I'm going to try and make sure this chapter isn't filled with Sybil simply crying in Elsie's sitting room. Funnily enough, between this chapter and the last, the war has been and gone ;) This is set early December before Sybil turns 21 so therefore she's;

Twenty

She awoke as early as usual, her normal routine would be to dress herself and make her way downstairs to make her rounds. She might be mistaken for one of the servants, but she wasn't; she was Lady Sybil Crawley, youngest daughter of the Earl of Grantham, yet she got up at the same time as the kitchen maids and acted more like the servants than her family – she wasn't what they'd expected that was for sure.
But now she awoke without a need to get up, the war was over and she would have to return to being a lady and hang her nurse's uniform up for the last time.

She turned over in her bed to see her uniform, hung as it always was, she felt a tear slide down her cheek, she didn't want things to go back to the way they were. As horrifying as war was, she had to admit it gave her a whole new purpose in life, she knew what it was to work and to feel useful, her sisters helped when the house became a convalescent home but they weren't proper nurses and didn't seem to mind everything going back to normal – she did, she minded very much.
The room was cold as the fire wasn't lit while she was a nurse, the only light was the dim light from the moon, it was dark for too long now it was winter. The clock read almost half past five, she couldn't very well simply go back to sleep, she'd have to do something.
She got out of bed, put her tiny feet into her slippers and pulled on her robe, checking her hair wasn't too messy, she quietly opened the door and left her room.

The only sound was the quiet patting of her slippers against the floor; she stood with her hands on the rail leaning over the see the hall, now devoid of tables as it had been set up, it was now back as it used to be. Looking out over what she was destined to have, she should one day be married to an equally rich man and have her own estate, bring up her own daughters to be ladies and do everything that is expected of them, never to rebel against the rules, simply to obey and know that's their place. Or she could have what she wanted, she could be with someone she loved, she could work, have money enough to support herself but not so much she was supposedly better than other people. She could have her ticket out of this life, he was waiting, he was willing to wait forever for her. Could she really turn him down? She knew she loved him, but she wasn't yet sure if she should take the risk. She knew her family would disapprove but she was perfectly happy to be friends with everyone while being married to Branson – she saw no problem, unfortunately they did.
She'd have to make this decision on her own, her main confidant would never agree it was a good idea, her maid wouldn't risk her job by agreeing, her lover would clearly want her to be with him and her family were the whole issue. She was left alone; her three friends were all biased on the matter. So she had a boring, pointless life with a forbidden romance thrown in just to shake things up.
She sighed and it was echoed through the empty corridor, walking down the stairs she felt as if every step she was taking was dragging her back to her old life. Starting in the library, she walked through every room, taking in the emptiness of each one. She reached the drawing room and had a flashback of a moment from sixteen years ago; she'd been sitting on the settee in the drawing room, her sisters on either side of her, being 7 and 9, their feet could reach the floor but hers were too short so she sat there swinging them. Her grandmother had been droning on about something to their mother and completely ignoring them but as ladies they were supposed to 'sit there and look nice.' Her eyes wandered around the room, taking in all the grandeur that she would one day come to appreciate (her grandmother's words.) Her eyes fell to the tall, intimidating butler standing near the door staring blankly ahead, until he noticed a pair of big blue eyes looking intently at him, he looked down at her and winked, he wasn't half as intimidating when he smiled at her; she couldn't help but blush and look away, pretending she hadn't been looking. She pretended to be interested in what her grandmother was saying, until she heard the door open; her head whipped round causing her hair to hit Edith in the face, she beamed up to her ears when she saw the housekeeper walk in.

She never knew why she remembered that, she didn't remember anything after it, simply that she'd been so happy to see Mrs Hughes. She remembered her body warming up and she couldn't stop smiling at her, she was glad the woman had taken a shine to her as she constantly followed her around. That day had been one of Cora's attempts to make her more interested in family matters – she was only four and they already suspected something was different about her.
She turned to leave the room, wherever she went there were memories of how she disliked her life and how she'd always preferred to be with Mrs Hughes.

She turned and walked towards the stairs, not the main stairs, but the servant's stairs, she was taking a risk by doing this, but she'd always promised to be there for her no matter what. She might not have meant at six in the morning but she went none the less.

Elsie had just woken; she sat at her small mirror, brushing her hair as she did every morning. She sighed as she looked at it, for once she'd like to wear it down, but it was highly inappropriate for her to do so. She left it lying over her shoulders as she walked to her wardrobe, she was scared out of her wits however to hear a knock at the door, who would be knocking on her door at quarter to six? She had no need of Daisy to wake her up as she woke earlier than all the other maids anyway. She opened it and was even more shocked as she saw who was there,

"Lady Sybil, what on earth are you doing up here?" she whispered, rather too fiercely, the way she would address a maid.

"I I'm sorry , I just wanted to come and see you" she was rather taken aback, but seeing the scared expression on the young girls face, Elsie's features softened and she moved aside to let Sybil enter the room. Sitting cross legged on the bed, Sybil got a pretty good idea of just how different their worlds were by the size and style of Elsie's room.
Sitting on an armchair opposite, Elsie put her hands on her lap;

"What was it you wanted to see me about?" she smiled sweetly.

"Oh, I don't know, I was just wandering the house"

"At this time of morning?"

"I would normally be up now, I haven't been able to alter my body clock" she looked down at her lap. Elsie leant over and covered one of Sybil's small hands with her own.

"You'll find something to do m'girl. They'll keep you busy no doubt." Confused as to why she received a pair eyes rolling at this she continued;

"You knew this would happen eventually, things change."

