I sat directly across from her, she was quiet and had become timid in the presence of her father. Luckily no one suspected that we had done anything, but I definitely knew Hoyt suspected that I was sexually attracted to her. Even now after getting my feel I craved for another taste. No woman had made me feel this way before, she would leave and I would never get to keep her. Even worse, she will have my child and I will never get to see them.
It irritated me that her stupid religion kept her from taking a pill that would prevent pregnancy. My only hope was that I had gone sterile from so many drugs in my life. I usually would kill my woman after I had my way with them, but in this case it was different.
"So how was your tour, love?" Pagan asked, interrupting the deep silence the surrounded us four criminals, possibly excluding Lakshmana, but I wasn't entirely sure where she stood on all this. I leaned back in my seat with a huff, one hand on the table, the other on me knee.
"It was quite extraordinary father, the best I have ever had." She replied while directly staring at Vaas, sending him an expression that truly was beyond acceptable.
"Well that's perfect darling. What did you see?" Lakshamana shrugged as Hoyt began to shuffled the poker cards. We all sat at the round table in Hoyt's office, a single light swinging onto the table that only illuminated our frontal views.
"Nothing that you wouldn't have seen in Kyrat. The only thing that made it worth while was the natives." Hoyt snorted shaking his head, he started passing out the cards.
"Natives, disgusting little fucks that do nothing good for you."
"But isn't Vaas a native? He does almost everything for you."
"Not everything." Hoyt snapped at her, causing me to scowl in his direction. My fists clenching. I might have been angered with her, but that didn't mean I would allow her get torn to pieces before my eyes. Her father didn't seem to care and that made me skeptical towards the true relationship between them. "Vaas, he works hard." Hoyt looked in my direction. "You really do... But he is young, he has a lot to learn about the business."
"Funny that's exactly why I brought Lakshmana along." We all looked at our cards for a plot second before Hoyt made his first move.
"Check."
"Check." Vaas followed.
"Check." Came Pagan.
"Fold." Lakshmana said hoarsely placing her cards down back at the bottom of the deck.
"You see she works hard at home, just like your Vaas, but she would rather party then actually do something productive." I smiled at this causing her to blush violently on her side of the table.
"It must be the age, Vaas parties as well." I just nodded to Hoyt's comment.
"I'm raising by fifty." Hoyt through his chips in, I enacted the same as did Pagan. Then Hoyt continued on with the next set.
"I never really understood what this business really was all about." She claimed softly crossing her arms, everyone looked in her direction, I sat up until my chest touched the table.
"It's about money." I answered.
"No." Pagan grinned. "It's about power. Nobody cares how much money they will get unless they are bloody poor. The power to control someone, to play god. That is the reason behind this business." Hoyt clearly made his point and was proud of doing it, he looked at his cards. "Check." I didn't even look, I just pushed all of my chips to the center.
"All in." Pagan chuckled.
"It's not about bluffing boy."
"Who says I am bluffing?" Pagan cocked his head before licking his lips and itching his ear.
"Fine then, all in." Pagan pushed the rest of his chips into the center, Hoyt rolled his eyes.
"Fold." Hoyt started putting the last set of cards out. "Oh Vaas, I wanted to talk to you about something and since your going back to north tomorrow, we can talk about it now."
"Go ahead Hoyt." I looked down at my cards.
"Those Natives are causing too many problems... I want you to go demolish anther village tomorrow. Need more room for my marijuana."
"That's cruel." Coughed out Lakshmana.
"My sister won't be too happy."
"I'm taking my cards out." Pagan said before flipping his cards to reveal a Jack of spades and an Ace. Vaas smirked smugly, flipping his cards it was two aces, one clubs, and one hearts.
"You have a sister Vaas?"
"Yes, he does, doesn't talk about her much." Vaas averted his eyes to the green felt on the table.
"I have a brother."
