Hey there everybody! I'm really sorry about the late posting and all that, but my life has been entirely too hectic for my liking lately, and I'm floundering a bit under everything. Not to fear though, the world seems to have righted itself and everything will even out soon. For now, I hope you enjoy Chapter Four of Need You Now: The End. If you want to listen to the song, it's "The End" (acoustic) by McFly.
Chapter 4: The End
Most people thought Finn was stupid, but he really wasn't. Sure, the way he spoke and what he actually said led people to think so, but he closely observed interactions between people. It was how he knew that Rachel wasn't as in love with him as she claimed.
Tina knew that he knew, but she didn't want to say anything. He was hanging on by a thread as is and she didn't want to do anything to jeopardize his fragile happiness. She had felt her heart break when he had no one after Quinn, it was almost too much for her to bear. Tina had a soft heart, that she knew, but her heart break went deeper than that. She really felt for Finn, and Artie was right about one thing, she wished that Finn would just see her. But even so, that was no reason to not give Artie her everything. She knew it was wrong, but she couldn't give him her whole heart when part of it belonged to Finn.
No one knew, but the main reason she always stuttered and blushed in Glee was because Finn was there and watching her. She was painfully shy because she wanted so much to impress him, it was like a physical ache when she saw him. But he was so wrapped up in Rachel Berry and Quinn Fabray and Santana Lopez that he never spared a glance for the stutter-fly goth girl in Glee.
So when Tina actually found Finn, it wasn't a concerted effort to find him. On the contrary, she was trying so hard to avoid him that she ended up finding him. She had sprinted out the doors of William McKinley, drenched in cherry slushee. She had just taken solace underneath the bleachers when she heard a soft, masculine voice drift down to her from above.
"Kicking off is the hardest part,
Nothing's certain at the start.
Letting go, so something can begin."
Tina really had to strain to hear the grainy lyrics, and it was then she knew that someone was blasting his or her earbuds so loud that she could hear it, not that he or she was actually singing it. She crept up slowly and peeked through the gaps in the steps. She pushed a sticky strand of hair out of her eyes and took in the sight of a letterman jacket and moderately styled coffee brown hair. She let out a small gasp of surprise and retreated backwards into the darkness.
Her heart was beating like a jackhammer inside her chest and wiped her now sweaty palms on her sticky black skirt. She started taking deep breaths, not so loudly as to draw attention to her existence, but just enough to calm herself down. Once she had achieved this, she crept slowly closer again and barely caught the words.
"Everybody knows the end;
When the curtain hits the floor.
Everybody knows the end;
Don't want to get there wishing that you'd given more.
It's not over till it's over,
So how do we begin,
When everybody knows the end?"
She heard Finn sigh sadly and shift above her and Tina felt a tear slide down her sticky cheek. The song was so sad, even if she didn't know why Finn was listening to it. She leaned against one of the pillars beneath the bleachers, listening to the muted words coming from Finn's earbuds and forgetting the rest of the world.
Finn stared out over the football field, which was empty of all people, a rare thing. The music of McFly was blasting from his iPod, and he was willing the words to swallow him whole. He closed his eyes and thought, his brain jumping sporadically from one thing to the next. Finally, the one thing he stopped on was his relationship with Rachel. He didn't really know why they weren't together way before this, but he knew that he really liked her, like loved her status.
Finn was jolted out of his thoughts when he heard the chorus once more and a sad smile broke over his face.
"Everybody knows the end;
When the curtain hits the floor.
And everybody knows the end;
Don't want to get there wishing that you'd given more.
It's not over till it's over,
So how do we begin,
When everybody knows the end?"
Even though he loved her, he knew they weren't going to last. Rachel was just… too good for him. And admitting that, even to himself, was way harder than it should have been. He knew she was in love with someone else, but he was too selfish, too damn selfish, to let her go. They were never meant to be together, simply to coexist. But his question was, if he knew they wouldn't last when they started, so why did he even try at all?
Finn opened his eyes as the song ended. Tears leaked from his eyes unbidden and he quickly wiped them away, looking around sheepishly to make sure no one saw him cry. He calmed as he stayed motionless, looking over the empty football field as the sun set in fiery hues on the horizon. He would never forget Rachel Berry. She was his first love, the first girl that got him to look beyond popularity and superficial beauty to see the beauty inside of people. She helped him to become a better person. And he would be forever grateful to her for that. But he couldn't keep her; she wasn't his to keep. She belonged in New York, taking on the City That Never Sleeps and making her dreams a reality.
He smiled ruefully and exhaled, allowing the ghost of Rachel Berry to leave him behind. No longer would he live in her shadow. It was time to let her go become who she was meant to be. It was time for him to learn to breathe again without her, no matter how much it hurt. And it was time for him to focus on himself and becoming a better man, the type of person who deserves someone great to love him back.
Finn stood up with a small smile on his lips and descended the stairs. He had a really good feeling that he would meet someone soon that would send him on a tailspin. He just knew that she would help him to become the man he was meant to be.
Tina smiled quietly as she tucked a lock of sticky hair behind her ear. Finn had decided to move on without Rachel, she just knew it. And she had a feeling that his life would be looking up.