The girls and I were eating out for dinner that night in town, discussing the latest on A drama, and how I got way less texts then them- but I knew A was dangling my brother, Toby, and Mike over my head; and we also discussed Jenna being able to see, and why she lied about it. Suddenly Jason barged into the restaurant, not even seeing me, and went straight up to Mrs. Hastings demanding to know why Garrett was being represented by her.
It was awful enough to see that woman, because she must've hated Jason and me, but for her to take Garrett's side…my throat closed up as we all stared.
"Did you know?" I said turning on my sister.
"No." Spencer seemed shocked by the news, so I knew she wasn't lying. I looked back over to my brother and Spencer's mother.
"You should focus on taking care of yourself Jason…and your family." Mrs. Hastings said coolly, glancing in my direction for a split second.
"I am." Jason snarled defensively, and then left in a huff. We all got up and followed, but I looked rather saddened. I was trailing behind but when I caught Mrs. Hastings icy glare, I sped out of the place. Instead of following the girls down the street, I went the other way, and walked, not really knowing where I was going.
What was Mrs. Hastings getting at? And how could she? How could she defend the man who was under trial for murdering my older sister? Her daughter's best friend? Her hate for my family couldn't be why she was doing this, it was too petty and vain to pull a stunt like that…so what were her motivations?
I found myself in front of Toby's house, and I went up to ring the doorbell. After waiting for a few moments, the door clicked and opened to reveal Jenna...fully capable of seeing.
"Hi Jenna." I said awkwardly, knowing all the things Toby told me about her that not even the girls knew. I was mostly stunned by actually seeing her bright eyes again, after them being hidden behind those big dark sunglasses for so long.
'Oh…hello Madeline." She said with velvety sugarcoated sweetness in her voice, smiling daintily.
"I was just wondering if Toby was here-"
"Yeah, he's upstairs in his room, I think he just got out of the shower- you know, and his line of work gets a person sweaty-"
"Yeah." I cut her off blandly and stepped inside and she closed the door behind me.
"Just go on up then- you know this place on the back of your finger I'm sure."
Was there some resentment towards me in her tone? I shrugged and hurried upstairs to Toby's room and found the door wide open. Toby was shirtless, but he has pants on, so that was okay.
"Mads?"
"Oh, um…your sister…I mean Jenna…let me in. I'll go if you want-"
"You went through Jenna to see me? Late on a school night? You wouldn't be here face to face if it wasn't important Mads."
"I'm having a mental breakdown." I felt like I was over-exaggerating but whatever.
"Clearly." He chuckled as he pulled a shirt over his head. "It has to be big too, or else you would've just talked it through on the phone all night instead. So what's up?" He sat on the edge of his bed, and without even a gesture, I knew to sit beside him.
I sighed and told him about Garrett and Mrs. Hastings and my brother- all of it just came tumbling out. And like the friend he was, he sat there and listened, knowing exactly when to come in, and when to be quiet.
"You wanna spend the night?" he asked gently.
I nodded, wiping at my eyes, worried I may find a tear or two there, and said, "I just don't really feel home at home anymore. I feel like Jason hates me."
"Your brother loves you more than anyone else Mads. Don't say that." He embraced me and I wept for a minute or two into his big broad shoulder, and then I felt better.
"Shall I set up the sleeping bag or do you want the guest room?" he asked standing up.
"I'll take the sleeping bag." I murmured, and got up to get it, knowing his home so well, like Jenna said, I could just grab it. He chuckled and left to go make us both a cup of coffee, decaf, considering the hour.
I was so lucky to have him for a best friend…if only Ali could have seen in him what I did, and what the girls now did.
I finally went home the next night, late, as I stayed out as long as I possibly could, studying, hanging out with the girls and whatnot, only to be exhausted. I trudged into the living room, and practically fell onto the couch, already fast asleep. Jason was home by now of course, and he walked into the room to find me there. He knew he couldn't just leave me there, so he picked me up gently and carried me up to my room, and then tucked me into my bed. In my sleep, I could feel him kiss my forehead peacefully. I knew he could never hate me, but his distance…sometimes I took it farther than it really was meant to go.
