The flames finally caught. Alexander stared at them dully. Lost, everything lost. All those years for nothing. It had been within his reach-victory, his home, his Daniel-he had almost had had it all. How had it all gone wrong? He raked a hand through his hair.

A small sound drew his attention to the other room. Daniel-his Daniel no longer-was rummaging around. Curiosity got the better of him and he stood, wondering what was occupying his lost lover.

Daniel was undressing, fascinated by his reflection. He would strip off one article of clothing and then pause, savoring what had been exposed, running his fingers over his skin, exploring his new flesh.

Alexander's breath caught in his throat. It was a beautiful scene. He often had imagined Daniel undressing like this for him, slow and teasing, every gesture an invitation. All the young man needed to do was turn and smile at him and everything would be right again… But he didn't. Alexander felt the rage in himself kindle. He would not be defeated, not entirely. He refused to leave Brennenberg empty handed.

Daniel grumbled and curled up deeper in the nest of blankets Alexander had arranged around him. Alexander was insufferably pleased with himself. He spent the whole morning, or what was left of it after he finally stirred himself and worked up the energy to tear himself away from Daniel, humming to himself as he moved about the small house. Daniel could barely move, the slightest fidget awakening pain in muscles he had never known he had had. He supposed some of it was due to his misadventures in Castle Brennenberg, but he chalked up a good share of his misery to the indignities that Alexander had visited upon his person after their escape.

He felt a small mental pinch and winced. He forgot that Alexander could now hear his every thought, a side effect of what had transpired last night. He wondered if this permanent link between their minds went both ways. He reached out, albeit a bit shakily, for Alexander…and was harshly slapped away. He hissed and curled up into a tighter ball, now sporting a headache along with his other wounds.

"Behave yourself, Daniel." Alexander called from the main room.

"It's not fair." Daniel called back.

Footsteps across the rickety floorboards and Alexander poked his head into the bedroom. "What is, my love?"

"That not only can you now violate my body when you desire, but my very mind as well. Am I allowed to have nothing to myself?"

"Not until I know you will not behave foolishly."

Daniel propped himself up on one elbow, wincing at the agony it caused. "And I'm not allowed to touch your mind, even though you can walk into my head anytime you desire?"

"Once you learn how to properly do it. You're very new at this, love, and therefore quite clumsy." He fully entered the room, walking over to where Daniel huddled in the bed they had shared last night. Daniel flinched away from him. "You inadvertently hurt me when you try to establish contact." He reached out and stroked Daniel's hair. "We will have to practice." There was a faint smile on his lips; Daniel realized it was fond and grimaced. "I will admit it has been a very long time since the days when I was taught the rudimentary basics and etiquette, but I dare say we will muddle through."

"And what if I do not want your lessons? I am already, according to you, inhuman enough without…encouraging these unholy talents."

Alexander laughed. "There is nothing unholy about them." His smile turned wicked and something akin to a caress stroked through Daniel's mind, tangling in everything that sent pleasure throughout his body and tugging. He moaned and stretched up into those sensations. Alexander withdrew, the smile now a smirk, and Daniel glared at him. "Are you hungry?" The finger on his temple trailed down his unshaven cheek and gently tilted his head up.

Daniel jerked away and pulled the covers up over his head.

Answer me, love. That damned voice, compelling him to obey.

"Yes. I am."

The covers were snatched back. "I will see to our breakfast then. But first, if you would be so kind as to indulge me for a few moments…" He had one knee on the bed and Daniel realized with horror that he meant to lie down beside him.

He drew back. "Alexander, I can't! You used me horribly and I hurt. if I have to go through that again, I will-"

Hush. The command cut through his rising panic and held him still as Alexander slid in beside him and took him into his arms. "I just wanted to hold you for a bit. Kiss you if you can stand my impure touch." Sarcasm dripped from his words but the thoughts that reached out and laced through Daniel's vibrated with hurt…and a good deal of worry.

"Afraid that you will break your toy again?" Daniel turned at the last moment so Alexander's lips grazed only his cheek.

