Here is Berrynose's incredibly absurd new entry! He has a lot of issues...
Dear Diary,
I AM SO MAD AND HUMILATED! Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you. BUT IT WAS HORRIBLE. Ok, here's what happened. I was
on border patrol, being completely awesome, when all of a sudden Shadowclan cats were on our side of the territory! So
naturally we attacked, with some real gusto. I was doing awesome, taking down, like, thirty cats at once. But then this big
meanie named Tigerheart came by and was attacking me LIKE A TOTAL NINJA! And then he pinched me very hard. It was
horrible. And Lionblaze laughed at me. And it made me very sad. Sob sob. Anyways. Diary, I just realized something. You're
probably wondering HOW ON EARTH I AM WRITING IN THIS DIARY. I mean, I don't have opposable thumbs. (Darn!) Well
here's your answer. Duck tape. Lots and lots of Duck tape. I'm incredibly excited because tomorrows my birthday, and I
asked for…
More duck tape
A nicer wife
A better name
A flat screen TV
The new iPhone 4s
New shampoo
World peace.
So yeah, I better get this all. I mean, I only asked for a couple things! No, I don't think any of them are too big and fancy. I
DESERVE ALL THESE THINGS! Poppyfrost just slapped me. I guess she doesn't like the second thing on the list. But it's
true! She's such a bully. I mean you're a lovely, sweet, caring person dear! Those claws are very threatening. I must go and
make sure everyone bought me a present. Farewell till tomorrow. Mwhahahaha! Sorry, I had to evilly laugh.
Ha! He is going to be ONE dissapointed kitty tomorrow! Shame on you Berrynose, for being so self obsessed.