Disclaimed

=pRiCe RaNge=

Natsume

I was about to pull over. But I couldn't allow myself to do that. When my car passed her I felt like turning around. That was so unlike me. I kept driving. Stopping to get her was too much caring for me to handle.

Mikan

I'll be running out of money soon if I keep drinking. Champagne isn't cheap. So Hyuuga doesn't have my notebook? Then who has it? I need to write somewhere though, or else my school books will be filled with my emotional crap. Why did I have to be this way?

When I woke up yesterday I wondered why my alarm clock didn't go off. "Oh, It's a Saturday." I still had about 3 hours until my shift at McDonalds. I took a bath and brushed my teeth to get rid of the stench of alcohol.

I was an hour early at work and they didn't need my help so I had nothing to do. I was walking around the block and I saw a cute store. When I went in realized it was a scrapbooking-store-place. I was on my way out of the frill filled store when I heard an middle aged lady on the counter call out "We have a sale today on our notebooks." She was pretty. When she approached me she had a sample of the notebook in hand. "Beautiful" I said in an awed tone. The notebook was handmade and the cover was made of dried sakura petals and it had calligraphy done on the front that said "Words are precious but the innocence of the one who uses them are what matters most." "How much?" I said running my finger at the side of the paper. "$50". That was 1/2 of my pay check. Working at a fast food joint doesn't pay much. "I'm getting paid today. Can you hold on to it for me?" I asked hopingly. "I will." She smiled. "I'll see you later then." I nodded at her and left for work.

I was lying on my bed and holding my new notebook in my hand. I took a pen from my backpack and started writing...

Missing You

Why did you have to leave?
I knew this day was to come
but not this soon.

I didn't expect the hurt
And I didn't expect the pain
When you left a part of me
Would never be whole again.

I regret not holding on while I could
I regret not following your advice when I knew I should.
But I cherish the moments when we were together
Because those moments will be in my memories forever.

My greatest wish before you left
Was to have time to give you a special gift
one that fit all your needs
To repay all the deeds
That I have witnessed you perform.

I was thinking of Xavier again...Xavier was my first Umm... boyfriend. He was an American. He left me for his studies in the states. He left me without a good bye. He just suddenly left. The night before he did he slipped a note in my bag. The note said "Sweet Sakura let me fly..." That was what started me to write these poems. I was still in high school then...Still dealing with my parents. I never did really get over him. Even when I was dating again. I clutched the notebook in my hands. I would write in this notebook then. But I was sure as hell that I wouldn't forgive Hyuuga for taking my old one.

A few days Later...

Natsume

"Imai. I went out with her. Can you give me back the notebook?" I was angry for some reason. I just didn't know why. But I knew that I had to give Sakura back her notebook. "You barely saw each other. She left after 10 minutes. I don't think that qualifies as 'going out'." She said in a dead tone. "Hn." I couldn't argue with her on that. She was right. Well I don't know what to do now. So I decided to take a nap somewhere.

Mikan

I cut class because even if I did attend I would still fall asleep. When I got out I immediately headed for the Sakura tree to do a bit of writing. I held the pen in my hand but I didn't have anything to write about at the moment. I closed my eyes and took in the sweet air that surrounded the cherry blossom tree. "Your scent drew me near. But you were also poisonous as I feared. I was already lost in your eyes but I was utterly repulsed by your low lies...I've hurt you and you me but I have fallen in love with you can't you see?" I was unconsciously constructing a poem. It seemed so refreshing to actually say the words. But to whom I wanted to say them to I had no clue.

I didn't realize then that I fell asleep.

Natsume

I was up in the Sakura tree when I heard a tear filled voice speak. When she spoke I felt her tears fall. When she stopped I heard nothing but her even breathing. So I came down took a look at the girl. She was on the other side of the tree. I could only see her back from where I stood. I saw her hair being wisped by the wind. I came closer to see her face. She was asleep. "Sakura?" I said a little confused. Everyone was supposed to be in class. She looked so innocent as she slept. "Don't leave me..." She said in a dreamy voice. I thought she was awake. She squirmed a little but didn't awake. I just stared at her.

There was something about her that I didn't know. Something I surprisingly wanted to know about. I couldn't stop what I felt now. I was already caring for her. I brushed the hair out of her face and was about to leave her to sleep. Then I saw a pink covered notebook in her hand. "Sakura petals." I murmured in a soft voice. This tree obviously mattered to her. I didn't mean to pry but I wanted to know what she was writing about. It might give him a clue about the words she spoke before she fell asleep. When I opened the notebook I saw only one page filled. "It's new" I mused. After I read it I was only more confused. I placed the notebook back in her hands. I stared at her for quite awhile. Thinking.

