Author's Note: FYI, you guys were supposed to get this YESTERDAY- a certain website for fan-based fic had a hissy fit.

Great jumpin' jellybeans, I sure hope this holds up to the hype. . .

Things really came to a head at about 3 a.m. as Sideswipe was completing his patrol shift.

"Ratchet to Sideswipe." The medic sounded irritated as Sideswipe eased his alt-mode around the curve of the road following the perimeter fence.

"Go ahead, Ratchet."

"Your human is awake."

Sideswipe chuckled at the annoyance in the medic's tone and couldn't resist harassing him a bit. "Oh I see. He's my human when he's doing something bad."

"Just get your aft back here." Ratchet growled. "He's pacing around like a caged animal."

Concern blossomed through his circuits. "Pacing?"

"Yes, pacing." Ratchet snapped. "He won't let Epps anywhere near him and he keeps muttering something about supplies."

"I'm on my way. Sideswipe out." Sand sprayed from beneath his tires as he accelerated. Within a minute, he was rolling up to the back of the hangar and transforming. He pulled the back door open and was immediately greeted by Will stomping in his bare feet and marching right underneath him.

Sideswipe tried to turn and see where he was going but without moving his pedes for fear of stepping on the human. As he looked, Will stalked over to the office hangar and yanked open the human door, disappearing inside.

"You let him out!" Epps shot between Sideswipe's feet as well. When he was sure he was clear, Sideswipe turned and hurried after the pair, using the Cybertronian door to let himself in.

Will was moving with surprisingly swift and sure steps, climbing the stairs that led to his own office. Epps had caught up, watching his CO carefully to make sure he didn't fall and give himself that head injury they had been predicting all night.

The colonel turned into his office and fumbled for the lights. Within seconds, there was a flurry of paper flying through the air as Will attacked his desk with his uninjured hand and Sideswipe watched his charge carefully, once again monitoring his vitals. They were slightly elevated, but well within normal ranges. "Seriously, Boss. Maybe you should sit down."

"Get me the cop car."

"Prowl?"

"Yeah, that one."

Sideswipe turned an optic to Epps. At this point, the man seemed at a loss. He simply shrugged helplessly.

Eh, what the hell. This could be fun. Sideswipe activated his com. "Sideswipe to Prowl."

That flat voice came back immediately. "Prowl here."

"Colonel Lennox would like to see you in the office hangar."

Apparently, the earlier encounter between the Praxian and the human had left a lasting impression. When Prowl spoke again, his tone was dripping with disdain "Is it urgent?"

Sideswipe took a certain amount of glee in reminding the bot, "He's a ranking member of the United States Military. If he says it's important, it's important."

"Did he actually say that?"

Sideswipe muted his com. "It's important, right?"

"Kinda."

Close enough. Sideswipe unmuted the com. "It's urgent."

There was an uncertain pause. "I'm on my way."

In the meantime, Sideswipe watched Will continue to search for something, knocking over his inbox and sending highlighters rolling across the floor. He tried asking what the colonel was looking for, but Will just shushed him loudly and continued to rummage.

Within a few minutes, the door opened again and Prowl appeared, moving smoothly up to the catwalk. His optics narrowed suspiciously at Sideswipe who merely gave him a "What?" look back in exchange. He hadn't done anything. Lennox had wanted to talk to him. Never mind that he was off his fraggin' rocker at the moment.

Will stopped fumbling for a second, noticing the white and black mech standing before him. "Okay, Stalker . . . Skulker . . . Creepy. What the hell is your name again?"

Sideswipe tried not to snicker as the tactician crossed his arms. "My designation is 'Prowl'."

"Right, Paul."

"Prowl."

"That's what I said."

"That is not," Prowl replied, with clearly thinning patience, "what you said."

"Don't you get uppity with me, Paul." Will stumbled behind the desk, falling into his chair. "I run this ship."

"We're not on a ship. We're on dry land."

"Exactly."

