A/N: As requested, I've attempted to give you your Ryo scene Zorra, pain in my ass that he's turned out to be. I knew he had too much fun in the last chapter. So no jealousies for this next line. Kay, you are my Shin-loving counter-part! I had about half of this chapter hand-written; when I read your review, I finished the rest, much to the detriment of my Saturday Plans ^_^. Sadly, I can't really touch on any of your points/comments/curiosities without giving spoilers, one way or another.

Chapter five, three weeks later then I'd intended. Sorry guys; I really am trying to be somewhat regular with this story's updates.

Secrets: Chapter Five

By Valandra

"Awfully long time to just drop his bag off." Ryo just arched a brow at Touma, but he held his tongue for a minute. Granted, it wasn't the worst question they could have thrown at him upon his return. Especially since he'd been ignoring them since he'd gone upstairs.

Resuming his previous seat, Ryo hummed in agreement. "It was a long drive, and a longer day. He's turned in already." Various sounds and reactions of disappointment and disbelief resulted.

Nasuti cleared her throat and looked towards the young raven haired boy, a touch concerned. "Was he alright with the room?" She hadn't been worried about giving the red-haired youth his own room until that moment. She'd rather thought Shin would appreciate it.

"Aa," Ryo nodded once, setting his drink aside. "Though I bet he'd be down at the lake right now, if he had the energy." He looked towards Seiji and Shu, knowing they had explored the area more then Touma would have. "Was there any natural water in that city?"

The two shared a look before shaking their heads. "None," Shu verbalized, before Seiji added, "I had thought it was odd that he'd move so far from the sea his family guards. After Shin left this morning, I asked Shu to feel for any body of water."

Shu nodded once, expression a cross between displeased and disgruntled. "Nothing more then man-made pools and fountains. Don't know how he's managed an entire year there."

Ryo nodded once, gaze drawn back to his veggie rolls. 'Thought as much. That explains the pure longing and exhaustion in his eyes when he looked out at the lake. I wonder….'

Minutes passed in silence, and Ryo realized just how quiet it had grown. ~Leave him be guys. He'll be down for breakfast, so just let him rest.~

~You're not going to share what you two talked about?~ Seiji asked, in-lue of agreeing or even acknowledging the order.

~No,~ Ryo agreed with a small incline of his head. ~If he'd felt comfortable with you,~ he directed to all three. ~Then he wouldn't have waited until we were alone to talk.~

"Now," Ryo stood and made a point of returning to verbal speech. "Unless you need help with anything Nasuti?" He looked towards the older woman, who just smiled and shook her head. "I think I'll follow Shin's example. Night guys." He started towards the door. "Touma, I'll burn your books if you wake me up at three with a reading light." He sounded far too chipper when he said that; he didn't look back.

oOo

~I don't know guys, maybe you're jumping the gun here. I mean, wasn't his mother supporting him in an apartment in Tokyo for school the year the wars started?~ Touma questioned, looking towards Shu. After silently assisting Nasuti with cleaning up, she'd bid them good night as well, though she had retired to the study rather then her bed. The three young men were currently spread out in the living room.

~Yeah.~ Sitting on the floor, leaning against the couch with an arm resting on a cushion, Shu nodded once. ~She was. But why switch half-way through? And so far?~

~Well, maybe he had a part-time job that the war cost him, so he couldn't afford to stay in Tokyo?~ Touma suggested, despite the flat look Seiji directed at him.

~He was too young Touma, no one could legally employ him. I highly doubt he free-lanced like you've done.~ Seiji countered, faintly amused when the bluenette simply shrugged.

Shu chuckled, more obvious in his amusement. ~Yeah, so good of you to "help" your "big brother" out.~

Again, Touma shrugged. ~Hey, it worked more often then not. Still does.~ At Shu's questioning look, Touma smirked. ~Higher teck-related problems. Some people are touchy about someone half their age knowing twice as much. …Easily.~

Seiji sighed after a minute. ~We've strayed from the topic,~ he pointed out, earning a nod from both boys. ~To answer your question Touma, I don't know. It seems to fit, the pieces fall together, no matter how out of character it is for him. Did you see those teeth marks?~

