Chapter 2:
It was dark.
Why was it dark?
Oh, he'd fallen asleep.
Sitting up quickly, Thor looked around and found himself still in his quarters. He hadn't meant to fall asleep but he'd been exhausted from the battle on Midgard. He'd been putting off rest but it had finally caught up with him – but now that was over and done with and he had things to deal with.
Flinging aside his bed linen, Thor stood up and stalked across his room and out the door. He looked to the left – nothing there – and then to the right – also nothing – before marching off towards his parents quarters. He found them empty and knew that his parents were likely still with Loki. Going by what his friends had said, that Loki had been tortured, he decided to head to the Healing Chambers to see if he could find them there.
The walk was silent and all that could be heard were his thunderous footsteps, so it was no surprise to the guards standing outside the Healing Chambers that their prince had showed up in the middle of the night.
"Step aside, I wish to speak with my parents," Thor said in a gruff voice, stepping forward. He was stopped and the guards crossed their spears to keep him from opening the door. "How dare you! Step aside right now!"
"King Odin has forbidden entrance. Please stand back."
Clenching his fist, Thor narrowed his eyes at the two. "I am not in the mood for this nonsense. Move, or I will move you."
The guards stood their ground, even when electricity began to sizzle around Thor's fists. But he had not the chance to put them in their places because all of a sudden the doors swung open and out stepped Odin.
"Enough," Odin said in a quiet voice, his lone eye giving a very strict look towards his son. "Do you feel yourself above following my orders?"
"Father, I just wished to speak with you," Thor said, peering behind his father. The door was swinging open and shut and in that moment he could make out just a naked figure on a table and a soft blue glow. But the door shut and he turned his attention to his father. "Tell me what you are doing."
Odin let out a short breath; he didn't have time for this right now. But Thor was stubborn and would continue to harass the guards until he got what he wanted.
"Walk with me," He said finally, brushing past his son with a steady pace.
Thor hurried after him, making no effort to keep quiet.
"Have you locked Loki in the dungeons yet?" He demanded as he walked next to his father. "I understand that he is wounded, but I didn't even hurt him that bad."
Odin scoffed.
Loki had been covered in fresh blood and bruises that continued to form hours after he had been brought home. There was a crack in his skull and nearly every one of his ribs had been broken. But sure, Thor had gone easy on him.
"Loki is not in the dungeon and nor do I plan on locking him up," Odin said eventually, ignoring Thor's noise of indignation. "He is to remain in the Healing Chambers while your mother and I work with Lady Eir to heal him."
"Please," Thor snorted, rolling his eyes. "He had worse injuries the time he was attacked by a pack of bilgesnipe."
Odin stopped and turned to look at him. "There are more than just physical wounds. Did you not sense them yourself? You were the only handling him, after all."
"The only sense that I see is that of this utter nonsense of whatever he is trying to pull," Thor replied, folding his arms across his chest. "I don't care what happened to Loki. He turned against everything he swore to as a prince of Asgard. He attacked one of the planets that he swore to protect. Any wound he has is nothing compared to the death and destruction he caused on Midgard!"
"There is much more to that than what you saw happen!" Odin bellowed at him. "As always you do not see!"
"See what?" Thor demanded angrily.
Odin shut his mouth and stared at his eldest son. How – how – were they having this conversation again? How many times had he been in his situation? How in the nine realms did Thor make it this far in life being as ignorant and blind as he was? Clearly he had failed at being both a good father and a good king. One son was lost to madness and the other a fool. Where had he gone wrong?
Taking a deep breath, Odin closed his eyes and took a moment to collect himself before speaking.
"If you interrupt what I'm about to say to you, I will banish you to Helheim for eternity," He said in a low voice that meant business. "If you do not understand by the end of this, then there is nothing more I can do to help you."
Thor stared him in the eye and waited for him to explain. Little did he know what was in store for him.
"When I found Loki after the battle on Jotunheim, I assumed that he had been left to die. He was small for a Jotun. Small, and tiny, and fragile. He was a runt without a doubt and Laufey would never claim him. Perhaps it would have been kinder to leave him to die, but I couldn't turn my back. After all that death and destruction I reigned on Jotunheim, I couldn't turn my back on a mere babe."
Thor shifted uncomfortably but said nothing.
