Title: Destroyed (7/?)

Rating: M

Content: slash, violence, unpleasant things that will be revealed throughout

Characters: Raw Roster, main characters Randy Orton, Evan Bourne, John Cena

Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue

Distribution: ffn, lj, anywhere else ask first

Summary: Evan has a terrible secret, Randy and John are determined to help him, but Evan knows what's at stake should anyone find out. Set around current Raw storylines (loosely).

Evan had turned away from Randy the moment the words left his lips. He couldn't handle seeing the hatred and disgust that he was sure would have appeared on Randy's face. God knew the self-hatred he felt in his own heart at his actions. He awaited the explosion; he knew Randy had a fiery temper and had no doubt that it would soon be making itself evident.

Instead there was silence. That was probably worse than anger, as Evan had no clue what was going through Randy's mind. He eventually turned around, to see the older man sitting with his head in his hands, such dejection in his posture it broke Evan's heart a little more.

"How long?" Randy eventually growled, not looking up.

"What?"

"How long have you been sleeping with him?" Randy's words were cool and deliberate, as he tried to keep his emotions under control. Of all the things Evan could have said, that was the last thing he'd expected, and probably the one thing that could hurt the most. He was trying with all the patience within him to remain calm because in a second he felt like he would explode.

"Since Nexus beat me down the first time," Evan muttered quietly. When Randy didn't respond, he continued, "Barrett approached me after I'd been seen by the medic. He said I had two options: sleep with him or be out of commission permanently. I knew Nexus were more than capable of finishing me off, so I made my decision." Shame coloured Evan's features and he couldn't bring himself to even look at Randy.

"Why didn't you come to me or John?" Randy looked up, anger flashing across his face, "we'd have protected you, why did you let it go this far? Why even get involved in his games? Why didn't you tell us when John got caught up in this?" Randy stood up and paced the room, fists clenched as rage engulfed him.

"What was I supposed to say Randy? Oh hey, guess what, I've just whored myself out to Nexus to save my career?" Fury burned in Evan's eyes as he stood up for himself for the first time in longer than he cared to remember. "What could you have done? Be my bodyguard 24 hours a day? You'd have just felt guilty as hell when they did eventually catch up with me and ended my career, because you and I both know that's what would have happened. And god help me I fought hard enough to get to where I am today and I wasn't prepared to give it up, no matter what, and I know I made a bad decision, but damn I made my decision because I thought I could handle it, and I have to live with the consequences. Not you, me." Evan laughed bitterly, "and you know the most stupid thing of all? I'm just a pawn in his plan to get one over on you. It's not me he wants, it's not John, it's to take you out of action so that he controls Raw. It's all about you Randy, one way or another."

Evan stood up and stormed off to his bedroom, anger rapidly receding and heartbreak taking its place. He didn't even know what Randy thought of him right now, the only thing he was sure of was that the love he'd spoken of earlier had surely disappeared.

Randy didn't move. He was trying to process everything he'd just heard but it was taking a long time to permeate through his brain. Evan, brave, independent, courageous Evan, had slept with Barrett. He'd been drawn into the power struggles and mind games of those at the top of WWE and had tried to handle it on his own. Randy's heart ached for the young man but at the same time the anger and revulsion within him was hard to deny. Was Evan right, had the revelation killed Randy's love? Randy wasn't sure, but the pain in his heart when he thought of the younger man told him that love was still there. It was damaged, but it remained.

Slowly, Randy worked out what he needed to do. He made his way upstairs, finding Evan's room and knocking softly on the door. When there was no response, he pushed it open and entered the room, finding Evan sat on the floor at the foot of his bed, staring blankly into space.

"Ev?" He sat down next to the younger man, close but not touching him. "You should have come to me or John. We'd have worked things through, somehow."

"Yeah cos things are working out fantastically at the moment aren't they?" Evan sneered bitterly, and then sighed. "I'm sorry, I just... I underestimated him, and I tried to warn you and John... and it's all fucked up anyway."

"I know. I just wish you'd talked to us."

"Easy to say now, but after the first time... I don't know it's like he already could see how I felt about you and how you used to feel about me, and he used that. He used to say to me, how would you like it if Randy found out you were a Nexus whore, and the thought of that killed me. I came to accept that we'd never be together but I wanted to keep your friendship at least, and he'd constantly throw that in my face. He used to threaten to tell you to get me to do what he wanted, and that was the one thing that scared me the most, losing you as a friend."

"I still love you," the words left Randy's mouth before he even realised, "I'm hurt, I'm... fuck I never thought it'd be something like this Ev, but you're still the same stubborn, independent, strong man I fell in love with. I just... I'm gonna fucking kill the bastard." Randy's rage subsided suddenly and his hand flew to his mouth, "oh my god, John, what if he's done the same to him?"

Evan laughed bitterly, "John's not his type, he goes for smaller, sluttier guys like me. Anyway, he uses Gabriel when I'm not around."

"He's not touching you again," Randy was vehement, "I swear to god he even comes near you and I'll kill him. Let Gabriel entertain him because I will not let him hurt you any more."

"I don't think Justin's always a willing participant," Evan stated quietly. He'd seen how he was around Barrett and the other Nexus members and he was sure that he didn't want to be in the position he currently found himself.

"Shit." Randy hadn't expected that. He'd viewed all of Nexus as a coherent entity, not realising that not all of them knew or approved of what was going on. Then he realised the full implication of Evan's words, "you weren't always willing either, were you?"

"I don't think 'willing' is the right word, but you're right, sometimes he didn't take any notice if I tried to say no." Evan swallowed deeply, knowing that confession would shadow their relationship for a long time to come.

"Jesus Evan," Randy felt like they were both being pummelled from all angles here, and he did all he knew how to do, pulling Evan into his arms and holding him tightly, burying his face in his hair. He needed to make this right.

Evan finally felt comfortable and safe. The worst of the story was now in the open, and Randy was still here. He didn't know what would happen in the future but right now Randy was willing to give him a chance and that was something he would grasp with both hands.

Eventually Randy pulled back and looked at Evan carefully, large hands caressing his cheeks. "When was the last time you slept properly?"

Evan shrugged, "I don't know."

"You have to look after yourself Ev," Randy sighed. "I've been so worried about you."

"That's what he wants, that's why I tried to stay away, I hoped you would forget about me."

"Never," Randy moved a little so that Evan could lean against him, one arm holding him close. "We're stronger together. Now what do I have to do to get my Evan to smile again?"