Thirteen leaned against her front door. She could still feel Rachel's tense, angry energy radiating through the frame. She took a deep breath and eased the door open cautiously. Thirteen allowed the doorframe to hold her up as she stared at her feet sheepishly. Across from her, Rachel was leaning against the opposite wall. Her arms were folded tightly to her chest and she wouldn't face Thirteen, but she made no attempts to leave.

"I'm sorry," Thirteen said in a small voice. "I didn't mean to lie to you. I don't like lying to you or not telling you things. I just didn't know what else to do." Thirteen snuck a disheartened glance at Rachel. Her words didn't seem to be having any effect. "Could you talk to me, please? Would you look at me at least? You're still here, that must mean something."

Rachel still wouldn't look at her, "It means I nearly fell asleep on the way over and I don't think I'm alert enough to drive. If I have to I'll sleep in the hall."

"I know I hurt you, but that was never my intention. There are just some things in my life that I am not ready to face. It's easier not to deal with them when I'm with you. If you knew, I would lose that."

Rachel lifted her eyes to meet Thirteen's pleading gaze. "What are you hiding from?"

"I can't tell you that," Thirteen said. Rachel scoffed and turned away again. "I'm sorry, but I can't. Can you please come back inside so we can talk?"

Rachel thought for a moment before taking a deep breath and following Thirteen back into her apartment. When Rachel was finally standing close to her again, Thirteen placed a hand on her arm before Rachel jerked it away.

"Don't fucking touch me," she said sternly. "Just because I'm agreeing to talk doesn't mean we're making up."

"I know. I get it, you're mad at me."

"You have no idea," Rachel said. "I am furious with you. You've been lying to me for months. Over and over again, you lie to me. And that's not to mention the fact that you still won't tell me the truth. I've been nothing but honest with you. I put my trust in you, implicitly, and you betrayed it." Rachel let out a bitter laugh before she continued, "Still, what pisses me off most, what really kills me is that I can't walk away from you!"

"You should," Thirteen said softly. "You should walk out that door and never look back."

Rachel shook her head in annoyance, "Oh, don't do that. Don't play that wounded, passive-aggressive game with me."

"It's no game. This was a mistake. We never should have been together."

"That's all you have to say to me?" Rachel asked. The few tears that slid down Thirteen's cheeks didn't go unnoticed.

"I hurt you. If you stick around I'll keep hurting you."

"Not if you tell me the truth."

"The truth isn't going to change anything! It'll just make me feel more broken and more empty than I already do."

The tears were flowing freely now. Thirteen let herself fall to the couch in desperation. Putting her anger on the backburner, Rachel sat down in one of the chairs across from the couch. For a moment, she only listened to Thirteen's crestfallen sobs. Her shoulders trembled with every tear and Rachel began to worry.

"What could your brother have done to make you cut him out of your life?" Rachel asked. Thirteen shot her an anxious look but didn't respond. "You have to say something. There are a lot of scenarios running through my mind right now, none of them good. Did he hurt you?"

Thirteen shook her head, "It's nothing he did, it's just something that's a part of him. Now he's sick and I'm supposed to sit by his bedside and be strong and I can't do it."

"So, that's it? You're giving up on your brother, on me, on yourself?"

"Yeah, I guess I am."

"That's not the Remy Hadley I know."

Thirteen looked at Rachel starkly, "The Remy Hadley you know is a lie. All of this is just another lie. You and I don't have a future together. At least, not anything lasting. If you stay, someday soon this will all be a memory to keep you company while you watch me die."

Rachel's jaw dropped and she was completely taken aback, "Remy…"

"You know, I really don't have any answers for you tonight," Thirteen said. She rose calmly from the couch and made her way to the bedroom. "Goodnight."

The apartment was quiet as Rachel readied herself for work. She showered and dressed quickly before vacating the bedroom as Thirteen began to stir. In the kitchen, she poured herself a large cup of coffee. She hadn't slept well and she didn't imagine Thirteen had fared any better. She stared into her coffee while she waited for Thirteen to finish. After a while, Rachel returned to the bedroom and sat at the edge of the bed. Thirteen soon emerged from the bathroom, dressed for work, and stopped short when she saw her.

