Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, because if I did, I wouldn't be spending all of my free time on this FanFiction. *sighs* oh, well.
Author's Note: to certain reviewers that don't like my story because Harry isn't REALLY dark (per say) just remember that the Blood Vow isn't just a physical thing. In a while Harry truly will be Dark, though it's more Dumbledore's fault than Harry's or even Voldemort's. And if you're thinking that Harry's still not really dark cause Voldemort's controlling him, well, how is that really any different from manipulating him into joining. I couldn't have Harry just change his views and join the Death Eaters completely of his own free will because that's just not something I could see him doing. Yes, Harry might leave the light side, but I just can't see him joining the dark side (without some prodding) and ruthlessly killing people he considers friends just because Dumbledore manipulated him. But I can understand where you're coming from. It's your opinion and you're entitled to it.
The summer holiday's passed slowly, and Harry felt as if he wasn't really a part of it. Ever since that night he'd been contacted by Voldemort (because he knew it wasn't just a nightmare) the Order had been . . . distant toward him. It wasn't something most people would notice, but Harry did. Their conversations were always short and a bit awkward. He often caught them glancing at him, only to look quickly away if he looked back.
But what confused and annoyed him the most was Dumbledore's interest in him. It used to be inquiries of his health, or even just friendly chats. Now all Dumbledore seemed interested in was Harry's nightmares and the Blood Vow.
Lupin burst into the room, his wand raised, only to find Harry sitting up in bed with a panicked look in his eyes. His eyes met Lupin's and he seemed to calm down slightly as he took in where he was. Lupin lowered his wand and then returned it to his pocket, seeing that Harry was in no physical danger.
"You alright, Harry?" he asked concernedly. The boy nodded shortly.
"Yeah, just a nightmare." The doubt was clear in his voice.
"About?"
Harry bit his lip.
"Harry, you can tell me." Lupin sat on the bed next to Harry, patting his shoulder a bit awkwardly.
"I betrayed everyone." Harry murmured quietly.
"Why do you say that?" Lupin asked calmly.
And so it began. Harry told Lupin everything, beginning at the Ministry. He explained how Voldemort had possessed him and then how he'd withdrawn when he'd called Harry his Horcrux. Lupin paled slightly at the name. Harry then explained how Dumbledore had tried to Obliviate him and how he'd been taken. He described emotionlessly how Voldemort had bribed him with power and riches. And how he'd taken his frustration out on Malfoy and got tortured for it. The recounting of the time he spent in the cellar was vague but detailed enough to get the point across.
He told Lupin of how he'd broken, trembling now. He insisted that if he'd been stronger he wouldn't have made the Blood Vow (under the influence of the Imperious Curse) and sworn to take the Dark Mark. He recounted his nightmare and was stunned when Lupin said "Alright, let's go see Dumbledore."
"What!"
"Well, he needs to know what happened, Harry. He's left you alone for this long because you need to recover, but this can't wait." Lupin said.
"But . . . I can't go! I don't know how this vow thing works! What if I walk into the room and just go mad?" Harry said frantically.
Lupin looked slightly uncomfortable. "Harry you're fifteen and Dumbledore is one of the most powerful wizards of the century. I honestly don't think he'd have much trouble subduing you."
So Harry warily followed Lupin Dumbledore's office. Dumbledore didn't look in the slightest surprised to see them. Harry explained everything again.
"I know about the vow, Harry." Dumbledore said.
"You do? But then—"
"Why am I allowing you to stay here? Because Harry, you have done nothing wrong. Anyone would break under what you were put through. It's isn't your fault, and I won't punish you for something beyond your control. Plus I can't very well just leave you somewhere for Voldemort to recollect you." Dumbledore said without the usual twinkle in his eye.
"But I'm like a bomb waiting to go off!" Harry argued. Lupin looked lost.
"What's a bomb?"
"It's similar to a trigger spell. You set it to go off at a certain time and it blows things up." Dumbledore explained. "And that hardly matters. What does matter is that Harry is kept away from Voldemort. You may have to take a Dreamless Sleep potion at night, Harry." He said, turning to Harry.
"You want to drug me?"
"For your safety and the safety of others, we may have to." Dumbledore replied.
"For your safety, you mean." Harry growled.
"Harry!" Lupin reproached.
"Harry, don't let him get to you. Don't let his anger overpower you. You are still Harry, not just Voldemort's puppet." Dumbledore said calmly.
Harry's emotions were in turmoil. Part of him wanted to jump up and start smashing things (like Dumbledore's face) and part of him wanted to cry. Dumbledore didn't understand. Voldemort wasn't making him angry. Dumbledore was.
"He's not overpowering me! You manipulated me, you always have! You never tell me anything and yet I have this supposed great destiny. I live with my muggle aunt and uncle who hate me and kept me locked in a cupboard for ten years! You no doubt knew, but you apparently didn't care. I hate you Dumbledore! Just as much as I hate fucking Voldemort! All you do is manipulate me. I told Voldemort I'd rather be your puppet than his, but truthfully I'd rather not be part of this at all. I'm fifteen for bloody hell's sake! I'd walk out on this right now if I could, but I can't. Because you or Voldemort would drag me back into it! But I'm done being a puppet, Dumbledore. If you want me to go fight Voldemort, just bloody tell me! Stop running circles around things and just be straight. If you want my help, tell me what I'm in for!"
"Alright, Harry." Dumbledore said soberly. "You're quite right, I've been treating like a child, and you are growing up. You deserve to know everything."
"Then why don't you start with horcruxes. What are they and why does Voldemort regard me as property now?"
Dumbledore winced. "A horcrux is a piece of dark magic in which a piece of the soul is placed in another object—such as a diary, for instance—that way, hypothetically, if you were killed you wouldn't die. Voldemort made seven Horcruxes. One is the diary you destroyed in the chamber of secrets in your second year. Another is the ring of a relative of his, I destroyed it. And then there's you, Harry. The Horcrux he never meant to make. When your mother died, she used an old magic to protect you. When he gave you that scar and the spall rebounded, it should've killed him. But a piece of his soul latched onto you when the spell rebounded and you became a horcrux."
"But that's only three." Harry said.
"Yes, I haven't found the others yet. I have several theories, but no hard evidence."
"What were you planning on me doing when I was 'ready?'" Harry asked. This was the moment of truth. Literally. Had Voldemort been lying or did Dumbledore want him to kill himself?
"I would have asked you to help me find and destroy the other horcruxes." Dumbledore said simply.
"And then? When we had, what would you want me to do?" Harry persisted.
Dumbledore sighed. "I would have asked you to die for the greater good. So millions of others wouldn't die pointlessly."
The problem was that Harry understood Dumbledore's point. What was his life compared to millions of others? If Voldemort had no more horcruxes, he could be killed. And Harry was a liability.
"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches ... born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies ... and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not ... and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives ... the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies ..."
Neither can live while the other survives.
Harry made his decision . . .
So . . . what do you think? Was it ok? Please review! I got my first negative review *sob* oh, well. I'll live. Is anyone confused? Good. You should be. I purposely didn't express Harry's intentions. Guess you'll have to keep reading to find out . . . and review! Lol. I was gonna make this chapter longer, but it just felt like it should end here. Any guesses as to what is going on in Harry's mind? I'll update ASAP, so probably like tomorrow. Expect around 2-3 updates a week. I don't have practice Fridays this year, yay! Eh, conditioning for swimming is TORTURE! 80 laps! Lol. Until tomorrow, people!
c-h-l-o-e77: thanks, I appreciate it!