Disclaimer: I don't own nuffin'. Cept' yer soul.
"Seduction is the way we'll have to get her." Hidan said, arms crossed over his chest.
Sakura looked at herself in the mirror, spinning in a circle and watching her red dress swish around her hips. It poofed out at the bottom a bit and only went down to her knees, but it was flattering she guessed.
She hadn't gone to a club in a long time, and though she was still suspicious of the sudden all too friendly men, she still wanted to look nice. She'd seen those chicks that went to clubs and didn't give a damn what they wore. No one wanted to dance with them. Or they just dressed really slutty and got laid.. But that was beyond her point.
Sakura inched her way down the stairs, her tall red high heels clicking against the wooden stairs and lithe legs appearing pale against the red of her dress. She had a red hairclip holding up her pink hair, with red lipstick to seal the whole outfit. She hoped that she looked good..
Itachi and Deidara were at the bottom of the stairs, one of those rare times where they got along she supposed. Deidara had his long hair down for once, headbang replaced with a sweat band and his akatsuki cloak replaced with a black t-shirt, a net shirt underneath with black skinny jeans. He looked..pretty good.
Itachi's hair was up as usual, and he had clothes on similar to Deidara's except for the necklace around his neck that looked sort of like small handcuffs being attached together.
"Hey Sakura-Chan, Uhn."
I smiled at him nervously wringing my hands together infront of me. Something was just off about all of this...
"I hope you guys don't get drunk." I said, lamely.
Itachi shrugged and leaned against the banister of the stairs, yawning before Sakura turned to Deidara, and he practically glared a hole in her back muttering something about Dango.
"Were's Hidan and Kakuzu?"
Deidara looked up the stairs.
"They're coming. Pain isn't coming, neither is Konan or Zetsu, yeah. I don't know about Tobi, I haven't seen him all day. Kisame is coming though, uhn."
Soon enough Kisame went screetching down the stairs, with black pants and a black vest (No shirt I mind you), already dirty dancing in a circle around Deidara with a bottle of sake.
"Damn. You just can't wait huh Kisame?" Itachi said, looking boredly at his blue partner.
Kisame started dirty dancing behind me after Deidara pushed him away, grinding on my leg and singing 'Man, you feel like a woman' before I punched him out. It was just kind of disturbing to have some dude up against you like that. Especially a fish boy..who normally wanked off to Finding Nemo..
Hidan rolled down the stairs after Kisame fell over, well more like Hidan, Kakuzu stomping down the stairs after Hidan who was cussing Kakuzu out with every swear possibly ever made. Everyone just sighed a bit. Them beating the fuck out of each other wasn't new.
Kakuzu didn't have a mask on for once, and short spiky hair hanging over one eye. It was dead black, the fringed strands hanging to his shoulders and shining slightly in the light. His pants where black, like everyone else, and his shirt was a black turtle neck. You'd think these guys would wear something other than black.
Hidan, of course, is an exception because I simply didn't know if he was a normal guy or not.
"Jashin, Kakuzu. You got fuckin' dirt on my shirt."
Hidan stood up and brushed off his pink tube top. He stood tall in black thigh high boots with pink laces, black daisy dukes, pink belt, pink tube top and black earrings. Everything he wore was pink and black. 'Matches my eyes' He says. The amazing thing was, no one cared that he was cross dressed except Kakuzu sometimes. Everyone only cared when the shorts got so tight that you could see his tattoos, that's what really disturbed us. Hell, we were even getting used to him walking around naked.
"Where's Tobi?" Kakuzu asked, breaking my thoughts.
Deidara just shrugged just as Tobi walked down the stairs. He was in his casual clothing, orange mask and a shirt held together by needles, green scarf and black gloves.
"Tobi needs to go to a store before we go, guys."
"What the fuck! Hell no! I want to dance."
"Tobi needs this!"
The group groaned as Tobi skipped out the door, humming the YMCA song under his breath with an evil undertone.
"Tobi, I didn't bring any money." Kakuzu sighed, shoving his hands in his pocket as he followed the overactive man. "I can't find my wallet."
Hidan started snickering as he walked next to me, Deidara standing on the other side of Hidan, pulling a familiar worn leather wallet from the crotch of his daisy dukes and shoving it in Deidara's face.
"What the fuck, uhn?"
