Neko-chan: Hey there. A new chapter is here!
Naruto: Finally!
NC: Yeah, yeah. Anyways, something really funny happened a few weeks ago. Me and my friends do this thing where we're called the anime character that we either like, or are most like. So, I decided to have a conversation with them using their 'names'. Here's the convo.
Sasuke Amanda
Naruto Jesica
Jiraiya Sage(me)
Jiraiya: Sasuke, a lot of my reviewers want me to burn you alive.
Sasuke: Oh darn.
Naruto: Ha ha!
Jiraiya: -snickers- Hey, at least he's not the one who's being molested by everyone.
Naruto: …WAIT, WHAT?! Sasuke, can we trade?
Sasuke: No.
Naruto: Darn it!
NC: Yeah, there you go. Now that you read it, I'm going to go with the story now!
The villagers were angry. Now, in the past, they would be angry because something good happened to the village 'monster' but it's been years since the young blond has been seen. Some say he was the cause of the Uchiha Massacre, which was discredited by the youngest Uchiha, who said he saw his brother commit the deed. Others said that Itachi killed Naruto after killing his clan, which was a more well liked theory.
Of course, since it's been nearly six years since they've seen the blond, this wasn't why they were angry. No, they were angry because the survivor of that massacre, the boy who was going to be the one who would rebuild one of their most powerful clans, could not participate in the Chunin exams. Why? Because they were assigned to a C-class turned A-class mission that ended with one of his teammates dieing. Really, this was Uchiha Sasuke! Why is something as minor as the death of some village nobody an excuse to keep him from becoming a chunin! It was outrageous!
"This is such a pain in the ass." Kakashi muttered as he walked right outside of the village gates. His team, which consisted of the Uchiha survivor and the co-president of said Uchiha's fan club, had the day off. It was already a given that the team with Uchiha Sasuke would be recommended for the Chunin exams, but the exams could only be taken in three man squads. Which meant, they were out.
So, he was currently taking a leisurely walk outside of the village. The tense atmosphere was getting on his nerves. It's not the end of the world if their 'precious Uchiha' couldn't become chunin that year. Geeze, all they had to do was wait until the next year. They usually distribute the failing genins into sets of three, so it was likely they could get a new team member for the next exams.
Of course, they can't wait a year. They're already quizzing the academy students to see if there's one on level with our team. I truly doubt it. He thought with a sigh. As he thought that, he suddenly froze, sensing the presence of someone near here. It couldn't have been ANBU, because they were trained to erase their presence…so who?
"Excuse me…" A gentle voice murmured. Reflexively, Kakashi pinned the owner of the voice to a tree, a kunai poised at the tanned throat.
Wide, fearful blue eyes stared at him, as if expecting to be killed on the spot, but Kakashi didn't move. "State your name and business." He said.
"M-my na-name is N-Naruto. I-I-I-I was t-told by K-Ketsueki-ojii-san t-to give this to the Ho-Hokage." The stranger stuttered. Kakashi narrowed his eyes, but he felt no lie in the statement, so he let the male down.
It was only when he stepped away that Kakashi noticed that the stranger he pinned to a tree was merely a child, about twelve-years-old. It was no wonder he was so terrified. As the child tried to recover, the Copy Nin took closer observation of him. He was a blond, with long hair that brushed his shoulders. The boy was wearing a long, plain black cloak that looked too big for his lithe form, and a large umbrella-hat, which indicated that he probably was a traveler. Kakashi noted the scroll that was tied securely to the boy's body, meaning that it was too important to let out of sight, and that was probably what the boy was told to deliver.
"Who did you say ordered you to come here?" Kakashi asked once Naruto looked assured that he wouldn't be attacked again.
"Ketsueki-ojii-san. I wanted to become a ninja, so he told me to come here with this note to give to the Hokage." The silver haired male raised an eyebrow. This was a strange time for someone to come asking to become a ninja. Usually even home-trained students would come at the beginning of the school year to apply for one year of learning in the village before becoming a genin. However, the academy already started about two months ago, and it was too late for new students unless the student had a really fast learning ability.
"Let me see the letter." The elder male said simply. Naruto looked at him skeptically before taking the scroll and handing it to Kakashi, who inspected the scroll for traps of any kind. "Come with me." He finally said, deciding that it would be best if he brought this boy to the Hokage. Kakashi didn't know why, but Naruto's presence disturbed him. He looked behind him and saw the blonde's eyes wide in curiosity as he gazed at the large village in wonder.
I must be imagining things. Kakashi thought, turning his gaze back to their tall destination. When he turned, he failed to notice the narrowed eyes and the once wide mouth closed and twisted in a sadistic smirk.
