Chapter 29
Monday September 18th, 2006
12:15 p.m.
Heaven's Paradise
"Lunch is ready Miss Sara," Elsie announced as she opened the library door. Sara nodded, not looking away from the window she was staring at unseeingly, and Elsie knew it wasn't just because she couldn't see physically. "I've set it up on the veranda for you," she continued and Sara's headed nodded ever so slightly. Turning she left the room with a sigh.
Sara listened for the door to close before sighing softly. Reaching down she found Sahidi's lead before rising and making her way to the Veranda. In all honesty food was the last thing on her mind. But if she didn't eat lunch, after skipping breakfast and barely touching dinner the night before...well, she didn't need Jessica showing up after the lecture she'd get from Alicia first.
"There's someone here to see you Miss Sara," James spoke up as she sat down.
"Who is it?" she asked looking up at him.
"Mrs. Sutton."
/-/Speak of the Devil./-/ Sara nodded and released the breath she hadn't realized she was holding. "I'll see her. Thank you James."
"You're welcome Miss."
"Sara," she reminded him softly and she knew he was smiling slightly. She'd been on his case since she was a teenager to call her simply Sara.
"You know he'll never actually call you just Sara, don't you my Dear?" Alicia asked as she came up behind him and smiled at the man.
"I know, but it's worth a try after all," Sara smiled slightly.
"Of course," Alicia agreed as she removed the light jacket she was wearing and waved James off when he started to step forward for it.
"Can I get you anything, Mrs. Sutton?" he asked instead.
"A glass of ice tea would be wonderful," Alicia answered and he nodded before leaving as she took a seat. "So, how are you, Sara Dear?" she asked after a moment.
"Fine."
"Sara...my Dear Girl..." Alicia began with a sigh and Sara glanced up at her.
"Can you tell me where everything is on my plate?" she asked and Alicia shook her head.
"Cucumber Sandwiches are on the left, avocado and fruit on your right. Avocado near ten o'clock, fruit below," she explained.
"Thank you," Sara answered before picking up a sandwich. "So, how are you Alicia?"
"Well enough. Worried about you though," Alicia answered as James returned with her tea then took his leave.
/-/Times like this I hate having family. Laura and Jack have visited at least once every two weeks since I came here, Alicia is here constantly, and I know Jess would be here if work allowed it more often. Even Scor is talking about visiting...then again he only wants to visit to beat the crap out of Gil.../-/
"Sara?" Alicia asked bringing Sara from her thoughts.
"I'm fine Alicia, really," she protested, fighting a sigh.
"Sara, you just had major surgery a few weeks ago, you're not fine," Alicia argued.
"Alicia..." Sara began
"Sara, please. You haven't talked to anyone since you came to Heaven's Paradise. It's been over seven weeks," she continued concerned.
"And for the first few I was recovering Alicia," Sara argued lightly.
"Sara...please. Just talk to me. We're all worried about you," Alicia pressed.
Sighing heavily Sara set her fork down and pushed her plate away. "I'd rather not, Alicia."
"Please. If I have to, I'll call Jessica, you know I will," Alicia threatened lightly and she smiled lightly when she saw Sara just roll her eyes.
"Ms. Sutton, Miss Sidle," James spoke and Alicia turned to look at him, surprised to find her son there.
"Roberto, what are you doing here?"
"Forgive me mother, but we tried to call you and your cell phone was off. Father is expecting you."
"Oh goodness, how could I forget that?" Alicia sighed. "Sara, I'm afraid I have to go..."
"That's alright Alicia. Thank you for coming," Sara smiled as she rose and exchanged a hug with Alicia. "Roberto," she greeted with a nod.
"Good day Sara."
"Is there anything you need, Miss Sidle?" James asked after a few moments.
"No, thank you James, but please, lunch was delicious."
"Of course, well, I shall take my leave then," James spoke before leaving and Sara thanked whatever deity was watching that he hadn't called her on the fact that she didn't really seem to put anything behind her statement about lunch.
Taking her seat back, Sara sighed and began to hum as the tune floated around her head. It was a terribly sad song, but she had been living with it in her mind and soul since she had come to Heaven's Paradise. After a few moments she began to sing along with the melody in her head, softly of course so no one would hear her unless they were on the veranda.
"When we were still in love
Above the clouds we flew, yes
But now they have gone out to sea
To weep for me and you
"I remember everything
As if it were happening
When the promise that we made
Was everlasting
"When we were still in love
I sang a happy song
But now all I hear is the bitter wind
That whispers love is gone
"Now all I hear is the bitter wind
That whispers love is gone"
"A beautiful song."
Nearly jumping, Sara looked up towards the doors to the house. "Roberto?" she asked after a moment.
"Forgive me, Mother left her jacket and I offered to come back and get it while she went on home ahead of me," he explained as he moved closer.
"Ah, I see," Sara nodded before looking down at her hands.
"You sing beautifully though, Ms. Sidle. But such a sad song...one would have thought if anyone would have reason to sing such a song here it might have been myself."
Sara snorted before glancing up at him. "Sorry. That was rude."
"Forgotten," Roberto answered. "May I take a seat?" he asked after a moment. Seeing her shrug of non-commitment he took the initiative and sat down in the seat that had held his mother not long before. "Sara...are you all right?" he asked after a moment.
"I'm fine," she answered automatically.
"Jessica used to say the same thing. I think I believe you about as much as I did her."
Sara glanced up at him and shook her head. "I'll be fine in the grand scheme of things, until then...I'm alive. It's enough for me."
"You speak like someone who has lost their world."
"Perhaps I have," she sighed as she looked off towards the horizon.
"Did you loose the world? Or just your heart?" after a few minutes of silence during which she had hoped he'd get the hint he continued. "Sara...as ridiculous as this sounds. No matter what heartache you are feeling now, it's not the end of the world."
"How would you know?" she asked softly.
"Because a year ago my heart was broken. And for a few months, I thought the world was over."
"And now?" she asked. Jessica would be happy to learn he had moved on.
"Now, I've found someone who gives me the happiness I saw in Jessica's eyes when her true love was near her. Happiness I once saw in your eyes."
"Congratulations."
"Congratulations I hear are yours and Jessica's as well," Roberto countered.
"Not for me," Sara whispered before looking away. /-/No, don't think about it Sara...don't think about,/-/
"What do you mean? I thought you and Dr. Grissom were engaged. Mother received an invitation in July..." Roberto trailed off confused.
"That was then," she answered with a sigh. Was everyone getting the invitations her parents had sent out? They were putting their own invitations off until her birthday...which now didn't matter. But not her parents, they had those announcements off as soon as possible. She had never heard Laura so happy as the day they called to tell Laura and Jack of the engagement.
But that was then...
"Sara...what happened?" Roberto asked carefully. "I understand that you might not want to talk about it. But perhaps it would help you move on by talking about it?"
"I'm sorry Roberto, I can't," Sara answered with a sigh. "Please excuse me Roberto; I feel a headache coming on."
