A/N Sorry this took so long, I got stuck. I had lots of ideas but the chapter I was working on wasn't going anywhere. So I scrapped it and moved on to the next idea. And things started to finally move along. The only downfall by doing that was that I don't think we'll have anymore Austria flashbacks after this one.
Speaking of Austria's flashbacks of the torture. His are in italics, But Roderich has flashbacks, in his flashback… yeah. So those are not in italics. It sounds confusing, but you'll get it when you get there.
This next flashback is also NonCon. Rape happens. So if you don't like, don't read.
"Make it stop! Make it stop!" Gilbert's eyes flew open. The screams of terror and of pain. They ripped through the calm night air and sadly this wasn't the first time tonight. Gilbert held the thrashing terrified form to him tightly. Trying to pin Roderich's arms so he wouldn't harm his hands even more.
This was the third day of this. It wasn't getting better. And Gilbert had no idea what to do at this point. Whispering the anthem did work, but being jolted awake by terrified screams caught him off guard. And it was a anthem he had to struggle to remember.
Softly he whispered the national anthem into the Austrian's ear. His words were cut short by another loud scream, Roderich curling up against him. Trying to get into some kind of fetal position.
"Don't Ivan, please,"
The Prussian shook his head brushing away the tears that were falling from lifeless violet eyes. Wide open in a terror that only Roderich could see. "Come on Austria," he whispered rubbing the man's back. Trying to sooth him and comfort him. He went back to the anthem.
Slowly the words did there trick. The thrashing and shivering stopped. Just soft panting, and sniffling. Gilbert ran his hands through the dark hair. It was a bit dirty, sweaty from the panic attack the Austrian just had, but Gilbert didn't care. It was the one thing that helped the Austrian fall asleep.
He laid the Austrian back in place, Gilbert taking his usual place beside him. His fingers never ceasing their movements through the dark hair.
He hoped that that would be it for tonight. Then they could both rest in peace. "Dream of music Roddy… dream of art. Dream that you're in one of those pretty pictures you have hung up in your home. Or the ones you go admire in the museums. Dream of when your home used to be full of people. You had one of the greatest houses. Remember those days." Gilbert whispered softly. Hoping some of his whispers would make it through. That something besides nightmares would penetrate the Austrian's mind.
His own dreams slowly taking him away.
There was a knock on the door. "Come on in, West. Ya know you don't gotta knock."
The Prussian began playing his flute again something soft and soothing for the Austrian. Even though the Austrian was asleep, he hoped it kept the demons at bay, like Roderich did for him after he had gotten back from Russia…
"Buenos dies, mi amigo!" said a cheerful voice entering the room. Gilbert stopped playing and looked at the dark skinned man happily. "Tony!"
The Spaniard beamed and held out a basket full of tomatoes. "I came to visit!"
The albino chuckled taking the basket. It really had nothing but tomatoes in it… "What brings you here?"
"To see my dear ex wife of course~" Antonio lowered his voice tip toeing to the other side of the bed where the Austrian was sleeping.
"Ex-wife? Oh yeah, yeah. I sometimes forgot you two were married. You never talk about it much. You got regrets?"
Antonio smiled up at the Prussian, he was reaching out carefully brushing a tanned hand against the pale cheek of the Austrian. "In a way. I wish it had gone better sometimes. But I adore Romano and am glad I have him. Roderich was embarrassed about the whole thing. And he only saw it as business, which it was, just to keep France in line. Heh." Antonio, ran his fingers through the chestnut hair. Smiling at the memories. "You didn't come to our wedding. But it was very beautiful… White roses and lilacs that matched Roderich's eyes." Antonio's emerald eyes stayed fixed on the Austrian and a sad smile graced his lips. "But when that night came to consummate the marriage…"
The Prussian tilted his head to the side confused. When he, Tony and Francis got drunk together they swapped conquest stories. Tony said Austria was an awesome lay, but it was true that no details were given. Just that it was good.
"I laid him down on the bed, and he was shaking like a leaf. His face was all cute and flushed. It was adorable. But his eyes. They were so frightened. It was obviously his first time, and I couldn't do it."
"What?" Gilbert said louder then he meant to.
"Your first time should be amazing, star child." Antonio said softly giving Gilbert a wink. "Not something the bosses are forcing upon you. I always thought he'd give it up to Hungary. Someone he loved and cared about. I can tell he's still innocent though."
"What?" Gilbert said again quieter though.