"Do not be unkind to me." A tightening in the strands of mind that wasn't quite pain, but almost. Daniel, defeated for the moment, let himself relax as much as was possible in Alexander's embrace.

"Did you truly not enjoy last night at all? Even a little?" His lips brushed Daniel's ear when he spoke and Daniel could not suppress a shiver.

There was no emotion in his voice, but again his mind betrayed him. Daniel realized that the only reason he was able to read into the former baron this much was because he was being allowed to. It was…galling.

"No. I told you, it hurt."

"I thought maybe towards the end…"

In truth Daniel could not remember much of the hours after they had found this abandoned settlement and when he had awoken this morning. He had no clear memory of events, but the sensations lingered, vivid and gruesome. There might have been the ghost of pleasure in there somewhere, but if so, it was buried under the chaotic swirl of terror and agony and that gut-wrenching sense of violation as his mind had been shredded apart and then rebuilt.

Alexander gently gathered his thoughts to himself. "I will just…I will leave you to compose yourself and will prepare our breakfast." He slipped out of bed and out the door.

Daniel rolled over and shut his eyes, throwing the thought at Alexander's retreating back that he would love to have another draught of Damascus Rose.

His stomach growled and Daniel realized that his self-appointed lover had been gone a long time. Daniel wondered if he had driven him off, but also knew that his luck did not seem to be that good. He made himself straighten out, wincing as his body protested, and gingerly rose from the bed. After hunting through the wardrobe, he found a shirt that must have belonged to a strapping brute and slipped it on. He did not think he could bear trousers at the moment and would make do with just it. It's not like Alexander would let him preserve his modesty for long at any rate.

He stepped out into the courtyard and winced, the sunlight piercing through his very skull. He shaded his eyes with a hand and scanned the sparse surroundings. Nothing. No trace of Alexander, no trace of even the damn pigs from last night. Maybe he really had been abandoned. If so, how was he ever to reach civilization on his own? He remembered the town of Altstadt dimly, but had no idea where it lay in regards to his current location.

The image of the barn rose up in his mind's eye and he sighed, making his unsteady way to the dilapidated building. "So you're in here then?" He called out as he approached a sizable gap between two boards in the wall. He supposed it was meant to be the door of the establishment. He hesitated at the darkness inside, a reaction that was as instinctive to his nature as his heartbeat it seemed. He wondered what had happened to him to make him fear it so? He had the sense it was a terror that had lived in him well before the Shadow.

A small tug in his mind. He took a deep breath and entered, pausing just inside to let his eyes adjust to the gloom.

Alexander was crouched down on the floor, a knife, point driven into the floorboards, in one hand. There was a bucket before him filled to the brim with some dark liquid. Still being filled, he corrected, following the steady stream of it upwards. It was falling from… Daniel saw what was suspended from the rafters. His legs gave out on him and he spilled to the floor, knees and hands striking hard as he caught himself, body screaming at the rattling jar it caused. He was retching, nothing in his stomach to bring up, but that seemed to not be a concern. He was shaking and his thoughts were helter-skelter, breath growing more rapid as he couldn't seem to draw in enough air.

Alexander was on his knees beside him in an instant, hands smoothing back his hair, voice gentle and his mind wrapping around him, dulling everything in a soothing cloud. Daniel practically threw himself into the fiend's arms, sobbing, chest afire.

"Love, calm yourself. Whatever is the matter?"

"How could you do that? How can you keep doing things like that? You're a monster. A monster."

"Daniel, it's breakfast. It was only a swine."

And it had been only a pig, but for a moment memories of other things strung up for the slaughter had superimposed over it.

Daniel pushed him away, or tired to. Alexander had a firm grip on him and no intention of letting go. He took a breath, tried to talk and realized he could not get his voice steady enough for speech. Please, let me go. I need to get out of here, he pleaded.

Alexander winced. Too loud. A small tweak in Daniel's head to chastise, but he seemed to acquiesce to Daniel's wishes. An arm was around Daniel's shoulders and trying to help him rise, but Daniel's legs seemed to not want to obey him. Alexander growled something when it was obvious that keeping hold of Daniel would result in both of them falling to the ground, so without giving Daniel time to react, he scooped the man up in his arms and hurried out into the sunlight.