"Of course," he replied and she heard him stand as she rose. "Have a good day Sara. And if you ever wish to vent at someone, I'll gladly listen."
Nodding towards him, she headed into the house and her bed.
Wednesday September 20th, 2006
5:52 p.m.
Heaven's Paradise
"Hello Sara," Roberto greeted when he saw the woman ahead of him on the path. She looked up from her book and looked towards him, and he frowned when he got a good look at her. The woman before him somehow bore small resemblance to the woman he was re-introduced to a year ago. Physically she looked the same, yes her hair was longer, below her shoulder blades and a riot of curls, but other than that she appeared the same, still a thin, willowy woman. It was her aura that had changed. She wore her glasses, even though the sun was not out this day, so it wasn't just to avoid sunlight. The year before she seemed to prefer not wearing them, and now that he thought about it, the few times he had seen her since she returned to their area she had always been wearing them. She seemed defeated, as if she had nothing left to live for.
He had heard the rumors that floated between the staff of Heaven's Paradise, their worry over the woman most had known for two decades...Doctor Edwards said she had an emotional and nervous breakdown; a mental breakdown possibly. They wouldn't know for sure unless she was admitted to a hospital. But instead she remained here. He knew from his mother that she had undergone surgery six weeks earlier. He didn't know exactly what the surgery was for, and he hadn't asked.
But if was obvious that the woman needed to talk about whatever it was haunting her, slowly killing her from the inside...
"Roberto," she greeted after a moment. "What brings you to Heaven's Paradise today?"
"I came to see one of the horses my father has bought from Jessica," he answered as he walked towards her. "May I sit?"
"Of course," she replied and he smiled, knowing it was simply good manners that caused her to give that answer. Thank God for those.
"How are you?"
"Fine."
"Sara..." he began with a sigh. "I'm going to be blunt here but you're not fine. Everyone in the area knows that something is wrong. We'd all like to help you..."
"There's nothing wrong," she argued.
"Sara...you don't have to be strong all the time."
"You don't know what you're talking about," she snapped and he brushed off the glare she was sending his way.
"Don't I? Sara...I remember when we were children. Even then, you always seemed to be in control, as if you couldn't not be in control. It must be exhausting having fought to control your life for over twenty years..."
"If you'll excuse me Roberto," she began as she rose and Sahidi rose as well.
"You're running you know," he pressed. No one else was pushing her to talk, afraid of how she'd react. If he could do one thing for Jessica, perhaps he could give her back her friend. And if Sara hated him, so be it. Better him than Jessica or her family.
"Don't tell me how to live my life," she growled as she looked back at him.
"Why not? You're not doing that great of a job living it. You're not even living your life, you're just existing," he countered with a shrug, and nearly smiled as he saw her spine straighten in indignation.
"How dare you, you know nothing about me or my life."
"What is there to know? You had a great life, and yet you never really lived it. You worked; you came home and did nothing. You found love, and it seems you just threw it away. So you lost your sight, no reason to give up on life entirely."
"You think I'm like this because of my sight?" Sara asked with a humorless laugh. "God, that is only one event in the car wreak of my life."
"Really? Well then why don't you enlighten me? Because from where I stand, you've had it pretty well off."
"Look whose talking," she countered
"I've never claimed my life wasn't great Sara. You're the one who goes around doing that."
"Damn you!" Sara yelled suddenly and he smiled to himself. Took a while to get her to be angry, but now that she was, maybe she'd let it all out. "You think you know so much Roberto Aragon, well you're wrong. You want to know why I was always in control of my life, even back then. Well then I'll tell you. I had to be in control of my life, and that was the only way I could be. Because when I left here, I returned to my psychotic uncle who thought we were married and raped me practically on a daily basis! And yes ok, so he was out of my life when my mother kicked him out, but that didn't mean he couldn't be following me for all I knew. My first three years of college I had to look over my shoulder for fear he'd show up and punish me for going against his wishes. But then he never came and I let my guard down."
"So, then you could have started living your life," he pointed out, although thankful he had been reading about the trial against the Birchwood Rapist so that none of this, for the most part, would be a surprise.
"Are you kidding? I couldn't let people know about my past...they'd look down on me. I had to be in control to keep my past from coming out..."
"And yet it did come out."
"Only because I had no choice. What would you do if you found out that a man had killed nearly a hundred women for you? And look what it cost. I lost my sight, but you know, that never really bothered me as much as the other things in my life."
"So, you still let your desire for control go, started living. What happened there? Decide it wasn't structured enough for you?" he countered, still pressing her.
"Go to hell Roberto," Sara snapped.
"Oh no, Sweetheart, I have every intention of going to heaven thank you very much."
"Good for you," she countered as she crossed her arms over her chest.
"So what happened? Did you realize that John was right and the two of you belonged together or something?"
"Shut up! That is just wrong and sick and...just disgusting. I wouldn't go to him if he was the last man on earth."
"So you left Dr. Grissom for no good reason?"
"I didn't have any choice!" she yelled.
"What, did he break up with you?" he asked raising an eyebrow as he regarded the irate woman before him.
"He may as well have," she answered before sighing heavily and sinking to the ground in defeat.
"What does that mean?" he asked softly as he crouched down next to her.
"Ever since Texas, since my sight started going I've been getting headaches. They've gotten progressively worse over the months," Sara began softly as she stared down at her hands. "While we were in Florida he was on my case about seeing a doctor, I said I would when we got back. Then one day at trial Stevens, John's lawyer, said the wrong thing...and John of all people got up and cold-cocked him. Of course he probably would have done it differently if he had known that Stevens was going to flip over the witness stand that he was leaning against and land on me," she shook her head. "I woke up in the emergency room later on, they had done several tests to make sure I didn't have a concussion and discovered what was going on. The blood clots that took my sight were pressing on nerves and causing the headaches, migraines now. The only way to stop them was surgery..." trailing off Sara reached over to run her hand along the Sahidi's back as he put his head on her lap and whined lightly. "I convinced him to wait until we were home, the trial would be over soon, and what was a few more days, maybe weeks compared to the last months. Gil wasn't happy but he agreed. And when we got back I went and saw my doctor. He confirmed what the doctors in Florida had diagnosed, but we were leaving for Dallas for the trial there two days later and so I put it off until we got back, unless the headaches got significantly worse while we were in Dallas. So we went to Texas, had one more trial. Met Nick's family and I got into it with his sister-in-law. Real basket case that one..." Sara trailed off with a half smile.
"What happened when you had the surgery?" he asked softly.