The incongruous conversation was playing merry hell with Prowl's logic circuits. Sideswipe watched as he offlined his optics, exvented heavily, and proceeded to reset them. He glared at Will as the human rummaged around in the desk drawer, regarding the colonel as though he were something nasty he had just stepped in. "Did you need something?"

"Yes." Will replied. The colonel had come up with a sheet of paper and a pen. It took him three attempts, but he managed to click it and began scrawling on the paper. "We need supplies."

"Supplies?" Sideswipe could tell that Prowl's dubiousness was at war with his sense of duty. He was unfamiliar with this human-creature, but he was a ranking member of their new ally's military force. Perhaps, despite all of the foolishness from earlier, this was an important situation. And although being new to the planet gave him limited experience to draw on, perhaps it was something he could help with.

Sideswipe knew, knew, that was along the lines Prowl was thinking. And allowed the entire situation to play out anyway.

"Here." Will thrust the paper at Prowl. "Priority one. Emergency."

Prowl took the paper with a thumb and forefinger, his optic ridges furrowed as he looked at the frantic writing. "I can't even read this."

"Maybe you should have Ratchet reinstall the language data package."

The Enforcer gave Sideswipe a dead-panned glare as he held the sheet out to him. "I mean, it's the scrawl of a madman."

With a dramatic sigh, Sideswipe took the sheet. Will's handwriting was harsh scratching on his best days and the medication must have been wreaking havoc on his hand-eye coordination. Some of the letters didn't join up and a couple of things were spelled phonetically. But knowing Will as he did, Sideswipe was able to put it together. "Root beer, cheese poofs, salsa, chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, and an order of 'hot wings'."

"What?" Prowl asked in irritated bewilderment.

Sideswipe thought for a second before answering. "If I told you that these materials were vital to the further survival of the planet upon which we stand . . . would you buy that?"

"No."

Epps was no more good after that. The man snorted before breaking into deep, rich laughter. "Prowl, looks like you've been elected for the Colonel's emergency munchie-run."

"What," Prowl was grinding his dente, "is a 'munchie-run'?"

"Um," Sideswipe was having a hard time keeping his faceplates straight, "that would be a mission to procure human food-stuffs to satisfy the carbohydrate cravings usually associated with a euphoric feeling brought on by the ingestion of a controlled substance."

Prowl was positively seething. His optics flared to a brighter blue, boring into Sideswipe. His doorwings formed a sharp "V", apparently out of embarrassment and frustration. His entire body was tense to the point that one of his joint wires was going to snap as he ground out at Sideswipe. "Do you think this is funny?"

"A little bit."

"Hey," Will slurred. He was obviously about to pass out again, leaning back in his chair. Sideswipe noted that Epps had shrewdly put a hand on the back of it to keep him from tipping over. "What part of 'Priority 1' did you miss, Paul? Make with the lights and sirens."

It scared him a little, but Sideswipe could make an educated guess at the colonel's hazy logic. Apparently, since Prowl's alt-mode was an emergency vehicle, he was the perfect candidate for a hasty supply run. Running lights and sirens, he could make it to town in record time. Of course, actually acquiring and purchasing said 'supplies' would be a bit of a challenge for the fifteen-foot-tall robot that really hadn't the faintest idea what these supplies even looked like. Sideswipe decided not to point that out.

Besides, Will had slumped down in his office chair, once more completely oblivious to the world around him. He was actually snoring again.

Prowl stood tall, optics blazing. He took a huge intake of air in through his systems and pushed it out quickly. For a few seconds, Sideswipe wondered if he was simply going to explode as he tried to wrestle with the irritation coursing through his circuits. The plates on his shoulders trembled slightly before he turned on his heel and stalked back across the office bay, slamming the door behind him.

Epps looked up at Sideswipe from beside they're snoring human CO. "He didn't take that well."

"He'll get over it." Sideswipe replied, looking at Will. "How long do you think he can keep these shenanigans up?"

"Don't know." Epps replied, snorting as Lennox snored again. "Sure is making a pain out of himself though. Can you carry him back to the main hangar?"

"I am NOT picking him up again."

"Well, I ain't carrying his butt, either."