Halfway to the house it occurred to Daniel that he should protest being carried like a new bride. Aren't you, though? He smacked Alexander on the shoulder and began to squirm. "Let me carry you. Bear with it until we are inside the house-"

"No! Please. Put me here. Let me stay in the sunlight!"

Alexander paused. Daniel felt the tension in the arms that held him. It wasn't due to the strain of carrying him, the man's strength was preternatural. He reached out for the other man's mind and ran into a blank wall. "Please." He whispered, placing a hand on Alexander's face, trying to convey through that small touch how much he needed this.

Silently, Alexander turned and walked towards the lone tree the yard held. He placed Daniel down so his back could rest against it. Daniel murmured his thanks and closed his eyes, tried to erase the memories that kept bubbling up to the surface. If only he could remember something pleasant to banish them with! But the only things he could recall from his former life were of pain, betrayal and being hunted.

A rustle of fabric and he felt Alexander lean against him, shoulder resting against his, outstretched leg pressed against his own. "Do you have an aversion to trousers?" He asked one finger trailing over Daniel's exposed thigh.

Daniel hurriedly pulled the shirt down as far as he could and moved away from Alexander. The bastard was grinning at him. "I-" Admitting that he was sore would probably not help the situation. "I could not find any that would fit me."

"I see." He tugged on the hem, easing it up slightly until Daniel slapped his hand away. "As I recall, you seemed to not like them…before either. Traipsing through the chill halls in nothing but a nightgown at all hours of the day and night, as if you were a character from one of your Byron's works."

"And I'm sure you complained and were offended by my lack of modesty." Daniel could feel his cheeks heat and cursed how easily he seemed to blush.

"I found it refreshing. And, as I alluded to last night, looking at you is my sole enjoyment in this world." He turned towards Daniel, his hand resting on his bare thigh, thumb just under the bottom of the shirt. Daniel tried to move away from the invasive touch, but was stopped by an arm around his shoulders drawing him back. "All better now?" Alexander asked, nuzzling the fine hairs on his temple.

Daniel was about to angrily retort that being molested was not better than anything he could think of when he realized what Alexander was asking about. His thoughts were calm again, the horrors from this life and his previous one once more submerged and asleep in their depths. Sly old fox. He nodded. "Thank you. For distracting me." He put a hand over the one that was slowly creeping further up his leg. "You may stop now."

"May I have another chance?"

"At what?" Daniel turned his head, forgetting how close Alexander already was. Their noses brushed.

"At last night." His thumb was rubbing little half circles alarming close to Daniel's pelvic bone. "It can be better. I can erase last night's memories with the pleasure I can give you now. Let me try."

"No." Daniel said, exasperated.

"Let me make love to you under the sun. It-"

"If I had my way you would never touch me again." His elbow met the former baron's ribs. He was surprised that Alexander let him go, only sat and watched as he crawled away out of arm's reach. "Go back to carving up your swine, Alexander. It seems to be another pastime you enjoy, the slaughtering of innocent creatures."

"Do not be ugly." The voice was quiet, but the emotions that bled out from the words, that Daniel's brain could now interpret, were threatening.

"I- I'm just- Please. Give me some time alone."

"Very well. I will finish with our breakfast. Call out to me," he gestured to his temple. "if you need me." Please need me. It was small and ever so faint, that last thought. Daniel realized that he was not meant to have been privy to it.

"I will."

Alexander took a few steps away from him and stopped. With his back turned to Daniel, he asked, "Will you ever forgive me?"

"No. Not ever."