"I didn't. I kept putting it off. Gil wasn't happy but he couldn't force me...as the days past he continued to try and talk me into going but I kept avoiding it. At the same time, John was back in Vegas for the final trial. I didn't want to have to drag everyone through the media and memories again so I went to see him. I talked with him, asked him to plead no contest to the charges. Reasoned with him, and finally begged him. Finally I left, told him goodbye and that regardless of his decision, I'd never let what he did ruin my life again. I'm a terrible liar, but at least he was left with the knowledge that he couldn't control me," she shrugged. "I didn't tell anyone about it, and then the D.A. stopped by the lab, knowing I'd be there, to say Stevens had contacted them, John was going to plead no contest. He said he didn't know what I had said, but whatever it was, it had worked. Then he'd gone back to his other cases, and left me with a room full of people looking at me and wondering what the D.A. was talking about. I had no choice but to tell them I'd gone to see John, alone, and without telling them."
"I bet that was interesting."
"Very. For the most part everyone was just in shock that I'd done it. Can't say I blame them...Jess was upset that I would even consider going to see him alone and not take someone with me. If not Gil, then at least Nick or Warrick. But Gil was the one I cared about. He didn't say a word then, so Cath and I went back to her place for a girl's night we'd planned. We both crashed that night on the couch while watching Phantom, I think it was...I don't really remember now. But the next thing I knew, Warrick was waking me up to take me home and Catherine was back in her own bed. Gil was still at work that day and it was my night at the Foundation so I didn't see him that night. But we both got home the next morning and he was upset to say the least."
"Oh?"
"I came home with a migraine, one of the worst I've had in a long time, and to be honest it was enough to have me trying to nearly cut my head off to stop the pain. He was frustrated, angry about what happened...and I know I'm making excuses for him..." she trailed off with a sigh. "We got into a blowout quite honestly, lasted off and on all day. He'd leave for a while; I passed out from the pain for a few hours while he was gone...it was just not a day that you want to remember...Unfortunately, I can't forget."
"What happened?"
"About four or so he left once more, I had enough I called a cab and got Sahidi. Grabbed a few articles of clothing and threw them into a plastic grocery bag, first thing I could find. I was going to go to the Foundation, I knew I could be there and he wouldn't be allowed to see me if I didn't want to see him. We had a temporary set up for people running from abusive situations..."
"But?"
"But when the cab stopped, I found myself at Jessica's. Nick had heard the car and came out, luckily he did or I would have been looking for the doors to the Foundation and not finding them..."
"What did Jessica say?"
"I don't really remember...I was a wreak. I couldn't stay in Vegas...I remember saying something like that. I'm not even sure who suggested I come up here... but that night she called in to get off, and we flew up here. She stayed until the last possible moment, then went home."
"And what did you do?"
"I don't really remember...I called Doc. Edwards, set up the appointment. I've been told they found me in the shower one day, hours after I had entered. Luckily the water was cold and not hot or something...Spent a few days in the hospital prior to the surgery, I think Gary was afraid I might do something...but I had my surgery, came back here for recovery and my headaches are gone, thank God. My sight's gone for good as well...the clots are gone yet the sight remains gone as well, only proves the original theory that my sight would have gone if we went through with the surgery to begin with..." Sara trailed off with a sigh. "My parents have been up every weekend they can get away; your mother is always coming by. But to be honest...I can't be happy like everyone wants me to be. They don't understand...the only time I've been truly happy since I was a child was with Gil...and now that's gone."
"What about your birthday? I heard there was some sort of party?" he asked with a frown.
"My parents came up, Sara and Nick flew up, and your mother stopped by. It was great...I suppose. I think they might know I was only smiling for them, so they wouldn't feel bad. I just want the hurt to go away...I'm so tired of trying to be happy so they don't worry about me. I'm so tired of everything, I wish I could just go to sleep and wake up and this would be gone. But every time I wake up...I remember that it's not over. I can't go back to Vegas...I can't be in the same town as him and not be with him. And I can't stay here forever...yet where do I go?" Sara trailed off in a whisper.
"I don't know, Sara," Roberto sighed softly. "I don't know," he answered as he gently ran a hand along the back of the crying woman. He'd have to contact Jessica, or have his mother do that. But Jessica needed to know what Sara was thinking, so she and those in Sara's life could change their tactics, and let Sara know it was okay not to be 'happy just for them'.
Saturday September 23rd, 2006
1:41 a.m.
Heaven's Paradise
"Sahidi?" Sara asked as she poked her head out from under the covers before groaning. "Kid, go back to sleep," she continued before pulling the covers back over her head. She loved that dog to death, but damn did he make a lot of noise when he moved in the night. If the dog was able, she'd think he was opening the window or something.
Hearing another thunk she groaned before throwing the covers off as she sat up. "Sahidi...what's got you moving so much?"
Suddenly someone cleared their throat, and Sara shrieked for all she was worth.
"Sara! It's okay, it's just me."
And so she shrieked again.
"Miss Sara?" James called and she could hear someone running up the stairs as she felt around for the light switch to the side lamp by her. "Miss Sara?" James asked as he opened the door and the light came on. "Dr. Grissom?" he continued confused when he opened the door.
"Good evening James," Gil smiled sheepishly.
"Oh God, I'm not dreaming," Sara groaned as she let her head fall into her waiting hands.
"Dr. Grissom, please come with me," James spoke in his normal 'James' voice.
"Actually I really need to talk with Sara..." Gil countered.
"Dr. Grissom, it's the middle of the night. And Miss Sara has requested that you not be allowed in the house, I'm afraid you're going to have to come with me," James frowned; she could just hear the frown in his voice.
"I understand that James, I really do..." Gil began and she had enough.
"James... he can stay," Sara began as she looked up. "If he went through all the trouble of getting in here in the middle of the night, God only know how he pulled that off, then he may as well have his piece."
"Are you sure?"
/-/Sure I'm sure. I'm sure that I'm about ready to bust out into tears. I'm sure I'm ready to scream. I'm sure that this man has the power to destroy me with a single word, not even that...I'm sure that this can destroy the small amount of progress I've made in the few days since I finally admitted what happened...I'm sure I couldn't bear to have him tell me that he wants to know when I'm getting my stuff or something equally as final because it would prove that the one person who changed my life forever in a way no one else could, was just a brief spot of happiness before God decided to laugh and take it away in order to watch me flounder in the horror that is my past and life...no, that's more Satan's thing…but still...same difference. God help me get through this...please.../-/ "I'm sure," she answered softly.
"As you wish Miss Sara, if you need me..."
"I'll let you know," she assured the man. Hearing the door shut a moment later she took a deep breath and slipped the mask she was suddenly thankful she spent years perfecting around him up, before looking up at him. "Gil."
"You're a hard woman to find you know that?" he asked softly and she could hear that he was smiling that half smile of his that he used when he wasn't sure about something. She'd seen it on him enough before she left Vegas more than two years earlier.
/-/Dear God, it's been two years.../-/ "I can imagine," she answered as she picked up the edge of the blanket and pulled it over her lap.
"I got your letter a few weeks ago...and the ring," he added in a whisper.
"I see," she answered as she looked off towards the window. "How did you get in here?" she asked after a moment.