This is going to be so easy…
------
Hokage-sama,
My name is Ketsueki, and that is all I can tell you, for I do not wish for you or for anyone else to try and trace me down. I assure you that everything I am about to tell you is the complete truth.
Uzumaki Naruto has been in my care for five, nearly six, years. I had found him in the forest with a trio of men beating him and took him away after using a genjutsu on the men. Yes, I am a ninja, but that is not the point of this letter. Naruto has told me he is an orphan, so I decided to care for him myself, and he agreed. I have been training him myself, and he soon became interested in becoming a ninja himself.
That is why he is there, to become an official shinobi of his home village. He has told me that you were one of the few who has cared for him, so I pray that you will be fair to him. He has a great deal of potential, and I assure you, you will not be disappointed in his abilities, or his enthusiasm to learn more.
I should also tell you that me and many other retired ninjas will not take any offence to him sitting down. He has become a treasure to me and to everyone in this village, so many who have sheathed their swords will take them out again if necessary. This is not a threat, but a warning against any misdeeds against him.
But, other than that, I do wish you luck! This bundle of sunshine will be quite a handful, and I don't think a man of your age could keep up.
-Ketsueki
Sarutobi looked up at the two males in his office after he finished reading the scroll. The message seemed completely serious before the final comment. His gaze settled on the blond boy, who was tensed and standing there meekly, his eyes staring at the floor as he fidgeted nervously. He seemed to be very anxious as to what the Hokage would say.
"So, you want to be a shinobi, Naruto?" He asked with a gentle smile. Naruto jumped at the sudden noise and looked up before smiling and nodding, a wide grin threatening to split his face.
"Hai!" He said happily, and the Hokage's smile widened a fraction. He could sense the enthusiasm coming off the blond. He looked at the letter again and his eyebrows furrowed. Whoever this man is, he failed to mention how far Naruto was in his training. This would be difficult for the elderly man to place him in the academy.
"Naruto, do you think you can wait outside while I speak with Kakashi-san here?" He asked. The blond nodded and walked out, closing the door behind him. He sat on one of the wooden chairs by the office and closed his eyes. While he was there, he might as well plan his next move.
The note written was mostly by Kisame, since Itachi mentioned that the Hokage would probably be able to recognized his own. The blue man thought to start off serious, but to add humor into it, just so the Hokage wouldn't suspect Naruto to be brought up as some kind of emotionless weapon, even if Naruto's attitude from the entrance to the tower made that theory seem impossible. But, all in all, things were pretty much going the way he'd hoped.
Naruto knew about the team he was aiming to join, and he already knew how to do it. All he had to do was get a rumor starting that the Kyuubi vessel was back and that he was mid-genin level. He was sure that, despite their hatred towards him, they would want to add him to the team seeing as he's the only one available. They will probably go straight to the council instead of the Hokage since they all knew the attachment the man had for him.
The rumor phase was already completed. He used Kage Bunshin, a technique Itachi had taken from a forbidden scroll that he took a peek in a few months before the clan massacre, and a henge to make two, ordinary villagers. The two were sent to a shop to gossip about the 'demon vessel' returning and that 'it would be a perfect chance for the Uchiha's team'. After a few people heard, the gossip, and the idea, spread. From the information the clones gathered, the plan was to test his ability to see if he would hold the Uchiha back. Naruto nearly scoffed at that thought. If anything it will be the Great Sasuke who will hold him back. But, he made a promise to Itachi. He would break the boy, and the first thing he had to do was get close to him.
Exactly what are you planning? A certain furball wondered. Kyuubi was always slightly interested in Naruto's schemes, solely because the plans usually involved destroying someone, physically or emotionally, until there was nothing left. His jailor interested him greatly. Being a Kitsune, the Kyuubi could sense and see what humans could not. For example, he could sense the soul inside of a person, and the quality of that soul. Usually, by the time a person's ideals set in, their soul is one form. It can slowly change as the person's ideal changes, but the process is, like I said, slow. It doesn't happen immediately.
Yet, with Naruto, his soul changes form almost in an instant. Usually, Naruto's soul is in the form of a white feline, the white symbolizing purity, and the cat, playfulness, which was understandable. It stays that way even during his missions, which is why everyone is always fooled. They can't sense a lie, because Naruto convinces himself it's the truth before facing them. However, when the blond has finished leading the target to Itachi and Kisame, or he has to kill the target himself, the form of his soul changes, in an instant, into a blood-red bat. The red, malevolence, and the bat, blood-lust. Kyuubi has never seen such a change, and he was very interested in the blond vessel.