There was no rebuke from Alexander, no cutting remark. He just walked away, looking like a man defeated. Daniel would not let himself feel sorry for him. He would not let a smidgeon of pity for that monster live in his heart. He let himself fall back into the grass, sprawling in the sunlight, trying to let the warmth burn away every trace of impurity, every shadow in him. He had promised Alexander last night that he would hate him for eternity. It was a promise he intended to keep…

It had been a short race. Daniel was hurt and exhausted and Alexander had everything to lose. The shirt ripped as Daniel fell, Alexander's fist wrapped in it. The baron was on top of him, hot breath on his face and Daniel pushing against his shoulders. "Don't." Alexander was panting and not with exertion. He yanked the rest of the shirt off and Daniel bit his lip to keep from crying out as the wound in his side reopened. Alexander looked down at the blood flowing over his finger and drew back.

"What? Do you not have me where you want me? Powerless and at your mercy?" Daniel snarled. "Just do it and be done with it. Take your pleasure and leave."

"You think this rape?" Alexander traced the bridge of his nose, the line of one brow. Daniel shrank from the touch. "Think of it more as a…proposal."

Daniel struggled, tried to push the man off of him, but Alexander easily pinned both his wrists. "And this is the way your kind does this? And you think our ways barbarous?"

"I think this way more kind."

"For whom?" Daniel's eyes were glittering with rage and a fair amount of pain as he tried to free himself and failed.

"For both parties involved. Now be a good lad and lie still for a moment."

"No! A million times no! I'll fight you with my last-"

Alexander smiled. "No need for that. If you want to refuse me, it's quite simple. Kill me." He let go of Daniel's wrists and sat back, still astride him.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Kill me. If you wish to refuse this that is the only option."

"That's monstrous! "

"No, that's the beauty of it, Daniel. No one leaves with a broken heart. Now," He placed Daniel hands around his own throat. "Squeeze."

"I can't."

"You've taken more than your fair share of lives. You can do this. Now end this farce between us."

"I can't! How can you ask this of me? How can you put me through this if you say you love me?" He turned his head to the side, but couldn't hide his sobs. "I just want to go home. Just let me-"

"You have no home." Alexander brushed his hair from his face. Daniel was surprised to see the other man's hands were shaking. "You once said that I was your home. It can be so again, if you wish it."

Daniel closed his eyes.

"Daniel? Will you? Will you murder me?"

He shook his head.

Alexander ran a palm down Daniel's chest, stopping just above the wound in his side. "You realize there is no going back. I gave you your chance. By the ways of my kind we have a contract as binding as if we had sold our souls to one another."

Daniel turned away.

"Well then," Alexander's lips parted in a broad grin. "It appears we are to have ourselves a wedding night." He cupped Daniel's cheek, hooked his thumb under his jaw and forced him to turn back. He leaned over until their foreheads touched. "Now, this next part will hurt."

Afterwards Alexander could not seem to stop touching Daniel. The young man had his back to him, curled up almost into a ball and shivering. Alexander ran his hand over that sweat and blood streaked back, marveling at how soft the skin was, how lovely the bones he could feel underneath were. And all his now. Gently he wrote the word "meine" along Daniel's spine with a finger, pressed a kiss to it as soon as he had finished. "I love you." He whispered, lips against Daniel's shoulder. He gave a small bite when Daniel didn't respond.

Daniel stirred, rolled over to face him, his every motion slow and pained. His face reflected none of the ecstatic emotion that was coursing through Alexander. His eyes were weary, almost dead with exhaustion.

Alexander touched his cheek, traced his lips. "I love you." He repeated louder, desperation bleeding through.

Daniel smiled, tight and grim. "And I hate you. I will hate you until my dying breath, I swear it."

Alexander's smile slipped from his face. He regarded the man in his arms, his new mate. Then he let his human disguise drop. "Your life is tied to mine now and my kind live eons. You will love me again." We have all the time in all the worlds. And as the years pass, my transgressions will fade from your mind.

Daniel shook his head and closed his eyes. Alexander placed his hand over his heart, felt the beating of it against his palm. Mine. Everything mine, his body, his mind, his very soul, except this thing, the thing I most desire. He never knew victory could be such a cold thing.

X

Sorry this is going on much longer than I thought it would. I think there is a chapter or two of epilogue in this still to go... As always, thank you for the lovely reviews and critiques. They are always welcome!