ease. I worried for him but knew that he was trying to help others...and that he had friends who would help keep him safe, just as he would help them. Jasper still refuses to leave his side..."

"He has been with Jasper for a long time, then?" Isabella asked.

"Oh, yes. I believe Edward would have been knighted as well had he not met Katherine."

"What did you think of their relationship?"

"To be honest? I suppose I worried that she would take him from his dreams...I had no idea at the time that...well...he explained that he wanted to be a husband and father. It gave him reason to keep fighting, to know he was helping his own family and not just strangers."

Isabella watched as Esme looked up to the heavens, a sad smile on her face appeared as a tear fell. "He told me that he would still be able to provide for her, that they had a plan because Garrett Denali refused to allow them to marry. It was a shocker when he died. I do believe that's the first time that Edward realized what he could be responsible for. Katherine assured him that he would not become successor...the Lord knows that man who did become successor is much worse than our Edward would have been..."

She trailed off and Isabella nodded, "Edward wants to fight for the state. He says he needs to help protect the citizens..."

"Bella, sweet girl, those lines have been crossed. There is no right and wrong side. My son knows that. He will fight for what he believes is right, for what is right, because that is who he is."

"Will I ever see that person that he used to be? Will he always be haunted like this?"

"Bella, he was much worse before he met you. You are fixing him. I know it is not fair to you and I know that he may never be that same carefree, brave boy that married for love...both times...but I truly believe, now that he has you, he at least has the chance to be happy again."

~EA~

"Holy heavens!" gasped Alice, gawking at Isabella as Esme tied up the back of her dress. Self-consciously, Isabella reached up and touched her hair gently. It was done in one long braid that Esme pulled so it fell beside her neck, over her left shoulder, and ended just above her heart. Esme has also braided a soft, satin, yellow ribbon into her mahogany hair.

"She is quite the lovely lady," Esme said softly, coming around to stand in front of Isabella. Rosalie knocked on the door and came in with Emily, who was beaming at Isabella. "Bella! You look so pretty!"

"Thank you, Emily."

"Em, do you have something you would like to ask Bella?" Rosalie prompted gently.

Her little face became determined then, as if trying to remember something very important, "Master Cullen...Master Cullen would want...would like...Miss Swan..."

Emily looked to Rosalie then, obviously frustrated and Rosalie just laughed a little. "You don't have to say it exactly right..."

"But Uncle Eddie..."

"Just ask her, Emily!" Rosalie nodded in encouragement.

"Uncle Edward wants you to go with him!" the little girl blurted out.

Isabella could not help but laugh and bent down to hug the child. "Sweet heart, can you give him a message for me?"

Emily nodded excitedly, "He looks pretty, too!"

"Handsome," Rosalie correct, bursting into even more laughter, "men are handsome, not pretty."

"Can you tell him that I promise to save him the first and last dance. Can you do that for me?"

Emily nodded again and skipped out of the room. Before following her, Rosalie smiled and said, "Edward, Jacob, and Tanya are planning to travel with us. Alice, Jasper is wishing to accompany you and Isabella. Isabella, are you sure you do not wish to attend with Edward?"

"I feel that it is not a time to be public with our relationship to that extreme. Give him my best. I truly do look forward to dancing with him."

"I will. See you shortly. Oh, and not many people actually know of the situation. It has been such a short time that it has happened and your father was ill. Many believe you returned home for that purpose, still very much married to Edward. Try to not worry about what everyone will think."

By the time they did last minute checks on their gowns, hair, and cloaks, Carlisle and Jasper were the only two left in the dining hall. Well, Siohban was there, watching after the two little ones. Both men regarded all three women lovingly and Alice blushed a deep scarlet when Jasper pulled her close and kissed her deeply. "Alright," Carlisle spoke, "let us get these beauties to their ball."

~EA~

They were just stepping into their own carriage when the other one began to cross the bridge. Immediately, Isabella regretted her decision to not go with them. Tanya would be traveling with Edward...and that thought was not too pleasant. Esme seemed to notice her unease and idle chit chat continued until they pulled up to a large mansion on the other side of the village. Carriages were dropping it's occupants off at the front door and their carriage was no exception. Staying close to Esme and Carlisle, Isabella fought to blend in but she seemed to be failing miserably.

Their large group was introduced as they arrived and Isabella wondered where Edward had ended up. Jessica would surely be in attendance. Becoming angry with herself, she snuck away to speak with Rosalie, who was talking to Aundrea Webber. If she was going to take things slow with Edward, she could not keep him all to herself.

