A/N: This particular drabble was inspired by the random prompts 'distance' and 'insomnia'. As it turns out, they work perfectly together. Also, there is very little of the sexy in here. It turned out unabashedly romantic instead. Perhaps I'll write a sequel taking place during their reunion.
Also wracked my brains for a compelling title but came up empty, so longing it is.
Longing
The ceiling was boring, not something she would normally examine this closely, but Mai was unable to sleep. She had laid in the dark with her eyes screwed shut for what seemed like hours, trying to force herself into slumber. All the forcing in the world hadn't helped one bit. So she had lit the bedside lamp, put her hands behind her head and proceeded to stare up at the plain tiles above her. The longer she stared, the more Mai realized just how plain they were. There was not a mark, not a scratch, not an imperfection to be seen. "Oh, well," she whispered, letting a gust of air leave her mouth.
The reason for her sleeplessness wasn't a mystery. The Fire Lady knew exactly why the blissfulness of rest wouldn't come. Zuko, the Fire Lord, her husband, was away, and he would continue to be away for an entire week. And this night was only the first one. The distance between them made her ache and she longed for the feel of his perpetually warm body beside her.
Under normal circumstances, she would be curled up around him or he around her, their bodies molded together, their breathing synchronized. His hand might brush against her breast, whether inadvertently or on purpose and a little thrill of heat would shoot through her body, centering in her loins. Sometimes he kissed her neck, or her bare shoulder or that little spot right behind her ear, flicking his tongue out occasionally and making her squirm.
"You're pathetic, Mai," she chastised herself vehemently. One night, only one night, not even an entire one,and already she missed Zuko more than words could possibly describe. With a frustrated huff, she turned over, burying her face into the silky softness of her pillow. She sighed heavily and her warm breath surrounded her, reminding her of Zuko once again.
Angry with herself now, she rolled over and got out of bed, heading for the couch, grabbing her robe on the way and tying the silk sash neatly about her waist. "Maybe some reading will help," she mused. Mai lit another lamp and reached for her current favorite, opening the volume to the page she had marked. Her eyes traversed the words, but their meaning was lost to her. They were nothing but a series of black scribbles on white paper.
Groaning with frustration, she tossed the book across the room, cringing when she heard it impact something, a vase perhaps or some other knick knack. The object, whatever it was, fell to the floor and shattered into pieces. Mai hoped it wasn't something Zuko valued too much. "It's his fault," she muttered unreasonably. "He shouldn't have left with Aang. No, it's Aang's fault for coming here unannounced and whisking my husband away; stupid, flighty airbender."
The guard outside was concerned by the noise and called to Mai through the door. "Is everything all right, my lady? I heard something break."
"Fine," she growled. "No, wait a minute." She yanked the door open and ordered the guard to find a servant to make her some tea, chamomile. "That Uncle of his swears by it. Oh, and I want cookies too, lots of them." If she couldn't have Zuko, at least she could have cookies. They were a poor substitute, but what was a lonely woman, unable to sleep, supposed to do?
She paced the rooms she shared with Zuko then, following the same circuit over and over. When the tea and cookies arrived, she snatched them from the servant, shut the door a little too firmly and sat down to eat. Whatever they usually tasted like, the flavor wasn't coming through now. The cookies were like sawdust in her mouth.
She and Zuko usually had a cup of chamomile tea before going to bed, especially if the day had been a trying one. Relaxed and drowsy, sleep came easily, whether after lovemaking or not. Without him there, the ritual had no meaning. Desperate now, Mai flung open the door once again and announced to the guard that she would be taking a walk in the gardens, alone. Perhaps the fresh air, cool now that autumn had arrived, and some exercise, would tire her out.
Walking briskly, her black hair blowing about in the breeze, Mai circled the entire palace gardens once, taking a few minutes to sit on one of her favorite benches, a favorite spot of hers and Zuko's actually. They often came out to the gardens to get away from the council or correspondence for awhile. The gardens held more than a few good memories.
The couple had spent their share of nights out there too, beneath the bright, white moonlight or under a starless sky, heavily darkened with clouds. Sometimes even the bed got boring after all and making love outside after sparring or cuddling or picnicking provided the change they occasionally craved.
Mai smiled nostalgically at the nearby apple tree. She had sat alone under it many times as a child visiting Azula. Zuko and she had often sat beneath it too, the Fire Lord leaning against the trunk and Mai leaning against him, his arm around her shoulder, his lips pressed to her temple.
Hugging herself tightly, Mai tried to imagine that her arms were Zuko's. She closed her eyes for a bit, and recalled the feel of his strong embrace. For a moment it seemed real and Mai could almost smell Zuko, the scent of his skin, that underlying hint of fire.
"I miss you," she whispered to the night.
A servant found the Fire Lady in the gardens the following morning, stretched out on the bench, the early morning sun illuminating her beautiful face. Finally she slept. Rather than wake her, he tiptoed away, leaving I instructions with everyone to do the same.
"She misses the Fire Lord," the servant reminded the others. "And she's a regular mooselion when she's tired."
Far away, in the Western Air Temple, Zuko tossed and turned in one of the refurbished rooms Aang had wanted so badly for him to see. The Fire Lord liked Aang. He liked Aang very much and considered the teen one of his dearest friends. But Zuko did not want to be there. Zuko did not appreciate the younger man's random acts of spontaneity when they took him away from his wife, the only one he would trust to manage Fire Lord business in his unplanned for absence.
"Stupid Avatar," he murmured.
He wasn't really angry at Aang, but he hated being away from Mai. It was tolerable during the day, since work often kept them apart for hours at a time anyway. But the night was different. Night was their special time, time when they lay with limbs entwined and lips pressed together until sleep claimed them both.
His arms ached to hold her and he blinked back the beginnings of tears. "Agni, Zuko, you will not cry," he admonished himself, finishing off with a smack to the head. "Just imagine what Sokka would say if he could see you."
The Fire Lord grinned at that thought and achieved a semblance of control over his emotions. Still unable to sleep, he padded out into the open air and lay down with a blanket and a pillow. Looking up at the stars he imagined Mai staring up at the same ones and felt a bit better.
"Miss you, Mai," he said softly and wriggled, trying to find a comfortable spot free of stones.
It was almost dawn before he slept. Aang found him a few hours later. He had a hand out, ready to shake his friend awake, but taking a good look at Zuko's face, reconsidered.
"Poor guy," the Avatar said quietly. "You'll be back with Mai soon."