In the end, they reached a compromise. Sideswipe reached up and grabbed Will gently, wheelie office chair and all, picking him up and setting him on the floor of the office hangar. Epps had trotted back down the steps and jogged over, grabbing a hold of the back of the chair and dragging it across the floor. Lennox slept on, head tilted back as he snored. Epps shook his head. "Pride of the Ranger corp."

Sideswipe followed them, holding the Cybertronian door open as he went and letting Epps drag their fearless leader's sorry carcass up the sidewalk. He couldn't help but snicker as Epps cussed softly and Will bounced along, totally and blissfully unaware.

As he looked up, he caught sight of Prowl standing near the Junkyard, unnaturally still. Starlight gleamed off his black armor as he stared up into the night.

Sideswipe wasn't sure what made him pause. He wasn't what one would call a deep mech. But pause he did. But there was just something in the way Prowl was holding himself that made Sideswipe pause, refusing to acknowledge the little bit of pity he might be feeling for Prowl. "Hey Epps."

"Yeah?"

"Can you keep an eye on Will for a while longer?"

Epps looked from Sideswipe to Prowl and back. "You realize you wind him up anymore and he's gonna have an aneurysm."

"I know." Sideswipe responded with a smirk. "Can you watch Will?"

"Yeah, I'll watch his crazy ass." Epps looked down at his friend as he mumbled something about chickens. "But I'm putting in for overtime. And he better approve it, too."

"Thanks." Sideswipe watched the two humans disappear into the hangar before moving over to where Prowl stood. "Nice night, huh Paul?"

"This place," Prowl said over his shoulder, "is an undisciplined, insecure, insane asylum."

"Wait until next Tuesday."

"Oh joy." Prowl replied drily. "What's next Tuesday?"

"Bingo night." Sideswipe replied. "This place can get a little wild."

Prowl didn't respond. He went back to staring at the sky.

Prowl really was wound tight. But it wasn't like Sideswipe couldn't understand what the other mech was going through. They had both been exiled from their home planet, just to have that planet destroyed. They had drifted around the galaxy, fighting to survive, trying and not always succeeding to protect the one's they cared for. Pit, they had even both taken up a mantle of guardianship, taking the responsibility of protecting others and vowing to lay down their lives for them if the need ever arose.

Primus, it was annoying to get inside Prowl's processor. Sideswipe could see where he was coming from. And it was leading to a little niggle of remorse at being so impertinent with the tired, frustrated, concerned, probably afraid, but still very annoying mech. Now he was getting irritated again.

He could think of only one way to deal with that. Prowl could probably benefit from it, too.

"Come on."

"What?" There was that flat, annoyed tone again.

"Come on." Sideswipe slid down into his alt-mode and kicked his engine over.

"Where are we going?"

"A wise mech once told me," Sideswipe replied, "that sometimes blowing shit up is the only cure for what ails you."

Prowl seemed ready to protest, but Sideswipe cut him off. "Optimus and the Wreckers are still patrolling. Ratchet will keep an optic on Hound and Bluestreak. Epps will watch Lennox for me. Let's go."

The Enforcer hesitated for another moment before sliding down into his own alt-mode. He had chosen the form of a Dodge Charger. His own engine kicked over, rumbling smoothly.

With a squeal of wheels on the asphalt, Sideswipe flew backwards and whirled away from the Enforcer, spinning his tires as he flew out over the white desert sand. Prowl matched his pace, staying just off his quarter panel. Cueing Prowl, Sideswipe opened a com to Ratchet.

"Ratchet. Go ahead."

"How's Will?"

"Asleep again, for the moment. Epps wants to hog-tie him." Ratchet responded. "Where are you?"

"Prowl and I are taking a drive out to the firing range." Sideswipe's tires sprayed up sand as he maneuvered around boulders and cactus. "Keep an eye on our guests and call us if they need anything.

"Copy that. Ratchet out."

There was only the swooshing sound of their tires in the sand for a few moments before Prowl spoke. "Thank you."

