Authors notes: Been a while. But here's an update for you all. I do intend to get back to writing this story at some point, but I want to fix a lot of narrative problems with the Russel and Dalek arcs first which will affect the story going forwards. I have been working through them this past year, but I'm not yet done with them yet.

I've made some small changes since the last update to the overall story.

A major change I've made relevant to this arc is that originally Raven had found three girls who she thought were like her trapped in a shard of glass. I've altered that, so now the Master is introducing Raven to her apparent 'real father,' Willard Roth.

Another major change I've made is in relation to the Russel arc. I've restored the original, tragic ending I had in mind for it, so it properly closes the door on their relationship rather than leaving it open, and Raven doesn't take the conclusion it well.

Chapter 102

The Death of Hope?

The tunnel ran for miles and was so black it was dangerous. Ace had commented on it and suddenly there was light. Two broadening cones of it. When followed back Ace found they came from Grey's eyes. Literally from behind her pupils.

"Neat party trick." Ace said, though she still found it creepy. Grey made the mistake of gloomily looking into Ace's eyes. "Give over!" Ace clamed her eyes shut and turned her head away, waving her hand in front of herself to make the Grey Raven look away.

Grey Raven looked ahead, hands gripping her cloak together like she was cold. Weirdly, it didn't feel all that cold down.

Shortly afterwards, they came across something curious. It looked like a bubble in the wall, sealing off a side cavern. Warm light poured out of it so Grey could switch off her eyes.

"What's in there?" Ace asked, cautiously approaching it.

"Bad things." Grey said.

"Very helpful."

There was a room beyond, the stone roundels indicated that it was a room on the TARDIS. Sitting in the middle of the room, in the lotus position, eyes closed was Raven herself, the proper one. Her brow was furrowed and her form shifted left and right as she tried to levitate off the floor, but appeared to be having some difficulty. Her relaxed finger began to clench, her knuckles cracked and her eyes snapped open.

She was up to her feet in an instant, running her hands through her hair. She clamped her hands onto her chest of draws, above which hung a mirror. She glared at her own reflection before she wrenched at the draw, rocking it back and fourth, slamming it against the wall causing damage. She stamped around like an enraged beast in a cage.

"What's her problem?" Ace asked.

"The Doctor had just... frightened us." Grey said, "We're... not used to being frightened. Not by a mortal."

The real Raven was holding her hands like she had something in them. Then she took the top of it and twisted the invisible thing sharply. Ace turned to Grey.

"I was imagining that I had the Doctor in my hands and I was ripping his head off."

"Charming." Ace said, "That's teenage anxiety for you." Ace shrugged. "What did you do?"

"I... I... I had murdered an entire species of shadow creatures." Raven said meekly. Ace stared at her.

"Yeah, that'd set him off alright." Ace said dryly.

"They were evil, I thought killing them would be a good deed. The Doctor didn't agree."

"Yeah, the Doctor's never had that kind of black and white morality." Ace said, "'Everything has every right to exist.' He'd said. It's why he could never bring himself to end the Daleks once and for all."

"I don't want to look at it." Grey said, turning away, "it... hurts me."

"Come on then, Sunshine." Ace began leading her further down the cave and away from the bad memory. Briefly, Grey had to turn on her eyes again until they found another glowing bubble. Noises were coming from it, stifled screams, and animalistic noises.

Rounding the corner Ace got a good look. Grey hid around the back of her so as to not see.

It was an ivory and silver room. Raven was on the floor writhing like a girl possessed, around her were several funny, short monks who just stood there staring at Raven. The Raven in the image and the monks were in much more modest robes than what Raven wore now.

"What's going on here?" Ace asked.

"It's Chakra torture." Grey said and pressed herself into Ace's back to try to move her along. "It... it hurts... really... really hurts."

"What did you do that time?" Ace asked.

"I existed." Grey said.

Raven stopped writhing and tried to get her strength back. She flung her arm out and a blast of darkness came, but it washed over the monks as Raven began to writhe again. They only stopped when Raven stopped hissing like a beast and began to cry, tears fell down her face. She fell limp, tired.