"Half." Growled Pagan, who looked down at his hands as he fiddled with his thumbs.
"Still I do wish I could see him one day."
"He is gone, along with your mother."
"Siblings don't do shit for you anyways." It was true all family did was make your life complicated, she however didn't feel the same and I could see it in her eyes.
"Not entirely true Vaas, my brother Damon and I still talk, we share funds with each other."
"I don't have any siblings." Mused Pagan in a brightly manner, I just flickered my eyes up to Lakshmana's and watched her expression.
"If you want to do really important things in life and big things in life, you can't do anything by yourself. And your best teams are your friends and your siblings." I broke out into a bit of giggles, everyone just staring at me.
"That's really funny Chica because I have done some great things in life and I don't need any friends, or siblings."
"The experiences you have are the creation of your personality. No wonder you have psychopathic tendencies and your sadistic." I gritted my cheek, my eyes squinted at her.
"Excuse me?"
"I am just trying to make a point, the reason you are the way you are is because you have no friends and you don't talk to your sister." I had had enough I slammed my hands on the table as I burst up from my seat.
"My sister killed both my parents and then afterwards wanted to fuck me so she could have my kid." Everyone was in shock at my sudden outburst, it was a tough life for me. Citra was my younger sister, I grew up defending her, and then she asks me to kill one day right before she murders our parents. I ran like a coward after that, nearly died out in that jungle if it wasn't for Hoyt. That is why I put up with his shit.
"I'm going. There is nothing more for me to do here." I continued, before leaving Hoyt's office. Lakshamana gave out a shaky breath, she gulped and decided to go check on me without a word exchanged.
"Don't be too long Lakshmana." Her father warned as she disappears through the double doors and slowly walked down the staircase. At the bottom she looked around, it was dark and silent, nobody was a about, the mercenaries working. She dreaded the fact that she had somehow emotionally struck me, she didn't mean to take it that far.
Within seconds he was on her, a loud thump emanated from the contact between her shoulder blades and the nearest wall. I had a knife to her throat, heaving heavily with exhilaration.
"Who the fuck do you think you are?" I spat in her face, she cowered away slightly in my arms. "Do you not realize how dangerous I can be? What harm I can implement on your skinny little body? I am a time bomb bitch, I can explode any minute and yet there you were pressing my buttons." The sharp end of the blade barely nicked her throat.
"Please don't Vaas. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."
"Me? Feelings? I don't have any, I could kill you right now and because I am so goddamned angry I would not think twice." She gazed into my eyes, I saw fear, but not of me. She was afraid of what I was saying, she was afraid of rejection. It was funny, how we had just met today, just fucked today, and here we were with these unexplainable feelings. Love was not my thing, I loved my sister once and she betrayed me, whose to say this bitch would not do the same. Those eyes though, that feeling of comfort, of calmness came over me and the blade slowly began to lower as my forehead pushed up against hers.
She made a sigh of relief before ringing her hands up to the side of my face.
"I am feeling a bit tired. Can I stay with you tonight?" She asked plainly, randomly, it wasn't an off question. This would probably be the last they had this moment.
"Sure. I will let you stay with me." I wove my fingers through hers and started guiding her to my shanty. It wasn't so much that we were craving for each other, it was more like we were exhausted and wanted to spend this moment together.
At my shanty, she removed her dress, I stripped down to my boxers and we both fell asleep in a lover's embrace on my bed. I cursed myself for letting her past my defenses, somewhere deep down inside I hated her, but then I also felt something else. An off sort of feeling, her snoring was cute and the way she took deep breathes made it sound almost sensual. It took everything I had not to take her in her sleep, the thought of doing it made me even hornier.
This was wrong on so many levels, I was a murderer and in all truth a psychopath. How could I love this woman? Was it even love? I wasn't going to count on that theory, I wasn't going to believe that love works in mysterious way because it doesn't. This woman was just here and she was of the upmost fuck material. That is what I will say, she doesn't deserve to sleep by my side, but I will give her the satisfaction... Not mine... Her satisfaction.
