Wow! Two reviews already!
Kiue Jin- Thanks! I'll try and see if I can expand the length of the chapters, though I can only push my brain so hard. :3.
almostinsane- I'm glad you're enjoying it so far! I shall try and uphold the art of comedy.
2.) Steal a Dark Council member's hidden cache of cookies. All of it.
After getting used to the issue that Thanaton had somehow come back from the dead, Darth Marr soon received an incoming message on his holocommunicator. Sighing, he withdrew it from his pocket, mashing one of the buttons with his finger, reminding him that he really needed a new holocommunicator, until a holographic image of Darth Ravage appeared.
"Marr! What in the Force have you been doing? Sixteen calls from your quarters. Sixteen. Do explain yourself."
Ravage seemed rather irritable, causing a smile to play on Darth Marr's lips. At least he wasn't the only one suffering. "You can thank Darth Thanaton for that. He seems to have been rather taken by my personal belongings."
"Darth Thanat-?" The features of Ravage morphed into a visage of utter repulsion and anger. "Is this a joke, Darth Marr? Thanaton is dead. I saw it myself when Darth Nox killed him. You even chastised me about his foolishness."
"Words that I regret already. Alas, the Emperor has managed to return him from the grave. Did you get a note like I did?"
"As a matter of fact, Marr, I did. Whatever punishment you've received involving Thanaton cannot be worse than what I'm sitting through. Vowrawn and Mortis are with me as well. Apparently, the Republic found it humorous to torment us with all of their victories. We've just arrived to the point where they utterly humiliate Kilran."
"Worse than Thanaton? Hmmm..." Darth Marr lapsed into a state of recalling what Thanaton had been doing before he received the message.
Thanaton was rifling through his sack, as after some therapeutic sessions with electricity convinced Thanaton that moving to the Republic wasn't in his best interest, and was now placing Darth Marr's stuff back where he found them. Well, almost.
"Hey, Marr!" Thanaton exclaimed as he withdrew a lightsaber hilt. A hilt involving Ajunta Pall to be precise. "I wonder if this still works!"
If there was one thing Darth Marr had learned, it was to never touch the inviting object on the pedestal in the center of a large chamber. Sometimes, the object still worked after tripping some perilous traps and rusting away for millenia. As it so happend, the blade of energy hummed to life the instant Thanaton willed it to. Giggling, he swung it about, smashing some things he had managed not to place in the sack.
"Thanaton..." Marr began uncertainly, a bad feeling pricking at him, as irritation flicked across his features, for his artifacts were being destroyed before his eyes.
"What? I'm not doing any permanent damage!" As it so happend, the moronic Darth tripped and fell, impaling his eye onto the lightsaber. Fortunately for Thanaton, and unfortunately for Marr, however the Emperor had managed to bring Thanaton back to the living, apparently still lingered, as he rose relatively unharmed. "Ha! My awesomeness remains unperturbed!"
Marr simply shocked him again.
"Darth Marr? Did you hear me?" Ravage's impatient voice broke Marr's relapse and he shook his head, glancing at the holographic image of Ravage.
"Hm? Can you repeat what you were saying? I was entertaining myself with the memory of Thanaton being in pain."
"I stated I was coming over to Korriban. Dromund Kaas is a bore, and I think I can afford to leave Vowrawn and Mortis to being humiliated."
"I could do with some company, excluding Thanaton. Shall I prepare something to eat?"
Ravage's features brightened. "Are you suggesting we eat more cookies? You know they are simply irresistible. They had an effect on Baras, definitely."
Marr rolled his eyes at this. "I'll only bring out a few. So, hopefully, we don't chew through the entire cache."
"Excellent. I shall arrive within one solar cycle."
Marr switched off his holocommunicator and waited for his fellow Council member.
Ravage arrived within a few hours, attempting to look as dignified as possible. Marr waited in the entry hall, his arms folded, deciding it would be better to meet Ravage before Thanaton.
"Darth Marr. It is a pleasure. Shall we visit your quarters?"
Marr unfolded his arms as Ravage simply walked past, not waiting for an answer. Striding up beside Ravage, Marr kept pace with him as they made the brisk journey to Marr's quarters. They entered, finding it to be an utter wreck. Ravage turned to face Marr, one of his eyebrows quirked.
"Thanaton?" He asked.
"Thanaton," Marr replied, simply. As it so happend, Thanaton chose that moment to appear. Yet again, he wore his idiotic smile and bade Ravage hello. Ravage simply looked at him with contempt, before sitting on the only functional chair left.
"Shall we have those snacks now, Marr? I have been wanting to eat them for some time."
"Of course," Marr stepped over to the counter where he had laid out the cookies. Mysteriously, the platter was empty with naught but crumbs. Bristling with such rage, that Ravage could practically feel it, Marr turned to Thanaton. "Thanaton, did you eat all of our cookies?"
Thanaton brushed some crumbs off of his robe, then shrugged. "No. Why?"
Marr turned to Darth Ravage, gesturing with his hand towards Thanaton. "I give you the honor."
"You're too kind," Ravage replied as he stood up, his lightsaber humming to life.
By the time Thanaton realised what was happening, it was much too late.
Let that be a lesson to you all. There's a reason why cookies are the food of the dark side. I'm also taking any suggestions for ways to annoy the Dark Council in reviews. May the Force be with you!