"A picnic?" I asked. He stood on my porch, winter coat firmly bundled around him, smiling.

"Sure why not?" He smiled wider, holding up the basket. "It's packed all I need is my date."

I blushed. His date? I glanced past him to see if he had anyone else with him. He looked amused. "I'm here for you, Sam. Can I come in? It's sort of cold out here."

I pushed the door wider, watching as he stomped the still clinging snow off his combat boots. He wore combat boots. I watched as he strode confidently to my kitchen and placed the basket down. He was taking off his jacket and talking.

"... I know it's the middle of winter, but why should a picnic be exclusively a warm weather activity?" Daniel said, as I walked into the kitchen. He was taking out plastic forks and knives, two plates and a few containers.

"It's cold outside."

He looked up and smiled again. "I know. That's why I brought a thick blanket."

"We are really eating outside? On the snow?"

"Well not on the snow. I think you still have the folding lawn chairs from when Jack had his little BBQ here in August. We will sit on those," Daniel said, putting some food on the two plates. "If it gets too cold, we can move inside."

"I have to admit, I have never been asked to a snow picnic."

"Well now you can say you have," Daniel said, balancing the plates and tucking the blanket under his arm. I set the chairs up, kicking some of the snow off the deck, as Daniel gave me one of the plates.

He sat down and sighed. I looked at him and wondered what was wrong, but the way he sat and stared around my back porch, I knew it was not one of hurt or worry, but rather a content, satisfied, almost like he felt he was finally home, sigh.

I sat next to him and we began to eat and talk. We talked about the latest discoveries we each were working on, how our house cleaning endeavors were going, how I was finding time to rebuild part of my motorcycle and how he was beginning to write more academic, non-classified, articles to begin to merge back into academia. A few friends who had seen him a while back had asked if he was doing anything interesting or important, and he really wanted to contribute to his field, even if he had to omit much of what he knew was fact. We laughed as we recounted what we were doing before SG-1 and the Stargate project had called us both. It felt like the early years when we were still just learning about each other.

I shivered a bit as Daniel took the plates and set them aside. Daniel shifted the blanket from the back of our chairs to my shoulders. I blushed and looked away as I noticed how his blue sweater matched his eyes. The observation was innocent; the feeling that I felt when I noticed was not.

"You look beautiful, Sam," Daniel said softly. I glanced back at him and saw a soft smile on his lips. "No matter where you are, you are so beautiful."

Another blush was creeping up my cheeks. Daniel never said things like that to me before. "Thanks," I said, trying to still my sudden pounding heart.

It had begun to snow, and now the wind shifted, sending some flakes on the blanket. He brushed a wayward snow flake off my eyelid and seemed to want to say something else. I looked at him, ready to hear his next words, not wanting the flattery to stop. Not since Pete had I been told I was beautiful. Instead he said something words could never describe...

He pushed me deep into the snow that was now suddenly swirling, swirling, faster and faster, a blizzard falling around me. He came through the snow and glared down at me, laughing at me... suddenly aiming his weapon at me.

I woke with a scream, tangled in the sheets of my bed, at the SGC, sweat clinging to my body, and tears rolling down my face. I scrubbed my face and yanked the sheets, kicking them off from around my feet. I stumbled to the bathroom and leaned into the sink, willing my legs to stay under me. I stared at my reflection, knowing my red, puffy eyes would be hard to conceal.

I turned and sank down to the hard tiles of the bathroom. My dream was not real - never could be real - I kept telling myself. In reality he had kissed me, not tried to kill me. I hugged my legs against my chest and tried to hang on to the kiss even as my dream overtook my mind.

Daniel had fallen into the abyss and I wondered if I had glimpsed a part of it.