A few days later, I was walking around town after school with my boyfriend, holding hands and chatting when a few yards away my siblings…were talking on a bench. My brother and half-sister, or rather brother and good friend.
"Mads?" Mike asked when we stopped suddenly.
I tore my gaze from them and looked over to Mike's slightly confused face and smiled brightly, "I'm fine, c'mon." We approached them and I could hear what they were saying, bits and pieces.
"I was messed up back then, and no matter what- I will never be able to make it up to her. Even if she forgives me, in the deepest dark pit of her heart, she'll always hate me for it- for not being there when she needed a princely big brother." I froze inside this time, knowing he meant me. He was so distant, even more so back then.
I remembered it like yesterday…The parties….the hangovers…the smells of drugs coming from behind his locked door…
And when he finally did come out of his room, he looked so frightening…
I had been around 11 when I could finally comprehend what he was doing, well, not fully; more like beginning to grasp at what Als was trying to tell me about our 'demon of a brother.'
I'd been sleeping, but was woken up by the shattering of glass, and the pounding music from downstairs. Our parents had been away, and Jason was supposed to be in charge of us two girls. So he threw a house party and got high with all his friends, and the drug-free ones were anything but sober.
I opened my door, and crept out into the hall, rubbing my eyes, getting closer to the lights and stairs, and saw a flood of people, all screaming curses and bobbing their heads strangely out of tune with the music. I looked around for Jason, and I found myself in the midst of all these people I didn't even know.
"Jay!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, but I couldn't even hear myself screaming for him.
I got pushed around in the group of people, and finally, two guys in the kitchen who were raiding our fridge realized I was there, and they smirked.
"Look Tom, a little dummie has come to play with us." He turned to me. "Where's your teddy bear sweetie? Shouldn't you be in your footy pajamas?"
I looked around and finally saw Jason's back to me, facing a ton of other people…two of them were Garrett and Ian.
I called out for him desparately, and just when I thought the older boys may touch me at all or anything like that, Ali came out of nowhere, graceful as ever, as she pushed me behind her and glared at the boys.
"Go hit on someone your own age, and stop trying to take advantage of a little girl." She spat at them. They grumbled and walked away with those red plastic cups in hand.
Ali turned to me and took my hand. She smiled and I had smiled back at her. She was the one who took care of me when Jason was supposed to. She would grudgingly give up her boys and parties, just to watch over me. I'd never told anyone that, not even Toby, because if it seemed like Ali had a heart…that'd be a mystery on its own.
Then a serious look had overcome her and she marched over to Jason, pulling me along. She turned him around and he staggered and looked at her as if to say, what the hell do you want, you pest?
"Our little sister was terrified when she wandered into this mess! If you don't start cleaning up your act, I'm going to tell Mom and Dad."
"Do it!" he challenged. She just smirked, and she got that look on her face when she knew she could use the information as blackmail instead…
"One of these days Maddie will be sent far away because of you, and it'll be all your fault!" and for the first time in what seemed like years, Jason looked at me. He didn't even seem to realize I was really there though, or else he maybe would have softened seeing the terrified look in my eyes.
Thing is, eventually, not for another year though, our parents did find out, and a week later, just like Ali suggested, I was on my way across the country. After that night, I'd follow my sister for anything she said, especially if it was about Jason. Which was why I had looked to her when it was time to say goodbye, and why when she shook her head, I had left without a word to my brother. I didn't even speak to him for a long time. Only when he called me up, saying he was back in Rosewood, and he could take proper care of me was the first time I'd acknowledged him in over a year. Not even for Ali's funeral had I looked his way.
But back in the present, Jason got up and left, and I talked to Spencer about what she had told my brother. The evidence about Garrett was being thrown away…and he was going to get his way and all charges would be dismissed.
...
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This may be my last update for a little while, because I'll be on vacation for the rest of my summer vacation, and I may not have internet access, sooooo enjpy this chapter! ;)