Oh, I have a lot of things planned for little Sasuke. First things first, I need to gain his trust. Naruto inwardly smirked sadistically. Oh yes, Naruto was truly a sadist, which was the reason why he enjoyed deception missions so, so much. The look of pain, betrayal, and anger reflected on the target's face was always enjoyable to him. He didn't know why, it just made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
Considering you're about a foot short for your age, I don't think you have much of a right to call anyone else little. Naruto bristled in anger at the teasing and pouted. The five hundred foot demon was always, always poking fun at his height! He was starting to get tired of his 'I JUST HAVEN'T HIT MY GROWTH SPURT' argument, and, frankly, the fox would just continue poking fun afterwards.
"Excuse me there." Angry blue eyes opened before Naruto remembered where exactly he was. The Kyuubi watched as the red bat suddenly morphed back into the white cat.
"Hello!" Naruto said to the woman in front of him, who was taken aback by the flicker of anger, which was suddenly replaced with large, cheerful eyes and a full grin. The woman couldn't help but shiver in fury. What right did this demon have to be happy?!
Calm down girl, this is for the sake of the village. Once the Uchiha becomes chunin, we can get rid of this thorn in our side once and for all. The thought calmed her down and she forced a professional face on while looking at the boy.
"Hokage-sama wishes for you to follow me. We're going to begin your testing to see where you stand in your training." She said. Naruto almost burst out in laughter right there. Who the hell would fall for such a lie? He may have had his eyes closed, but he was aware that he was right next to the Hokage's office door, and there was no way she could have been instructed to take him anywhere without the Hokage asking her to come in himself, which he didn't. How stupid did she think he was?
"Okay!" Pretty stupid…
The woman nodded and walked down the hall, knowing the demon was following her. She wanted nothing more than to smack that child silly for smiling after what he did to the village twelve years ago. How the Hokage could like this beast, she would never understand. But she knew she couldn't have the satisfaction of seeing him scream until after he's served his purpose. After that, it's open season, and the village was going to hunt down a fox.
She didn't realize that the 'fox' was well aware she was close to snapping just by being near him. She wouldn't though. That would make him mistrust her, and then he would go to the Hokage, who would tell him he never asked anyone to escort him anywhere, and the Naruto would have to go through the academy, and both their plans would be completely ruined.
"We're here." The woman said, a tiny hint of bitterness escaping her. Naruto nodded, but then he remembered the third reason he was here.
My revenge on Konoha. All right, Naruto, time to turn on the charms. He thought, and Kyuubi watched. It would be a blast to poke fun at his jailor about this later.
"Thank you." Against her better judgment, the woman looked down at the demon's face, only to step back in surprise. The blond was smiling one of the brightest smiles she had ever seen. Pure relief flooded his eyes and tears pricked to corners of them. She caught herself and grimaced. Was that guilt she was feeling?
"W-what are you thanking me for?" She couldn't help but ask. All she did was lie to him and take him to the room where the council would test him, and she was sure he could feel the aura of hatred that surrounded her. So why did he seem so…happy?
"For being so kind to me. I was scared, so very scared that people would be mean to me again when I came back, but you were nice. You could have refused to escort me, but you did anyways. I feel so happy, I can't even describe it. So, thank you. Thank you very, very much, Onee-san." He said hanging his head, the smile still in place, and she could see the tears falling. With a cheerful giggle and a wave, he disappeared into the room, leaving the woman dumbfounded outside.
What…the hell was that about?! Did that monster think, for even a second that I was willingly taking him here?! I want nothing more than to stay fifty feet away from him at all times! Ugh, that demon brat! I'm going to enjoy seeing him die! She thought angrily as she stormed off. Although her mind kept repeating that she despised the demon that took her grandparents away, her heart felt horrible that he trusted her so completely despite her ill intentions, and her soul felt refreshed from the smile he gave her.
One down, 996 to go.
---
BUWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
-twitch-
Shut up…
How can I? I can't believe you pulled out that face! I wish I could take a picture of that! It was the best yet! I suspect you'll be using it a lot, though. I am going to completely enjoy an entire mission filled with your infamous Uke Face. BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Naruto twitched again. Why, oh why, did he pull out the face when Kyuubi was awake? He knew that face was useful in turning women onto his side, and even men, when used correctly. Kisame has seen it when Naruto was nearby, trying to convince one of their targets to come into their agreed place to kill her. It was then that Naruto tried to pull of a childish form of the puppy-eyes. However, Naruto couldn't pull off childish puppy-eyes. If he tried, he would just make a face that was much, much more powerful than the eyes and the kicked puppy look put together. His lip would tremble, his eyes would water, and he would seem to have an unearthly glow around him. That, Kisame had said, was the classic Uke Face, but Naruto had turned it into an art form. No one, not even the coldest of hearts, could resist it. Except for those who were used to it, but even Itachi submitted to the power of the face, which was used to get ice cream and other various forms of sweets. It didn't work after about a week, but, boy, did Naruto relish it.
