If You Only Knew Chapter 3: Meet Alice, a twilight fanfic

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the twilight characters.

BPOV

I stood there for about five seconds, thinking what do to next. Then I switched into my doctor mode. I've had some training in the newborn section of the hospital, so it was an instant reaction. I started checking Ryan over, cooing to him at the same time as a cover to other shoppers. He's pretty healthy, and there are no scars or bruises. The woman must have treated her well, I wondered, but why doesn't she want the baby?

I decided to shop around, since I was in urgent need of baby supplies. It was strange, strolling a baby around in the mall. There is first time for everything, I told myself. I was afraid people would throw me weird glances, but everything seemed normal. Everyone assumed I was a mom, taking her child out on a shopping trip. I browsed around stores with infant supplies, completed defeated. I am not a big fan of shopping for my own clothes, and now I have to buy things from my kid? I groaned, walking into another store, determined that this would be the last one.

"Hey! My name is Alice, what can I help you with? Are you looking for anything in particular? Oh! What's this cutie's name?"

Woah there, this lady is very…eager to help customers. I thought to myself. I cleared my throat, "Um…I'm looking for some clothes. And uh…do you sell infant seats?"

"Then you've come to the right place! Right this way please, these are the new arrivals, and those over there are on sale. The infant seats are in the corner. You're welcome to take a look, I'd love to stay and help, but I've still got customers over there to tend to. I'll be with you soon!" And with that, she skipped away.

Wow, she has got so much energy in her. I chose some clothes for Ryan, hoping they would be enough for now. Then I wandered over to the infant seats section. I had my eyes on one that was not too fancy, and had a reasonable price tag attached to it. These baby supplies aren't so cheap after all.

"Oh hey, let me help you with that. I'm done with my other customers. You're a lucky kid,….um what's his name?" Alice looked at me questioningly.

"Ryan. His name is Ryan."

"Ok, Ryan. So why don't you guys follow me this way to the cashier. Lauren! I thought I told you to stay at the counter! Where are you?" Alice asked a bit too loudly.

The baby started crying.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't think about the little guy. So very sorry.." Alice looked at me sheepishly.

"It's alright." I picked Ryan up from the stroller, and held him to my chest, murmuring words in a low voice to him, to soothe his emotions. I balanced him, and started walking around the shop, hoping he would go back to sleep again. It wasn't long before the wails died down, and he latched his fingers to my shirt. His eyes began to get droopy, and in a matter of seconds, went back to sleep. I walked quietly back to the stroller and pried his hands away so I could put him down, praying that he wouldn't wake up once I put back in the stroller.

He didn't wake. "Good boy." I whispered to him.

"I'm very, very sorry Miss. You see, I'm the owner of this store. We have stores in many malls, and we sell things for infants, kids, teenagers, and even adults. I usually just go and check up on them once in a while; sometimes I stick around and talk to customers too. And I forget once in a while that I should remain quiet when the situation calls for it. It just slipped my mind. I added some bottles and other daily infant supplies you may need in your bag free of charge. Please accept it as my way of apologizing." She said in a low voice, as to not wake Ryan again.

"You didn't have to do that. Ryan….well, babies are like that." I looked into the bag. Indeed there were two feeding bottles and a silicone pacifier. "This is too much! We can't accept this."

"Oh please, they're nothing really. I've always loved kids, and I hope I can help them in any way. Here is the rest of your purchase, and you infant car seat. Hope you don't mind me asking, but how did you get here if you don't have an infant seat in your car?"

I scrambled in my head to think of a reasonable answer, and at the same time, didn't want to make up any lies. "My friend helped me out. She has an infant seat in her car. I thought I had better get one before she turns to be our driver!" I said, adding a little humor to the last sentence.

"Oh, right! Of course! Have a good day then, Miss. Your son looks very much like you." Alice replied, accompanying us on our way out of the store.

As I drove home, I started thinking about everything that just happened in the last few hours. I can never thank the lady, Alice, enough for her kindness. She was a saint! I would bet that if I go into a store and start to ask for these daily necessities, people would ask the same questions she just did. Like, how come you haven't got these supplies yet? I only have to stop at another store before I drive back on the highway to get some diapers and milk powder.

