AUTHORS NOTE: SORRY I HAVENT POSTED IN FOREVER I HAVE NO EXCUSES... yes, you read that right. I have no excuses. So why am i still talking, you may ask? Well, i'm not talking. I'm typing. SO HA! MWAHAHAHA!
Dear Diary,
Hunting is stupid. I understand the importance of feeding the clan. But why can't we get a nice Chinese take out box instead?
Squirrels are so furry that you can't even taste the meat, rabbits are stringy, birds are dry and crunchy, and mice taste like
over cooked cabbage. I MEAN REALLY. Why can't we just stop at Burger King and grab a nice cheeseburger? I'm sure the
kits would prefer it more than our prey options. The real reason the other clan's mock Riverclan for eating fish is because we're
jealous of them. I mean, hello, as we're crunching on stringy meat, they're enjoying a nice juicy carp. Even Twolegs eat
fish! Plus, when leaf-bare comes, they still have the river (unless it's frozen, which isn't often. Unless it's really cold.) , And
we're eating THINNER, CRUNCHIER, DRYIER food then ever! It's ridiculous! And my Oreos get all cold and hard! I like them
soft and melty! Lionblaze just called me ugly. YOU'RE FACE IS UGLY LIONBLAZE! Ooooh he's gonna need some dock leaves
for that burn! Hehehehe. He's just mad because his Thank you note said " Dear Lionblaze, Thank you for zapping me with a
hundred volts of electricity! You're a real pal!" Well that's what he gets for tazering people! I'm really annoyed, because my
dad, Smoky, sent me a late birthday gift. It was a berry in the shape of a nose. He is forever mocking about my name. He's
the one who let Daisy name me that! IT'S HIS ENTIRE FAULT! HOW COULD HE LET A CAT BE NAMED BERRYKIT? THE
INJUSTICE OF IT ALL! He's a mean daddy. OMS (Oh my Starclan) I was complaining to my therapist (Mothwing; I only
requested her because she doesn't blame all my problems on Starclan. She's an atheist) about how Lionblaze always bullies
me, and she said I should face evilness with love. Stupidest thing I've ever heard, but I'll give it a shot. I'm gonna go give
Lionblaze a big hug! Then we will be BFF's for life! TTYL!
AUTHORS NOTE: Something tells me Berrynose is going to have a few bruises next chapter. I would know, i'm the author. It says so right there, on AUTHORS NOTE. I'm scaring myself with my pathetic rambling, so i'm gonna go. AHH EVIL SPACE MONKEYS ATTACKING... ghjknlmvadlf'bkand;blknb'alkbanklb'lk. Random...