…and missed them completely, running into the Fifth's conveniently placed TARDIS. A faint cackle of glee came from the inside of it, then the doors slammed once more and the ship began to dematerialise.
"MY TARDIS!" screamed the Fifth, running towards the disappearing ship in dismay. "IT'S TAKEN MY TARDIS!"
As one, the Doctors went as pale as a bleached worm.
"We've got to get after it," said the Fourth Doctor gravely from the ground. "We should be able to trace our old Type-40 quite easily, unless… quick!"
He got up hastily and ran into his own TARDIS with Romana following close behind, still clutching his scarf tightly in one hand as he opened the door.
Romana shouted back to the others, still standing motionless with shock.
"Follow us, everyone! We can find the TARDIS that thing took in no time if we all team up!"
With that, she disappeared into the TARDIS as it began to dematerialise.
The Third turned to the weeping Fifth and smiled.
"Resourceful girl, isn't she?"
The Fifth nodded and stopped crying, as it was beginning to get on his nerves.
"Are you coming or not?" shouted the Third Doctor, already halfway to his TARDIS. The Fifth nodded again and ran over. Then he jumped as his seventh incarnation's voice rang out.
"Can you come over here and hold this for me? I've nearly fixed my TARDIS."
The Fifth, inwardly resenting being told to do this and that by his other incarnations, nevertheless trotted helpfully over to where Mel and the Seventh and Sixth Doctors were standing. In an afterthought, he called over to the Third.
"Go on without me, me. I'll catch you up in a bit."
The Third immediately pulled Sarah Jane by the arm into his TARDIS, and the Fifth turned back to the Sixth and Seventh. The Seventh gave him a length of damaged wiring and turned to leave.
"As you've got to wait for one of us anyway, I think I may as well go and join the chase. I'd nearly finished fixing it, no thanks to me and Mel."
The Sixth Doctor fiddled with his bright coat and said nothing.
There was the sound of a TARDIS dematerialising.
"They'll have a head start now, and I don't want that!" said the Seventh Doctor, marching off to his own TARDIS. "We'll get your TARDIS back in no time, me!"
Yet another TARDIS dematerialised.
Silence.
The Fifth Doctor concentrated very hard on repairing the crushed wiring he had been given to stop himself from crying again. It was like losing his best friend – in fact, it was losing his best friend. His TARDIS, taken by that horrible blonde thing. He wondered if the ship was weeping silently and alone, so many galaxies from him and home.
Something wet gathered on his eyelashes and he wiped it away angrily.
"There. Done."
The Sixth took the repaired wiring from him and flashed him a quick smile.
"Mel and I would be overjoyed to have you journey with us until we get the TARDIS back, wouldn't we Mel?"
Mel nodded grudgingly.
"I'm afraid we haven't been seeing much of other people for quite a while. It'd be somewhat of a refreshing novelty to actually speak to someone other than Mel, so you're welcome to come with us."
The Fifth looked blankly at his next incarnation, his eyes fixed on the retina-burning coat. The Sixth realised his precarious mental state and sighed.
"Oh, who am I fooling? Come on, me. We're going to go and find your TARDIS."
He pulled the Fifth into the newly repaired TARDIS by his sleeve and motioned to Mel to follow them. The doors of the TARDIS, for once, did not slam but simply closed.
As the Sixth Doctor's TARDIS disappeared from view, two shadowy figures emerged from the trees.
"Hey, where did I go?" said the Eleventh Doctor in confusion. Roberta Homes shrugged.
"Doctor."
"Yes?"
"Nothing, you just said 'Where'."
"Oh," said the Eleventh Doctor. He adjusted his scarves. "So much for trying to find the rainbow that the seventh me ran towards! It's completely gone!"
"I do know, Doctor," sighed Roberta. "I was there when we found that out, if you remember."
"But where are all of me?" said the Eleventh, annoyed. "They must have run away from me! I'll have to follow them."
With a rallying cry of, "QUICK-QUICK-QUICK! Into the TARDIS-shaped police box!" the two ran into the TARDIS-shaped police box, realised that they couldn't actually travel through time and space in it and went into the TARDIS instead.
The TARDIS dematerialised.
All was quiet and still in the light-dappled woods.
Through the space time vortex the renegade TARDIS was rolling through closely followed by many TARDISes in battle formation. Unfortunately Rose had mastered control of the TARDIS and knew exactly where she was going. The TARDIS materialised on a barren planet, before the other TARDISes surrounded it. The Doctors stepped out and watched, waiting for Rose to step out. Not a sound was made. Romana had found a gun and had it cocked and ready. The Third was menacingly brandishing a Neutron Polarity Reversing Machine, and the Fifth had his cricket bat. The door opened hesitantly. Rose emerged, Sarah screamed and all hell broke loose. She charged at the Fourth, tied his scarf as a bow in the Sixth's hair, wrenched the bat out of the Fifth's hands and began to batter the Seventh. The Third and Sarah ran up behind her up picked up the NPRM and smashed it on her head, but as it was nonexistant nothing happened. Rose turned and swung the bat with considerable strength born from the light of battle. It smashed into the Thirds head, he fell unconcious and fell down. Sarah ducked in behind the bat and began to throttle Rose, but Rose pulled herself away. She kicked Sarah in the stomach, and she fell to the ground. The Fifth had his second favourite cricket ball, and threw it at her accurately, but the Beast's strength was now so great she hardly felt it. She turned on the Fifth and swung the bat again, in a rather awful place, reducing the Doctor's prospects slightly. Romana sighted the gun, and fired. Rose ducked, the laser beam flew past her and smashed into the head of the Fourth. Romana screamed and ran to his side. Rose took the opportunity to run up to Romana and send her flying. Her head cracked into the side of a TARDIS and she went limp. Then as if nothing happened, all was silent. Rose had gone. Then the TARDIS of the eleventh arrived. He stepped out and saw the unconscious Doctors and decided discretion was the better part of valour, and went back inside. The TARDIS vanished.
The Doctors, Romana and Sarah lay still under the cold sky, and a light rain began to fall on their inert bodies.