"Well, aside from Hungary telling me that they never did anything, you can tell by the way he acts. It's nice to know that we have a nation that's the complete opposite of Francis." The Spaniard laughed softly. "And we all know you never actually claimed Austria's vital regions."
"Psssh. I totally could have if I wanted to… Still," The Prussian leaned back in his chair looking over Tony. "I can't believe you lied bout that."
"I never went into any gory details. It would have been embarrassing to him. But not consummating my marriage… I had to lie about it. But, yes. Roderich, as far as I know is untouched. So you should be very pleased about that Gilbert." Another wink.
"Psh. Whatever." The Prussian looked away, a light flush appearing on his pale skin.
Antonio laughed softly leaning over the Austrian to whisper in the sleeping man's ear. "There is a reason he hangs at your house all the time, right mi amigo?"
"I'm just bored." Huffed the Prussian. He stood scowling slightly. "I need to stretch my legs and take a leak. Will you watch him?"
"Of course, of course." Antonio waved Gilbert away. The Prussian grabbing the basket of tomatoes and went downstairs. "West!" he called out once in the kitchen. "Tony gave us an ungodly amount of tomatoes. Make Ita-chan turn them into pasta sauce!" The albino set the basket on the counter.
"Stop shouting inside," the blonde sighed, stepping into their kitchen. He eyed the red fruits warily and sighed.
"Kesesese, you'll never believe what Tony told me! It's crazy! I'm totally gonna rag on Roddy about it when he wakes up and is feeling better."
"Oh?" The younger brother said not really interested.
"Yeah! Roddy still has his V-card! Kesesese. That's hilarious. He's like my age. Isn't that crazy?" The Prussian watched his brother's brow furrow and his mouth form a thin line. He stopped his cackling. "Ooooh, West… if you still have your V-Card… I'm taking you to a brothel, and we'll push Roddy with us in a wheelchair. Don't make me ashamed of you…"
"No, that's not it…" Ludwig hesitated for a moment. "Did you read the charts from the hospital?"
"Nein? Should I?"
"Yes."
Gilbert looked at his brother confused for a moment. What did the hospital paperwork have to do with anything? "It's in your office, ja?"
Ludwig nodded, taking the basket of tomatoes and putting the fruits in a more convenient place. The Prussian hurried back up the stairs and into his brother's study. He found a folder laying right on the desk. He opened it up, seeing Roderich's name and the hospital he had been at. Blah blah blah… broken wrists. Hands. Fingers. Mhm. He knew that. Ribs. Ruptured organs. Scarlet eyes scanned the page suddenly stopping. He froze. Trying to make it register.
And then familiar screams ripped through the house's silence.
He laid on top of his kitchen table. The cool wood felt nice against his skin. His sides were throbbing. That damn pipe had to have broken all his ribs… and his hands. He didn't even want to think about them. He'd try and move a finger and it would just give a painful throb. They were so swollen and didn't look like hands anymore. He couldn't stand the sight of them.
He'd never be able to play the piano again. Every night he could feel his body try and heal itself, and in the morning Ivan would break everything again. The only things that were in decent shape were his legs. The Russian liked watching him run around and try and get away.
He sighed as another clap of thunder roared over the house. The rain hadn't stopped since this began… how many day had passed? He lost count. It was always dark.
He heard the boots clack against the kitchen floor. More pain. More pain was coming. The Austrian attempted to curl up, knowing it would do no good.
"Austria~ Austria~ You're not looking so good anymore. Your skin is looking kind of grayish as of late. Maybe I'll stop hurting you and give you something more enjoyable, da?"
Roderich said nothing. He doubted Ivan really had anything enjoyable planned. His eyes widened slightly as he was forced onto off his side and onto his knees, his cheek still resting on the table.
Slowly he realized what was going to happen. And an all new sense of panic festered in him. He jerked away, trying to crawl off the table and escape.
The Russian wasn't letting him go anywhere. He felt a strong hand grab a fist full of his hair and without warning slam his head into the table. He was stunned in pain for a moment before he was finally able to focus on what was going on again. Cool air on skin that normally wasn't exposed….
Mein Gott… he felt hot tears forming in the corner of his eyes.
"Wha?" The Russian laughed suddenly, poking at his entrance with one of his thick fingers. Not penetrating but all the same… "I can't believe it! After all your marriages. And all that Prussian's talk of taking you, I find you untouched. The Bad Touch Trio certainly doesn't seem to live up to their name, do they?" Ivan laughed a child like laugh. "And I thought Hungary was kind of slutty and into some kinky stuff. She seemed to be back in when she lived with me~ She didn't take you either. I always saw her as the man in your relationship, you know~"
He felt more tears fall from his eyes. Liz… He didn't want to believe that she was touched. His innocent flower.