"What did your dad want last night?" Rachel asked without looking up.

"He wanted me to go see my brother. He's not doing well."

"You're really not going?"

"Not any time soon," Thirteen said.

"Did you mean what you said about us? About wanting me to leave?"

"I love you. I don't want you leave, I just think you'd be better off if you did."

"I'm not going to leave you, Remy. I'm hurt and angry, but I do love you," Rachel said. She finally turned to face Thirteen. "We should talk about this later. Will you be free tonight?"

Thirteen nodded, "You could spend the night. If we get into it again, I'll take the couch this time."

Rachel smiled at Thirteen's small joke, but sobered quickly, "No more fights. I just want to work things out." She stood silently and left Thirteen to finish getting ready.

That afternoon Thirteen stole away to Rachel's office. She peered through the window for a moment, watching Rachel as she sat hunched over a pile of paperwork. She knocked tentatively before peeking her head in. Rachel glanced up as Thirteen entered. "What's up?" she asked.

"I brought you a sandwich. I thought maybe we could have lunch together."

Rachel nodded and Thirteen sat down across from her. As they began to eat, she was keenly aware of Thirteen watching her.

"Is there something on your mind?" she asked.

"I just wanted to apologize for last night. It's hard for me to tell you things sometimes. My life with you is simple and happy and I didn't want anything to ruin that."

"Lying never makes things simple, Remy. I think I deserve a little honesty from you."

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to keep that part of my life separate from us."

"What part?"

"Don't ask me that. You know I can't answer that."

"Won't answer," Rachel muttered.

"Can't," Thirteen insisted. "My life is hard enough and sooner than I ever expected it'll be over. Why is it so wrong for me to want to keep some part of it happy?"

"So, the only way you can be happy with me is by keeping secrets?"

"That's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean? Really?"

"What do you want from me? I'm trying to explain myself."

"You're trying to rationalize."

"I'm trying to make you understand. There are things about my life and my family that I don't want to deal with."

"I can't live in denial with you," Rachel said softly.

"Are you trying to force me to choose between you and the truth?"

"No, I'm just being honest. And that's all I want from you."

"Fine," Thirteen sighed in frustration. "I'm honestly not comfortable telling you everything."

"I don't know if I can accept that."

Thirteen laughed slightly, "I can't keep one thing to myself?"

"I don't know, Remy. I don't know what it is or how it affects us or you or me."

"It only affects me. And I'd like to keep it that way."

Rachel frowned harshly at Thirteen, "You can't close yourself off like that. Anything that affects you affects me!"

"This is my life, Rachel," Thirteen said in a low voice. "Mine! I've shared everything I can with you. All I'm asking is to hold on to this one thing."

Rachel shook her head and jumped to her feet, "You don't know what you're asking. You have no idea how it feels to be in this position. I've known you almost two years and apparently you've been lying to me the whole time. Now you want me to trust you enough to bury this? In case you haven't noticed keeping secrets is tearing us apart!"

"Because you can't let go!" Thirteen almost yelled. She rushed around the desk and stood in front of Rachel. "You're obsessing over this. Over everything. You're so busy trying to make sure we have a future that you're ruining what we have now."

"I can't do this right now," Rachel said through gritted teeth. "You should go."

Thirteen turned on her heel and stormed out of the office. Rachel slammed her hands down on the desk. As a fit of pique took over she violently knocked everything to the floor.

Rachel trudged through the door tiredly. She glanced around the apartment anxiously for a moment before realizing that Thirteen wasn't home yet. She hopped into the shower and let the warm water wash over her body, hoping that the stress of her day might wash down the drain.

She dragged herself from the shower and toweled off. Just as she pulled on a pair of shorts and a thin t-shirt, her phone rang. She hesitated as she noticed Thirteen's number.

"Hey," Rachel answered. "I just got in. Are you on your way?"

"No, I'm going to be a while. They just called a code seven."

"A lockdown? Any idea why?"

"Nope, I'm stuck in the cafeteria." Thirteen sighed dramatically, "I guess our big talk will have to wait. I was so looking forward to it."

"Oh, I'm sure you were," Rachel said drolly. "Try not to be so pleased with the delay."

"What are you wearing?" Thirteen asked.