Ace wanted to break through that bubble and give those teenage monks a right good kicking. Ace couldn't stand bullies.

One of the monks approached Raven, and nudged her with her boot. "You are not welcome here demon." It was a girl monk.

Raven's eye snapped open and like lightening she grabbed the leg of the girl monk firmly, bore her teeth and with a hiss sunk her chompers into the girls calf. The girls screamed and fell to the floor. Raven began to screech and twitch again but the depths of her rage kept her hands and jaws clamped firmly on the girls calf drawing blood. Attacking Raven again was the worst thing they could do it seems as Raven began to wrench and...

It was like a scene out of a George A. Romero film and best not described. Blood pooled around them. The monks stopped attacking and Raven pulled herself free and shot down the corridor like a force of nature, blood dribbled down her chin. More blood spilled out of the gaping wound Raven had left in the girl, the goth teens teeth marks were firmly, and probably permanently, imprinted in the girls leg.

"That evil demon bitch!" The girl bellowed after Raven. "She bit me!"

The bubble went dark.

"Shit..." Ace said, Grey behind her was trembling. Ace turned to her. "Hey, it's alright. They can't hurt you now."

"I shouldn't have bit her." Grey said. "I didn't want to bite her."

"Honestly, Sunshine. I'd have done the same." Ace said. "No matter what you did, what they were doing to you looked excessive." Ace said, "There is a line where punishment becomes sadistic torture."

"I shouldn't have bit her." Grey repeated. "It was the worst possible thing I could do. People only ever see you react, they never ask what set you off."

The bubble came to life again and there came another image. Grey clutched herself to Ace. This one featured Raven and another taller woman with some of Raven's features. Raven's mother? Her mother looked, Raven's face looked heavy with annoyance.

The memory had barely played for ten seconds when Grey screamed and shot down the cave, hands up to her face, leaving a trail of tears behind her.

"Oi, Sunshine, wait!" Ace took off after the Grey Raven.

The shard hovered in mid air as Raven finished the incantation. The mirror shard glowed and light pooled around it, forming into a shape. Slender, and a little taller than Raven. A male humanoid shape.

A kindly face emerged as her father stood before her in a ghostly form. He looked at his hands, then his arms. Then at Raven herself.

"Raven..." He said happily. Raven reached out for him, but her fingers passed through him. Despite her best efforts he was still just an image, just one with a very sharp core to it.

"Well done, my dear Raven." The Master said.

"I told you to stop calling me that!" Raven warned. "I can't release you from here," Raven spoke to her father, "it'd take more power than I am capable of. The only people who can properly undo it are the ones who did it to you."

"The Monks of Azarath." Father nodded.

"Then we shall make haste to Azarath." The Master said, "Together, we shall tear down that corrupt order and restore Willard to full life."

The Master felt a tightness in his neck.

"I've still got my eye on you." Raven warned him.

They moved back through the temple. Behind her Father walked, but being just an image he appeared to be walking in thin air as the rate of his steps didn't match his speed.

"I'm proud of you Raven." Father said, Raven didn't meet his eye, but she was smiling.

The ground began to shudder. The Ether began to rip itself in half as something forced its way into existence. With a familiar, but different wheeze and groan an old cupboard materialised in front of the trio. Everything fell silent with a loud thud.

The new TARDIS doors opened and out stepped...

"Doctor?!" Raven exclaimed. He stood there, battered, bruised, his thin face bleeding from a nasty cut, and his outfit in tatters. He stood like a valiant hero.

"You won't believe what I had to go through to get here." The Doctor said casually. "I escaped Daleks, found a lost TARDIS that I luckily still had the key to, spent two months trying to persuade it to do as I wanted and then followed my TARDIS's time trail through a psychic barrier to here, and I don't mind telling you it really hurt." He was as jovial as ever. "Oh, I had an idea you'd show up sometime." He said, nodding at the Master. "Though I seem to recently be meeting you out of order. I think this is the first time I've seen this incarnation before it became all crispy?"

"I see regeneration has done nothing to cure your insolence." The Master said.

