"All of the other usage testing we've done in Vulcan has been flawless. We just have this one, lingering error. But, the third time's the charm, right?"
"'The charm?'"
She chuckled. "Just a reference to an old Human superstition." Sarek only blinked.
"Let's try the original test one more time," Amanda said, turning to the translator.
"Very well," Sarek replied as he picked up the earpiece.
Amanda spoke to the device as before, "I am gratified by your company." Yes, I am, she thought, watching him.
When he listened to the translated phrase, Amanda could swear she saw his body freeze for an instant. "What did you hear?" she asked, concerned.
Sarek's expression was impenetrable as he looked up at her and his rich voice repeated the words, "'I cherish thee.'"
Silence filled the small room for a moment.
Amanda looked back at him, eyes wide. "'I cherish thee'?" That means… but it's only the device translating, not him choosing the words. Out loud, she simply said, "Damn! I think we have our work cut out for us trying to fix this…" She shook her head and bent over the PADD.
Sarek watched her intently, acutely aware of the turmoil in his center. Perhaps, he silently answered, but the device was not in error…
Art Imitating LifeAmanda had wanted to take Sarek to see some examples of Terran visual art, and decided on the spur of the moment to take him to the Memorial Art Museum for their weekly excursion. When they arrived to see that the main exhibition was entitled "Expressions of Love: Visual Art Through the Centuries," she cursed herself for not looking it up ahead of time, but then decided it was probably only she who felt the least bit awkward. And subject matter aside, it was an excellent retrospective of the various styles and media of this art form.
They stopped in front of a large reproduction of a very old photograph. The photo, entitled "V-E Day," showed a sailor holding a nurse in his arms, bending her over almost backwards in a passionate kiss. Amanda exclaimed, "This is an interesting selection for this exhibit!" She explained the World War II context and then added, "Even though the picture appears to show a re-uniting couple, that wasn't the case. Apparently, the soldier was so excited by the victory announcement that he simply grabbed that woman from the crowd and kissed her to celebrate!"
"These two individuals did not even know each other, then?" Sarek's voice, almost as even-toned as usual, had the slightest modulation to it that told her he was practically incredulous.
"Apparently not."
"I find some Human motivations unfathomable."
"Well, consider this: these individuals had been involved in the greatest war experienced on Earth to date, and half of it had just ended. Perhaps in the moment the sailor was merely expressing his joy and relief in the most immediate way possible. Or, as Surak would say, 'the cause was sufficient.'"
"I see," Sarek said, doubtfully enough that it sounded like he didn't. "That is…plausible," he allowed, finally.
He focused on the knowing smile she flashed him. Even though couched in emotional terms, Amanda's logic was sound, and he appreciated it. He admired the way her mind worked, in spite (or was it because?) of the fact that he did not always understand how she reached her conclusions. He followed her into the next section of the exhibit, his eyes fixed on her.
He was struck by a sudden, urgent …yearning. I want this woman, want her deeply, want her now. Vulcan passions were fiercely felt, and Sarek was caught in the throes of one of them at this instant. He smoothly turned away for a moment, appearing to study the work in front of him while he re-composed himself. A quick internal scan revealed nothing awry. As he considered the roiling sensation more carefully, he recognized it to be an amplification and definition of his already acknowledged desire for Amanda – and he wanted her so much. To merge my consciousness with hers; to lose myself in her mind and body; to possess and protect her from all that might separate us; even… to create a family… (Was this even possible? He felt an urgent need to research this). Even in pon farr he had not experienced such multi-layered, complex desire, and it rattled him.
Completely lost in thought, he nearly walked straight into a sculpture. Amanda looked back at him curiously, but he kept his face a mask as he wrestled with the unfamiliar emotions. They are unsettling, to be sure, but there is logic in seeking to join with the one I find so compatible with myself. And I must do so soon, Sarek admonished himself. Such passions cannot be left unaddressed. He mulled over how to best achieve his objective, and, as they walked through the exhibit, he closed the distance between them, his dark eyes never leaving her.
They wandered further through the gallery with its many works in varied media, Amanda having no idea of the upheaval going on inside the mind of her companion. She came to a stop in front of a small neutrally colored drawing. "Oh, look at this! Fragonard's Kiss is one of my favorites."
Sarek peered at the small artwork, momentarily pushing his tumultuous thoughts aside. "What does this depict?"
"It represents the power of love to unite two souls even in the face of death. See, the two lovers in the crypt, which is broken open? Their spirits are brought back to life by the flame from Cupid's torch." She stared wistfully at the drawing for a moment more. "It's a very romantic notion – definitely not a logical one," she finished with an apologetic smile.