"I hope you don't think you can assuage my anger by being cute."

"Can't I?"

"No."

"I'm just saying, if you're in those little shorts I like with the shirt I can see your nipples through, you'll pretty much win any argument we might have tonight."

Rachel looked down at her clothes, at the outfit Thirteen had just described. She smirked to herself, but kept her tone neutral, "I'll see you when you get home, Remy."

"I'll be there as soon as I can."

Rachel felt thankful for the reprieve as she hung up. She grabbed a book and made herself comfortable on the couch. As she started to read, her heavy lids made it clear that sleep was not far behind.

A sharp knocking startled Rachel from her shallow slumber. She bolted upright and begrudgingly pulled herself from her position on the couch to answer the door. "Yes?" she asked, her voice heavy with sleep. Rachel tried to take stock of the visitor as she rubbed her eyes. Before her stood a man in his late fifties. His dark hair and clear blue eyes gave him away instantly.

"Sorry, I was looking for Remy Hadley."

"You must be her dad," Rachel said. As he gave her a nod, she stepped aside to let him enter.

"John Hadley," he said, extending his hand to Rachel, who shook it nervously.

"Rachel Galvin. Nice to meet you." Rachel finally remembered her appearance and her cheeks began to flush. "Would you excuse me a moment? Please make yourself at home." Rachel rushed to the bedroom to hunt for a robe. She covered herself hurriedly and returned to find Mr. Hadley at the kitchen table.

"I'm sorry to stop by so late," Mr. Hadley said. "Remy's usually a night owl."

"There was a problem at the hospital. She isn't home. If you want to wait for her, I could make tea or something," Rachel offered awkwardly.

"That'd be great."

Rachel didn't hesitate to start on the tea. She was glad to have something between her and the tension of the moment. There was so much Thirteen had hidden from her father; Rachel herself was proof of that. It was difficult to tiptoe around the truth when she didn't know what lies had been told.

"Are you Remy's roommate?" Mr. Hadley asked, snapping Rachel from her thoughts.

"No, I–we're just friends. I just crash here every now and then," Rachel answered. She instantly rolled her eyes at how ridiculous that sounded.

"You know her pretty well then?"

"I suppose so," Rachel said tentatively. She poured the tea between two mugs and took them to the table. As she sat down with Mr. Hadley, she suddenly felt even more anxious than before.

"Has she told you about her brother?"

Rachel nodded, "She told me he wasn't doing well. I'm sorry."

"I tried to talk to her yesterday, but she's taking the news pretty hard. Maybe you could talk to her for me," Mr. Hadley proposed. "I know she signed the agreement a long time ago. If she doesn't want to be his healthcare proxy, that's fine, but–"

"Healthcare proxy?" Rachel interrupted. "I don't understand."

"He was put on a respirator last week. Remy agreed to take over his healthcare once that happened. She signed the agreement a few years ago."

"A few y–" Rachel stopped short as the realization dawned on her. Her head spun as the gravity of it all caught up with her. "He has Huntington's."

"You didn't know?" Mr. Hadley asked. "How much did she tell you about her brother?"

Rachel scoffed and shook her head furiously, "Until last night I didn't even know she had a brother. She only said that he was sick." She scowled into her tea as she slouched over the table, her shoulders hunched tensely.

Mr. Hadley studied Rachel carefully, "How long have you known my daughter?"

"A year and a half or so," Rachel muttered.

"How long have you been together?" Mr. Hadley watched as Rachel's head snapped up. At a loss for words, she could only give him a long, vacant stare. "You're too comfortable here to be an occasional guest," he explained. "It's okay. I'd just like to know a little about my daughter's life. She'd never tell me on her own."

"We've been together for five months."

"Don't worry. I'll tell her I guessed," Mr. Hadley said. He got a small laugh from Rachel before her frown returned. "Remy always did like to keep things to herself."

Rachel nodded, "Don't I know it. I just never thought she'd keep something so important from me."

"Neither did I. I feel like I don't know her anymore."

Rachel looked at Mr. Hadley pitifully. He had no idea how much his daughter was keeping from him. "I can talk to Remy for you, try and bring her around. I can't make any promises, though. You know how stubborn she is."

