It's in the Eyes

I Can't Do This

Wishes

I wish I could understand the meaning behind a wish. Why wish for something you can't have? Why want for something so far out of reach? And if you want something so bad, what would you give to make that wish come true? Money? Time? A life?

Two hours in to visiting and Kagome was all but convinced that something was up. Hojo kept glancing at her out of the corner of his eye, like he was scared she'd irriparably mess something up, and whenever they're eyes met she'd get one of those thoughts thoughts like: what does she think shes doing, and, no kagome stupid kagome what are you thinking. It was really starting to get to her because it wasn't just Hojo's eyes that were doing it, and after two hours of only geting the self demeaning thoughts from looking at other people, Kagome was sure it was the eyes that were the cause.

She locked eyes with the only patient who's had a visitor all night

poor thing dont even realize the trouble

and imediately turned away. The things this place was making her think! It was crazy. She looked up and caught Hojo's eyes

if i dont watch her shell screw something up

and growled

she always does

before turning away.

And that sick thought that she'd gotten from nearly every nurse she'd made eye contact with, that, Fresh Meat, enphasis on the fresh part, slithering out like a snake on the meat. It made her think of back when she was first entering highschool, when she'd been eyed like candy by the seniors. Fresh Meat.

"Great," She mumbled, smiling at the patients younger brother

this place gives me the creeps

"I've gone from being meat to being candy." She sent another smile to the brother

hot

before making her way to Hojo.

Hojo kept a foot of distance, ever the buisness man, "Question, Kagome?"

"Yeah," She sighed, "Whens our shift over?"

Hojo turned to her and this time, his eyes shadowed with concern

you have got to be kidding me

that tasted like agrivated bile in the back of her throat. "What's wrong, Kagome? Are you feeling okay?"

"No, Hojo," Kagome snapped, "I'm just feeling a little off right now."

"Alright, Kagome," Hojo soothed, reaching foreward and patting her shoulder, "Alright. We're almost done, just another half hour."

Kagome frowned, looking at her hands. Really, what was she doing? Hojo was super-nice, a real go-getter, a good guy. He was, as her friends were a constant reminder of, a keeper. So what was she doing being snappish at him? "Sorry, it's just-" She looked at him from under a veil of lashes, "I'm tired."

She saw Hojo's eyes soften

really shes adorable

and his hand moved to pat the back of her head. "I know, Kagome, it's fine. It'll be over in another half hour. Can you make it that long?"

maybe i should take her home and come back

Come back? O-oh no. She did not want him to come back and be alone with that Kagura. Somehow she got the worst fresh-meat feeling from her. Kagome shook her head. No, these were not real thoughts. She was under quite a bit of stress, and her head hurt. That was all that it was. A good nap would take care of both of those.

"No, no, Hojo. Don't worry, I can make it." She smiled up at him

gosh i love her

and turned to walk back around. "I'll be fine."

When she returned to the patient, it was with a frown and a head ache.

"Miss?"

Kagome blew out a quick sigh, plastered on a smile and faced the woman who claimed to be the mother of the man she knew only as Patient.

"Yes?"

The woman looked releaved, but her eyes shadowed worry

read the signs please save my son please

as she reached a tentative hand to touch Kagome's arm. "My son, Miss, what medications do they have him on? He-" She huffed out a shaky breath- "Last time I was here, he and I were having full scale conversations, and now," She couldn't finish, but the hand touching Kagome became a vice grip around her arm, "He can't even talk at all!" Her eyes returned to Kagome

not right not right ive got to get him out out out

with a plead she couldn't comprehend.

Kagome swallowed. "I'm sorry, Ma'am." She whispered, "I-I'm just a voluntere. I wouldn't-" She shook her head, "I'm sorry."

The woman sighed and moved back to Kagome's patient, her lips trembling as she sat in the chair beside him. "Miroku," She mumbled, "Miroku, baby, can you hear me?"

Kagome took a moment to examine the patient for the first time, finally tuning in to those around her. He was tall, or he would have been, had he not been plastered to the wheelchair, maybe five-nine, six feet? With brown hair pulled back into a tight pony-tail at the nape of his neck, he looked to Kagome as if he belonged in a different era all together. He wore the standard pale blue hospital robe, covering his torso and legs down to his matching slipper claid feet. From where Kagome stood behind him, she could see his right hand, resting lightly on the arm rest of the chair, blanketed in gauze, running from his fingertips into the sleeves of his robe.