A wonderful string quartet played from the back of the mansion and Isabella wondered how large the place actually was. The floors were covered in a plush red carpet until you came to the dance floor which was a magnificent, white marble. It was not lost on her that Brutus seemed to be following her around and Jacob soon found her as well.

"You look beautiful, Isabelle."

Jacob was wearing fancier clothes than she had ever seen him in and she could not help but smile. "You look wonderful as well, Jacob."

"May I have a dance tonight?"

"Of course. The first and last have already been promised but one in between is yours."

He bowed slightly to her before walking off to join Tanya by the refreshment area. "Can you imagine? Oh, Isabella, look at this!" Alice cried. "To think of how little we had only a few weeks ago...and now this...it is verily breathtaking! I will have to remember to write to my mother about these outings..."

Isabella was happy for her friend's happiness. "Have you told her about Jasper yet?"

"Oh, yes. I told her before we even left that I thought he was lovely. I have not told her of our impending engagement..."

"I am so happy for you!" Then, as the music began to grow louder and someone close to the back announced something, people around her begun to dance. It had begun, the first dance, and she was alone. It seemed that there were ballgowns everywhere, swirling and sliding to the music. Seconds later, Jasper swooped in and took Alice to the dance floor with him. Lonely, Isabella stood almost in the middle of it all and peered down at the hem of her dress, wondering if this was a bad idea.

It was then that she saw him. He was standing on the upper balcony, looking down at her, his eyes full of wonder. Glancing behind her, she realized no one was really in his line of vision that was not already dancing with someone. It may have been her imagination but she could almost see him begin to breathe a little heavier before making his way towards the grand staircase. As soon as he touched the bottom step, her own heart beat picked up and increased even more with each step he took towards her. "Edward..."

"Bella, you look...you look..."

Isabella laughed and her inner being smiled at the fact that he was at a loss for words. With a grin of her own she said,"You don't look so bad yourself, love."

A smile blossomed on his face at the way she addressed him and in the next instant, he pulled her close to him and they began to dance. It was not the formal, uptight, dances that many other unmarried couples were doing. He just held her close and rocked her back and forth. Clasping him desperately, every emotion that she had felt since she left the castle with Jacob came back to her and she realized she was holding her breath. She tried to remind herself that he was here, he was holding her, and he wanted a second chance. "Bella, baby, it's okay now."

She frowned, he must have known why she was clinging to him so tightly, she was trying to keep herself together. A hot tear slid down her cheek and she hated herself for it. This was not the appropriate place or time to break. "Edward, I'm sorry...I can not...not right now. I need to step outside..."

Forcing herself to let him go, she walked with her head down towards the grand entrance and out into the cold, winter night. Lifting her dress as best as she could, she made her way over to a small building on the property that looked like a storage barn. Opening the door, she realized she was right and let herself fall into a stack of hay, tears now pouring. It was okay in as many ways as it was wrong. The fact that Edward was home was the only thing her heart was screaming at her but her mind was chastising her for feeling so happy after the loss of her father.

Jacob was drifting away from her, Alice was moving on as well, her father was gone, and Edward was giving up on a life of royal riches...to be with her. It made no sense. All of this made no sense. Until just recently, Isabella could have gone back to Forks, spent time with her friends, visited her and Alice's childhood homes, spend time with her healthy father, and still be married to Edward. The changes she had been put through so suddenly and so violently twisted her soul and made cry harder. Wind slammed the side of the small shed and she was grateful for the privacy of it. No one could hear her cries.

She must have sat for almost twenty minutes before she heard them. First, it was Edward's voice, then Emmett's, and last Jacob's. They were calling for her, and they sounded so far away, but soon the door to the storage barn was wrenched open. "Thank the Lord!" Jacob gasped, then sucked in another breath when he saw her condition. She looked down at her hands, the idea of how pitiful she must look made her sick. He did not approach her though, he gave her a sad smile and backed out.

"Edward! Over here! There were footprints!" he said by way of explanation.

Less than a second later, Edward nearly knocked Jacob out of the way of the door frame and strode over to her. Embarrassed, she kept her eyes on the floor in front of her and began to cry harder. Her body was completely betraying her. "Bella, look at me. Please, please, look at me. I am never going to be able to make this right..." he said this last part as if to himself, the self-hatred was returning.