Rachel and Mr. Hadley shared a laugh until they were interrupted by the clatter of the front door. They fell silent for a moment as Thirteen came through the door.

"Rach?" she called. "I had the weirdest night, you'll never believe it. Wilson and I–" Thirteen stopped suddenly as she walked through the foyer and set eyes on her father. "Dad. What are you doing here?"

"I was just having a talk with your girlfriend," Mr. Hadley said. Thirteen's eyes widened at his choice of words. "I wanted to see if you'd changed your mind."

"I haven't," Thirteen said quickly. "Rachel, can I talk to you for a moment?" Thirteen headed for the bedroom with Rachel close behind. She closed the door after them, but feeling like they could still be seen, she pulled Rachel into the bathroom and drew the curtain that partitioned it from the bedroom. "Girlfriend?" Thirteen whispered. "You outed me to my dad?"

"I'm hanging out in your one-bedroom apartment dressed like this," Rachel said, opening her robe. "It's pretty obvious who I am to you."

"You could have covered."

"I tried. The only thing I could think to say was that I crash here sometimes. God, I sounded like an idiot. I can't lie to your dad for you."

"Why did you even let him in?"

"What was I supposed to do? Ignore the knocking until he went away? He came to see you. Do you have any idea how lucky you are?"

"Yeah, my dad's here begging me to do something I don't want to do. He's uncovered secrets about my life I never intended for him to find out–"

"You have a father who loves you. One who cares about you enough to go out of his way check on you. One who isn't so preoccupied with his own bullshit that his only way of dealing with you is to ignore you," Rachel growled, no longer bothering to keep her voice down. She stormed from the bathroom and grabbed her clothes, pulling them on in a hurry.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to wait in the hall so you can talk to your dad."

"I don't want to talk to him," Thirteen insisted.

"Then go out there and tell him that," Rachel said. She began to make her exit, turning back to Thirteen only for a second. "By the way, your dad isn't the only one who uncovered secrets tonight. More lies, Remy."

Rachel rushed from the apartment. She paced the hallway for a moment before coming to rest across from Thirteen's door. She leaned her head against the wall and tried to calm down. She could feel herself losing it; her breaths were coming raggedly and her body began to tremble. When she could no longer hold it back, Rachel lashed out at the wall. She slammed her hands against it over and over again while she berated it with kicks. She unleashed one good punch on the wall before the resulting pain snapped her from her rage.

Tears streamed down Rachel's cheeks as she sunk to the floor. She hugged her knees and buried her face as she tried to muffle her heaving sobs. Her eyes stung, her throat hurt, a thick, salty taste took over her mouth, and a dull ache began to weigh in her chest. Rachel could hear the muffled sounds of Thirteen's conversation. She could hear pieces of her father's plaintive pleas. Thirteen was telling him no again.

Rachel began to pull herself together. She stubbornly slowed her breathing far below the rate her body was demanding but it eventually submitted to the new rhythm. Still, she couldn't hold the tears back. They were having no part of Rachel's attempts to preserve her pride.

The door clicked open suddenly and Rachel wiped the tears away furiously, though she was sure the glisten of her cheeks would be a dead giveaway. As Mr. Hadley exited the apartment slowly, Rachel hung her head and hoped he wouldn't notice her. She had no such luck, but thankfully Mr. Hadley seemed considerate of her current state.

"It was nice meeting you, Rachel," he said quietly. "Take care."

Rachel could only nod slightly. As he left the building, she half-noticed Thirteen standing in the doorway. She looked up at her sadly, "You can't keep putting me in this position."

"What position?"

"I want to be angry. I want to be furious with you and tell you off. I want to stay away from you until you earn my trust back, but I can't. I understand now. It all makes sense now. Why you don't visit your family. Why you won't tell your dad about your diagnosis. Why you won't see your brother."

"I told you, there are things that I can't face yet."

"Well, all those things are staring you down," Rachel said, pulling herself from the floor. "So, you'd better get ready to deal." She walked back into the apartment and headed for the bedroom. She crawled onto the bed and sat with her knees pulled to her chest again.

Thirteen leaned against the wall and watched Rachel silently for a few moments. "I'm sorry I hurt you," she said after a while.