"I didn't realize how wrong I was until Loki was just a tot. He began to show signs of magic much earlier than most children. He caused quite a bit of harmless chaos, but nothing I worried about. But then one day during a peace meeting with Laufey, Loki toddled into the room and that's when I learned the truth. Laufey recognized him instantly and without warning tried to kill him. I put a stop to it, of course, but Laufey was furious. He called me a fool for taking the abandoned babe – he hadn't left Loki to die for being a runt, Loki was left to die because the magic he holds is more powerful than anything anyone could ever imagine, and that if his power ever got out of his control, it would be the end of everything. He left Loki to die because Loki was too much of a threat.
Of course, I refused to do such a thing. Loki was my child, my precious son. I would let no harm come to him. But Laufey was persistent and so I put an end to the peace treaty and banished him back to Jotunheim with the promise of destruction should any Jotuns step foot in Asgard again."
Odin paused and closed his eyes. He was almost too ashamed to admit this part, but there also no denying that it had happened.
"Your mother and I kept a close eye on Loki after that. As he grew up, we thought it best to keep him from using his magic more than was necessary. I regret it, now realizing that Loki was miserable and suffered through the years believing that I was ashamed of him."
He blamed himself for everything. Loki had always been so in touch with the world around him. He should have spent more time with him, teaching him how to use and control every bit of magic that he had in him. But then there was the rebel outcry on Anaheim, and the Great Drought in the southern colonies. One thing led to another and his time with Loki had abruptly come to an end.
"I had never been able to put a seal on Loki's powers. As he got older his magic increased and he didn't know how to control it and it begun to explode. We told him when he was ten that he was too old for a nanny; in reality, he had caused her death. The fire in the old library that killed three scholars wasn't caused by rebels; it was because of Loki. The older he got the more gruesome the incidents became and Loki began to realize how much power he had in him and thus shut himself away from everything and everyone in attempt to keep them safe."
Eleven.
Loki had only been a boy of eleven.
He was nothing more than a child and had seen such darkness, felt such hatred towards himself.
He was a boy.
Odin sighed; how had he ever been allowed to become a parent?
"For years I watched from afar as you and your friends ridiculed him for being an outcast, when in reality he wanted nothing more than to be with you. I stood in silence as you treated Loki as if he could be tossed aside, and he looked up to you. And all the while, I couldn't say anything to you because Loki had forbade us from speaking of his power."
Thor opened his mouth to defend himself – Loki had put himself in those situations and was as much to blame as he was – but shut it knowing that Odin would smite him for interrupting.
"It took a toll on his mental health. Humans, Jotuns, Asgardians…it doesn't matter who. No one is meant to live in such solitude and loneliness. Finding out that he was adopted was just the cherry on top of the cake and what finally pushed him over the edge."
The edge of Odin's mouth twitch. What a horrible choice of words…Loki would have been amused.
"So Loki let go," He continued in a quiet voice, sadness clear in his eye. "It was too much for him. Death was the blissful peace in which is sought, but that's where things went wrong."
"He fell to the Chitauri," Thor piped in, and Odin nodded.
"He fell to the Chitauri," Odin agreed solemnly. "And they tortured him beyond anything legal in the Nine Realms. They required his obedience and torture was their method."
Thor made a face and swore.
"I find that hard to believe. If Loki is so powerful why would he let himself get put in such a situation?"
Odin sighed, giving him an annoyed look.
"Falling through the void is not something that I can explain to you. Loki fell and death did not greet him. What he did was brave and powerful and is to be commended. He locked himself inside his mind and so only physical pain remained and that's what made it so easy for the Chitauri to torture him into obedience."
Thor narrowed his eyes but said nothing.
"When Heimdall found that Loki had shown up on Midgard I was prepared to go and retrieve him myself but…when we realized that he was being controlled by the Chitauri, the truth became clear to us: Thanos."
"The Mad Titan?" Thor said skeptically.
"Aye. The Chitauri controlled Loki, but Thanos controlled the Chitauri. He was just using Loki as a puppet, with the intent to kill him once everything was finished, but if he had ever discovered the unlimited power he had in his hands from your brother, nothing could stop him from getting what he wants. We had to act quickly and bring Loki back to Asgard, to save himself and everything in existence. There was very little time to prepare and so I sent you to retrieve him and thus here we are."
Odin finished his speech and there was a long silence between them. He studied Thor, watching how his son took this all in. Now that the truth was out in the open they could all just focus all their time and energy helping Loki come back from all this.
But in the end, Thor proved to be the same naïve, thoughtless prince that he had always been and apparently would always be.
"There are no excuses for what Loki has done," Thor said eventually, shaking his head in disbelief. His parents had always been soft on his brother and now look what happened. "He is responsible for his own actions regardless of the torture he endured. It is shameful to call himself an Asgardian and allow himself to be pulled around like a puppet. Perhaps its because he isn't Asgardian that he remains to be after all this time weak and a useless warrior. In the end he proves to be nothing more than the Frost Giant he was born as."