A frown adorning her features, Kagome stepped around the brother, and slowly trailed behind the mother, until his features came into view. The curve of his jaw rounded to pale, thin lips, and a narrow nose. His thick eyebrows pulled down over the rims of his closed eyelids in an expression masked with serious concern. And then he opened his eyes, and Kagome gasped as the violet orbes were revealed and he stared back at her.

help me

The thought sounded so real that Kagome looked around to find it's source. That definately didn't sound like her, Kagome's paniky mind raced, in fact, the thought seemed to match- Her eyes strayed to his again

help me

and her head cocked to the side in confusion. It couldn't be coming from him, could it? No, no, definately not. The thoughts she'd been having all day- those were just her minds way of releaving stress. Nothing more nothing less. But then-

help me

Even-Even if it was coming from him, what on earth could he want help with? Tentatively, Kagome kneeled in front of Miroku, and his mother stratened at his side, "W-what are you doing?"

Kagome glanced at the mom before turning back to Miroku, "Sir?" She tested, his eyes widened in responce, "Sir, if you can hear me, please blink." He blinked.

With a sigh of relief, Kagome sat back on her haunches. "Alright, sir-"

A tap on her shoulders turned her attention to his brother

she has to use his name

"Miroku." He told her, "His name's Miroku."

Kagome nodded. "Alright." She turned back to the patient, "Miroku, then." Another sigh, a pause, two breaths and a heart beat before, "Miroku, could I please ask you a few questions?"

Miroku gave her an odd look

cant speak cant answer

like he thought she was missing something vitaly obvious.

"Let me amend that," She paused, smiled, "I'll ask you only yes or no questions, kay? One blink for yes, two for no. That alright?"

Miroku blinked.

"Alright," She made a sound similar to a hum, "The first ones weird. Is that alright?"

A blink.

Kagome looked into his eyes with a seriousness that was unlike her, and her heart thudded in her chest. "Would you like me to help you with something?"

Miroku's head moved, straitened from it's tilted, lazy angle, his eyes widened, and his mouth opened like he wanted to say something. She let him struggle with his tounge for a moment, and in the end, he gave up and blinked. Just once.

Her own exprecion surprized, Kagome tapped her head with a finger. Don't get your hopes up, girl, she told herself, stress thoughts are one things, talking to people through their heads a completely different angle.

"What would you like me to help with?"

Miroku raised an eyebrow. Cool. She wished she could do that.

"Sorry," She huffed out a humorless laugh. "Is this thing you need help with important?"

A blink.

"Is it dangerous?"

Blink.

"Does it have to do with your condition?"

Blink.

"This hospital?"

Blink.

"Is it-" Kagome was interupted this time by a hand on her head, and when she looked up, it was to see Hojo glaring at her

i knew shed screw up

with his mouth set in a firm line. "Kagome, didn't they say no fraternizing with the patients? This rule is very important and set up for a reason. Don't you know how dangerous crazy people can be?"

(A/N) I really hope I'm writing this right. I'm not pushing Hojo into the bad-guy persona, guys, so don't worry. He will stay in charictore as much as possible and still resonate within the foundations of It's in the Eyes. For those of you who are confused by the thoughts, I thought I'd explain. Not every thought you have is going to match what you do. In Hojo's case, he's acting the part of the sweet-lovable boyfriend, which, of course, he IS sweet and lovable. To a point. But Hojo is to concerned with thinking that Kagome is incompetant and can't do anything right. Once we get more into the story, I'll delve a little deeper into his past to show you his reasons. So just remember, if I write in a thought that really just does NOT match what's happening in the story, there is a reason, and I'll explain it all in the end. :D

Alright, to hit another topic in a review; "I'm assuming the random bold words are thoughts and that sometime during the story Kagome began to hear them."

You are very right. The bold parts are thoughts, and at a seemingly random point in time, Kagome started hearing them. But if you re-read that first chapter, you'll understand. Kagome hears your thoughts when she looks into your eyes. Until I wrote in the first eye contact she'd had with Hojo in the first chapter, Kagome hadn't heard thoughts that didn't belong to herself. And now that she's in EVERYBODIES head, it's kinda giving her a little trouble. Give it a couple more chapters, and I'll explain exactly WHAT gave her the power to read thoughts that way on that RANDOM day. Because, in a story, absolutely NOTHING is random.

:D thank y'all for your reviews and this story is brought to you by Rumiko Takahashi's Inuyasha and Melinda Metz's Fingerprints series.