"No," Isabella choked out, his hands were on her shoulders and she shoved against his chest. All of the hurt and anger she felt towards him came pouring out before she even knew what was happening. "No! You can not make me leave again! How could you push me away? How could you do this to me? You said you loved me but how could you force us to go against the church? How could you dislike me that much if you loved me? Why did you do this?"

With each question she brought her small fists against his chest but she knew she was not hurting him, at least not physically. "I needed you! I do not love Jacob! I thought I did but that went away when I met you! Could you not see how much I loved you? How much I needed you?"

He did not say anything, though she had no idea what he possibly could have said to calm her down. Instead, he took her fists and instead of allowing them to beat him on the chest, he forced her to wrap them around him so they were holding onto each other again. He turned with her, so that he could sit down on the hay, and pulled her down onto his lap. His one hand stayed at her waist, holding her there, while the other cupped her face as he held her like a small child.

"I miss him, Edward," she choked out, grabbing the collar of his suit and pulling herself closer to him.

"I know, Bella, I know how it feels to lose someone who is your entire world..."

"You were my entire world!" Isabella corrected him. "I love and miss my father but it was not him who meant everything. It was you! In that short amount of time I came to know you, you were everything! Kate never would have pushed you away! She would never have hurt you that way!"

Isabella felt his arms tighten even more around her, for a second she worried that her lungs could not even get air, but then she felt something even more upsetting. Tears-not hers but his. Guilt began to set in and exhaustion was overwhelming her. She thought saying those words would make her feel better, would be her way of getting her revenge. Now, she hated herself possibly more than he hated himself. She knew then that there was absolutely no way she was going to be able to live without him. Isabella could tell herself and everyone else that she did not love him enough to forgive him and give them both a second chance at each other until the day she died, but it would all be lies. Every bit of it was untrue.

"Edward?" she asked quietly, hoping that he would still accept her after what she had just said to him. He looked down at her, a look of fear on his face. "I am sorry, too. Please, I did not mean what I have said. You love Kate and I know that this is hard for you. I just need to know that you accept that she is gone and I am here now. I want this with you, I want a second chance, not just for you but for me. I need you, though. I am here. Right now. I need you now. You can not leave me...I can not lose you again!"

She thought of what she was saying. If she did this, it meant losing Jacob, starting fresh in a new life with Edward, possibly never having a child of her own, and so many other things that made her head spin. None of this is what she had planned on. It scared her that she did not care.

"Never," he managed to get out. Swallowing hard, he kissed her forehead. "Never again will I push you away. Please, I will do anything. We can go back to Forks, we can make a home for ourselves there. Bella, I'm just scared about starting a family...I can not condemn you to what happened with Katherine. You can see Alice whenever you want...and even Jacob—but I am a jealous man, so I will have to pretend that I won't let you..."

Isabella laughed at his last admission and snuggled into him. Was he really willing to leave Seattle? Of course he was planning to leave the castle but to move the whole way to Forks was a big deal. They would be much farther from where his parents were going than if they stayed. He would also be a long trip away from Kate and Garrett. Starting a family? Did he mean he was against it completely or just scared of it happening?

Edward spoke again, "I will do anything. Whatever it takes to keep you with me, no matter where we are, I just want us to be together."

"Would you really be willing to leave here? What about visiting...with Kate? You are not going to be able to..."

"What is buried under the ground is a body, Isabella. Kate will always be with me in some way. She is with me now, trying to help me. She's looking down at us and I know if she could, she would tell us that this is okay. I did not understand this before but I understand it now. She is gone. You are here. That is what matters and I need you. I am afraid that you will leave. The way you left that morning with Jacob, without even a goodbye..."

"You wanted me to leave! You called upon Jacob to take me! Besides, I had to leave while I could. If I had stayed for another minute I do not know that I would have had the strength to do so!"

"Your father was ill!"

"That is the only reason I left!"

"Even though Jacob was there, ready to take you home?"

"If I wanted Jacob, I would not be sitting here with you. I would not be sneaking into your room every night just to be close to you! I can not lose you. If we try again, you can not leave me."

"I promise. Bella, I promise you, I will do anything."

"Edward, you are so complicated! One minute you would say you wanted me and the next you were begging me to leave! I want this, though, if you do. I've missed you so much. "

~EA~

Once her breathing returned to normal, she relaxed against him and just reveled in the fact that she was in his arms again. He eventually looked her in the eyes, "Do you want to go back? I am sure the others are worried..."

Rubbing her own dried tears from her cheeks, she reddened. "I look awful..."

"You are still the most beautiful woman here, Bella."

"I do not feel as such."

"Are you interested in going back to the ball at all?"

