Chapter Four

Darkness fell around them, and Lorne had still not returned with the Jumper. The air was chilly as it blew inside the tent, raising goose bumps on Sheppard's arms and legs. Quietly, he pushed himself up to a sitting position and then sneaked toward the front door, careful not to wake Teyla, who slept near the door. He had almost made it outside when Molly squawked, and Teyla's head jerked up. She immediately saw Sheppard, his torso already on the other side of the tent, and she cleared her throat just loudly enough to let him know that he'd been caught.

Sheppard's messy hair ducked back inside, a sheepish smile on his face. "Hey, there," he greeted her.

At first, all she did was raise her eyebrow at him. Then, she asked, "Where do you think you were going?"

"Um…" he scratched the back of his head. "The, uh, facilities?"

As her eyebrow arched ever higher, he blew out a breath and said, "The bathroom, Teyla. Gotta pee like a racehorse."

Finally, she understood, and got to her feet. "Oh. Do you need help?"

"No!" he nearly shouted. "No, I think I can manage, thank you. Just…if you could, give me a light? It's pretty dark out."

Even before he finished speaking, he heard her rustling around, and then something cold and metallic touched his hand. As his fingers curled around the slick, rounded shape, he realized it was a flashlight, and he soon found the button that switched it on. He aimed the beam outside, its light a round, white circle on the dirt just beyond the tent door, and shuffled painfully through the flaps. Teyla watched him carefully, gasping when he nearly tripped on the lower flap of the door. She followed him outside, her hands wrapped over her bare shoulders and her teeth trying not to chatter in the cool night air. He glanced down and noticed that her feet were also bare, her toes painted a pretty shade of pale pink.

"I will wait for you here," she assured him, and he nodded and made his way into the surrounding trees. He returned a few minutes later, breathing a deep sigh of relief, the light from the torch bobbing around on the ground in front of him. His leg must have begun to ache again, as he was limping slightly, but Teyla held her peace. She knew that if she brought it up, he would only brush off her concern, giving her his best roguish smile.

He had almost made it to her side when he tripped over a hidden root, and stumbled forward. He fell hard against her and they both toppled to the ground, with her underneath him. At first, they were so startled that neither of them moved. Then Teyla giggled nervously, and he could not keep from joining her. Soon they were both laughing loudly, building to hysteria when he failed numerous awkward attempts at standing up with his injured leg.

When they had settled down again, Sheppard's gaze turned soft, and he gently brushed a dirty leaf from her cheek. Her breath hitched in her chest as his fingers grazed her skin, and her brown eyes blinked slowly, watching his every move. Time seemed to slow to a crawl; in the beam of the flashlight, she could see each hair at his forehead move as they ruffled in the cool breeze, and she smelled the crisp scent of the grass underneath her, felt each exhale of his warm breath on her face. She longed to reach up and trail her fingers down the side of his scrubby-bearded face, but she forced herself to remain still. Though they were only mere centimeters apart, his eyes were guarded, his thoughts hidden from even her most perceptive probing.

"Sorry," he finally said, his voice oddly breathless. "Goddamn trees are tryin' to kill me."

She smiled at this. "It is all right, John."

"You hurt?"

"No." Though she shook her head, her eyes never left his. "Are you?"

"Nope. Well, except my leg, but it was already like that."

He managed to scramble backward off her, and she pushed herself upright. Rather than stand, however, she merely crossed her legs and sat in the grass, far from eager to return to the tent just yet. Sheppard picked idly at the dew-covered blades, suddenly at a loss for words. There was so much he wanted to say, but nothing sounded just right, and it left him feeling frustrated.

Teyla was the one to break the silence. "I am glad that I found you. I was so afraid when I saw you lying there on the beach. I thought…"

"I know. I'm glad, too," he interrupted. He didn't want to hear her say the words. He didn't even want to think about what had almost happened.

She fell silent and just watched him, her dark eyes wide, curious. When she suddenly shivered, he said, "We should get back inside, get some sleep."