When I got home, to say I was exhausted would be an understatement. Ryan started gurgling and held up his little arms towards me. I picked him up and wandered around my small kitchen now full with baby supplies. I fed him, and played with him a while on my lap. It was getting late, and since Ryan was gabbling on the way home, he was tired as well. I sat on the sofa, with Ryan dozing off in my arms, and using my fingers to look through information that the woman left in the stroller.

Ryan Swan. About 12-months-old. There was also a typed letter in the pile.

Dear Miss Swan,

I am very sorry to have burden you with my son. I love him, but under my current circumstances, I will not be able to care for him, and it is risky if he is found to have any relation to me. Please do not try to find out who I am. It is for your own good. The woman who contacted you is a close friend of mine, and she is someone to be trusted. Please do what she requests you to do, it is for the best.

Please let me thank you again for your kindness. If, by chance in the future, I am not disturbing the peace of you and Ryan, I will be in contact.

Of course, the letter wouldn't be signed. I sighed, still having no idea who Ryan belongs to, and why these women chose me. I pulled my mattress on the floor, and put some sturdy things around it so Ryan wouldn't come tumbling off the mattress. I'd have to think about the crib problem another day.

xXx

I woke up this morning, to a strange sound on my left. How in the world did this baby….? I shot up, and slapped my forehead. Right, the baby is mine. I stumbled around, and started feeding him. AGAIN.

I guess I never thought the whole situation thoroughly. I already have such a busy life, and with Edward in Chicago, things just couldn't get busier. Edward. What would he think? I was extremely thankful it was Sunday today, or else I would be over my head now. No, wait, I AM over my head now.

After doing a lot of thinking, and taking a lot of deep breaths, I finally picked up the phone and called Angela.

"Hello?" A groggy voice answered.

"Hey Angela? I'm sorry I called so early on a Sunday morning, but I kind of need you right now." I said nervously.

"No problem. I'm on my way."

This was the reason why I called Angela. I decided to break the news to her first, since she would be the calmest, and she always gets to the point, not asking unwanted questions. I picked up Ryan from the floor, and put him back on the mattress, making sure he doesn't do anything while I have a good talk with Angela.

The doorbell rang a few minutes later.

"Hey Ang. I'm so glad you could come." I let her in hurriedly. It made me feel as if I opened the door a while longer, the whole neighborhood would know about my secret.

"So, where's the fire? Or should I say….where's the baby?" Angela asked with her eyebrows raised.

"Huh? How'd you know that?" I spun around surprisingly.

"Easy. You've got unwashed feeding bottles on the counter, a stroller beside the dining table, and I think I accidentally kicked a pacifier that was lying on the ground."

"Why don't we go sit in the living room? I'm going to go get some coffee, this is going to take a while." I said, hoping to buy some time to calm my nerves.

I laid awake in bed thinking up the perfect explanation yesterday. I ran the whole conversation in my head hundreds of times already, and I really hope people won't see through my "explanation". I put more teaspoons of sugar than usual in my coffee since I needed the energy to finish my story. I walked back to the living room and handed Angela her coffee.

Angela looked at me patiently. And I started talking.

"You know that I volunteer as a social worker sometimes, right?"

"Yeah, we all know that."

"Well, while I was handling a case a few weeks ago, I came across this baby. The parents couldn't be found, and he the next stop for him would be the orphanage, since there weren't any foster homes willing to take him in. I took care of him for the few weeks, and I fell in love with him. I know that I'm pretty busy already, but I just couldn't bear seeing him have his whole life crumble around him. So I arranged to adopt him. I just took him home yesterday."

Angela smiled at me, "And what's his name?"

"Ryan Swan. " I said proudly.

"Ryan, " she murmured to herself once, then she looked up at me again, "Can I see him?"

"Sure! Hold on a second, let me go get him from his 'play pen', " I answered, making quotations with my hands.