Touma sighed and brushed his bangs back out of habit, only to have them fall right back into his face. ~Honestly? No, all I saw was a deep redness. Like I said, it looked like a hicky to me. Regardless though, it doesn't mean he's selling himself.~ Releasing a heavy breath, Touma stood and shook his head. ~I can't believe I let you convince me of that. He's been brought up better then that, and you both know it. Of the four of us, he knows and understands best, where you're coming from Seiji, in terms of tradition and proper etiquette and behavior.~

The two still weren't convinced, though Seiji did look a touch more thoughtful. Shu however, was frowning. ~Breeding and being raised proper, doesn't matter if you don't have any other options.~

Touma just rolled his eyes. ~I'm sure it didn't come down to that. Did either of you even bother asking him who he was meeting?~

~He said a friend, but….~ Seiji trailed off, his heart giving an oddly sick beat beneath the look Touma pinned them both with.

~And of course, neither of you trust him.~ Touma shook his head again, this time disappointed. ~No wonder he was cold to you. I'm going to bed now, before either of you plant any more bad ideas in me. Night.~

~Night,~ the two returned, though Seiji's was slightly distracted. Shu shifted on the floor to look up at the blond. His curiosity spurred beneath the elder's thoughtful expression. ~What is it?~

Blinking, Seiji focused his lilac eyes on Shu's darker orbs, a faint frown upon his lips. ~What if I am wrong, and it wasn't a buyer he was meeting, but a boyfriend?~

Shu's eyes widened marginally. ~His mother's an absolute sweetheart, she loves him!~ he protested.

Seiji just smiled sadly. ~Yes but…who else would have raised him in the traditions? Didn't you tell me he lost his father at a very early age?~

Eyes narrowed with an unhappy frown, Shu nodded once. ~Yeah…but his brother-in-law decided to married into the family. The family line will continue, so what does it matter? Disowning him doesn't change things in her favor!~

Seiji just shook his head. ~"Decided," but things change Shu. He may have decided to take Shin's sister to his own family, instead. The family line would fall back to Shin's shoulders. But even if he did marry into the Mouri line,~ Seiji continued, shaking his head. ~It is about appearances as well. If it were to look like his sister's husband married into the family, because he refused to carry the line, it would bring shame to the marriage, and the resulting line. While there would be no shame if he were "incapable," sexual preferences are viewed as a choice.~

Speechless, Shu just sat there, staring up at the blond. He snapped out of it when the blond looked away; Shu growled faintly. Standing up, he grabbed Seiji's wrist and pulled the startled boy up to his feet, then dragged the older boy behind him, towards the stairs.

~Shu?~ Seiji questioned, beyond startled and surprised. And a touch uncertain.

~We'll talk to Shin tomorrow. Right now, we're going to bed.~ Though his tone was calm, it was obvious he was still agitated. ~No point in dwelling on "what ifs."~

Staring up at the back of Shu's head, Seiji smiled after a moment.

oOoOo

Ryo bolted upright on his bed, trembling hands clutching the sheets and comforter at his waist. Drenched in sweat, his bare chest heaved as he hunched over, gasping in desperate breaths. Normally brilliant, tiger-blue eyes were darkened to an almost midnight shade, reminiscent of Touma's own. But the only thing on Ryo's mind, that those eyes were seeing, was Arago's trademark blue-white lightening. His entire body burned and his mind ached as if he'd been cocooned in the evil energy for hours on end.

Drawing in a semi-steady, deep breath, Ryo held it for a moment before slowly releasing it. Relaxing his shoulders, he forced his fingers to uncurl and, after another moment, he slumped where he sat. Brushing a hand through damp, dark hair, he sighed. 'Nightmares…. I haven't suffered any so vivid in over a year. Vivid and realistic and so familiar….' Shivering, Ryo slipped from the bed and walked over to the double doors that led out to the balcony. 'But…at least it didn't hold the same sense as the visions that used to assault me. No,' he thought, opening the door just enough to slip out onto the balcony. The cool night air sent a shiver down his spine as it dried the sweat still clinging to him.