"In a moment, perhaps," she agreed hesitantly. "The night is so beautiful. I wanted to enjoy it for a little while longer."

She shivered again, and he chuckled. "You can't enjoy it if you're shivering like that."

"I am fine."

Without another word, he slid over until he was beside her, and she leaned her shoulder against him. The hair on his bare chest tickled her skin, but he was warm, and she glanced up and gave him a grateful smile. He grinned back at her, the dimple on his right cheek deepening ever so slightly, and she found herself once more holding her breath. Even in the poor light, despite the bruises and scrapes, his face was so handsome that she could barely control her thoughts.

"You know," he said then, right at her ear, "I almost named the bird after you."

His words were so unexpected that Teyla burst out laughing. "Really?" She asked finally.

He nodded. "Yep. She kept squawking at me, just like you do when I go and do something dumb and get hurt."

"Yes, well," she replied, "you often deserve it."

He nudged her playfully at that. "Only because I'm such a Big Damn Hero." She rolled her eyes, but the smile on her lips told him all he needed to know. His eyes returned to their former, serious expression. "Of course, if she hadn't been there for me, I would've been dead. Just like you've been here for me now, and so many other times before."

Without thinking, she reached down and grasped his hand in hers, lightly squeezing his fingers. Just as thoughtlessly, he lifted her hand to his mouth and gently kissed her knuckles, then set both of their twined hands back on her lap. His brow furrowed then, and he asked, "Where the hell is Lorne?"

Teyla shook her head. "I am not sure. He has been gone a long time." Her eyes scanned the black forest beyond. "I hope he has not gotten into trouble."

"You have your radio?"

"Yes, in the tent." She moved to rise, but his hand tightened around hers.

"Just wait a minute."

She looked up at him, his features upside down from this angle, and frowned in confusion. "But I thought…"

"We'll try and contact him, yeah. But it's so quiet here. It's…" he swallowed against the panic rising in his bruised chest. Feelings and Sheppard went together like oil and water, and this particular type sent him into a very special variety of flailing helplessness. Forcing his voice to stay level, he said, "It's nice, being here with you."

Her frown softened, her lips curving upward now, and she leaned back against him, her hair tickling his nose. "It is nice being here with you, as well."

"Somehow, I think you're just being nice. It can't have been too fun, dragging my unconscious body all the way up here..."

Teyla shook her head. "John, you are far too modest sometimes. We are teammates, friends. It is always my honor to be able to care for you."

He peered down into her eyes again, and saw the honesty held within them. Her openness surprised him, and he found himself stuffing the panicked feeling back down, only this time it was not so strong. It mingled with a different sensation – a warm tingling that started in his stomach and ran both up his body and down simultaneously. This feeling he recognized all too well, and though it felt good to entertain it, he carefully shoved it back, too. She had said it herself, after all: they were friends. Good friends, very close friends, actually, but that was all they were. All they would be. Oh, he wanted more – the wild beating of his heart was proof enough of that – but he would not jeopardize their friendship over his physical desire, no matter how hot it burned in him.

"John?" he heard her ask then, and he blinked.

"Yeah."

Her hand went to his cheek, her cool fingertips pressing into his skin, lightly scratching his stubble. She grinned at the feel of his prickly beard, but when she saw the battle raging in his gaze, her smile faded.

"What is wrong?"

He licked his lips and stared up at the red moon overhead. "Nothing."

Teyla pushed away from him and turned around, so that she was kneeling in front of him. Placing her hands on either side of his outstretched legs, she shook her head. "I do not believe you." She scooted forward on her knees, the equivalent of a single step. "Tell me, please."

Sheppard leaned back, nervously searching for an escape. When he found none, he sighed in resignation. "I...I was just thinkin' about TJ, is all. About how he must miss you, and how I'm keepin' you out here, away from him."