After I handed Ryan to Angela, he used his chubby little hands to touch Angela's face. Then, he broke into a fit of laughter for no reason. I left them together for a while, and went into the kitchen to clean up. Telling Angela is probably the easiest, but once I persuade one, it gets easier to persuade the second. I felt as if a big load was taken off my chest.

"Hey Bella?" Angela stood in the doorway of the kitchen, still holding little Ryan.

"Yeah?" I walked towards them to take Ryan in my hands.

"Is there anything you still need?"

"Right, I was going to ask you about that. I haven't got a crib, and I don't think this would be the right time to show up on my dad's doorstep in Forks and ask for my old crib."

"That's no problem. I know a friend who wants to get rid of their crib because they're moving soon. It would be a big help to them actually."

"That would be great. Thank you."

"I'd better get going. I'm having lunch with Ben today. Call me if you have any problems, ok? Oh, and I could take care of Ryan for you on your shifts if you want. I like this little guy too." She offered.

"Really? I was thinking that asking around for a babysitter would seem too awkward. You don't know how much this means to me. I'd pay of course."

"No, no. I'm not accepting any money. Consider this as a thank-you for taking care of our house and myself in our college years. I never paid you back for those years." She said, as I walked her to the door.

"If you insist. It would be pretty convenient since most of our shifts aren't the same."

"When are you going to tell the others? I'm sure they will be more than willing to help out."

"I'm going to tell them this week. The news can't be held any longer. I hope I get to tell them firsthand than have the rumors start." I shuddered.

"I know what you mean. And….I know it's none of my business, but how are you going to tell Edward?" She asked as she opened the door, and turned back to face me.

"I'm still thinking about it. I'll tell him someday." I said quietly, and I made the last sentence lower than a whisper, hoping she didn't hear.

"Good luck then! Bye!" After I saw her drive off, I closed the door.

This was going to be a long week.

It seems that I was right about my assumption. No one else was as calm as Angela when I told them the news. They asked pesky, annoying questions, and I was starting to get tired of answering them.

"Where are the pictures?" "Does he cry a lot?" "How does it feel to be a parent?" "When can we see him?"

The statement I was most frightened about was, "He looks so much like you!" I get all queasy inside for some reason. For those who know me well, I think they believed my story. However, I heard some rumors going around saying that the kid was actually my own, since he looked so much like me. I couldn't do anything about it, since I really don't have any proof.

On top of all that, I still haven't told Edward yet. And a few weeks has already passed. A month and a half to be exact, and Ryan adapted quite nicely, though he was pretty fussy about the new enviornment in te beginning. I know I'm putting the "tell-Edward-issue" off, but I just don't know how to tell him on the phone. It felt awkward somehow. I would always catch the knowing glance from Angela; she knew I haven't told Edward yet or I wouldn't be acting so weird. Others just thought I was nervous being a first-time parent. Let them think that way then.

Since I was so busy these few weeks, I never had the time to check my email. I know Edward had called a few times, but I couldn't bring myself to answer the phone. What if Ryan cried during the call? Would Edward get suspicious? I thought of all the ways he could find out before I have the chance to tell him. I miss him terribly, and I would love for him to wrap his arms around me, and tell me everything's going to be alright. But I can't. He left a few messages on my phone, and those are the only things that make me feel close to him again.

"I got started today! Hope everything's good over there! I'll call you later!" Beep!

"Hey Bella. I know your busy and everything. I miss you, and I hope I can talk to you soon." Beep!

"It's me again. How come I get the feeling that you're avoiding my calls? Maybe I'm just reading too much into things as usual. Talk to you soon. Love you." Beep!

I cried during that last message.

I've lost count of how many times I picked up the phone, and started punching in the numbers I knew by heart. But I would always end up deleting number by number before I could press the call button. I'm debating with myself whether I should tell him before he comes back, or do it face to face. I like the latter better, but it would be cutting it close to him walking into my house and realizing something's different.

Otherwise, everybody's being extremely helpful to me. They volunteered to look after Ryan for me if both Angela and I are at the hospital. I was really grateful, and I couldn't have done all of this without them. Jessica was coming by tomorrow, and she was great with Ryan.