"Only a fool would use a childish slur as an adult," Odin spat angrily, taking a step towards his son. "Loki has shown strength that you will never understand."
"He is weak," Thor repeated, refusing to back down. "What strength do you speak of? His magic tricks? The only reason he was allowed to become a warrior was because of his title of prince. He has never won a physical fight of brute strength against me."
"There is more to power than just physical strength!" Odin roared at his son. "If you have yet to comprehend this at your age, I have little faith that you'll ever be worthy of being a king! Physical power and magic go hand in hand and every living thing has even just the slightest bit of magic in them. Where do you think your lightning comes from? Do you pull it out of thin air with brute strength? No! You use magic!"
Thor flinched and took a step back.
Odin stared at him in utter disappointment and shook his head.
Where did I go wrong?
"And still the mighty Thor is too full of himself to realize the most basic knowledge of life. You are an arrogant little man and I'm ashamed to be your father," Odin whispered, closing his eye.
Thor stumbled back in shock, unable to defend himself.
"Banishment did not work for you, but you will learn…and pain and suffering will be your teacher!"
Odin raised his hands, summoning his magic. He reached forward and pushed Thor against the wall and held him there with his hands on his chest.
"Thor Odinson, I put you in the Sleep. From the very first breath he took until this very moment, you will experience your brothers life through his eyes, and you shall not wake until you do!"
He leaned forward and whispered into Thor's ear.
"It's time for you to grow up."
With all his might, he forced the spell of Sleep upon his son and then stepped away, letting Thor fall to the ground unconscious. Without batting an eye, he turned and walked away without a second thought.
The walk back to the healing chambers seemed longer than when he had left; he was exhausted but Loki needed him more than he needed to rest. He was prepared to do whatever it took to get the darkness out of Loki and bring his mind back to reality, even if it meant pushing himself towards another Odinsleep.
"Odin!"
Odin looked up, realizing he had reached his destination. He went to Frigga's side and took her hand into his own.
"What did I miss?" He grunted, noticing the worried looks on her and Eir's faces.
Lady Eir let out a sigh and gestured towards the room where Loki laid naked in the bed while three of her healers kept a glow of blue magic surrounding him to heal his deep wounds.
"The Chitauri lock on his mind remains strong. It is beyond my power and knowledge to remove it. I worry that if I continue to pry, I might cause more damage," Eir informed the king. She was disappointed in herself for not being able to handle this, but more disappointed that her former student and young prince was stuck and suffering on his own.
"Let us stop for the night," Odin said, unable to look away from his son. He closed his eye and paused for a long moment. "I will take him to the Chamber of Solace."
Frigga frowned and placed her hand on his shoulder.
"My love, are you sure?" She asked lightly. "Will he be safe there…from himself?"
"It is a place of timeless suspension," Eir reminded her gently. "Loki will be able to simply exist. It will give his body time to heal and his mind to be at peace."
"It is the safest place for him until we can find some answers," Odin replied with a nod. He leaned down and kissed his wife on the cheek.
Walking into the other room, Odin put his hand up to let the healers know that it was alright to stop what they were doing. He waited until they had left the healing chambers before gently scooping up his son into his arms, careful to mind his broken ribs, and made his way back to his wife. Frigga was instantly at his side and brushed the black hair out of her son's face.
"My son, I love you more than you will ever know," She whispered to him, kissing his hand.
Odin let her have her moment and waited patiently until she moved away. They locked eyes and she gave him a small nod.
"Let us go," She whispered and moved to hold open the door for her husband.
They walked in silence towards their quarters, where the entrance to the Chamber of Solace was located. He knew it was selfish of himself but Odin wished he could just continue to hold his son, just like when Loki was a young boy. If only he had held onto him longer, perhaps none of this would have happened.
When they reached the entrance, Frigga gave Loki one last kiss and took a step back and watched as her husband and son disappeared into the clouds of purity.
Odin instantly felt weightless surrounded by soft clouds of white and the sweet whispers of silence where nothing could reach them. He let go of his son and Loki floated in place, his eyes closed and a look of peace on his face. Tucking a strand of black hair behind Loki's ear, Odin pressed two fingers against his son's forehead and closed his eyes.
I am here, my son. Be at peace and know that I will protect you.
He left a drop of his magic to send the message. Loki may be locked up in his own mind, but Odin would be damned if he let him think that he was still all alone.