"I must be really lucky to have you all pure like, da?" Roderich cried out as the Russian's finger pushed into him, as much as he didn't want it to. It hurt. It hurt and burned.
He closed his eyes tight. Remembering Spain. Antonio.
"Roderich, you're shaking like a leaf!" the Spaniard said softly running his fingers along the Austrian's cheek.
"I'm sorry, I just don't have experience in this sort of thing… But it's our duty. So let's get this over and done with. His glasses were off, and he had an arm over his eyes. His cheeks flushed.
"Una y hecho con?" The Spaniard said shocked. "No… no. Love making is not an over and done with sort of thing." He sighed softly, rolling off the Austrian. "No, no."
Violet eyes peeked out at him, relief shining in them for a moment. "No?"
"You are to innocent. You haven't experienced it with someone you love and care about. I can't take you…"
"But… There is obligation,"
"Not at all!" Antonio laughed. "I will not do this if you feel it's just business. Love making is passion. And we should do it as such!"
"Danke…" Roderich said softly, sitting up and redoing his cravat. "I do apologize…"
"Nothing to apologize for! Maybe I can make you warm up to me and we can do this properly!"
Roderich smiled slightly at the Spaniard. "Maybe…"
The Austrian screamed out again as his entrance was being stretched by more intruders. It hurt and burned so bad.
"So tight so tight! You can't even take fingers without tearing!" The Russian said growing more and more irritated. "How useless. You'll never be able to take me. And this is taking to long. Slow, one by one, inch by inch. I just want to take what I want. Oh I know!" The Russian said happily.
Roderich felt a sick churning in his stomach. Whatever Ivan thought was a good idea probably wasn-
Everything in Austria's head stopped and was lost. The worst pain he had ever felt in his life was ripping through him. It felt as if his body was being ripped apart. He let out a terrible scream, his broken fingers clawing at the table only adding more pain to everything else.
Something cold and thick had been shoved into his narrow passage. Ripping and tearing him apart. The cold was dulled by hot blood covering the tool being used on him.
Ivan's laughing only slightly registered. Roderich could only scream and scream. Tears falling and falling from his eyes. Ivan just shoving that pipe in and out of him.
"Elizabeta."
"Yes Roderich." She looked up at him happily. Her jade eyes sparkling with happiness. She'd been by his side for years and years and now she was by his side in marriage.
"Will you do me a favor?"
"Anything for you." He felt her thin, but surprisingly strong arms wrap around him.
"Will you stay as pure as the flowers you wear in your hair? Forever and always?"
She looked at him surprised for a moment, and gave him a small smile. "Really? That's what you ask of me?"
"It is." he said softly, running a gloved hand against her cheek.
She shook her head still smiling at him. Almost as if she couldn't believe that he was asking for something so silly. "Yes. Yes Roderich, I will stay as pure as the flowers in my hair. Just for you."
"Danke. Danke Elizabeta."
"Of course, Roderich." She stood on her toes, pressing her lips against his gently.
Soon enough a feeling of absolute numbness settled within in him. He could still feel pain, but it was far away. Only a passing thought that his body was in agony.
"Eh? Gone silent have you. The Russian reached for the curl at the top of his head. It was tugged on roughly, but of course nothing happened. His curl didn't work like the Italians. Russia pouted slightly, giving it one last tug before giving up. "Every time I think I've found something interesting about you, I find I am disappointed." Ivan sighed pulling out his pipe, and undoing his pants. "Might as well just get this over with. I'm growing bored of you.
Again. There was pain. But it never registered. He didn't have a voice to scream with at the moment. All his tears had long since dried up.
The Russian gripped his face icy violet met dead lilacs. "I hate your eyes… Tomorrow I will remove them. I'm growing bored with you. It seems no one cares enough about you to come to your aid. It's been raining none stop in Vienna for a week straight. A clear sign that one of us is in trouble, and not a soul shows up at your door step. And if even if someone did come now. Who would want you. You're ruined. Used. Disgusting. And the one thing you're good at is no longer something you can do. Do you think your hands will ever play again? A worthless nation. Austria is a pretty place. You were never someone who was worthy of her title. So plain and boring. Now ruined and worthless. Truly no longer worthy of the name of Austria." Ivan laughed child like and walked away.
