Here's today's update! Sorry if it seems a bit short! Enjoy! :)
Chapter 11
Bellamy woke with a face full of blonde hair. He opened his eyes, nearly gasping at the vision beside him. Clarke lay sprawled beside him, her head on his chest and one arm thrown across his middle.
He removed her hair from the lower half of his face, smoothing it down and away from her features. Her mouth was slightly ajar, warm puffs of air ghosting over his skin. Her face was relaxed and she seemed to be at peace.
Bellamy was accustomed to going to bed with a woman, but waking up with one was entirely new. When Clarke's eyes fluttered open, he thought the whole waking up part was something he'd like to do more often.
"Morning, Princess", he said softly.
"Morning", she replied slightly disoriented.
He watched as she looked at where she was, and then the walls were back in place. She moved away from him, one of her hands shoving the blonde hair away from her face.
"I need to get up", she said quietly.
Bellamy observed her movements, carefully and calculated. He'd seen the way she looked, the hurt that'd passed across her features before she pulled away from him. He knew that she wanted this, wanted him, but she wasn't going to allow herself to be happy.
"That's right, Princess. Run away. You're getting good at that", he bit out.
He immediately regretted it when her shoulders slumped, and she paused at the doorway. She didn't turn to look at him, keeping her gaze trained dead ahead.
"I'm sorry, but I don't have the strength to fight anymore."
Bellamy's chest tightened at her quiet admittance. The exhaustion in her words terrified him. She sounded so close to giving up, so close to falling into darkness.
He knew that Bryce was the only reason she got up in the mornings, but part of him had selfishly hoped that he was part of that reason too. Yet here he was reminding her of her past mistakes.
Without a second thought Bellamy sat up, throwing the blanket off his body. He swung his legs over the side of the bed, wincing as his the foot of his injured leg touched the cold dirt floor.
He got up, pushing down the nausea that rose in his throat as pain radiated from his injured limb. He sucked in a deep breath, his vision blurring and a cold sweat breaking out on his skin.
He pushed on, hobbling into the outer room. Bellamy found her with her back to him, her back tense as she began to prepare their breakfast. He made it to the rocker before he couldn't go any farther.
"Princess", he called hoarsely.
Bellamy watched as the blonde whirled around, her blue eyes wide. She rushed to his side; worry lining her features, as she knelt beside him.
"What are you doing? Do you want to be crippled for the rest of your life", Clarke whispered.
"I'm sorry, Princess. I was out of line in there. You had your reasons for going and I don't blame you", he said his dark eyes roving over her face.
She sighed, one of her hands gripping his own, her thumb tracing the veins in his wrist.
"I know you don't understand why I'm doing this, Bell. I don't understand it myself, all I know is that I can't hurt you again. You've got a bright future, Bellamy Blake, and I won't be the reason you give it up."
Bellamy stared at her, her words sinking in slowly. He'd thought they'd made progress the day before. For a moment he'd thought they would get past this, thought they could finally find peace.
Looking at her now, he realized that he had made headway. She wasn't backing away, she was close and he could feel her drawing closer. Her gaze was open, her walls not nearly as high as they had been yesterday.
"We'll figure it out, Princess. We don't have to understand it today, or even tomorrow, but we will. I'm here for the long haul, ok."
He watched as she withdrew, standing to pace away.
"What about Mel", she asked finally.
"Clarke, there's no hope for Mel and I", Bellamy answered firmly.
"But I saw…"
"She kissed me, Princess. It would never work because I'm in love with you. I love you Clarke, and I'll stay right here until you're ready to admit that."
Bellamy was surprised when she was suddenly there, kneeling before him once more. Her forehead rested against his, her blue eyes pained as she spoke.
"Bellamy", she breathed, "Hearing those words is… beautiful, but I'm too broken. What if I can't love you back?"
He brought his hands up to cup her face, pulling back to meet her gaze. He allowed her to see every emotion in his brown eyes, giving her an uninhibited view through the windows of his heart.
"Princess, I believe you already love me. You just won't let yourself admit it, you've painted a very dark picture. Clarke you were my light, offering me forgiveness when I didn't deserve it. Now I'm going to be yours. The only way we can get through this is together. I won't leave you to fight your demons alone", he finished with quiet conviction.
What she did next shocked him to his very core. When her lips touched his in a feather lite touch, he inhaled sharply. A jolt of electricity shot through him, and his heartbeat quickened.
Then she pulled away, her gentle hands gripping his forearms.
"Come on, let's get you back to bed."
Bellamy allowed her to help him back, laying down on the lumpy mattress and watching as she fussed with the blanket. He gripped her hand, entwining her fingers with his own.
"Do you regret it", he asked.
A sad smile curved her lips and her blue eyes met his darkened gaze.
"No, Bell, I'll never regret you."
He watched her go, settling back on his pillow and staring up at the ceiling. Outside the wind was howling, but here in this tiny cabin they'd finally found a semblance of peace.
Clarke stood before the fire, her fingers brushing over her tingling lips. It had felt so right, still felt so right. Bellamy was dangerous. He was the one person who would never allow her to fall away.
Her mother would allow her to drift away, her friends would move on, but the Rebel King couldn't let her be. He'd reached into the darkness, brightening her guilt-ridden world with his devilish smirk and warm brown eyes.
Bellamy was like the sun after a hurricane, warming the earth with its golden rays and chasing away the darkness. She was beginning to realize that there was no running from him. No matter where she went he would find her.
Clarke was so tired of running, so tired of fighting. He was strong, she witnessed his strength, had felt it. So maybe the weight of her wrongs and guilt wouldn't crush him, maybe he could help her shoulder the load.
"Momma."
The blonde turned at the sleepy voice of her son. He stood in the middle of the room, one tiny fist rubbing the sleep from his eye.
"Hey little man, did you sleep well", she asked as she scooped him up.
"Yes, where's Bewamy", the little boy asked, burying his face in her neck.
"In here, Buddy", Bellamy called out.
Clarke carried Bryce into her bedroom, setting him on the bed. She watched as he crawled towards Bellamy, sitting near the man's chest and already starting to babble.
"You boys play nice. I'm going to make us some breakfast", Clarke said as she made her way from the room.
As she seared the panther meat in the one pan, the boys' voices and giggle drifted to tickle her ears. She smiled to herself, a feeling of contentment expanding in her chest.
It amazed her how well the two men in her life got along. They were inseparable, and their little chats were quite comical at times. She could hear Bryce making up a story about the panther, and Bellamy going right along.
She shook her head as she put the meat on the tin plates, carrying the simple fare into the bedroom. She tried to hold back a grin at Bryce's look of disgust.
"Eat up, buddy. You are what you eat", Bellamy said with a grin.
Both adults laughed at the little boy's wide-eyed look, and watched on in amusement as he inhaled his breakfast.
As Clarke sat watching Bryce and Bellamy, she couldn't help the feeling of family that enveloped her. She hadn't had a family in a long time, not since her father died and she discovered that her mother was the reason.
Now what she'd wanted for so long was at her fingertips, all she had to do was reach out and take it.
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