Hidan snickered again and stuck Kakuzu's wallet back in his shorts as Tobi stopped infront of a book store, smashing his face against the glass door. The store, sadly enough for Tobi, was closed.
"That sucks Tobi." Kisame said half heartedly, looking down the street in the direction of the club, the loud music blasting from inside the large building.
"Tobi needs a bookkkk."
"We can just break in later, uhn."
"Tobi needs a book now."
"No." Itachi barked, his sharigan eye twitching. "We need to do our stuff, Tobi. Now. I can't wait."
Kakuzu looked in Itachi's direction warningly, before Hidan jumped through the glass door, smashing glass all over inside of the building.
"What the fuck, Hidan?" Hidan just got up and dusted himself off, before smiling at the group behind him and walking deeper into the closed store.
"You guys wanted to get your shit done. C'mon Tobi let's go."
Tobi jumped in the building with his hands up above his head, screetching thank you Hidan over and over again in a high voice while the rest of the group followed behind, Itachi off to search for a broom.
"You guys know they'll be wanted money to repair that door, right?" Kakuzu said quietly.
But everyone ignored the tall stitched man as Itachi swept up the glass and Deidara, Tobi, Kisame and Sakura started digging through books. Hidan just sat up on the counter, looking boredly across the dark room.
"Why the fuck do people buy these things?"
"Because some people actually learned to read, Hidan, Unlike your ghetto ass." Itachi mumbled as he dumped the glass bits into a trash can by the counter, trying not to cut his hands.
"What was that weasel boy? If you remember, I'm the fucking reason you guys got into this joint. A little respect, man."
Itachi just rolled his eyes and walked away to Sakura, who was reading some medical books.
Kisame leaned on the bookshelf Tobi was standing at, trying to read a book called 'One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.' It was a little bit above his reading level though..
"Tobi..Hey Tobi."
Tobi looked up at Kisame with a whine, holding a counting book in his right gloved hand.
"Whaaat?"
"What's this word?"
Kisame showed Tobi the book and pointed at the word 'This,' to which Tobi freaked out and told Kisame that it was a bad word spelled backwards.
"What word?"
"Tobi can't say Kisame. It's bad!"
"Fuck?"
Tobi gasped and fell back a bit, hands clamping over his ears.
"No Kisame! Bad word! Dont say that!"
"Is it bitch?"
"No!"
"Shit?"
"..Yes."
Kisame just rolled his eyes and closed the book as Tobi ran away. But what no one noticed was that Kisame stuck the book in his pocket, mumbling something along the lines of 'Damn hot fish in that book.' He stalked over to Kakuzu who was digging through a big book bin towards the back of the store, wondering how the hell this had turned from a night at the club to a sort of library night. Except they weren't at the library. And they were stealing the books.
"Whatcha doing Kakuzu."
Kakuzu just shrugged and murmured 'Just looking' before diving back into the bin.
Tobi walked over timidly, standing next to Kisame and looking at Kakuzu dig. It was sort of entertaining in a way, the way he looked for books.
"What are you looking for, uhn?"
Deidara was attracted by the movement from Kakuzu, Kisame guessed, and he made room for the blond man to stand.
"I..thought I saw a book with me on it."
Hidan snickered from the other side of the room at that comment.
"Like anyone would put an old fuck on a book."
Kakuzu snorted and dug in the bin again while Itachi and Sakura read their medical books. And it took awhile but eventually, everyone was gathered around the bin except Hidan as Kakuzu hollered 'FOUND IT!'
He held the cover to his face, eyes squinting at the cover. The book..was called 'Body Buddyz' and it had himself and..Hidan on it..
The components quickly added up in Kakuzu's head and he gagged slightly.
"What the fuck?"
Tobi and Kisame looked over Kakuzu's shoulder as Kakuzu flipped through the pages, before Tobi fell to the ground and let out an ear piercing scream.
"My virgin EYES!"
"Damn.. Just..Damn. I wouldn't even touch that Kakuzu, and I love porn."
Hidan raised a white eyebrow before stomping over and snatching the book from Kakuzu's dejected hands. He held it up infront of him (And the other members to see) as he flipped through sixty wonderful pages of Kakuzu raping Hidan, his purple eyes getting bigger with every page.
"Who the fuck drew this?"
"I don't know, uhn. But whoever did was a great artist. She made you guys look great."
Kakuzu stiffened the second those words came out of Deidara's mouth.
"I..I think one of my hearts just seized."