Sarek paused as if considering whether to say something. The room was empty save for themselves. Reaching a conclusion, he kept his gaze on the painting as he began to speak. "Actually, from a Vulcan perspective, it could be considered logical." She turned toward him in surprise. "Vulcan mates are joined telepathically, linking one another's katras, or life essences – analogous to what you refer to as 'souls' – in a bond which is said to transcend death. Our life essences can be preserved after the death of the body, and so bondmates need not be permanently separated by physical death." He fell silent. Part of him questioned the wisdom and the logic of revealing such intimate information about his people, especially in this public place, but another part of him was very interested in her reaction. I need to know…
Amanda took a moment to absorb this surprising revelation. Had it been anyone other than Sarek telling her this, she would have been convinced they were relating a myth. "Sarek, that's …amazing. So among your people couples – bondmates — are in constant telepathic contact?"
"In a manner of speaking. It is more an empathic awareness of one another than an active hearing of each other's thoughts, although that is also possible. We are taught to shield our thoughts to provide one another privacy." He continued to stare at the sketch as he spoke.
Fascinated, Amanda wanted to ask him more, but, remembering his divorce, she hesitated.
Seeming to sense her question, Sarek looked toward her and added, "The strength of the bond varies among couples."
"Oh." Then, unable to stifle her curiosity, she asked, "Is this something that is only experienced between Vulcans?" She instantly regretted asking the question and hoped he would somehow misinterpret it.
He did not. Instead he looked directly at her and she thought she would be lost in his liquid gaze. "It is possible for psi-capable Vulcans to share this bond with psi-blind Vulcans," he answered softly, "therefore, if one of a pair were Vulcan, it is quite possible he or she could form such a bond with a member of another species."
"I see," was all she could verbalize, embarrassed by the forthrightness of her question and wondering what it would be like to feel the touch of his mind. She fully expected him to end the conversation at this point, as it was clearly straying beyond what she assumed were acceptable boundaries for him.
Sarek said nothing for a moment, not because he was put off by the subject, but rather because he was seeking to quell his own desire to touch Amanda's mind. Quite inappropriate at this time. But desirable, intriguing, tantalizing… He pushed the thought away. I have much to meditate upon, yet again. However, this is an opportunity to begin the conversation I wish to have with her.
They had reached the end of the exhibit and were walking back out into the sunshine. Amanda had just asked him if he wanted to stop for tea when Sarek turned to her, his expression suddenly serious. He began, "Amanda, I wish to –"
His words were interrupted by Stell's voice coming to him from the steps below where he and T'Lina had been stationed. "S'haile, we have a disturbance –" followed by T'Lina's, directed toward someone else, "You must leave this area at once."
A familiar voice, and an unwelcome one, replied, "So sorry. This is a public place!"
Sarek turned in the direction of the voices and protectively maneuvered Amanda behind him. A holo-camera clicked, capturing his protective stance and framing them both under the large "Expressions of Love" banner in front of the museum.
It was one of the 'gossip column' reporters who had holographed them before. "Gotcha!" she crowed, winking slyly, before she and her holographer disappeared down the stairs.
Sarek controlled his frustration, taking a breath. Stell made as if to pursue but Sarek stopped him with a look. T'Lina spoke. "We ask forgiveness, S'haile. Our service was inadequate."
"We should perhaps re-think our protocols," Sarek concluded.
Amanda was crestfallen. "Sarek, I'm sorry. As part of this 'cultural exchange' we've been doing, I was supposed to help your embassy in handling the Terran press. I think I've done just the opposite." She shook her head, looking up at the banner.
Sarek turned to her, his expression solemn. "Amanda, I would not have you censor your activities due to the bizarre proclivities of the Terran press. And as for any unintended consequences of our activities, I consider them but a small price." Amanda was touched by his chivalry. As they walked down the steps themselves, Sarek added, "I shall notify T'Vey and she will address it."
Amanda smiled wryly at him. "She is getting quite good at it."
Still More Terran PressT'Vey was indeed skilled in her role, and she was able to repress publication of the museum holopic in many but not all outlets. She noted that the holos themselves were now becoming a news item, with editorial debates beginning on the propriety of the press publicizing the ambassador's "relationship." While she found the rampant speculation of the Terran press on the subject rather irrational, she had to concede that the increasing number of holos featuring the kevet-dutar and Dr. Grayson did invite theorizing as to the reason.
She was also aware that it was a matter of time before the embassy was asked for a statement on the matter. She already knew the statement would simply be "No comment," not only because that was the usual embassy policy on matters not of central diplomatic import, but also because, in this case, she had no idea what to say.
DismissalAmanda had come up to meet Sarek about the translator when she noticed that T'Zia's desk, near Sev's, had been emptied and now sat vacant. It seemed like T'Zia had only recently arrived from Vulcan and now she was gone.