"Why fix what isn't broken when it comes to you?" The Doctor answered. "So, we're down to kidnapping teenage girls now are we?" The Doctor tutted and turned to Raven. "Come on Rae-Rae, lets go back to the TARDIS. I've took the liberty of extracting this from the Masters TARDIS." The Doctor held up a strange device. "Without this he'll be directionless, at least until he can fix it. What..!?"

The Doctor was forced to his knees by a black shroud. The Master came up to him and plucked the device from his fingers.

"Thank you kindly, Doctor."

"Raven!" The Doctor exclaimed.

"I'm afraid the game has moved on, my dear Doctor." The Master said.

"More of your hypnotic influence?" The Doctor asked. "Raven, fight it!"

"I am not hypnotised." Raven said, she couldn't meet his eye. "I am accepting my true nature."

"Raven, you're starting to frighten me now." The Doctor said, "And what's with the floating..." The Doctor trailed off. "Oh no, Raven, you didn't."

"What if I did?" Raven asked. "How long were you going to keep this from me?"

"I didn't want to burden you with it." The Doctor said.

"You didn't want to burden me with the knowledge that I am not the daughter of Trigon?" Raven snapped, "That the Monks of Azarath have used me as a vessel for their evil?"

"What's the Master been telling you?" The Doctor asked shaking his head.

"Father told me everything." Raven said.

"Father?!" The Doctor asked. "Raven, if I'd found out anything about you, I'd have told you." Raven believed him.

The Master opened the door to his TARDIS. Willard stepped inside, followed by the Master.

Raven looked into the Doctor's eyes. It took great strength not to look away.

"I killed people, Doctor." The Doctor stayed silent. "A bunch of activists on Safe Harbour. I had their lives in my hands and I ordered them to be executed, and I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it as every single one of them was put down. They were mindless, unthinking animals, no better than attack dogs wanting the approval of their master. They caused so much unhappiness. I made the call and had them exterminated." Raven swallowed. "And my... my actions led to the extinction of the entire colony of Safe Harbour. Earth Alliance used my decision as propaganda, and they killed everyone. Yet..." Raven shuddered, "I feel little for them. If I could do it all again, I would've. All for the satisfaction of feeling the life force of every, single one of those corrupt, idiotic activists wink out of existence one after the other." Raven tried to remain stone faced and stone cold, but moisture still collected around her eyes. "I... I am evil, Doctor. I am evil, and I can't escape that."

"Raven..." she froze his tongue. She didn't want to hear his voice, nor his moral arguments. Nor his condemnation of her behaviour. She especially didn't want him to raise his voice at her again. That would hurt her, and she was tired of being hurt.

"You lied to me, Doctor." Raven said, slowly she took the TARDIS key from under her broach. "You said I could be good. That there was nothing stopping me from being good. You gave me hope." She shook her head, her eyes red with unreleased tears. "I wish you hadn't."

She held out her hand. She tipped her palm so the TARDIS key dropped to the stone floor.

"Don't try to follow me." Raven warned. "If you do, I will kill you." Still holding him down, Raven walked past the Doctor and boarded the Master's TARDIS. The Doctor struggled and twisted around enough to see Raven staring at him as she closed the door.

Her hold on him was released and the Doctor stood up just in time to hear the familiar wheeze and groan start up.

"Raven! RAVEN!" The Doctor called out as the Master's TARDIS faded into the time vortex.

"Oi, Sunshine!" Ace called out in the dark cave. It was hard to navigate in the spooky gloom, but she was finding her way. She'd found more bubbles in the walls as she walked, which painted a more and more of a vivid picture of the girl who's head she was trapped inside.

Ace thought she'd had a rough childhood growing up in Perivale. But she was never thought of as 'evil.' A trouble maker, a misfit maybe, but never evil. After the seventh memory, Ace sighed. Didn't Raven have any good memories? This Azarath place sounded awful.

She did find one bubble. This one glowed a soothing blue and featured a dark area in the middle of a field. Raven was with a taller man in a green, velvet frock coat. A police box was in the distance parked under the branches of a dead tree.

"So that's what you changed into next?" Ace said.