"Not really. No."

"Then I have an idea. Will you wait here?"

She frowned but nodded, watching him walk away. After about five minutes, he returned. "Your carriage awaits, beauty."

She took his hands and he helped pull her up before leading her out the doors. The snow was falling heavily and Edward wrapped an arm around her. "Come on, Bells! I'll race you!"

Isabella laughed as he let her go and jogged backwards, his eyes never leaving her face. She couldn't stop the giggle that rose in her throat as she lifted the bottom of her dress and began to sprint. She pushed past him and just as she was about to reach the carriage, the ground dipped down and Isabella's foot went right through the snow. About to take a tumble, she braced herself to hit the ground. Before she knew what was happening, Edward was pulling her back up and towards him. His eyes were bright-eyed and she believed he looked happy. It was infectious.

Holding her to himself with one arm, he reached forward and put his palm flat against the carriage. "What do I win?"

Her laughing ceased at the seriousness in his gaze, his eyes had darkened, and she could feel her blood running though her veins. In a second, he was leading her into the carriage and the second they were inside and away from prying eyes, her mouth found his. He was sitting on the seat and she stood in front of him, between his legs. With his hands holding her there by her waist, she practically had to let him hold her up. He tasted so good, his hands warm against her sides, and she realized that he could probably feel her bones...just as Jacob had.

Pulling away, she sat down beside him and placed her hands on her lap. Edward yelled out to whoever was driving that they were ready to go and the carriage began to move. "I apologize. I did not mean to be so forward...it was inappropriate."

"I think I may have started it," Isabella said with a sad smile.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked, running his hands through his hair.

"No! No. It is just that Jacob told me that he could feel my bones and..." Edward seemed angry with this news. Isabella's eyes grew wide at what she must have implied. "I have not been with him. I would never..."

"That's not what I am upset about, Isabella. Why did you not eat while I was away?"

"I did eat when you were away...some...I just lost my father. I had no appetite and I thought you were gone for good. I know you love your family and that you would eventually be back but it wouldn't be for me..."

"That gives you a reason to starve yourself?"

"I am sorry I told you," she said, trying not to cry. He was practically yelling at her.

Immediately, his face softened and he took her hands, which were twisted in her lap. Flattening them out, he left his hands rest on top of them and kissed her cheek. "I never want to see you not take care of yourself. Do you understand me? It is so easy to get sick during this season and not eating or not getting rest will not help matters. You saw how quickly your father was taken from us, you know what happened with Katherine, and yet you still choose to disregard your own health?"

She did not know what to say, so she sat with his hand over both of hers and leaned into his side. Knowing there was no way to defend herself, she whispered that she was sorry and that she understood. The rest of the ride was quiet and she found that they were both relaxed again as they made their way over the bridge. "The others will not be returning for probably a few hours..."

"Will people talk about us leaving together? Does everyone know?"

"I do not think that they really know the truth, there is no way for them to know of the annulment unless one of us or Father Daniels said something. Most believe we are still married and those that do not are probably being dismissed for gossip. Now, you run in and get warm. I shall help with the horses and come find you shortly."

~EA~

Siohban and the children were no where to be seen and Isabella stood in front of the large fireplace in the dining hall, warming her hands and feet. Once she was thoroughly warm, and there was still no sign of them or Edward, she decided to make her way back outside to find him. When there were no torches lit by the stables, she pulled her cloak around herself and headed off towards the cemetery. Upon her arrival, she stopped at the gate and watched him, wondering if perhaps she should go back.

Edward was on one knee in front of Katherine's grave, and arm rested on that knee and his head was in his hand. Realizing there was no way she could even look away, Isabella kept watch, waiting for him. She would wait all night if she had to. This was a part of him that she had to accept. After a few moments, he lifted his head and nodded, as if affirming something unheard and stood. He touched the top of her stone before doing the same to Garretts and turned around. When he saw Isabella, he strode over to her and at first she thought he was angry.

"I'm sorry..."

She realized then that he was upset, not with her, but with himself. "I understand, Edward. I am not trying to replace her."

He stepped closer to her and kissed her cheek, it was so much more of an intimate feeling than when he kissed her forehead and she felt herself lean into him automatically. "You look so beautiful tonight, Bella. I meant what I said. No other woman could compete. You aren't her, and regardless of what I may have implied, I don't ever want you to change yourself to be like her or anyone else. There are things that are alike and different about both of you and I love you. Of course it still hurts. It sometimes feels like I'm being ripped in half but the fact that I want you, even with that feeling, I know that letting you leave was a horrible idea. Come on, let's go inside."