Ivan's words repeated through his head. He had been told quite often how plain he was. That's why he wore glasses, to add something to his boring features… Austria was beautiful country. He never felt he fit all that his country stood for.
Russia took his hands from him. The hands that made music. Tomorrow he'd lose his eyes, that could see sheets of music. The notes and scales that made the melodies. He hoped that Russia would also take a screwdriver to his ear, and ruin his hearing. So he could no longer hear music or melodies. He wished Russia would crush Vienna with all the power of his Russian army and kill his heart, so he could finally die.
Sometime later, Ivan came back because he was bored and raped him again. Unfortunately his voice had found itself, and all he could do was scream while the Russian laughed.
Gilbert bolted into the bedroom, the documents he had been reading just moments earlier, lay on the floor of his brother's study, forgotten.
Spain was holding the thrashing Austrian tightly in his arms. His expression pained, tears forming in the corners, but they did not fall from his emerald eyes. He was trying to sing a lullaby to the Austrian in Spanish but it wasn't working well.
The Prussian, was at the other side of the bed, gesturing for Antonio to lay Roderich down. Gilbert whispered the Austrian anthem, the usual ritual for when this happened. Emerald eyes looked over at Gilbert.
He could see the muscles twitching in a held back rage. The Prussian had a temper and he was about to lose it.
Antonio lowered his gaze. The Austrian's screams had been enough for him to decipher what had happened. He'd been at his fair share of tortures, giving and receiving. He knew what was done to people. "You can't go after him. It'll start a war."
"Tsk!" Gilbert snarled practically. His ruby eyes flashing in anger.
"What do you plan on doing?"
He didn't know. That's what he hated more then anything. He didn't know. The albino's face twisted into a pained expression of rage and sorrow. He ground his teeth together.
"It's unacceptable, Tony. I can take torture. Hungary could take it. You could take it, if it was you. Even Francis. But…" Roderich couldn't. Not Russia's torture. Not the taking of something like that. How do you recover from that? How do you help someone recover from that?
"Time." Antonio whispered softly, almost reading the albino's mind. "If you can't handle this then you need to hand Roderich off to Hungary…" The Prussian scoffed. "Because, if you do this and if you succeed in bringing him around, he'll cling to you. He'll cling to you tight. You'll be all he has. And, that comes with it's risks… You'll-"
"I'll need to love him."
The Spaniard nodded. "Si."
"I need to love him. And I need to prepare for the rejection from him too."
"Si."
The Prussian sighed sitting back in his chair. This was serious. He had to think about this.
"Yoooo, Awsteeeahhh!" The Prussian,, grabbed the Austrian by the front of his jacket, his scarlet eyes gleaming. His sword at the Austrian's neck not enough force to break the man's skin, of course. "So how do you feel, having Silesia taken away from you by force?" He asked. "Ahahahaha! You're quite weak!"
Defiant violet eyes looked back at him. "Get your hands off of me,"
"Get a painter in here!" The Prussian said jokingly to a few of his men, "We have to immortalize Austria's beaten face!" Austria's face turned pained and he looked away, embarrassed, humiliated. Defeated.
Scarlet eyes focused on the defeated form in front of him now. Tony's words from earlier ringing in his ear. A reason why he was always at Roderich's house. Cause his was boring, of course. Plus, Roderich played awesome music. It made him forget all the shitty times in Russia. Made him fall back in time when he was even more awesome then he was now. Roderich's cooking was way better then West's. And West was amazing! That's why he was always around.
But if that was the only reason then why did he feel the need to antagonize the Austrian. Go out of his way to pick on and insult? To see the Austrian react to his teasing. See him flush in embarrassment or his eyes flash angrily. And sometimes he could get a small smile from the aristocrat.
"Well fuck." he said at last. Antonio looked at him smiling slightly, "Emotions suck,"
Ahahaha," Spain laughed warmly. "Well, you need to decide soon. Because the healing process will begin before you know it, and-"
"I'm not handing him over to Hungary!" The Prussian said definitely. "He's staying with me."
"But-"
"I'll fucking deal with the consequences, obviously."
Antonio looked at the Prussian warily. "I don't think you quite understand what you're getting yourself into…"
The Prussian shifted uneasily in his seat. "I'll figure it out. Roddy was there for me, when I got back. He played his violin and piano. And was by my bedside when West needed a break. I'd be the biggest dick ever if I didn't return the favor."
"Yes, but. You are you… You're like a-"
"I swear to God, Tony, if you compare me to a tomato I'll knock you out, right here."