The Doctor was laying in the grass in his frock coat, looking up at the stars. Ace didn't know where they were in the Universe, but there were billions and billions of stars in many pretty patterns. Wisps of green and red nebula made the place look like a painters canvas. Raven didn't seem to appreciate this beauty though as she was too busy sitting with her head in a book, reading it from light that came from her eyes.

"See up there." Said the Doctor with a soothing, English accent. "That's Prioximi Major and Minor, they form the parabola that makes up the great Pan-Dimensional Liquid Beast from the Mogadon Cluster." Ace had to admit she missed the Scottish tones of the last Doctor and his rolling R's. Raven didn't seem to pay the Doctor any attention.

"Doctor," Raven said firmly, "I am here to keep you out of trouble. Not listen to your pointless lectures."

"The show will be starting soon. I promise." The Doctor said.

"Yipee..." Raven said flatly.

"Look!" The Doctor pointed upwards. "It's starting."

A shooting star fell from the sky. Raven sighed deeply, turned off her eyes and glanced up at it. A few shooting stars came. Not finding anything interesting she turned her eye-lights back on and went back to her book. While she had her head in her book Ace could see the show in the sky was just starting and Raven was missing it. After a little while the Doctor nudged Raven. Irritated she shut off her eyes and looked up again.

Raven was captivated at the meteor storm. The sky was dancing with lights. An ethereal glow came over the sky, it was like the northern lights as streaks of purple, green, yellow. Ace thought it was like a fireworks display, but a million times better. Raven caught the Doctor glancing at her and quickly her head fell back to her book. But she didn't switch her 'eyes on.' She raised her brow so she could watch the light show. After a while she relented. Laid back in the grass with the Doctor and just watched.

The lights eventually faded and the show came to an end.

"What did you think of that, Rae-Rae?" The Doctor asked. Raven instantly shut her eyes as he turned his head to look at her. Her nose produced a snap-snore like he'd just woken her up.

"Did you honestly sleep through the whole thing?" The Doctor asked.

Raven blew a dismissive hiss of air out of her mouth to indicate boredom. The pair got up and walked back to the TARDIS. Raven looked back up at the star-filled sky, it was subtle, but she was smiling.

The bubble faded.

Ace laughed, not out of humour, but was more a relief that this girl wasn't a walking sack of bad memories. There were a few more soft, calming, blue memories and they all involved the Doctor. Actually a few were of, who Ace assumed was, this Russel guy she had talked about.

One memory in particular about the boy was painful. Ace could feel it. There was a black haired girl, and Raven's rage followed. She felt Raven's mind describe the girl as a 'thief.' But it was followed by sadness as the boy was left prone on the ground and he faded off into the distance.

Another memory was of a very cold, sad blue. She was sitting with some sort of crying hillbilly type person trying to explain to him why he shouldn't die.

The following one was icy grey-blue, and was an image out of a Lovecraftian horror, tentacles and all.

Then next one was red and showed Raven as a force of nature, fire in her eyes going after a large woman.

Another was blue again. Cybermen marched through steel corridors. A boy, maybe twenty or so, stuck halfway through some twisted cyber transformation.

Then a warm pink and showed the taller woman again. Raven's mother Ace assumed. Raven was much shorter, maybe ten years old. There was no sound, but there didn't need to be. The girl was smiling as mother helped her with something. The memory then shattered, but did not break. It carried on, but the three shards left the memory skewing at the fractures.

Ace came across something new. A bubble that couldn't decide if it wanted to be blue or orange. It showed Raven in her monks robes hiding under a bush. The memory kept flipping to subtle differences. Watching it a few times gave Ace the impression that these were two similar memories that overlapped. The blue one was of Raven saving a baby that was falling down some stairs, and the mother finding Raven and berating her despite saving it.

The alternative telling was Raven pushing a crying baby over the edge with her powers, the mother catching it in time, then coming over to Raven to shout at her for putting her baby in harms way. Raven rolled her eyes, like she didn't care. When the woman retreated she smiled a creepy smile.

Wow, Raven is either a saint in disguise, or a heartless, evil bitch. Ace thought to herself. Depending on which version is true.

Ace didn't' dwell on this oddity and just moved on.

