Disclaimer: I do not naruto, however, I do own a bag of walnuts, and I would be willing to trade ;D

"It's time." Kisame's voice boomed darkly as the group gathered in the hallway, all dressed in dark garb. "Two of our members have betrayed us."

"Yes, uhn."

Deidara cracked his knuckles and grinned, an grin so evil it would scare Megatron to the point of shitting...or...spilling oil out of his tank...Something...

Slowly, slowly.. they approached the room where the woman with pink hair sat in her oversized comfy chair, a stitched man next to her on the other much larger chair.

"NOW!" Itachi roared, and they grabbed the people's shoulders, dragging them wildly into the darkened hallway and into Tobi's room, which was set up like a interrogation room. Kakuzu and Sakura were slapped into chairs and strapped down roughly, shooting betrayed glares at the people around them.

"What the fuck is going on?" Kakuzu growled, hands clenching the end of the arms of the chairs.

The straps were chakra restraints, and Sakura could feel the chakra being drained from her as she flexed her hands under the pressure of the restraints. "Yeah, guys seriously."

Hidan stood in front of them, arms crossed and eyes narrowed.

"You fucking rats. You know you know what you did."

Kakuzu and Sakura looked at eachother strangely, kinda the look that said, 'What the hell was going on?'

"What did we do?"

"The worst thing you could ever do, uhn."

"Tobi still doesn't understand why we gotta investigate them in Tobi's room..."

"Shut up, uhn."

Kisame leaned over in Kakuzu's face, shark against rag doll. The odds were hard to count out.

"You hid her!"

"When did we name it her, Sushi-man? What if it's a he?" Hidan grumbled amidst the tough atmosphere.

Kisame rubbed his blue chin thoughtfully, stepping away from Kakuzu for the moment as he pondered that idea.

"Never thought about it."

"Well...It doesn't have a penis, Uhn."

"Tobi thinks it's an it!"

The group sighed at Tobi's obviously childish answer, seeing that the remote couldn't possibly be an it and went on arguing about what the 'it's' sex could possibly be.

"Well I think it's a boy cause it goes to the television. So, the remote is like a penis, and the television could be the vagina." Deidara offered helpfully.

Sakura, annoying, balled her hands up into fists against the cold metal of the chair. "The. Fuckin'. REMOTE?"

The Akatsuki turned towards me and Kakuzu, who was currently cussing a stream of curses so bad, hidan would piss in his boots. If he had boots..

"This has all been about the remote?"

"Yeah you hid it, Uhn."

"Too get back at Itachi for hiding Kakuzu's nail polish."

"And me for wearing your fluffy robe."

Sakura's eye twitched at the memory of Hidan in her robe and she started fidgeting in her cold metal chair as if she were uncomfortable. "I didn't hide the remote."

"Then Kakuzu did!" Kisame yelled, swinging back towards the angry miser.

"I didn't hide crap..Except for Hidan's I heart Lesbo's shirt cause it was creepy. But that's it!"

"Yeah me and Kakuzu didn't hide anything. How do we know it wasn't any of you!"

Kisame, Deidara, Tobi, Hidan and Pein all traded looks.

"Cause he said he didn't." They said in unison.

This wasn't going to end well.

Hidan threw the first punch, which was followed by a few 'You bitches!' before chaos ensued and Kakuzu broke out of his chair. Then he kindly broke Sakura out, and both walked back to the front of the room. But as they were just about to open the door themselves, Zetsu kindly stepped in.

Remote in hand.

Everyone stared at him with bug eyes, so large that they could have been mistaken huge orbs of lights.

"Look at what I found in the couch."