"Comes with the territory, I guess," Rachel shrugged. "You're the only person I've ever let close enough to hurt me."

"I know. I'm sorry."

Rachel didn't seem to hear her, "I can't help wondering if we were ever close."

"That's not fair, Rachel."

"It's not only fair, it's the truth," Rachel said. "You keep putting lies between us. I let you in, we gave this thing between us a good run, and I thought we were sharing our lives with each other. But looking at the last few days, I don't feel like I know you anymore."

"You do, you know me better than anyone. I've never lied to you about who I am."

"No, you just lied about your family, your history. That's not much better," Rachel said. "How could you do this to them? They're your family."

"I had to. If my dad knows I'm sick, then he'll lose everything. If I keep things light and simple between us, he'll still have hope," Thirteen sniffled. She rubbed at her eyes as tears fell in rivulets. "Why should I take that from him?"

"There's one thing I don't understand. You said you didn't want your brother to be your brother. Why push him out of your life?"

"If he wasn't my brother, if we weren't related, he wouldn't be dying. He'd be safe and healthy."

"Well, I got half an answer," Rachel mumbled.

"Sorry, did I lie to you again?" Thirteen sneered.

"Yourself this time. I think you're afraid that if you see your brother, then you'll lose everything. You'll lose hope."

"What can I do?" Thirteen asked pleadingly. "What can I do to fix this?"

"Go see your brother."

"I meant with you."

"There's nothing you can do to make me feel any less like the person I'm closest to has been ripped away from me. But you can call your dad and tell him you'll go see your brother."

Thirteen shook her head quickly, "I told you I can't do that. You just said you think that would take away my hope. Why would you want that for me?"

"Because that's what real here," Rachel said softly. "You and your brother have Huntington's. Your life isn't simple and light and you can't protect your dad from any of this. But if you don't go and be with your family you will regret it."

Thirteen shook her head as the tears overtook her. Rachel walked over to her and led her to the bed. She pulled Thirteen into her arms and brushed her tears away gently. When Thirteen had calmed a bit, Rachel spoke a few careful words, "You weren't there when your mom died and I know you still carry that with you. If you aren't there for your brother, it'll be worse. He needs you."

"I can't do it," Thirteen cried.

Rachel nodded against Thirteen's neck, "You can. You're stronger than you think. And I'll go with you." She pulled Thirteen closer and rubbed her back until she began to relax. As they settled in for the night, Rachel stayed close, holding Thirteen tightly the whole time.

Thirteen was slow to stir the next morning. She pulled herself out of bed hesitantly. The smell of fresh coffee filled the air and she could hear Rachel beginning her day. A glance at the clock sent her to wash and dress quickly.

When she entered the kitchen she found Rachel in the middle of her morning routine, nursing a cup of coffee as she read the newspaper. Rachel flipped through the paper with her left hand before going for her coffee, again with her left hand. In Rachel's lap, Thirteen spied her right hand gingerly resting against an ice-filled kitchen towel.

"Morning," Thirteen said quietly.

"Morning. Breakfast is on the stove."

Thirteen nodded and retrieved the plate Rachel had left for her. She grabbed her own cup of coffee and joined Rachel at the table. Although she wasn't hungry, she pushed the food around the plate and forced herself to eat. "What happened to your hand?" she asked after a while.

"Punched a wall. It's fine."

Thirteen looked at Rachel sheepishly, "You should let me look at it. I know you're still angry, but–"

"I'm not," Rachel said quickly. "I'll see you at work. Maybe we can meet for lunch." She rose from the table and collected her things, throwing Thirteen an uncertain smile before she headed for the door.

When lunchtime came Thirteen was returning to the hospital after running an errand. In her hand she held a large paper bag. She went for the elevator and waited patiently as it ascended to her floor. When the doors opened, she made her way to Rachel's office and quickly knocked on the door before entering. She placed the bag on the desk and shot Rachel a smile. "From that diner you like," she said. She began unpacking the bag, unwrapping a large sandwich. "Pastrami, coleslaw, extra Swiss, Russian dressing on one side, spicy mustard on the other, piled high on rye bread."

"You brought me a Rachel?"

"And fries," Thirteen added cheerfully.

