Title: Behind Closed Door
Chapter 10
Word Count:1437

Rating: M!

Pairings: Eventual James/Carlos, with undertones of Kendall/Logan.

Disclaimer: Of course I don't own Big Time Rush!

Warnings:Abuse, implied rape, self-harm
Summary: AU His friends only saw the happy, peppy, playfully crazy him. They never saw the broken, pained, dying him. He wouldn't, couldn't let them. They couldn't know what happened behind closed doors.
Author's Note: I'm a terrible person… I seriously have no idea what to do with My Own Murderer and refuse to update it until I do, so that I don't post some crap chapter. SO yeah, that could be a while… Sorry :'(

Anyway, while I wait for inspiration on that chapter, you'll be getting more updates on this! YAY!

Here.

DallieJLovesBTR

Monday morning came much too slowly for all four boys.

Kendall and Logan never went to see James. They spent the day entangled in each other's arms, watching movies and doing, ehhem, other physical activities. They knew they would just see him the following morning, they could talk to him then.

James found his notebook and texted Carlos, telling him to show up the next morning at school for they had to talk. He couldn't take his eyes of off the five words etched in stone on paper. He couldn't believe it was true and he had to hear it. He couldn't wait to see Carlos, his one true love.

Carlos, after receiving James' text, waited anxiously for the next morning. He didn't sleep, not that he ever did anyway, but he just couldn't wait to see James the next day. He knew he'd get weird looks, for showing up like he ever so rarely did. But it'd be worth it, he could only hope.

Carlos slung his backpack over his shoulder, much more chipper than he had been in days. He still didn't dare touch his helmet; he didn't feel safe in it, if anything, he felt even more unsafe. Mateo eyed him suspiciously all morning, the sudden change in mood clearly confusing the taller of the two. But he didn't question it, to Carlos' relief. The walk to the school was filled with a comfortable silence, and the boys shared a slight nod before heading their separate ways.

What happened next, Carlos would have never expected.

Carlos walked to his locker withh his head held high to his locker. All of his friends still grouped around there. The first person he saw was James, talking to Kendall and Logan while glancing around and, as Carlos knew, looking for him. When the two of them locked eyes, there was a flash of emotion that passed through James' eyes before he pushed through the pair in front of him and ran to Carlos. Carlos dropped his backpack to the floor moments before strong arms engulfed him and soft lips grabbed his in a passionate tangle of mouth and tongue. There was no one but them. They needed no one else.

Behind them, everyone watched in shock. Kendall smiled and grabbed Logan's hand, for the first time not worrying about what people would say. The captain of the hockey team leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on the lips of his left wing. They smiled at each other and looked back at the scene in front of them. Everyone was gasping, gossiping, freaking out, some in a good way, some in a bad way. But they couldn't be happier.

James pulled his face away from the smaller, smiling and putting his forehead against Carlos'. "I love you more than life, Carlitos." He said, loud enough for anyone within ten feet of them to hear. It earned some more gasping and whispers. He reluctantly pulled apart from Carlos and faced the crowd. He grabbed Carlos' hand and held it high. "Yes, everyone, we're gay. And proud, as you can clearly see. I could never be shameful of being in love with this amazing Latino by my side. And all of you can screw yourself if you have an issue. And if you don't have a problem, you rock." There was a moment of silence before quiet clapping began. It didn't grow much louder, but it was appreciated either way.

James smiled at them all and picked up Carlos' bag, he left his by the locker, and pulled him from the crowded entry way. He pulled him all the way to his car. He pushed him up against the car and kissed his lips once again. Carlos grabbed a fist full of James' hair and tugged slightly. If had been anyone else, James would have been furious, but he just loved being near Carlos. "Let's go to my house," He whispered into Carlos' mouth. Carlos nodded and ran around to the other side of the car, anxious to be anywhere but his house.

At the end of nearly three weeks, Carlos never wanted to leave James' house. He got fresh cooked meals, cooked by someone other than him. He wasn't getting hit every night. He hadn't been… Touched inappropriately. That is, without his permission first. He had only cut twice since he had been there. He hadn't known any other life than the one he had had with Mr. Garcia and now he knew there was something better. The only problem he could see with this was that he hadn't seen Mateo since Tuesday, but he figured he was just getting high somewhere, until two weeks later, on a Friday night, at dinner, of course.

Carlos hadn't been expecting it, how could he have been? Roberto Garcia hadn't looked at, let alone touched, his younger son since Carlos gave everything up to protect him. But it became a cruel reality when he got that picture.

They had just finished the salad James' mom had made for them, and were waiting for to bring out the ribs she had ordered for that day. Carlos felt his phone vibrate and pulled his hand from James. He flipped it open, noticing the small little envelope with a camera next to it from an unknown number. He frowned slightly and clicked enter. He had to close his eyes and blink a few times before he knew what he was seeing was real.

Beneath the words Where you been, son? With your fag boyfriend? Guess what… He's next if you're not back was a picture of Mateo laid out on the floor of the living room, nothing but boxer shorts on. He was staring defiantly up at the camera, with what looked like fearful eyes and tear streaked cheeks. Carlos couldn't believe what he was seeing. His arms looked like they had sleeves on, dark purple sleeves with hints of green, blue and black. There were bruises all up and down his legs and chest, clear finger marks could be seen, even through the bad quality of the picture.

Carlos choked back his own tears, and jumped out of his seat. James shot up right after him. "Carlos?" He asked, frightened by the way his boyfriend was acting all of a sudden. Carlos shook his head, mumbling a quiet chorus of 'no, no, no,' under his breath. James stared nervously at Carlos and reached for his love's phone. He stared down at it for moments before looking back up at Carlos. "Carlos, don't leave."

James frowned when he saw, in Carlos' eyes, that he had already decided. "I have to James. He'll seriously hurt you. I can never let that happen." He began his rise up the stairs, to grab the few things he had.

James grabbed his hand and stopped him for a moment. "We could get Mateo out of there. Then no one would get hurt." He said, optimistically. He frowned when Carlos pulled away and ran to the room he had been in.

Carlos was throwing things into a bag, and as he bustled around, he talked. "No, James, you're wrong. The second we get Mateo out of there, is the second he starts looking for us. All of us. I can't risk him hurting Mateo anymore, or him hurting you at all. I wouldn't be able to live with myself. He's capable of horrible things and he has no conscience. If I stay here, you're not safe. You get it?" He pushed passed James, who had been stood in the doorway and ran down the stairs.

James tried convincing him again at the door, grabbing his hand and pulling him back in multiple times, but for someone so weak, Carlos was too strong for even James to handle. He let tears fall as he went up and placed a gentle kiss on James cheek, where you could see tears beginning to leave streaks. "I'm so sorry," Carlos whispered. He turned and ran away from the house as quick as he could.

James stared longingly after him, shutting the door once Carlos had left his view. He leaned against the door and closed his eyes, with the Mateo had looked, he had to say a quiet prayer.

"God, I know I don't talk to you much, but I need you to do something for me… Please, please oh Lord, do not make those the last words I ever hear out of that beautiful mouth of his." James fell to the floor in a heap, not able to hold himself up any longer, and sobbed.

I feel like that was okay. But anyway, yeah, I wasn't really busy this past weekend and Monday is usually my only free day, so yay. You got three updates in one weekend, but the rest of the month, I will be really busy so don't expect much more until November. Sorry.

But yeah, don't forget to review Lovelies. Thanks for reading!:)

Love you all,

Dallie