She woke up to the smell of bacon, which was exactly what I was making on the stove. I knew how to cook, I was making eggs and bacon and toast all the while wearing nothing while I did it. It was before the sun came up, I couldn't sleep and I assumed she didn't want her father getting suspicious. When she awoke I was surprised to find she had grabbed one of my tank tops and had migrated into the kitchen. She looked so fragile in it, it ended at her thighs which was quite exciting for me and loose on the sleeves giving glimpses of her breasts.
"Good Morning." She greeted, I began arranging our breakfast plates.
"Good Morning? Is it really?"
"For me? Yes."
"Why? You and papa are leaving today." She frowned before shrugging.
"I could stay if I wanted." I froze, making a suppressed laughter, I lifted our plates and turned making my way to the round table, I placed them down.
"Your papa will make you leave."
"My father doesn't control me, I am old enough to make my own decisions." I sat down and grabbed my fork beginning to eat, shoveling eggs into my mouth adam excuse motto answer her. She grabbed the chair on the other side of the table and dragged it over next to me. I stopped mid chew relishing in her undefined beauty. She moved her plate before sitting down. She wasn't close, but she was sitting next to me. About six inches closer and our shoulders would be touching. "When I was little, around the age of one, a man nearly killed me. In turn my father killed him before I was dead and he has always been overprotective since."
She grabbed her fork taking a bite of the egg, I just stared before continuing off my plate.
"People judge me... My sister gave me this scar years ago and I..." I emphasized the I. "Have never been the same." She chewed the rest of her bite swallowing it down, unlike me who still was shoveling food into my mouth. Nearly done with my plate already.
"I like you Vaas." I choked on my food, coughing up my biggest bite onto the plate and turning in her direction, pounding a fist at my chest once.
"Excuse me?" She just laughed, at my shocked expression. Nobody liked me, not one person could look at me and say they did.
"I..." She leaned forward until her head rested on my bare shoulder, my half erection was in full view to her. "Like you." Her silk strands over his naked skin, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
"How?"
"Because I am not looking for a man of perfection. A man who has everything wrong with him is one that can learn from it. That isn't at all self-centered when it comes to his love." What did she want with me? She wanted a full on relationship that I could not give her. I wasn't going to call her crazy because of it, when we first met I was sort of pushing her to fuck me. She knew Spanish supposedly and I didn't really know how else to solve the situation other than give her what I promised. Now she could become pregnant and it's all my fucking fault.
"You worry about what we had done. Why?"
"I can't have a kid, baby. Worst casenario I get my dick cut off because of it."
"I promise things will go well."
"Just take the pill."
"No."
"You barely know me and you want my kid."
"I wasn't expecting to do what we did."
"Then take the pill."
"Please don't make me." I weaved my fingers through her hair, holding the base of her head.
"I don't like you back..." She pulled away. "I can't." I could see the glistening tears in her eyes, what was it about me? Why me? Why did she have to fuck me? Maybe I didn't mind so much taking her virginity. It was a privilege that she allowed me to. It was an honor to have her so close and here I was pushing her away. Things were too fast, too uncertain. She didn't know me and if she did, she would be hate me, or worse... Die. I pulled my hand away and stared down at my plate, crossing my arms.
"Go home, Lakshmana. Go home and don't come back." She didn't move, I glared at her waiting for her to make her move.
"Do I at least get a kiss good bye?" She asked in a hushed tone, I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers. A final kiss, that she would always remember. Had this god that everyone praised truly given me a chance to love? Had given me... A murderer, one heart to give? I pulled away in disgust, not with her, with myself.
She left the table, dressed, and then left the shanty. It was silent as I pondered my destruction, her father was bound to find out and what would he say... I wasn't so sure of myself anymore, should I let her leave? Or make her stay.