"And you've cleverly brought me more food than I would ever eat on my own."

Thirteen dropped her gaze to the floor disappointedly and Rachel instantly regretted her words. "I just wanted to do something for you. If you don't want to have lunch together, I'll go."

"I didn't mean it like that. I was trying to be coy or something–I don't know," Rachel sighed. "I'm sorry."

Thirteen nodded, "It's okay. I understand. You have every right to be upset with me."

"I'm not. I'm not being passive-aggressive. I'm not punishing you. You don't have to try and make amends," Rachel said, gesturing to the sandwich. "I'm honestly not angry."

"Okay…why exactly aren't you angry?"

"I told you, I get it now. All this time, you've been hiding, pretending just so you could get through the day. I can't be angry with you for trying to cope."

"So everything's just fine now?"

"No, I didn't say that. Things are still pretty messed up between us," Rachel said. "I'm still hurt. I still feel this distance between us. Things are awkward and uncomfortable right now, but we'll get past it."

"Right," Thirteen said quietly.

"Well, I'm not going to give up on you," Rachel told her. Thirteen looked up at her with disbelief. "That seems to be what you're waiting for, what you're hoping for even."

"I just don't want to ever put you in the situation I'm in with my brother."

"That should be my choice."

"And you're going to stick with me forever? Are you honestly saying you're willing to make that commitment?"

Rachel hesitated, "I can't know that right now. I don't know what forever looks like. I can't even imagine life five years from now. All I know is that for as far as I can see, I want to be with you. No matter what."

Thirteen gave her a weak smile and turned her focus to lunch. As they ate, she noticed Rachel was still reaching for things with her left hand. "Let me see your hand," she said, moving to Rachel's side.

"It's fine," Rachel insisted.

Thirteen took Rachel's hand as she offered and looked it over carefully. "Is it fine or are you using the pain to deal?"

"That's not how it works, Remy."

"This is my fault. I don't want you hurting yourself because I did something stupid," Thirteen said. She looked at Rachel squarely, "This is going to sound weird given the last couple of days, but you can be honest with me. I want you to talk to me about this."

Rachel sighed, "It's not not helping, but I'm not using it on purpose. I just don't want to broadcast the fact that I tried to take out a wall."

Thirteen nodded and kissed Rachel's hand delicately, "I'm sorry."

Rachel smiled at Thirteen as she continued the examination. Pain radiated through her hand when she attempted to stretch her fingers outward, and when Thirteen asked her to make a fist, her middle finger crossed over her ring finger.

"Well," Thirteen said. "The knuckle isn't sunken, but there's a lot of swelling and you can't keep your fingers straight. I'll need to get you to radiology, but I think you fractured it."

The pair finished lunch quickly and headed for the radiology department. Thirteen x-rayed Rachel's hand, and brought the films to the viewing room. As soon as she placed the films against the lightbox they were able to see the problem.

"There it is," Thirteen said, pointing to the knuckle of Rachel's middle finger.

"Wonderful," Rachel grumbled.

"It's not bad, just a hairline fracture. You should only need a splint for a couple of weeks."

She led Rachel back to her office, stopping briefly in the clinic to gather supplies. When she returned, Thirteen pulled out a splint and began to affix it to Rachel's hand. It was made of coated metal and had a soft foam liner to rest against the skin. It followed the contours of Rachel's hand and curled under her fingers so that not even the tips hung over. Thirteen applied tape just above the knuckles and loosely covered everything with a compression bandage. "You're all fixed up. How's it feel?"

"Like a really stupid way to blow off steam," Rachel sighed.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing. I make my own choices."

"You don't make them in a vacuum. I'm at fault, too."

Rachel quickly changed the subject, "Did you call your dad?" Thirteen shook her head as a guilt-stricken look came over her. "You're really not going?"

"I have to go," Thirteen sighed. "It's like you said, he needs me. I just can't seem to call my dad. Were you serious about going with me?"

"Of course." Rachel took Thirteen by the hand, "Do you want me to call your dad?"

"No, it should be me, I just can't bring myself to do it."

"We could just show up," Rachel suggested. Thirteen nodded and Rachel pulled her into a hug. "I love you, Remy. Please trust that I am always here for you."