"Not fast enough" she mumbled angrily, looking away before looking back at Elsie, her bright blue eyes outshining Elsie's, although blue they didn't have quite the same sparkle that Sybil's had . But despite their sparkly nature, they were now piercing Elsie's, filled with anger and isolation.

Elsie took her hand away, sat up straight and looked right back at her.

"I'm not going to lecture you on what you already know, I won't encourage it either. But I won't tell you you can't as I'm not your mother"

"You're as good as. Mostly better" Sybil interrupted, never taking her eyes off Elsie.
Elsie felt her heart warm at this statement, of course it wasn't in her nature to get into competition with her employer as to who could be the most popular but she couldn't help but be happy that her surrogate daughter thought her to be good mother material.

"Even so, you know what'll happen. You run the risk of being cut off from your family. As much as you love Branson, is it really worth it? You must listen to reason my lady"

"Did that ever stop you?"

"W w what?"

"Did reason ever stop you from entering a romance that was technically forbidden and could cost someone their job?" her words were harsh but unintentionally offensive.

"Lady Sybil! I I…" she looked away, defeated, how could she as s hypocrite tell Sybil she couldn't marry Branson when she had secretly married Charles just a few years ago.

"You still call yourself Mrs Hughes. If you cared about reason wouldn't you both have left? And if you didn't care about what people thought, wouldn't you admit to everyone that your name is now Elsie Carson? How can you tell me that I shouldn't do anything silly, when I'm pretty sure you waited a few years to marry, thinking it was a silly idea."

Elsie sat with her mouth hanging open, she'd never thought her entire situation through before but now she did she could see just how irresponsible it all seemed.

"What we did isn't as wrong as what you plan to do"

"They're not that different!"

"They're different enough for me to be able to tell you that marrying Branson, however wonderful it may seem, would be utterly wrong."

"Marriage should be about love - you should know that"

"Yes but we're the same..." she broke off and sucked in her breath.

"Your what, the same class?"

"Yes" she muttered and looked down.

"You know how I hate the class system, that's why Branson and I are so well suited. We have the same opinion"

"Yes but Sybil you have to think how people will react"

"How can you say this to me? Why should it matter what people think as long as you're happy in love, isnt that why you married Mr Carson or is it a secret so you get to keep your jobs"

"I married him because I love him"

"But you thought you'd be sacked if people found out. Servants arent meant to have relationships within the house and you've not only done that but you've got married aswell - as housekeeper you should set an example but no, you've broken the rules too. Now you're trying to tell me what my rules are, you cant think I'm going to accept it from you do you? Yes I may want marry someone who isnt from my class but at least I'm supposed to be marrying at some point, my family want me to marry someone."

"But not a servant!"

"He's going to be a journalist soon, he's getting a job in Ireland if we marry"

"It wont change anything my lady, they wont accept it"

"I couldnt care less. Im marrying him because I love him, like you married Mr Carson - for love, not appropriatness!"

"Is that how you think of my marriage? Inappropriate?"

"No but I wish you would see that you dont need to care what other people think."

"I dont need to, everything is fine as it is" she was speaking shortly, annoyed at being

"Is it? Sneaking around? Though you already spend enough time with each other, I guess people dont notice. But I dont care if people know about myself and Branson, we will marry regardless of what others said. If my family turn me away, so be it, I would have thought, would have hoped that you, as my one true friend, would support me, clearly i have misjudged your character!"

They sat in stunned silence, Sybil, breathing heavily and looking straight at Elsie and she saw a single tear fall down her cheek and into her lap.

"Oh god Mrs Hughes!" Sybil clasped her hands over her mouth, realised the sting of what she'd just said. "I'm so so sorry! Everything is just… Oh I have no excuse, that was just unnecessary"

They were silent for a moment before Elsie spoke,

"It's alright. You're right, I have no right to tell you what to do with your life." She didn't say it sharply, but with meaning.

"No, you're simply doing what's best for me. You're caring about me as you always have done, you've always been here for me, I have grown up under your influence. It's me that doesn't have the right to speak to you like that."

They smiled sadly at each other,

"Anyone would think I'm a bad influence one you." They looked at each other before bursting into laughter.

"Hardly. You've always been the best influence on me I could ever find."

"You flatter me far too much m'girl."

"I speak the truth Mrs Hughes, but don't worry; I will think carefully before I do anything, you taught me that."

"Well I'm glad I taught you something." She winked at her, "I dont want to be the influence on your descison, choose what you feel is right, but do think about the consequences. But never turn your back on who you are, doing things entirely because you have to rather than what your heart wants, I dont want you to turn out like your eldest sister." She smiled sadly and upon heard a door shutting outside her room, she glanced at the clock.

"I'd better get going milady, but you can come and see me anytime. You know that" They both got up and Sybil went to the door.

"Thank you Mrs Hughes, I always appreciate you being here for me, even when I talk to you like I did. I am sorry"

"Don't be milady. You never need apologise to me."

"I should though. Just so you know, I've never thought your marriage to be wrong, in any way. I just wish you'd told people, we could have celebrated. Thank you though, for everything."

"It's no problem" she smiled and squeezed Sybil's arm. Sybil looked at it before hugging her instead. She left and quickly hurried to her room. She had a lot of thinking to do.

I have three new story ideas that I want to begin, unfortunately I have to finish this and Bruises On The Heart before I can start them. I'll do a couple more chapters of this one :) As for Bruises On The Heart, I can't write the final chapter until I hear which ending is desired by the readers, so my new stories need to be put aside until I can get these finished.

I'm sorry if the bit about the similarities between the Carson's marriage and the Branson's marriage are confusing. I've tried to alter it to convey what I meant but please please review :)