The day she had arrived had stuck in Amanda's memory: T'Zia's predecessor at that desk, a young woman named T'Nalla whose function was also unknown to Amanda, had just returned to Vulcan. T'Zia had appeared, offering Sarek some kind of ritualistic greeting and eying him in a strangely appraising manner.
Amanda had only been mildly curious up to that point; it was Sarek's stiff and obviously unwelcoming response that made the incident memorable. Unfortunately, the studiousness with which both Sev and Soran ignored the exchange told her she would not learn any insights from them.
Now, with T'Zia departed, she resolved to ask Sarek.
Ships Burned
"Today was a major deadline for us," Amanda said, almost solemnly, as they sat down with the translator. "We finished testing and de-bugging. The Deltan and Tellarite testing groups have signed off, and now all we need is Soran's concurrence for the Vulcan Embassy sign-off, which we should have after this."
Sarek inclined his head in agreement. "That is a major milestone, and you achieved it rather quickly."
"Yes. My co-project leaders were unhappy with me, but last month I insisted we burn our ships on the beach by committing to meet this deadline before seeking our last tranche of project funds."
Sarek frowned slightly. "I believe you are making a reference to the Spanish conquistador Hernán Cortez, but I do not fully understand."
"Oh yes," Amanda acknowledged. "You are correct the reference is to Cortez, and it means to commit oneself to achieving a goal by eliminating all other options."
"Interesting." Sarek appeared momentarily lost in thought.
"One more time. Do you feel lucky?" Amanda asked, holding out the translator earpiece. While she was hopeful that the translation errors had finally been eradicated from the translator's artificial intelligence, she knew she would miss the many opportunities the project had afforded her to spend time with Sarek.
"No," Sarek stated flatly.
Surprised, Amanda drew herself up in indignation. "Oh, really?"
Sarek took the earpiece, deliberately ignoring her nonplussed expression. "Luck is illogical," he replied, "and in this case I am sure it is not needed."
Shaking her head but smiling, Amanda acknowledged the point as his. "You are a tease, Mr. Ambassador!"
She spoke into the device. "I am gratified by your company."
Sarek listened and then looked up. "I am gratified by your company," he recited back.
For a moment they were both silent. "It appears functional," Sarek asserted.
"Yes. It's been reworked, tested and re-tested extensively before this. It looks like there won't be any more surprises," Amanda replied, her voice a peculiar mix of satisfaction and regret. Then, jokingly she added, "What a relief. Who knows what it would have come up with next after the last few errors?"
There was something unreadable in Sarek's expression as he rejoined quietly, "Indeed."
Amanda had been about to ask him about T'Zia but something about his manner caused her to hesitate. At that moment, Sev entered.
"S'haile, T'Pau is on the comm to speak with you."
"Please excuse me," Sarek said to Amanda as he rose smoothly and expressionlessly to take the call.
SummonsT'Pau's face filled the screen. Without preamble, she demanded, "Sarek, thou must explain thy behavior."
He would not be perturbed by her abrupt manner. "Specify."
"T'Zia is the third eligible female thou has dismissed back to Vulcan with no explanation."
He straightened further and stared back at her. "I do not believe any explanation is required."
"Thy time grows short. It is illogical not to select a bondmate promptly, particularly in thy position." Her use of Old High Vulcan communicated her displeasure with him.
"I have time. It is logical to seek a suitable bondmate."
T'Pau's eyes narrowed. She received news reports from Earth and although much of what the Terran press reported made no logical sense to her, she was aware of the speculation focused on Sarek and a particular Human female. "It is not logical to delay any further. I see that sending candidates to thee is not effective. Therefore I am summoning thee home to Vulcan to complete the process here."
Sarek's brows flew up. "That is unnecessary, Matriarch."
Her voice hardened. "Thou forgets thy place, Sarek. I deem it necessary; therefore thou will come."
"I ask forgiveness, Matriarch," Sarek replied automatically, controlling his temper. At this point he just wanted to end the conversation, but he refused to be maneuvered into an unwanted choice. "I wish to review my options before returning. This is my right. I will evaluate the list of candidates and will respond either with a choice or with my itinerary for returning to Vulcan. Will that be acceptable?"
T'Pau eyed him suspiciously. He had acquiesced too quickly. She, perhaps more than most, knew his stubborn, willful side. "Thou are too important to thy people to make a poorly reasoned choice," she warned in tacit reference to the troublesome news reports.
"Am I also 'too important' to know a meaningful bond, Ko-mekh?" he asked quietly.
Sarek would not express the pain of an empty, and then a broken, bond, but T'Pau already knew. Her tone softened slightly, but she did not relent. "You will not disappoint me, Sa-fu. I expect to either know your choice or your plan to return here within one tevun-krus. Live long and prosper."
"Peace and long life, Ko-mekh," Sarek replied as she leaned forward to cut the connection. He had much to do. He would, he hoped, soon make a choice.