"Well, after I got the ring I thought you were in Florida...ingenious sending the package to your brother to have him send it to me..." he trailed off before sighing. "I didn't know you weren't there until I'd been to Miami and seen every friend you have there, and then camped out on Scor's doorstep for a week. Which reminds me, Frank Jr doesn't like the cold does he?"
"No he doesn't," Sara smiled slightly. "I can still remember the first time I woke up to find a two-foot alligator in my bed."
"I can imagine," he remarked dryly. "I found a fourteen-foot one taking over my sleeping bag."
"That must have sucked."
"Quite. Your brother finally took pity on me...or got sick of seeing me…I'm not sure which. All I know is he finally told me you weren't in Florida and sent me on my way, with one hell of a sore jaw," he trailed off with that tone of his voice he used whenever he was contemplating something.
"Here I thought he was joking about beating the crap out of you."
"Not exactly. Well he didn't beat the crap out of me, although I did nearly need to have my jaw wired..."
"He broke your jaw?" Sara asked in shock as she looked over at him. "No way. My brother, Christopher Jackson Sidle, nearly broke your jaw?"
"Yes he did," Gil agreed with a short burst of laughter. "I can only imagine what he might have done to John after being on the receiving end of his fists."
"You and me both...now," Sara agreed still floored that her brother actually hit someone. Chris was like her; he abhorred violence. For different reasons of course...
"After I got back to Vegas I went to Jess. She was as silent on the matter as Scor...but I finally broke Nick, so to speak," he explained.
"Really now?" she asked with a smirk. "How'd you do that?"
"He took pity on me, decided there was something I needed to see."
"What's that?" she asked with a frown.
"A video, from your birthday last week."
"What?" she asked confused before he started to explain and she remembered what he was talking about. She had wanted to escape from the happiness and sought out the music room...
Sighing softly Sara sunk onto the piano bench. She didn't want to ruin their happiness but she couldn't help it...she didn't see the reason for the joy of a birthday. Reaching up she trailed her fingers along the keys as various melodies traveled through her mind. Finding one key she pressed it once before smiling slightly. Happy songs weren't here friends anymore...no...these were. Reaching up with her other hand she began to play the melody on her mind.
"If I'd have known the way that this would end
If I'd have read the last page first
If I'd have had the strength to walk away
If I'd have known how this would hurt."
"I would've loved you anyway
I'd do it all the same
Not a second I would change
Not a touch that I would trade
Had I known my heart would break
I'd have loved you anyway."
She didn't hear the doors open, nor did she even sense the other presences in the room, lost in the song and the one time she let herself feel.
"It's bittersweet to look back now
At mem'ries withered on the vine
But just to hold you close to me
For a moment in time."
"I would've loved you anyway
I'd do it all the same
Not a second I would change
Not a touch that I would trade
Had I known my heart would break
I'd have loved you anyway."
"And even if I'd seen it coming
You'd still've seen me running
Straight into your arms."
"I would've loved you anyway
I'd do it all the same
Not a second I would change
Not a touch that I would trade
Had I known my heart would break
I would've loved you anyway."
"I would've loved you anyway."
Only when she stopped playing did she hear someone sniffle and realize someone else was in the room. It didn't take long to place the unique scents of her father and mother, sea breeze and flowers, and that unique scent of her father's brownies. Jessica's presence was even easier to recognize, and Nick's after her. Looking towards them she smiled. Praying they wouldn't see behind the mask.
"Okay, so I resorted to tracking your credit card activity, I admit it, I actually broke the rules. Fortunately the new A.D. was willing to overlook it on the condition that I got my head out of my ass and finally talked to you. His words," he added bring her attention back to the here and now.
"I can just hear Jim saying that,." Sara mused.
"Well, to be honest I didn't need the prodding..." he continued after a moment. "Sara...I..."
"Gil...please don't," she whispered holding up a hand before looking away.
"Don't what? Tell you what a fool I've been? How much of an idiot I was? How much I love you and how lost I've been without you?" he rushed as he paced the room. She could count his steps; four to one side, turn and seven the other way, then turn and seven to the side again.
"Don't say something that you don't mean," she whispered after a few passes.
"What makes you think I don't mean them?" he asked, the pacing stopped.
She wisely chose to keep silent. The last time he'd left her an opening like that, albeit it was a different opening entirely, she'd compared him to his father. Not her wisest moment, and she surely didn't intend to repeat that...Then again, what could be worse than saying he's one to talk about procrastination about a medical condition or comparing him to his deadbeat father who walked out on his mother...
"Sara..." he began after a few moments. "I mean every word. I know it's hard to believe...consider what we said the last time we were together. And I was a fool for saying those things. I shouldn't have been so angry, and I'll probably never apologize enough during the rest of our lifetimes to make it right. But don't you realize how much you mean to me?" he continued, each word more earnest than the last. And oh she wanted to believe him. How she did.
"I can't do this tonight Gil...I just...can't," she finally managed to get out.
"Alright. But I'm not going to go away Sara..."
"Some reason I already knew that," she answered before breathing a sigh of relief when her door shut and his presence was gone. "God help me...please," she whispered to the room.
Saturday September 23rd, 2006
9:12 p.m.
Heaven's Paradise
Slipping onto the piano bench, Sara resisted the urge to let her head fall on the keys then proceed to try and play Beethoven with just her forehead. Who knew the man could be so persistent.
/-/You did,/-/ the voice in her head reminded her.
"Shut up," she growled before closing her eyes. /-/Let's see, according to the last time the clock chimed, it is after nine now, and he showed up this morning, as I later learned from James and Elsie, just after one. And I finally came out of my room around nine...so he's been here a total of twenty hours and I've been listening to him plead his case, beg, and anything else he's tried to get me to let him back in for the last twelve...God save me./-/
/-/But you still love him./-/
/-/Shut up!/-/
/-/No! Listen to me for once in your ever-loving life. You still love him! He loves you! He wants you back! And for the love of God, he is willing to give up being a CSI for you./-/
/-/Yeah and that would destroy more of him than loosing me could so I'm not even letting him consider that./-/
/-/And you won't go back to him, why?/-/
/-/UGGH! You're a voice inside my head shouldn't you know these things. Seeing as you are a part of me./-/
/-/So, just because I know them doesn't mean it wouldn't do you good to hear them. Admit it; you were ready to take him back after he broke into your best friend's house at one in the morning so he could talk to you./-/
"Oh God. I'm losing my mind. My mind is talking back to me," Sara groaned.
"Well, as long as it isn't threatening to kill you," Gil's voice spoke behind her and she raised her head to look at him.
"Funny," she answered before going back to the piano and trailing her fingers along the keys.
"Can you do something for me?" he asked after a few moments.
She glanced up at him before looking back down at the keys. /-/That depends on what it is of course./-/
"If I tell you the notes, can you play something for me?" he continued after a moment.
"Probably, but then again I may already know it," she shrugged. "It's Braille Sheet Music?"
"Yes."