'No,' he continued, folding his arms on the railing so he could lean forward and stare out at the moon and star-lit field. 'This was more like a memory. Like the Cave…the Lake…even that forsaken orb into Space.' A sound, mixed between disgust and horror, escaped Ryo as he shivered. 'Definitely more like the spirits and the energy-orb. But Arago's lightening…. I remember Sh'ten once mentioning the demon favored it for a punishment. That after so many centuries, the demon felt such extremes were necessary for his point to be truly impressed upon the Ma'Sho. Makes sense, I guess. Receive the same beating for so many years, you grow accustomed and tolerant to it….' Sighing, Ryo shook such thoughts off and looked beyond the field and away from the forest, towards the lake. Judging by the moon's position, he guessed it was a little after midnight.

'A year away from your element…how have you managed Shin? Such strength…the others may have seen it as a weakness, I never thought to ask…but of the five of us, you had the greatest disadvantage. And still you held your own, and then some. Air surrounds us, Earth beneath our feet, the sun and moon's Light, even the sun and summer's Heat, before I learned to tap into my own body temperature. Water however…we only had a handful of battles, in which you could physically connect with your element. Unlike the rest of us, you had to rely on feeling, on sensing your element, and praying it was close enough to lend you support. And still you never wavered, never once complained or even vented frustration over this fact. You were never resentful either….'

Sighing once more, Ryo looked away from the night sky and frowned. There was movement down near the lake…. Ryo released a breathy laugh. 'From my thoughts to reality,' he thought, vaguely recalling it as something similar to a quote he'd heard in class, though from what he couldn't recall. Without looking back, he straightened and grabbed the railing before jumping it and climbing down. He dropped the last few feet, impatient, his blood humming with an excitement not entirely his own. 'Even considering your exhaustion Shin, I can't say I'm truly surprised.'

oOo

Shoes and towel left behind on the deck, and his worries back at the manner, Shin dove into the cool lake water with a relish and relief that rivaled what he'd felt seeing Ryo whole and hearty. Three minutes immersed in his welcoming element, Shin's thoughts were naught but for his spirit's relief. When he resurfaced, he swam a few laps before rolling onto his back to simply float. With his eyes closed, ignoring the pitch-black river of stars above that used to taunt him, Shin felt himself start to truly relax as his nightmares' grip released him.

"A little late for a swim isn't it? Even for you." With a startled sound, Shin shifted and twisted until only his eyes were visible on the water's surface as he faced the voice's source. Seeing Ryo, he sighed and relaxed, and gave the boy a flat look.

"Not really," he shook his head, kicking his feet so that his shoulders were above the water's surface. "I couldn't sleep through her calling," Shin shrugged.

"Aa," Ryo sounded. Sitting down on the deck's edge, pajama pants rolled up to mid-thigh, he dropped his feet into the water as he watched the red-head. "Here I thought you might have been having trouble sleeping…for other reasons."

Fighting off a frown, Shin gave the raven-haired boy a curious look. "What do you mean?"

Ryo sighed and gave the other a droll look, his head tipped to the side. "I know what it's like to suffer nightmares Shin. I didn't say anything earlier, but…you've got shadows beneath your eyes, and your spirit's exhausted. …For more then the need of your element." He paused for a moment, knowing his words might start an argument. "Shu told me there's no natural water in your city."

Shin tensed and looked away. Ryo felt a moment's regret; he hadn't come out here to start a fight or to spoil the mood. But Shin looked back at him before he could consider apologizing. "You're right, of course." Ocean-colored eyes narrowed faintly, keeping Ryo's gaze trapped. "What did you pick up on?"

Eyes widening faintly, Ryo shook his head. "All I remember is Arago's lightening." He felt Shin's relief before the red-head tightened his shields, as if remembering Ryo's heightened sensitivity to him, causing the darker boy to frown. "Shin…the three of you never really had time to talk about your captivity…." He sighed when Shin looked away, and thought better about his almost suggestion to talk to Shu and Seiji about it. "You know I'll listen, if you don't want to go to either of them. We've all suffered nightmares about that summer Shin."

Releasing a heavy breath, Shin dropped back to float once more; this time, he kept his eyes open and stared up at the night sky. "Thank you Ryo, for what you're offering," he said at length, his voice soft, quiet. "But I've already shared these terrors. Some things just don't go away so easily."

It was on the tip of his tongue to ask "with who," but Ryo refrained. It was his right to be concerned, but not to be so nosy. Not to mention the fact that his concern and protective tendencies as both leader and friend were spiked…. Struggling against his instincts, Ryo eventually slumped a bit and stared at the floating youth. "No, they don't," he agreed. "But being with those that understand makes it easier."