Of course, the teasing coming from both Kisame and Kyuubi was annoying as hell. He was able to escape from Kisame's jeers, but Kyuubi was inside of him, so he couldn't really block his ears and yell 'lalalalala'. He just hoped that he could get through this mission without tearing his hair out. But, he had to suck it up. The only way to gain the trust of the village was that face. It was his most powerful weapon, and he knew he would need it.
"Uzumaki-san…" A voice said, snapping Naruto out of his thoughts. He knew he wasn't alone in the dark room, but the Kyuubi was annoying him, so he didn't acknowledge their presence until the deep voice spoke up.
"Hai?" He asked, looking up in the direction where the voice had spoken. He saw five shadows seated in what looked like some kind of viewing room. It was a second later that the blond realized they were going to view him.
"We're aware that you wish to become a shinobi. However, we wish to test you, to see whether or not your will be worth the teachings in the academy." An elderly woman said. Naruto made himself look confused, but inwardly he was congratulating himself. He knew why he was here, and what she said was mostly a lie. They did want to test him, but he either shows he's not too strong or too weak, or die by their hands before the Hokage could blink. They knew that anyone would gladly take the blame for his death, the consequences being worth it for their name to be honored and for their family to live their lives loved for being related to 'such a hero'.
"Oh, okay then! When's the test! Oh, I hope it's not too hard, I didn't study." He said, acting as if he thought it was a paper test. They sneered at his stupidity, but decided to begin anyways. The sooner this is done with, the sooner he could leave.
"Your test begins now." Naruto had sensed the hidden presence in the room for quite some time, so he was ready to dodge when several kunai whizzed towards him. However, he allowed a few to graze his side, so he wouldn't rouse suspicion.
"Ack! What are you doing! I wasn't ready!" He snapped, causing the council members to roll their eyes. Did he really expect for his enemies to wait for him to be ready before attacking. Stupid demon. However, the reflex was mildly impressive. He could be promising.
Okay, dodge around a bit, a few well-placed kicks. Not too hard, though. He's a mid-chunin, I'm not supposed to be able to beat him, just make him tired. I'll give him about three hours for his stamina. Focus on speed and defense, they need to see that I have a vast amount of stamina, but not a lot of strength. That's what they are expecting. That's what they want. Naruto was deep in thought, but his body was already putting his plan into action before he finished planning it. He knew the plan, all he needed was to tell his brain of it so that he didn't screw it up.
"The vessel is fast, but, judging from the offence, he is lacking in the strength department. No wonder, considering how scrawny he is." Naruto's keen hearing picked up the insult and he held back a growl. He wasn't scrawny, he was lean! He'd like to see them try and stay burly with Itachi's torture/training! Of course, it could always just be the way the blond was built, but there was no way he was going to admit he was naturally skinny.
"I agree, but, remember, we're to kill him if he seems too strong for our liking. The speed and stamina will make it so he can hold his own, and not be a burden to his unfortunate team."
"Ugh, I wish there was another way to get the Uchiha to participate. He's capable enough to pick up the dead weight of the Haruno girl. He doesn't even need a three-man-team. We should have been focusing on his development instead of giving him to a sensei who would split his time three ways." Naruto smirked inwardly. Ah, pressure, something he could use later on.
"All right, I've seen enough. Tomi. Stop!" A man grumbled, and the chunin, much to his disappointment, stopped his assault. Sure, he hadn't hit the demon as much as he'd like, but the punches he did get in were satisfactory enough until the exams were over and the village could do what they want with the beast. He turned to inspect the damage he had done, but was surprised to see the demon already up and bouncing happily. Tomi was surprised at the wide grin and stepped back when the thing bounced to him.
"That was so much fun! You're such a good fighter, Tomi-senpai, I don't think I could ever find someone who could fight as good as you here! I hope we can do it again sometime." He said with a wide and cheerful grin. Tomi stepped back in shock, then he turned and ran out the door, causing Naruto to pout. "Aw, why did he run like that?"
995 to go. Naruto could feel the effect he had on the boy, and tried, keyword: tried to block out the Kyuubi's loud laughter as he turned to the council.
"We've decided. You are to go to the Hokage with this. You're going to be assigned to a team, who you will meet up with at ten 'o clock sharp tomorrow morning. If you do anything to upset the members of that team, or hold them back, you will be punished justly. Are we clear?" The gruff voice demanded as a scroll was dropped. Naruto picked up the scroll and grinned up at the council, deciding not to use the face on them just yet.
"Okay then! Thank you for the time!" He said and ran out. He didn't even try to hold in the victorious smirk as he got outside.
Way too easy…
NC: Yeah, the 'test' was kind of quick. That's because I didn't have too many ideas for it. And the Uke Face does not belong to me. It belongs to the genius who created yaoi. Anyways, here you go. Bye!