"Can I see?" Sara asked holding a hand up. Feeling the paper rest on her hands a few moments later she ran her fingers over the page, raising an eyebrow when she felt the Braille at the top, showing the title. "Oh, well in this case, there's no need. My father, for all his insanity is a big Lee Greenwood fan," she continued after a moment and handed him back the page, not quite sure why he wanted her to play that song. It had been years since she heard the lyrics though…but she and Scor had learned the music quickly enough. They used to have concerts for Jack's birthday of all his favorite artists.
"Would you play it then?" he asked softly and she shrugged in response before turning her attention to the keys and finding the right ones. But she wasn't expecting him to start…not really singing, since that wasn't his thing, but speaking what she assumed were the lyrics a few moments later with the song.
"You believe that I've changed your life forever
And you're never going to find another somebody like me
And you wish you had more than just a lifetime to give back all I've given you
And that's what you believe."
"Bu the sunlight in the morning
And nights of honest loving that time can't take away
An more than life now more than ever
I know that it's the sweetest debt I'll ever have to pay."
"I'm amazed when you say it's me you live for
You know that when I'm holding you, you're right where you belong
And my love, I can't help but smile and wonder
When you tell me all I've done for you cause I've known all along."
"Caus the sunlight in the morning
And nights of honest loving that time can't take away
An more than life now more than ever
I know that it's the sweetest debt I'll ever have to pay."
"Oh, I O U the sunlight in the morning
And nights of honest loving that time can't take away
An more than life now more than ever
I know that it's the sweetest debt I'll ever have to pay."
"What was that?" she asked after a few moments of silence as she tried to keep from crying.
"My debt to you, Beloved, is one I cannot pay in any coin of any realm on any reckoning day," was his answer and she turned to look at him.
"Damn do you just store the quotes up that you know can get to me to save for when needed most?"
"Not exactly, they seem to come when I need them most though," he answered softly. "Sara…Acushla…please."
"What if we have another fight like that again?" she asked after a moment.
"Then we'll yell and rant and rave and get it out of our system. And after, our relationship will be all the stronger because of it."
"Gil…"
"Please Sara…we've both made mistakes, that's a part of life. But just give me, give us the chance to make things right. And I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you as well."
"You don't have to make it up, you big goof," she smiled shaking her head. "Alright, alright. You've worn down every last defense. So who is it that said that quote?"
"Jessie B. Rittenhouse," he answered with a grin.
"I see. So how did you get in here anyway? Out of curiosity?"
"Remember Something to Talk About with Dennis Quaid and Julia Roberts?"
"Yeah, I've had the recipe for that Salmon with Mint Mustard Sauce since the movie came out..." Sara trailed off glancing at him. "Are your telling me you climbed the trellis and managed to sneak in through a bedroom window?"
"Well I did use a ladder and it was the upstairs library," he answered before shaking his head as she laughed.
Monday September 25th, 2006
8:05 p.m.
Stokes-Harrison Residence
"Hey Jess, we have mail from Sara and Gil," Nick called
"Sara and Gil?" Jessica repeated shocked. "What do you mean from Sara and Gil?"
"Mail from Heaven's Paradise, sent same day delivery this morning. Addressed to Nick Stokes and Jessica Harrison, from G. Grissom and S. Sidle, care of Heaven's Paradise Estates," Nick read.
"Open it!" Jessica answered with a laugh and shaking his head he did so.
"Didn't we already get a wedding invitation?" Nick asked after a moment.
"Yes, the one from Laura and Jack. Why?" Jessica asked as she brushed her hair.
"Well, this looks like one to me," he explained. "On the front there is a black and white picture of an old-fashioned roller coaster, the wooden kind, with a couple in the front car. And at the bottom of the page it says 'taking the roller coaster ride…'"
"Roller coaster? I think Gil finally got his ideal wedding invitation," Jessica laughed.
"You and me both," Nick agreed with a smile before flipping it open to the center section. "Center section has 'of our lives'," he continued before looking at the third part. "There's a verse here…
"I cannot promise you a life of sunshine;
I cannot promise riches, wealth, or gold;
I cannot promise you an easy pathway
That leads away from change or growing old.
"But I can promise all my heart's devotion;
A smile to chase away your tears of sorrow;
A love that's ever true and ever growing;
A hand to hold in yours through each tomorrow."
By the time Nick had finished reading the verse Jessica had joined him and was reading further down the page. "Oh my God, they got back together," she cried when she read further down. "You are cordially invited to the rehearsal dinner…okay, so it's a breakfast to celebrate the wedding…of Gilbert B. Grissom and Sara. M. Sidle. Saturday the thirtieth of December at 8 a.m. at the townhouse…" she continued skipping a few words here and there. "So they're going to have it the day before the second ceremony…"
"Hmm, maybe him seeing that video did some good after all," Nick mused to himself
"Seeing what video?" Jessica asked looking up at him.
"Nothing," he answered quickly and she smirked at him.
"Mm hmm, what did you do?" she asked before laughing at the deer caught in headlights look he got.
Thursday December 14th, 2006
8:15 a.m.
Local Diner
"Okay, a toasty" Jim began as he leaned forward in his chair and lifted his coffee cup.
"Seeing as none of us are going to be attending the initial wedding, other than Jessica and Nick, and the happy couple is leaving tomorrow, I'm giving one now," he continued as the others gathered around the table; Gil, Sara, Jessica, Nick, Catherine, Warrick, Greg, and Mia; raised their glasses or cups as well.
"To friendship, family, and revenge on missing out on the first wedding," he spoke before taking a drink. "Oh and to new additions…" he began before Catherine spit her water across the table, "even if they aren't so new…" he trailed off as everyone looked at Catherine while Warrick rubbed her back and she tried to stop coughing. "You okay there, Catherine? I'll remember next time not to call Sara a 'new addition' if I knew it would have that effect…."
"Fine…just...fine," Catherine managed to get out before taking a small drink of her water. "Sorry."
"Okay, so why did you just decide to give Greggo a bath? Not that he didn't necessarily need one and all…" Jim asked as he leaned back in his chair.
"Hey!" Greg protested.
"Let it go Sweetheart, at least it wasn't coffee," Mia spoke as she patted his hand. They still couldn't believe they got her to a diner, but to be honest she wasn't eating so…the others had merely shaken their heads when Greg appeared with a cup of coffee from somewhere, and an apple turnover.
"You know, that's a good point. Since when do you not drink coffee?" Greg asked looking over at Catherine.
"When she's pregnant," Sara shrugged as she picked up her own glass of orange juice and Catherine suddenly started choking once more. Sara lowered her glass to look over at the other woman. "Okay, I was pointing out a simple fact from the past, but now I'm not so sure…."
"Oh my God. You're pregnant again!" Greg summarized.
"Well, there goes waiting till after the wedding to tell them," Warrick laughed and Catherine just shook her head.
"Honey…it's called birth control," Sara teased lightly.