When I was about to leave I saw her eyes flutter open. "Hyuuga." I guess she was awake now. "Hn." She looked at the notebook in her hand and clutched it to her chest. That thing was obviously important to her. "Do you have my notebook now?" She wasn't facing me. "No." Although she didn't face me I felt her disappointment. The silence was gone when the bell rang. "Lunch Break." I don't know why I said it though. I wasn't even hungry and if I went in there everyone would be looking at me. I shuddered internally at the thought.

"Would you like to have lunch with me?" That was weird of her to ask. "I have an extra bento here. I made it in case I get hungry later but since you're here..." Bento? A lunch box? I stopped bringing those since Middle School. She brought out the two containers from her backpack. "Here." She said handing me the box. "You don't have to eat it here with me if you don't want to." She was opening hers. "Hn." I sat at the other side of the tree. I was holding the bento but I didn't opened it. "You know Hyuuga I'm trying not to be angry at you anymore. I am upset about losing it but maybe its better of lost." I was staring at the blossoms that were falling for a while. "I'm done eating. I'll leave first then." I was still sitting there the lunch box in my hand.

Mikan

I'm giving up on the notebook. I'm giving up on hating Hyuuga. I'll just go back to the way things were. I feel better when I'm alone anyway. Actually I wasn't finished eating when I left. I just couldn't be in a place like that. The Sakura Tree was in full blossom. The blooms were falling and floating. It was too much of a reminder so I left. I threw the rest of my lunch in the trash. Maybe you're thinking why I have a bento right? Well it's because I can't afford to eat in the cafeteria. I was broke. I could ask my parents for money but I don't want to bother their lives. I have to be independent. I have no one but myself. I have to get promoted or something. Hotaru could help me but it was so much to ask from her and I didn't want her to worry about me again.

I went home that night, cleaning out my closet. I had a lot of clothes because of my parents. The clothes they sent were still in good condition and they could be considered expensive. I cleaned out half my closet. I had to give up my gray knitted gloves, my light pink skinny jeans, eight of my blouses and T-shirts, 3 of my gowns and 6 of my gorgeous cocktail dresses. Including the one I wore when I went to 'Vines' with Hyuuga. And a bunch of other stuff. I could sell them to my classmates. I was left with half of it. Which was still a lot but the clothes were one of the things my parents left for me. I felt sad to let them go. But I needed the money..

The next day. School.

"Mikan are you really selling this gorgeous dress?" Anna was a fashionista herself so I felt comfortable selling her the cream cocktail dress. "Umm..Yeah, I won't have a chance to use it again anyway?" I wouldn't use it again anyway. It reminded me of the lost notebook. "Again? When did you use it? How come I didn't see you wear it?" She really did pay attention to what people around her wore. "I wore it to a 'private' occasion." I whispered to her so our other classmates who were looking at my clothes wouldn't hear. "Oh." Anna said still eyeing the dress. "I'll buy that cream cocktail dress for $300." I knew that cold voice. "Hotaru? Why would you buy it?" She wasn't the type to use something someone else already used. "It seems to be in good condition. I want it." She told me handing me the thick bills. "$300 for my dress? Hotaru you could just buy something new with this much cash." Not that I didn't need the money but I don't want to cheat my best friend. "I want that one." She said in a nonchalant tone as she snatched the dress from Anna. Anna looked as surprised as I did. "Hotaru-chan I think Mikan is right. You can buy at least 3 new cocktail dresses with that much money." Anna told Hotaru. I was still looking at the wad of cash in my hands. Where did Hotaru get the money? Why would she waste it on a used dress? It was too weird for me to handle so I just didn't think about it anymore.

After I sold all of the clothes I brought to school I when to the sakura tree to count how much I money I made. "$200 for all the stuff I sold. Oh! And the $300 Hotaru gave me for the cream dress...I MADE $500! My jaw dropped at how much I made. Wow. That was more than I expected. Hotaru buying the cream dress greatly increased how much I made. I wonder what she wants it for? Never mind. I was financially ok for now. I took out the bento since I think I couldn't stand to be this hungry anymore. After eating I didn't want to get up yet. Hotaru is going to be so mad that I cut class again.