"But you are not. I came out here on my own, because I was afraid for you." She sat back on her heels, and he straightened as well. "Besides, Torren has many caregivers on Atlantis. He will be just fine until we return."

Her eyebrow lifted in her trademark way, and she tipped her head to the side. "That is not what you were thinking about, however. Is it?"

Damn her perceptive nature, he thought. Aloud, he said, "No. I was really thinking about that time when I almost turned into a Wraith-bug."

Now she was even more curious. "What of it?"

He went back to playing with the grass, pulling it up three and four blades at a time, and then by handfuls that he pushed into the shape of a bird's nest, sticking his hand in the middle to hollow it out. At length, he asked, "Do you remember that day in the gym, the first and last time I actually pinned you for a change?"

Teyla nodded, subconsciously touching her fingers to her lips. She could almost feel the way they had tingled when he had kissed her that afternoon, his tongue thrusting possessively against hers as he greedily tasted her. Though she had resisted at first, it was only because she had been caught off-guard. She would be lying if she said that part of her had not enjoyed it at all.

"Yes," she managed, just above a whisper. She cleared her throat. "Yes, I do remember."

"Well, I know I apologized for taking advantage of you like that, but..."

She waited for more than a few moments, allowing him to speak at a pace he would be comfortable with. If she pushed him, she knew he would clam up, stuff his emotions back into whatever dark place in his mind that he kept them. It was usually best to just listen, even if it sometimes took an hour for him to say something anyone else could have said in five minutes. This time, however, when he did not finish his sentence, she reached out and lightly touched his hand.

"But what, John?"

He jolted at her touch, as if she had electricity running through her veins, and then seemed to recall that he had stopped speaking in the middle of a sentence. "Oh," he said, "right. Well, the honest truth is that I wasn't sorry."

As her lifted eyebrow traveled higher, he stuttered out, "Wait, wait, that's not what I meant. I mean, I was sorry that I was so rough with you, and I didn't even try to find out if you wanted me to kiss you. But I wasn't sorry I kissed you. It was...I liked it."

He watched as she did her best dumbstruck-Rodney impression, his pulse accelerating to near light-speed. He couldn't stand the silence. It felt like disapproval to him, just as it had when he had been young and got into trouble. He would stand on one side of his father's desk, and his father would sit in the desk chair and stare at him for what seemed like hours. Sheppard would have rather had his father yell at him, ground him – just do something besides sit there with a disappointed look on his face. But no, he never yelled – not until Sheppard was a teenager, at least – just scowled at him and took away one of his toys or privileges.

Sweat drops started to stand out near his hairline. He felt that if he did not break the silence soon, he would go crazy, and so he started talking again.

"And, that sounded really stupid. Really, John? Could you be any more awkward? See, this is why I don't talk about feelings. They always seem to come out sounding wrong and weird, and I start acting like an idiot teenager again, all goofy and..."

Teyla shook her head then. "I know what you meant, John, and it is not stupid." Shifting her position slightly, she turned to gaze straight at him. "I suppose I should also tell you..."

She was cut off by the unmistakable sound of a Jumper flying toward them, and as the Jumper appeared in the clearing and began to descend onto the grass, Sheppard muttered, "Great timing, Lorne." Teyla smiled. She, too, was disappointed that the major had returned at just that moment.

As the Jumper powered down, Sheppard flopped backward with a heavy sigh. "Damn. I guess the camping trip's over."

Teyla smiled. "I feel the same. But we really should get you home."

Home. The word was such a small one, and yet just the sound of it soothed his ears like the gentle waves of the ocean. Atlantis, his home, awaited him like a long-lost lover, and he could barely wait until he was back in her calming embrace. He missed her ever-present hum in the back of his mind, sometimes seeming to actually speak in words to him, lulling him to sleep on rough nights, promising him that she would always be there for him.

Lorne stepped off the Jumper and practically ran over to where Sheppard and Teyla sat, his brows drawn together in concern.