On the way back, Isabella looked up at him from his side. His arm was around her and their hips were touching as they navigated the snow. "Do you think anyone will be upset that we left?"

"Does it matter?" he asked with a smirk. "You were not happy there and neither was I."

"Oh, no!" Isabella realized that Jacob had been promised a dance—and she verily had already broken that promised. Edward stopped immediately. "I'm sorry...I promised Jacob that I would dance with him..."

A strange expression crossed Edward's face and he frowned a little. "Do you regret leaving?"

"No. I just feel kind of bad."

"Well, if it is of any consolation, he seemed to be enjoying himself with a certain princess..."

"Jacob Black and Tanya Denali..." Isabella said, irony heavy in her voice.

"Who would have thought," shrugged Edward.

When they entered the dining hall, there was still no one around and Edward lead her over to the fireplace. She shrugged off the cloak and he took it, carefully laying it over a table to dry. She found herself walking over and standing closely behind him, as if her life depended on his closeness. When he righted himself and turned back around, he seemed slightly taken aback by her nearness but instead of saying anything about it, just pulled her close to him and breathed deeply. "I never got my last dance, beauty."

"Edward?"

"Yeah?" he asked her, his tone sounding completely content.

"I do not plan to have our last dance for many, many, many years."

He tensed then, holding her at arms length now. "Oh?"

"I want a second chance, too. You said I deserved to make my own decision on this." Then, a small smile played across her lips. "Will you marry me...again, Edward?"

"Are you proposing marriage to me, Bella?" He asked, completely surprised and rather amused.

"I believe so," she responded

"I believe 'tis customary for the man to ask the woman...but as we both know very well, nothing about us has ever been customary," he shook his head, a puzzled smile crossed his face.

"Is that a yes, Master Cullen?" Isabella asked playfully before adding, "I do not have all day."

Edward shook his head and laughed, his laughter sounded so good to her, she could not believe how content she felt as well. Dropping to his knees in front of her, he pulled her towards him so that his head was resting against her belly and she was hugging him. "Then in that case, Miss Swan, I would be honored."

When he finally stood up, he pulled her towards him again and his hands came to rest on her ribs. "This will never do, Bella. No wife of mine will go hungry. To think that Jacob noticed..." his hands tightened on her and for a moment she prayed that he would not ruin the mood. Instead, a small smile came to his lips and he kissed her again before saying, "In fact, no wife of mine will be touched in a way such as this by any man other than me...even this Jacob Black."

"He only hugged me, Edward. Nothing has happened between us."

"I know, and believe it or not, I am grateful of the way he is with you. He was there for you when I was not. There is something, though. He asked me when I first returned if you and I were still married..."

Isabella's breath caught, she could remember telling Jacob that the night they were in the stables together, when he had first hinted at his intentions of marrying her himself. A part of her wanted to believe it was true, that her leaving was temporary, but she knew in her heart that it was over...that Edward would have gone through with the annulment. It had been the only thing she could come up with to turn Jacob down, besides the fact that she loved Edward more. Jacob had been far too good to her.

"Breathe, beauty. It did happen," he said it as if that was good news. Looking down, she closed her eyes, even though they would soon be husband and wife again, it still hurt. "I did not want to make things more difficult for you if you chose to become Jacob's..."

"Do not say it. I do not want that and this is something you must remember, Edward. Perhaps at one time I thought of it but then I met you and you changed...everything. You said that if this was a different time, that maybe things would have worked out the first time, but I think this was supposed to happen. I had to be there for my father...and Tanya does deserve to be here. Alice and Jasper...Jacob and Tanya...Edward, I think this was all meant to happen."

"So you wouldn't change anything?"

"No, I suppose not," Isabella mused.

"Well," Edward said, kissing her chastely and then looking her in the eyes. "Let's never go through it again, okay?"

I told you all to have faith! There will only be one more chapter after this and I apologize to those who wanted it to continue. When I planned it out, this is about where I expected it to end and this is where it will stay. This was meant to be a fun, almost experimental project for me and I enjoyed writing it as much as I hope you enjoyed reading it! The story's conclusion should be posted either Sunday or Monday. I know it is a day more than usual but 'tis the season for stress. Lol. Thank you for the support and please review. I'll still send a preview and I'm still writing 15 so if you want to see something specific in it, if it fits, I'd be happy to try to work it in. Lots of love, Letzigprincess xx