My cellphone rang again.

I checked the caller ID. It was Edward. For the fifth time today.

I groaned. I was going to have to take this one. He never calls this frequent in a week less in a day. I prayed Ryan was fast asleep.

"Hello?" I croaked into the phone.

"Bella." I heard relief in his voice. "You finally answered my call."

I was quiet, not sure how to answer that one.

"Well, I was just calling to tell you that I'm able to come back earlier than scheduled. I'll be back on Friday at three in the afternoon."

"Oh…great! Would you like me to pick you up at the airport?"

"That would be great. It's been a long—" I couldn't hear the rest of his sentence since Ryan was making sounds in the hallway. I yelled in the direction of the hallway, "I'm in here Ryan!" making Ryan know that he wasn't alone.

"Who's Ryan?" Edward asked casually into the phone.

Oops. I reacted without thinking. I shouldn't have blurted out the name Ryan. "Oh, just somebody I know. So what was it you were talking about?"

"Uh, actually it was nothing. I just called to let you know when my flight was coming in. I'd better let you off the phone." He said awkwardly.

"Ok. See you soon then."

"Bye."

I put down my phone and went to find Ryan. Aargh! This can't be happening! This is going way too fast! There are some days I wanted to pull my hair out.

I was just going to have to deal with the talk when the time comes.

EPOV

The plane was almost landing in Seattle. I couldn't wait to see Bella again. Her bright eyes, long brown hair cascading down her back….she's a beauty. However, I keep getting this weird feeling in my body ever since our last phone call.

Who is Ryan?

I kept asking myself this question. I thought back to all the doctors' names in the hospital I know, but came up with nothing. I don't remember anybody named Ryan.

I heard the flight attendant's voice come out of the speaker, letting us know that we would be landing shortly. The 'ding!' of the seatbelt sign lighting up followed shortly after.

I got off the plane as fast as I could, hardly trying to contain my excitement of seeing Bella again. When I walked out into the waiting area, I scanned for the familiar face that has been in my dreams every day.

And then, I saw her.

It seemed to be ages before she turned her head and looked at me in the eyes. For a moment, everything stood still, and the crowd around us dissipated. I saw her, and only her. We walked towards each other, closing the distance between us. We slowed down our paces when we were only an inch away from each other.

I hugged her tight. She put her arms around me, and buried her face in my chest.

For the first time in months, I finally felt at home. I sighed contentedly.

"I missed you so much." I whispered while nuzzling her hair.

"Me, too." Her voice came out muffled since her face was stuck to my T-shirt.

I felt a light tap on my shoulder. I turned my head around, careful not to move my body since I didn't want Bella moving away from me anytime soon. It was Jasper. He winked at me and said with a grin, "Aren't you going to introduce us?"

Apparently, Bella heard that because her head shot up in alarm, looking flushed and embarrassed. I laughed.

I shifted my body so I could have her facing my college roommate and his girlfriend. If I hadn't had my right arm tightly wrapped around her waist, I would have never felt her flinch as she took a look at my friends.

Before I could open my mouth to make the introductions, Alice beat me to it, "Oh my gosh! It's you! I can't believe it!" She hugged a stunned Bella, and she turned to me with an accusing look on her face, "And you! You never told me you were married! You have a beautiful wife and your cute son Ryan waiting at home for you! And you never said anything!" Alice screeched on the last sentence.

I have a SON? And how in the world did I get married? Not that I'm complaining, I would love to have Bella as my wife.

I was bewildered. I looked at Bella inquiringly, and she shrunk in my arms. She had better explain herself, because I have no idea what to say to the couple in front of us, with their two pairs of eyes currently looking at us VERY curiously.

A/N:

Phew! I suddenly got all these ideas, and I just had to type them up asap~ This has got to be the longest chapter I've put up.

Hope you guys like it!

I know some of the information about babies will be inaccuarate/unrealistic, but I'm trying my best here. Sorry if there are mistakes!

Please please review!

born2bmyself