I closed my eyes and took in the scent of the tree again. I could really smell it this time because it was windy today. 'Sweet Sakura Let Me Fly...' I can't let go of you, Xavier. I want to but I just can't. "Polka Dots, What an interesting choice of underwear you have Sakura-san" I immediately opened my eyes to see that crimson eyed devil in front of me. "YOU PERVERT! DON'T YOU RESPECT A LADY'S SPACE!" I was so humiliated. Oh my gosh! What am I supposed to do now! I hate you forever Hyuuga! My face was flushed deep red with pure embarrassment. My hands pulled down my skirt which flew up without me realizing it. Dang this weather! "WELL!" I demanded an explanation from this pervert! This handsome...HANDSOME? Mikan get yourself together! I scolded myself. "I didn't choose to see it. My eyes were forced to look at that distracting piece of a panty you had on." Then he walked away without another word. What a walk-out-king. "UGH!" Why did this have to happen to me?

When I got home I went to my underwear drawers. I love polka dots. "Hmp. Not my fault that he dislikes my choice of underwear. AHH! BUT STILL THAT WAS SO EMBARASSING!" I won't change my underwear choice just because of him. I'll just NEVER wear SKIRTS again. I went to my closet and removed all the skirts I had. I didn't care if it was long or short as long as it was a skirt I removed it from my closet. It was only then that I realized I was a 'skirt person'. I won't sell my skirts. I took a box and stuffed the skirts in it and I put the box under my bed. I made a big mess in my room. There were clothes everywhere. I thought I sold a lot already. I began folding all my clothes and stacked them by pants, shorts, shirts, dresses, leggings etc. I put in the pants where the skirts were. All done. FINALLY.

The Next Day (Friday, After Class)

I was going to a dance club with the old gang from high school tonight. I haven't seen a lot of them lately. I would be riding with Hotaru and Ruka. I was finished taking a bath and I was currently deciding on what to wear. I wore my black leather tights, my black 4-inch heel boots, a gray sleeveless micro dress which reached below the mid thigh. I wore a silver bracelet with sakura blossom charms on it. I wore my hair down and slightly curled the sides. I wore black eyeliner and a light pink lip. I had a natural blush on my cheeks so there was no need to use tint on it. When I looked in the mirror I almost didn't recognize myself. "Pretty" I said to my reflection. I decided to play a little game on them tonight. I went to my bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet and took out my contact lens. I did a little cosplay before so I had a variety of different contacts. I used a silvery light blue. I loved my 'new eyes'. I called Hotaru and told her not to pick me up. I would just walk to the club. It wasn't that far anyway. I wore my oversized sunglasses and headed out the door. I wonder who would be first to recognize me. I smiled.

When I entered the club it was like everyone stopped moving. When I forced a smile they all seemed to be stunned in place. I wondered why they weren't like that when I was myself. When I removed the sunglasses their reactions became worse. Everyone was staring into my eyes. I was searching for our table and when I found that even they were staring at me like I was a stranger. When I looked at Hotaru though she knew it was me immediately. She didn't tell the others though. She knew it was me because we were together when I got the contacts. I approached the table and sat beside Anna. I decided to speak in English to conceal my identity. None of them besides Hotaru knew that I spoke another language. I learned because of...never mind. "Hello every one. I missed you all so much!" They were all dumb struck. "Excuse me miss, but may I ask how you know us?" Said the ever polite Ruka. "I'm hurt guys. You don't remember me?" I said in a flawless manner. "Maybe they don't remember you because you were so different in High School." Hotaru said in English as flawless as mine. I nodded. "Maybe." I said as I sat beside Hotaru. It was then that I realized Hyuuga was also in our table. I didn't realize I was starring at him until he looked at me. I forced a smile and his crimson eyes widened.

Hotaru ordered beer for everyone and a bottle of their sweetest champagne. "Arigatou Hotaru-chan." I whispered to Hotaru's ear. A couple of shots later we were all on the dance floor. Well except for Hyuuga. They still didn't know who I was. I would tell them later. I told myself. I was randomly dancing when a big buff guy with a beard pulled me from the dance floor. He pinned me to the wall and was forcing his mouth on mine. Oh dear Lord help me! I wanted to scream but I was already drunk. I was struggling from his hold on my hands as he forced himself on me. I was using all the strength I had but he was too strong. I was crying already. He was pinning me with only one hand which left his other hand roaming in forbidden places in my body. SOMEONE SAVE ME! PLEASE! Oh God no! Then he stopped suddenly, let go off me and ran. There was chaos around me. People were screaming. I fell on the floor and everything went black...