"I wasn't lying when I told you I get it." Sideswipe replied, letting his tires weave across the sand and enjoying the feel of the cool night. "Hell, my charges aren't even the same species. But you save them, you worry about them, and all of the sudden you find yourself realizing there's nothing you wouldn't do to keep them safe."

There was a low hum from Prowl, but he didn't respond. However, when Sideswipe pulled up to the range a few minutes later and transformed, the bot seemed a little less defensive than he had before. "What are we doing here?"

Sideswipe switched his optics to their night settings, suddenly seeing the world in stark blacks, whites, and grays. Down the firing field, he could see the targets. Mostly, they were old bomber planes and some wrecks that the local scrapyards had donated to the cause. With a flick, he rotated his servo out for a small enrgon blaster. "Target practice."

And with that, he shot off a blast, nailing one of the old sedans at the far end of the field. It exploded in a ball of fire, an immensely satisfying result.

Prowl watched for a moment before deploying a rifle from beneath the exoplates on his arm. Instead of sheer brute force, though, he opted precision. As Sideswipe watched, Prowl moved along the targets, nailing logo, hood ornaments, or decals on the planes. He was fast and accurate, firing with quick short bursts and making every shot count.

They took turns for about an hour, firing on the jalopies at the end of the range. Finally, Sideswipe stepped back and checked his weapon before rotating it out for a servo again. He looked at Prowl as the mech did the same. "Not bad."

"You either." Prowl nodded. The mech seemed less tense than he had before. Ironhide had always been right about that. Sometimes a good training session on the firing range was enough to loosen a bot up. It reminded them that they were capable of taking care of themselves and those around them. It distracted the processor, shrinking the world into an unfettered existence where only making the shot mattered. It was therapy.

Shadows were beginning to lengthen around them and Sideswipe realized the sun was coming up. "Check it out, Prowl."

The mech looked up to the east where Sideswipe pointed. The mech stood, watching red and orange paint the sky. Then, the first hint of the glowing orb crested the horizon sending its warmth radiating across the land. There was a look of awe on Prowl's faceplates. "I've never seen anything like that."

Sideswipe remembered the first time he had seen an Earth sunrise. It was a memory file that was permanently pinned in his processor. Cybertron's sun had been a weak and dull thing, just barely holding the metal planet in its gravitational pull. Here, it was vibrant and warm. Life-giving.

He remembered something Sarah had said, not long after Ironhide's death. "There never was night or a problem that could not be defeated by a sunrise or hope."

Prowl shot him a bemused look. "What was that?"

"Eh," Sideswipe shrugged, feeling embarrassed. "Sentimental human crap. You better get used to it."

"Noted."

They drove back in silence, each content with their own thoughts for company. Prowl roared on beside him, seemingly enjoying the drive as much as Sideswipe was. The tense vibes that had been radiating off of him for the last ten hours were significantly less, though Sideswipe highly doubted Prowl was the 'loosen up' type. He was an Enforcer, after all. But he did seem more at peace.

They rolled back into the compound and transformed. The place was still quiet and still, most of the humans still asleep.

Prowl took it in. "I never thought we'd end up. . . well, someplace like this."

"Trust me when I tell you there are worse places." Sideswipe said, keeping his tone light and a bit amused. "It's not Cybertron. But it's not boring either."

Blue optics focused on him. "Are you telling me it's like this every day?"

"Pit, no." Sideswipe shook his helm, "It's usually pretty quiet."

Both bots cringed as vibrant, loud music blared over the intercom. They heard something crash in Ratchet's medbay and Epps giving way to a variety of swear words and yelling Lennox's name. In the distance, a dog barked as ABBA's "Take a Chance on Me" screeched into the early morning. A couple of humans in bathrobes and sleepwear came to their front doors, alternately yawning and yelling.

Sideswipe became aware that Prowl had quirked an optic ridge at him. "Would you care to revise your statement?"

Sideswipe couldn't fight down the grin. "Prowl, my friend, welcome to Earth."

No, I have no clue where Will got a copy of that song. My theory is that Ratchet is a closet Mamma Mia! fan.