"Actually, it's called I'm getting my tubes tied after this one," Catherine laughed.
"Well, it seems we're in need of a new toast," Jim began shaking his head. "To those two getting married, it's about time, and our revenge on not being there for the first ceremony. And to new additions, and hopefully no more little Browns in the future after this one…I don't think the world can survive."
"Here here!" Greg and Nick agreed with a laugh before being smacked by Mia and Jessica over their heads.
Yes, I'll marry you, my dear,
And here's the reason why;
So I can push you out of bed
When the baby starts to cry,
And if we hear a knocking
And it's creepy and it's late,
I hand you the torch you see,
And you investigate.
Yes, I'll marry you, my dear,
You may not apprehend it,
But when the tumble-drier goes
It's you that has to mend it,
You have to face the neighbor
Should our Labrador attack him,
And if a drunkard fondles me
It's you that has to whack him.
Yes, I'll marry you,
You're virile and you're lean,
My house is like a pigsty
You can help to keep it clean.
That sexy little dinner
Which you served by candlelight,
As I do chipolatas,
You can cook it every night!
It's you who has to work the drill
and put up curtain track,
And when I've got PMT it's you who gets the flak,
I do see great advantages,
But none of them for you,
And so before you see the light,
I do, I do, I do!
- Pam Ayres
Jackson Alexander and Laura Marie Sidle
Invite you to join them in celebration
Of the joining of their daughter
Sunshine Princess of Fire
And
Gilbert Blythe Grissom
Sunrise on the 24th of December
Two Thousand and Six
Heaven's Paradise Estates
Saturday December 23rd, 2006
7:30 p.m.
Heaven's Paradise
"Can I get out of this tub yet?" Sara asked with a smile as Laura walked through the bathroom.
"Not until your nails dry," Laura replied with a wink and Sara looked over at Jessica for help.
"Sorry sis, but I'm not even going to get in the middle of this one," Jessica smiled.
"Laura," Sara whined. "You've had me in this tub for three hours. I think I'm done, you can stick a fork in me and call me a member of the California Dancing Raisins!"
"But your skin will be extra soft and you'll be completely relaxed tomorrow and that's the whole point of this evening," Laura answered and Sara just rolled her eyes.
"You know, most people might be self conscious about being in a tub the size of a small swimming pool with their mother and best friend walking around the room, and who knows else, seeing them in their birthday suit. Then there's me…I don't even get the option of being self-conscious. She'd give me so many reasons why I shouldn't be, that the whole point would be lost," Sara sighed.
"Such is life, my Firelight," Laura laughed.
"So it would seem," Sara sighed. "Alright, so are we ready for tomorrow?"
"Completely," Jessica assured her.
"Did we get something old, something new, and all that?" Sara asked sitting up suddenly.
"Yes Girl Child, relax. I've only been waiting for this day since I married Jack. Trust me, everything is planned," Laura assured her.
"She's right," Jessica agreed. "Something new is your dress, which reminds me, Laura you did an exquisite job on it."
"Thank you," Laura smiled. "Something old is the bracelet Alicia is loaning you."
"Something borrowed is Eleanor's earrings."
"And I made Scor go get the new dime from the bank yesterday," Laura finished.
"Okay," Sara nodded sinking back into the water.
Sunday December 24th, 2006
6:55 a.m.
Heaven's Paradise
Alicia and Alejandro; along with Sara's cousin Nikolas, of Jesters fame, and his wife Brianna; were the first to walk down the 'aisle' created from rose petals and sand that Laura and Jack had brought from Tamales Bay.
At the end of the aisle was an intricate arch. The arch was made of Birch, Willow, Oak, Holly, and Reed Negtal branches, bound together by Vines with Honey Suckle woven in and Orange Blossoms. Small, what almost looked like Bird nests, rested on the sides of the arch, only a few, but in them sat white candles that were giving off the fragrance of vanilla to drift on the air. Small lanterns dotted the area around the section of the garden they were using, giving light to the area until the sun rose completely.
Then Gil appeared, his mother on his arm as they moved down the aisle, stopping he kissed her cheek before she took a seat next to Alicia and he continued to the end of the aisle before the arch. He was wearing a black suit, the jacket ending at his thigh, and a white shirt with an indigo vest and matching tie. Next was Nick as he escorted Laura down the aisle to the arch and she smiled at him before he moved to join the five already sitting as she smiled at Gil before moving to step inside the arch and next to the table that was sitting there. Gil smiled at her before turning his attention back to the end of the aisle as Jessica and Chris appeared. Chris in a suit similar to Gil's, and Jessica dressed in an A-line, empire waist indigo dress with spaghetti straps and a draped front. She also had a long wrap for her arms that was basically a silk scarf from the looks of it.
Chris dropped Jessica off on her side of the arch before walking over to stand next to Gil and smiled at him. Seeing Jessica's little smile, almost a knowing smile, Gil raised an eyebrow before turning his attention back to the end of the aisle as music began to play. And yet no one was there….
Something in your eyes makes me want to lose myself
Makes me want to lose myself in your arms
There's something in your voice makes my heart beat fast
Hope this feeling lasts the rest of my life
Suddenly, Sahidi appeared at the end of the aisle, a top hat on his head and a pillow attached to his back, and laughter echoed in the garden; both from those sitting down and standing, and from the members of Heaven's Paradise's staff that were hiding among the flowers. Why they were hiding was beyond anyone in the wedding but that was their choice. Sahidi made his way down the aisle as the song continued.
If you knew how lonely my life has been
And how long I've felt so low
If you knew how I wanted someone to come along
And change my life the way you've done
"Got to love that dog," Chris murmured as he called Sahidi over to sit next to the two men.
Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
Next appeared Nik and Brianna's daughter Nikky, the little four-year-old was dressed in the classic Flower Girl dress, white top with a full white skirt and gloves. As she walked, she spread more rose petals over the ground, having an obvious ball with it.
Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong
As the chorus finished, Gil had his first look at Sara in twenty-four hours, and Chris was wondering if he'd have to help the man keep standing as Jack and Sara turned the corner formed by the rose bushes and came to the end of the aisle.
A window breaks down a long dark street
And a siren wails in the night
But I'm alright cause I have you here with me
And I can almost see through the dark there's light
Sara was simply gorgeous in Gil's mind. Not that she wasn't normally but this…this was different. Her A-line dress was ivory in color, and the top was a halter v-neck. The skirt was a chapel train length, meaning it was four feet from her waist to the end of the train, and the fabric of the dress was decorated with floral beaded embroidery, all hand done by Laura, she had been working on the dress in secret since Sara turned sixteen.
If you knew how much this moment means to me
And how long I've waited for your touch
If you know how happy you are making me
I've never thought I'd love anyone so much
Her hair was down; the riot of curls he always loved, though still tamed, what he didn't know was that there were small jewel butterflies interspersed in the curls. Her veil was ivory as well, fingertip length with flowers embroidered on it. She was smiling, that smile of hers, and her hand rested gently on Jack's arm. In her other hand she held a bouquet of pink and white roses, a change from all the blue that was in the wedding.
Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from
After a moment as everyone rose from their seats, Jack and Sara started to walk up the aisle, Sara still smiling at Gil almost as if she could see him, and even without her sight she knew exactly where he was.
Feels like home to me
Feels like home to me
Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong
Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong
As the song ended Jack and Sara had reached the end of the aisle and everyone took their seats. Jack turned to Gil and smiled before turning and kissing Sara on the cheek. Turning back he laid her hand in Gil's and with a slight glare, stepped back as Laura stepped forward.
"We, who have gathered in this circle, are now privileged to witness the acknowledgment of a love which Sunshine and Gilbert have for each other, knowing that by our presence here with them, we are saying that they, together, are loved by many others. We have come to surround them as they stand before us in this center, where now Sunshine and Gilbert in essence say, "Welcome to our marriage! Welcome to the Celebration!" she began with a smile.
"When you love someone, you do not love them all the time, in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. That is impossible. It is even a disservice to pretend it is possible. Yet, that is what most of us demand. We have such little faith in the ebb and flow of life and of love and of relationships. We leap forward at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb, for we are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanence, on duration, on continuity. But the only continuity possible in life, as in love, is in growth, in fluidity and in freedom, as dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in creating the same pattern.
"I speak now to Sunshine and Gilbert of love, in which, the trust and freedom of the other person becomes as significant as the trust and freedom of one's self. I speak to them of generosity, which gathers the beauty of earth for riches and the kindness, which turns away the wrath of foolish men and women. I speak of all our hopes for their continued growth through patience, one for the other. May Sunshine and Gilbert keep the vows made on this day, in freedom, teaching each other who they are, what they yet shall be, enabling them to know that, in the fullness of being, they are more than themselves and more than each other, that they are all of us and that together we share joyously the fruits of life on this Earth, our home," she continued before smiling and looking between them.
"Five woods make up this arch," Laura began after a moment. "Each with a meaning of their own. Birch, beginnings and birth; Willow, Romantic love, healing protection, among others," Laura paused and he had to wonder why Sara suddenly rolled her eyes. "Oak," Laura began after a moment. "Fidelity; Holly, all bound by Vine, the tree of joy, exhilaration…symbolizing inspiration, prosperity and binding. And finally Reed Negtal, the essence of home, finding one's right home, or creating a home that is truly supportive and nurturing of you," she finished and smiled when she heard the coughs to cover anything else, on her husband, son, and nephew's parts. All three knew exactly what she left out of her explanation, a glance at her eldest girl child's face showed she knew as well but was doing better at keeping her reaction to herself, except for the small smirk on her lips.
"The moon has set on the life you lived before, just as the passing of seasons, so pass the seasons of our lives. Before this day, you lived in darkness, lit only by the light reflected of what could be. Like the moon lights the night from light reflected from the sun. After this day, you're lives will be in the light, no longer needed to be reflected. Soon the sun will rise on the rest of your lives," Laura continued before turning to Sara. "Promises of the heart are sacred vows, none can come between what is joined together," she prompted and Sara smiled slightly before turning to look at Gil.
"I, Sunshine Princess of Fire," Sara began with a small laugh, "take you, Gilbert Blythe Grissom, to be my husband, confident in my heart that you will be a faithful friend, and a true and loving companion. On this wondrous day, in the presence of God, our relatives, and our friends as witnesses, I give to you my sacred vow that as your wife, I will always be with you and support you in times of sickness and in times of health, in times of joy and in times of sorrow. I promise to love you completely, to console and comfort you during difficult times, to encourage you to achieve your full potential, to laugh with you and to grieve with you, to share with you life's simplest but most enduring pleasures, to be truthful and honest with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live."
Gil smiled softly before beginning his own vow. "I, Gilbert Blythe Grissom, take you, Sunshine Princess of Fire, to be my wife, confident in my heart that you will be a faithful friend, and a true and loving companion. On this wondrous day, in the presence of God, our relatives, and our friends as witnesses, I give to you my sacred vow that as your husband, I will always be with you and support you in times of sickness and in times of health, in times of joy and in times of sorrow. I promise to love you completely, to console and comfort you during difficult times, to respect you and to protect you from harm, to honor you and to provide for your well-being, to be truthful and honest with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live."
Laura smiled once more. "Vows of the heart are a sign to each other, but to be a sign to the world, we exchange rings. A ring has no end, no beginning, there is no break in a ring, such is a love and partnership between two people," she spoke as Chris leaned down and removed one ring from the pillow on Sahidi's back before Jessica called the dog over softly and removed the other.
Gil smiled before turning and taking the ring from Chris. Turning back to Sara he raised her hand and placed a gentle kiss on her fingertips. "May this ring forever be to you the symbol of my growing love," he spoke softly as he slipped the ring on her hand to rest next to her engagement ring.
Sara smiled back before turning slightly to take his ring and hand Jessica her bouquet. Turning back she took his hand as he gently brushed her fingers so she would know where it was. "May this ring forever be to you the symbol of my growing love."
"May these two find happiness in their union. May they live faithfully together, executing the vows they have made between them; and may they ever remain compassionate and encouraging, that their years may be rich with the joys of life, and their days be long upon the Earth," Laura spoke after a moment. "And by the powers granted to me by the spirit of the earth, and by the state of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife," she continued and Sara smiled at her before turning her attention to Gil as he leaned down to kiss her gently.
Laughing they broke apart as the cheer went up from outside the 'garden'. Taking her hand he waited for Jessica to give her back her bouquet before starting down the aisle. "What was the eye roll for?" he asked with a smile and she laughed softly.
"Willow also symbolizes fertility magic for women, Oak is magic for men. Holly is sex magic, Honey suckle is to pursue our desire, allow oneself to experience pleasure," Sara explained in a low whisper.
"I think my mother has been talking to yours," he laughed in agreement with her.
"Oh it gets better, besides Orange blossoms mean love and marriage, but Laura also knows that my favorite scent is Orange blossoms and vanilla. And…"
"Vanilla is an aphrodisiac," he supplied with a smile.
"Exactly. I think they're plotting against us."
"Well, let them plot away. We'll work on our own schedule," Gil smiled.
"Sounds like a plan to me," Sara agreed with a smile as Jessica and Chris joined them to lead them to where the photographer was waiting for pictures. After the usual number of photos, the others left to head to the ballroom, which was set up for a breakfast / party as Sara and Gil finished taking a few more pictures of just the two of them. When they did make it to the ballroom, everyone was waiting for them and Gil and Sara both were suddenly thankful that they had declined to have a reception line at this ceremony.
After breakfast, a one of a kind wedding reception as far as Sara could figure, Chris popped up with a microphone and explained that he was the major domo… 'or was it the major dodo?' He wasn't exactly sure, but either way he was the master of ceremonies so here he was. And with a smile he announced the first dance for the couple, a break from 'their song' as Jim Brickman and Michael W. Smiths "The Love of My Life" began to play over the speakers strategically hidden in the ballroom.