When I regained consciousness I was on a bed of pure Egyptian cotton sheets. Was I in heaven? Then I remembered everything that happened. That man. I shuddered and cried. I felt so defenceless...so unclean... I gripped the blankets around my shoulders. I opened my eyes to see a room bigger than my living room. Where am I? A thousand thoughts filled my head. Was I in that man's house? What happened? And so on. I heard the door creak open. I was afraid and confused. I looked around the room for something to hit with. I grabbed a lamp beside the enormous bed I was on. I saw a shadow of a man and I flung the lamp. It hit his head. " What the?" That voice was familiar. When I saw the man's face or rather his eyes I was blushing like a little school girl. Hyuuga. "You're awake." I thought I saw him smile but it was probably me imagination. "Hai, gomen for causing you trouble. Can I ask how I ended up here?" I said in a shaky voice. It was only then that I realized I had a headache. Probably from all the drinking yesterday and the fact that I fainted somewhere. I fainted! That's it! There was chaos in the club that's why the bearded man ran... I didn't feel the tears steaming down my face and I didn't hear the sobs shaking my body. Things could have been worse. Much worse. "Can 'hiccup' use 'hiccup' your 'hiccup' bathroom?" I said as I tried standing up which took a lot of my strength. "Yeah, sure right there." He said pointing to a door inside the room.

When I was inside the bathroom I washed my face and looked at my reflection. I have to get the contacts out of my eyes before it causes irriation. Then I realized I wasn't wearing them anymore. Which means he knows I'm Mikan. How did he know I was wearing contacts? I looked horrible on top of it all. The eyeliner got smudged because of my crying and I look flushed. "AH!" I was so mad. How could all these things happen to me! I should have known better than trying to become beautiful again. It only causes me problems. I'm ugly inside anyway why not show it on the outside as well right? I kept slapping my face. How much more idiotic could I get! You don't deserve to be happy! I said to myself. That's why he left you. That's why they ALL LEFT YOU. A voice in my head said. "NO! NO! NO!" I said to my reflection. "It's not my fault...not my fault...not my fault...not my fault...not my fault..." I was on the bathroom floor. I grabbed my hair trying to pull them from the roots. "AH!" I screamed as hot tears rolled down my cheeks. Hideous sobs escaped my chest. "Just let me die instead will you!" I said to the ceiling. "Let me die..." ...

NATSUME

I heard everything she said on the other side of the bathroom door. It's just a door not a sound proof bomb shelter how could I not hear her? I heard her screams, her yearning, her sadness... Then I heard her sobs. They tore at my heart, if I still have one. I turned the knob and opened the door to find a shattered girl lying on the floor. Staring blankly at the ceiling saying "Not my fault...let me die..." over and over like a mantra. I don't think she was aware of what she was doing because she didn't protest when I carried her back to the bed.

Even though her eyes were wide open. She wasn't there in the room. She was somewhere see didn't want to be. How do I know that? I see the unconscious tears rolling down her once rosy cheeks. Having her here made me realize that I wasn't a complete robot. I took out my handkerchief and wiped her tears. Last night was a disaster...

Flashback

I saw Sakura being touched by a weird man. I was about to interfere but the police stormed in yelling something about a rapist they were chasing. Everyone ran everywhere. I saw Sakura faint so I called Imai who told me in advance that it was Sakura that was dressed like a foreigner. Imai just gave me a look that seemed to say save her yourself idiot. Then Imai ran out with Ruka. "Tch." Why does it have to fall in my hands? We hate each other. I carried Sakura to my car. She barfed about 5 times before we reached my house. I didn't want to bring her there but I don't know where she lives. And Imai won't answer her phone.

"Good evening master. Oh my! How may I help?" My butler said. "Bring her to my room and have Riu change her clothes." I still have to bring my car to a carwash. It reeked of the smell of alcohol a Sakura's barf.

When I came back Sakura was asleep. "Master, I removed her contact lenses." Riu the head maid of the household said. She gave me the contact lenses. After she left I sat down beside the bed. I knew it wouldn't help the situation if I slept next to her. When I turned on the lamp next to the bed something on her wrist glimmered. I took out her wrist and looked at the bracelet she wore. She sure is obsessed with Sakura trees. The bracelet doesn't look cheap. When she moved slightly I placed her wrist back on the bed and took out a manga I was reading.

End of flashback

While I wiped her tears I kissed her cheek lightly. I was surprised at myself. "Stop torturing yourself." I scolded at her. Suicidal freak. I said internally.

Yay! Hmm... Tell me what you think guys! R&R! I crave your reviews ;) till the next chapter!

As the petals fell I fell in love...

As the flower grew I blossomed

As the flower withered I lost you as well

-Xiao WaWa