"Colonel," Lorne said, forgoing the customary salute. "Sorry we're late. Ran into a little trouble with the Wraith."

Sheppard chuckled. "What else is new? Good to see you, Major."

He held out his hand, and Evan shook it. "Not as good as it is to see you, sir. We almost thought you were a goner a few days ago."

"Me, too," Sheppard replied with a nod. Then he turned to Teyla. "Why don't we all get the tent packed up, and we can get the hell outta here?"

"That is fine, Colonel," she said, switching back to his formal name in front of Evan. "But Major Lorne and I can handle the tent."

"You sure?"

Teyla nodded. "Of course, you will need to retrieve your bird friend first."

Sheppard snapped his fingers. "I can't believe I forgot!" Standing up, he managed to hobble over to the tent and peeked his head inside. "Molly!"

The bird chirped once, and after a quick rustle of feathers, she was again perched on Sheppard's shoulder. He reached up and rubbed his finger over her sleek head, and she rubbed her beak against his cheek.

"I'll be damned," Lorne exclaimed as he watched them. "I'll never figure out how you got a wild bird to become your pet so quick."

Sheppard shrugged. "I guess she just knew I needed her." He shot a meaningful look over at Teyla, who smiled softly in return.

"Well, seems like you got a friend for life."

Lorne began pulling the tent stakes out of the ground, and he and Teyla managed to pack up the camp in a matter of minutes. When they were certain they had everything, Lorne volunteered to go first in line, as he had a stronger flashlight, and Sheppard readily agreed. He was finished tripping over every bit of nature he encountered.

"Grab a seat, sir, and we'll get you back to Atlantis asap."

"Sounds good, Major," Sheppard replied as he reflexively reached up to hit the rear hatch control. His arm burned in protest, and with a sudden shout he quickly pulled it against his chest, cradling it with his other arm. Now, Teyla couldn't hide her frustration; huffing a sigh, she jostled him aside and pushed the control. As the hatch slowly raised up and locked into place, she took his shoulders and steered him to the co-pilot's chair, then adjusted it until it was leaning as far back as it would go. With a frown of concentration between her brows, she stood up and tested that it was safe. When it held her weight, she nodded and then pushed him down into it. Molly shrieked and flew off his shoulder, landing on the console in front of him instead.

"Teyla, you don't have to..."

"Be quiet," she snapped. "Stop pretending you can do everything, and let us take care of you."

"But...but..."

Ignoring his stuttered protests, she moved back to the rear section and dug around in the compartments, then came back to where he sat, a white pillow in her hands. She reached down and took his head in one of her hands, gently pulling him forward, and slipped the pillow behind his head. When he was settled, she looked to Lorne.

"Let me know if he moves."

The major nodded, his eyes wide. "Yes, ma'am."

"What're you gonna do if I do?" Sheppard asked her, his eyes narrowed in what he hoped came across as curiosity, but was actually nervousness.

"Sedate you," she said with a slight lift of her shoulder. "Jennifer has been teaching me a few simple procedures. I am certain I could 'knock you out' for the entire trip, if need be."

Lorne bit the inside of his cheek to hide a smile. Teyla was a sweet lady, very gentle in most cases, but boy, she could be a tough cookie. He figured that had to do more with dealing with Sheppard and McKay than anything else.

Sheppard stared at her until he was completely certain that she was serious, and then nodded. "Fair enough." Glancing sideways at Lorne, he said to him, "I think I'm gonna take a little cat-nap. Wake me up when we get home."

Lorne nodded. "You got it, sir."

After performing a few routine tasks, he brought up the HUD and plotted their course back to Atlantis. As Sheppard drifted in and out of slumber, Lorne glanced back at Teyla, who smiled conspiratorially at him. Surprised, he grinned back, finally understanding her actions. She had pulled a bluff on Sheppard, and, even more surprising, he had fallen for it.

Lorne chuckled out loud then. Apparently, even after five years with Teyla, Sheppard could still be completely fooled by her.

TBC...