The next bubble was really flipping out-there. Ace couldn't even see what it was of as they all seemed to blend together, and the bubble itself looked much thicker. There was also a thudding noise like something was trying to break out of it. The thudding was to the count of four before repeating.

"Oi, Sunshine, where are you?" Ace called again. There was an open cavern to the left of her. Beyond was a large space with a dead tree in the middle catching light from some opening in the ceiling. What Ace saw swinging from the branches by a rope sent her into bounding up to it.

Grey Raven had strung herself up by the neck from one of the branches.

She was still.

Ace rushed up to her and lifted her legs up to take pressure off her neck. Her legs were so cold.

"Can't I die in peace?" Grey mumbled. Ace paused, and hesitated before letting the legs go. Grey Raven dangled limply from her neck, but she was apparently not dead. Which made sense, she was a core aspect of Raven's personality after all.

"Come down from there." Ace said like she was addressing a child.

"No. I want to die. I hate myself." Grey looked down at her. "Help me die. The world would be so much better if I was dead." Ace stood on a stone, the one Grey had presumably stepped off from, pulled Grey towards her by her belt, took the rope and slid Grey out of it. Her body fell limp to the floor. If she were a real person she'd have suffered some nasty injuries to her back.

"Hey, so you had an argument with your mother. Big deal." Ace guessed, stepping down. "We've all had arguments with our parents before. I even hated my mother, I hated her for years."

"Why?" Raven asked.

"Well, she named me Dorothy for a start." Ace joked, forgetting that Raven didn't do jokes. Ace sat beside her. "Sorry, I'm not sure how to connect. I'm thinking of all the nasty, negative emotions I've felt." Ace wondered what I'd be like to strip away everything positive about her life and left just the negativity.

"May I see?" Grey Raven asked, sitting up and raising her hands a little.

"How?" Ace asked, then shrugged, it was probably something like the Vulcan Mind Meld or something. "Sure, if it'll make you feel any better."

Grey sat up and put her fingers around Ace's temples. It wasn't an unpleasant sensation, but Ace was regretting it as a lot of dark memories were kicked up. Mike Smith, a hunk of a man from the 1960's. She'd liked him, but quickly grew to hate him when she found out he was working for the Daleks, and later discovered some of his views clashed very badly with hers. She still went to his funeral.

The Doctors manipulation, first taking her back to Perivale, to a house she'd burnt down as a kid. Then at Fenric where the Doctor almost destroyed all faith she had in him.

Ethan Amberglass, a mathematician she'd had a sexual relationship with for a while, but he died of a brain tumor. Some days she missed the stubborn, pig headed bastard.

Then came the thing that ultimately made her leave the Doctor and Ace tried to pull away, but not before Grey caught a glimpse of it.

Greys hands fell gently. She looked calmer and more at peace.

Ace took a deep breath to clear her head.

"Feeling better?" Ace asked. Grey Raven looked up into her eyes and nodded. "Brilliant. Come on then." Ace got up, dusted herself down and as she looked around she realised where they were. This wasn't just a random cavern with a tree in it, and Grey hadn't picked this place to hang herself for no reason.

They were in a grave yard.

The headstones were identical in shape, and each had an inscription.

'Generosity.'

'Cruelly taken from us.'

'Died age Nine'

The next one along read.

'Love'

'Died of a broken heart.'

'Age fourteen.'

.

'Care'

'Gone, but not forgotten.'

'Died age ten.'

They were all starting to make a sort of weird sense to Ace.

'Charm'

'Aborted'

Ace stumbled and nearly fell into the nearby, freshly dug grave. She gazed into the black, bottomless pit. The headstone revealed what aspect of Raven was expected to die next.

It read.

'Hope'

'There was never any.'

To Be Continued...

Authors Notes: Hope you all enjoyed the new chapter. All reviews are welcome. :D

Ethan Amberglass was a character from one of the BBC Seventh Doctor books that I just wanted to include because I enjoyed the book.

The Grave-Yard idea with dead aspects of ones personality comes from an episode of Red Dwarf I think was called Psi-moon.

-TimeLordParadox

Edits:

16th March 2023: Removed Purple Raven as I've altered how the story will progress. So Purple Raven was no longer needed.