I am amazed
When I look at you
I see you smiling back at me
It's like all my dreams come true
I am afraid
If I lost you girl
I'd fall through the cracks
And lose my track in this crazy lonely world
Sometimes it's so hard to believe
When the nights can be so long
And faith give me the strength
And kept me going on
As Gil and Sara danced in the middle of the dance floor, the remnants of the meal were taken away and the staff was officially off-duty after that. Everyone smiled and watched the couple as they finished their dance before clapping.
You are the love of my life
And I'm so glad you found me
You are the love of my life
Baby put your arms around me
I guess this is how it feelsWhen you finally find something real
My angel in the night
You are the love
The love of my life
The next song began to play, "Sometimes When We Touch", the duet version, and other couples moved to join the newlyweds; and the party was officially started. A dozen songs later, including dances with parents and such, Gil and Sara were dancing to "Come What May" by Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGregor from Moulin Rouge as Nick and Jessica watched.
And there's no mountain too high no river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather and stars may collide
But I love you until the end of time
Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day
Oh come what may, come what may
I will love you
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day
As the song finished, Chris stood and smiled as he turned to look at the second couple. "Now Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm not quite sure if this is an unusual dance or not, but the bride and groom would like to share a dance with the best man and maid-of-honor. And seeing as I've already danced with my darling sister, she is wondering if her surrogate big brother would do the honor of sharing the dance with her?"
Nick smiled and walked over to Sara, taking her in his arms as they started to dance.
It was no accident me finding you
Someone had a hand in it
Long before we ever knew
Now I just can't believe you're in my life
Heaven's smilin' down on me
As I look at you tonight
"You realize that you're family now Gil, and that means that it's my right as your new sister to inform you that if you hurt Sara in anyway, I will kill you," Jessica informed him with a straight face as they began to dance.
"I was wondering when I'd get the welcome to the family, you hurt her, we kill you speech from you," Gil laughed softly. "Laura beat you three dances ago, Jack got me before the ceremony, and Chris reminded me a few days ago just how good a right hook he has," he continued with a smile.
"Yes, but I'm the only one that can kill you and get away with it," replied Jessica with a laugh.
"This I know. Which if I didn't already learn my lesson about hurting her once, I would know better than to do it simply from your promise," he countered with a slight smile. "But trust me Jess, I learned my lesson the first dozen times and have no intention of hurting her in any way again, at least any way I can control."
"Good. Than you have absolutely nothing to worry about," Jessica said with a smile.
"Good to hear." he smiled back.
I tip my hat to the keeper of the stars
He sure knew what he was doin'
When he joined these two hearts
I hold everything
When I hold you in my arms
I've got all I'll ever need
Thanks to the keeper of the stars
"You look beautiful Sara," Nick said. "You're simply glowing."
"Thank you Nicky," Sara smiled up at him. "So, out of curiosity...think we'll be switching places anytime in the near future? That is, you as the member of the bridal couple and me as the maid-of-honor?" she asked with a teasing smile.
"Maybe," replied Nick with a knowing smile.
Sara rolled her eyes. "I swear, after all the insanity that it our lives, you two just want to torture me by keeping me in suspense about your wedding. And in turn torture poor Gil who had to put up with me making Bacherlorette plans and that dang matron-of-honor speech I've been working on since we were teenagers. He swears I should have that damn thing done by now...Oh well, more torturing of my husband...God I love that word...to come," she finished with a full grin.
Nick simply laughed and shook his head at Sara's reaction. If she only knew everything he and Jessica were keeping from her.
Soft moonlight on your face oh how you shine
It takes my breath away
Just to look into your eyes
I know I don't deserve a treasure like you
There really are no words
To show my gratitude
"Do me a favor," Sara began after a few moments.
"What's that?"
"Spin me?"
"Are you sure?"
"Come on cowboy, I know you know how to do a two-step," she challenged lightly and he grinned.
"Alright then madam, your wish is my command," Nick grinned before spinning her. Although he certainly wasn't expecting for her to let go of his hand and be pulled away by Grissom as Jessica finished her own spin and paused next to him.
I tip my hat to the keeper of the stars
He sure knew what he was doin'
When he joined these two hearts
I hold everything
When I hold you in my arms
I've got all I'll ever need
Thanks to the keeper of the stars
"I think we were ditched."
"I think we were set up," Nick countered with a smile as he pulled his fiancé close.
"I'm thinking you might be right," Jessica laughed as she settled into his arms. "Like the song though."
"So do I."
It was no accident me finding you
Someone had a hand in it
Long before we ever knew
"So, did my evil plan work?" Sara asked with a smile.
"Oh, I think it did. They seem blissfully unaware of the rest of the world," Gil smiled as he looked down at her head resting against his shoulder.
"Good. Because it's the perfect song for the two of them…and it works on so many levels."
"Oh?" he asked curious.
"Mm hmm. The 'keeper of the stars' might have had a hand in the two of them getting together. But I like to think the rest of us helped the process along as well. And it sure as hell wasn't an accident that he found her."
"No, that it was not Acushla, that it was not," he agreed with a smile.
"Well Mrs. Grissom, how are you feeling?" Gil asked with a smile as he led her onto the dance floor once more after the wedding 'turnovers' were cut and handed out to guests, the dance floor once more entirely theirs.
"Would heavenly possibly make sense?" Sara countered with a smile as she slipped into his arms and they started to sway.
Winter snow is falling down
Children laughing all around
Lights are turning on
like a fairy tale come true.
Sitting by the fire we made
You're the answer when I prayed
I would find someone
and baby I found you.
"To me it would," he answered and she smiled brightly before beginning to hum along with the song.
"Did I ever tell you I adore this song? Whenever I heard it I used to sit and wonder if we'd dance to it at our wedding if we ever married."
"Really now?"
All I want is to hold you forever
All I need is you more every day
You saved my heart
from being broken apart
You gave your love away
and I'm thankful every day
for the gift.
Watching as you softly sleep
What I'd give if I could keep
Just this moment
if only time stood still.
"Really," she answered after a few moments.
"Is it liked you always imagined?" Gil asked after a moment with a smile.
"Nope."
But the colors fade away
And the years will make us grey
But baby in my eyes
You'll still be beautiful.
"No?"
"It's better," she grinned and he laughed as he shook his head before moving her out into a spin.
All I want is to hold you forever
All I need is you more every day
You saved my heart
from being broken apart
You gave your love away
And I'm thankful every day
for the gift.
As she came back into his arms, the song went to an instrumental bridge, and they changed pace slightly, content to simply be in each others arms, then Sara began to sing softly.
All I want is to hold you forever
All I need is you more every day
You saved my heart
from being broken apart
You gave your love away
I can't find the words to say
That I'm thankful every day
for the gift.