Before he could assure Shin he wouldn't say anything more to pressure him, the red-head laughed. It was a quiet, inoffensive, almost sad sound. "Indeed it does," Shin sighed, his voice growing quiet. "Indeed it does."

There was a hint of longing in his words. 'What am I missing?' Ryo wondered, frowning. After a few minutes of silence, he shrugged and silently stood. Deciding he didn't like the melancholy atmosphere that had fallen over them, he slipped out of his PJ bottoms and jumped into the lake in only his boxers. He quickly surfaced to hear Shin spluttering and grinned.

Both boys relaxed during the resulting water war, much to their shared relief. They didn't call a truce until almost dawn. As both grinning boys dragged themselves from the water and climbed back up onto the deck, Ryo silently assessed the red-head. Exhaustion still plagued him, but his spirit was much more peaceful. He accepted Shin's towel gratefully and quickly dried himself while Shin slipped his shoes back on. Stripping out of his boxers, he pulled his PJ bottoms back on once he was dry enough, then tossed the towel back to Shin.

Only to frown when the moon-light drew his attention to the wicked scar over Shin's chest. He must have made some kind of noise, because the next thing he knew he had Shin looking at him oddly. When he realized where Ryo's gaze was, he sighed but didn't shift the towel over his shoulders to hide the scar. "We all have our scars from the wars Ryo," he spoke quietly, walking forward.

Blinking, Ryo shook his head and met the red-head's pace. "Yeah, but…. Damn it Shin, will you stop?" He grabbed the other's arm, stopping and turning him around. "I know you're uncertain and off-balance, but you've got me worried. More then that, I want to wait until you're ready to talk, but you're starting to scare me!"

Sighing heavily, Shin turned to face the raven-haired youth, his gaze sad and heavy. "I know, and…I am sorry Ryo. I came here with every intention of talking to all of you…."

"…But?" Ryo prompted when the silence drew out.

"But," Shin repeated with a small nod, his tension lessening marginally. "It's a lot harder then I thought it'd be."

Blue eyes narrowed faintly when Shin once more fell silent. "I guess the guys haven't made it much easier, either. Shin…I know you'd rather come to us all at once, but if it's that difficult…just talk to one of us. Let him share with the rest of us if you want, but just talk to one of us."

Frowning slowly, Shin tilted his head as he regarded Ryo. Several heartbeats passed before the red-head spoke, his body slowly tensing beneath the young leader's hands. "What do you know Ryo?" he asked quietly, oceanic eyes locked with tiger-blue.

"Not nearly enough," Ryo answered, just as quietly, if a touch sharply, almost…bitter. He shook his head and dropped his arm from Shin's shoulder. "I know something happened during your captivity. I know you were the first they caught, despite Shu and Seiji insisting that you joined them, not the other way around. I know that you suffered, and it's kept you from us. I just don't know what happened."

"How?" Shin whispered. On the few, rare occasions their captivity had come up, the two boys had been so stubbornly insistent on what had happened, and dead-set on what they knew, that when ever he'd tried to talk about it, they'd done little more then coddle him before changing the subject.

Ryo's lips twitched. "Now that's…not something the others have thought to ask." He sobered quickly, knowing it wasn't a good time for games. Not when Shin seemed willing to open up to him. Besides…it was a secret he'd kept from all but Nasuti for this last year. 'Just her luck to be the one to there when I woke from those first few times.' "The final battle…when each of you struck, your spirits did…something. I'm not very good with the spiritualistic, metaphysical stuff. But I saw…things, events…personal memories, from all of you.

"What really stood out to me about your's though, was that the vast majority of them involved the Ma'Sho, out of armor. One in particular, was all three Ma'Sho over you, while you screamed like I've never heard before."

Blinking slowly, looking right through Ryo for a moment, Shin sighed heavily and took a seat on the deck. Folding his legs, he shook his head and laughed quietly. Blue eyes widened with more then concern, and Ryo quickly knelt at his side, a hand once more on the red-head's shoulder. Closing his eyes, Shin quieted after a few moments and settled.

Expression still distant, Shin lifted a hand up to touch the scar over his chest. His fingers curled. "I was alone Ryo. And I was dying."

TBC