The Spaniard smiled, and continued. "You are like a ripe tomato. It wasn't easy but you managed to become perfect. No weird chemicals where used on you, you fought off bugs and animals. And you look splendid! Now, Roderich, well he was grown in a green house. Fancy, I know. He had fancy chemicals and was always safe. Well, one day. The door was left open and all the outside elements got to him. He wasn't used to it. And he got really sick. Now he's on the verge of rotting away. It's going to take a lot of work, but you can save tomato Roderich, but you need to really put all your heart into it."
"Tony…" The Prussian sighed. "I got it, I didn't need you to explain it to me. I know why it's not the same. I was dealing with mostly physical pain and recovery. But I had my share of mental shit too. And Roderich's music truly helped me through it all. Look. I said I knew what I was getting into. And I do. I've been kicking and tormenting Austria for years, if I end up getting really screwed in the end, then it's just a shit load of what's Japan call it..? Oh, Caramel, coming back at me.
"Caramel?" Spain questioned.
"Yeah, caramel, you do bad things to someone, you get bad things done to you. Caramel."
The Spaniard nodded. "I see." He still had doubts. Especially when it wasn't his concern of Prussia becoming to attached to Austria and getting hurt. Austria would cling to him and need him. Roderich would probably end up loving and needing Gilbert more then anything. It was Tony's fear that Prussia could not return these feelings. And Austria would just end up getting worse.
"Gilbert." Both men looked down at the bed. Violet eyes slowly fluttered open. Warm pools of sleepy violet slowly losing their life and becoming dull and dead. The dead sort of violet Spain had seen earlier during the panic attack.
A bandaged hand reached out for the Prussian and Gilbert scooted off his chair onto the side of the bed in a second. He took the bandaged hand in his, his thumb running over the top of the broken hand gently.
"Hey, how are you feeling?"
Tears fell past the dark lashes, the Austrian struggling to say he was fine. Prussia wiped them away without a word. His pale hand moving to run through the dark hair soothingly.
"We should probably get some real food in ya, ja?" The Prussian smiled sincerely, his scarlet eyes filled with what the Spaniard could only place as concern… and affection maybe? "How about cake?"
"C-Cake?" The Austrian asked, a spark of life appearing in those violet eyes. It only lasted a second, but it did appear.
"Yeah! West made some this morning. It's not as good as yours, but cake is cake, ja?"
"I'd love some cake…"
"Kesesesese, I thought you would!" he helped the Austrian sit up a little.
Spain smiled, standing up. It seemed that he really hand noting to worry about. He walked past the bed, ruffling the Prussian's hair as he left.
"Tony? You leaving?" Gilbert asked tearing his attention away from the Austrian for a moment.
"Si. Seems things are going to be just fine, eventually." He smiled warmly at the both of them. "Que te mejores pronto, Roderich. And Adios to the both of you." He gave them a wave and took his leave.
He had been worried, but seeing Gilbert leap into action like that, without even a thought or hesitation. Genuine feelings from the other. He had nothing to worry about it seemed. They would be fine.
It would just take time and work. Gilbert would be all right. The Spaniard had always assumed that the Prussian felt something towards the Austrian. While he wished it was under better circumstances, this in the end, would help them both. And while the other alternative would have been nice…them driving each other crazy to the point where someone eventually just got bent over the piano… Well… that could still happen~
Spain laughed softly. He'd couldn't wait to tell Romano that soon they would have someone to go on double dates with! His little Italian would be so happy!
A/N
In case you didn't know, Prussia was talking about Karma. But he kept calling caramel.
Once more thank you for all the reviews and sorry this took so long. And thanks for the corrections. I felt like one of those anime characters an arrow of fail stabbing me in the head ^^;;. But if it helps me get better, then I'm grateful to them. Just note that one thing I can't change is how I write. The style of it. I describe things in a certain way and it may seem a little weird to you, but it's how I've always done things. Sometimes people really like it, sometimes they don't. To each their own.
But I reread this a bunch of times, even let it sit for a day and came back to read it, hopefully there aren't to many mistakes .
This chapter was originally supposed to have Liechtenstein not Spain coming. All that Spain stuff, flashback of non con and all was supposed to be next chapter. But I just kept getting stuck. So I scrapped it. That's why the non con chapter came suddenly. I'm not terribly pleased that I couldn't stretch things out longer before that sequence. But it is what it is. I can move onto other things with the story now.
But I hope you enjoyed. Till next time