(I feel like Cloud's a little OOC… so sorry. Changes made from the last "chapter" include: the last "chapter" was a prologue, fixed that. And Jasmine's stripper name is Diamond in the Rough now. That's all!
Enjoy! [I enjoyed writing this very much])
0o0o0o0o0
-Several years later-
Sora was currently putting make-up on Alice, who was to go on next with Ariel. The dull roar of the crowd beyond the black curtains was progressively getting louder as the performance was about to begin, but backstage had its own excited chattering from the dancers and make-up artists, and, of course, the excited squealing coming from Ariel who was talking to Roxas. The smell of alcohol and distant smoke was wafting in slowly but it quickly dissipated in the fans and air filters.
The years that passed allowed Sora to become much better with applying make-up, correctly combining an outfit for the dancers, and for him to get closer to all the people he worked with. Naminé still taught and helped Sora whenever he needed it, and the two of them had become very good friends. The two brothers still lived with Cloud and Leon, and Sora had saved up a nice amount of munny, but he had no need to ask to be a stripper. He was content being a backstage artist.
Both his and Roxas's lives had been getting better, which was a great relief for the two of them. Roxas had enrolled in school again and was getting amazing grades, which thoroughly impressed Sora and made Sora feel very proud of the blonde. Despite them being homeless for a year, Roxas still kept his genius and proved himself every day at school. It gave a sense of accomplishment and hope towards Roxas, like he'd actually done things right for him.
With their lives on a brand new track, Sora had begun looking for someone to call his boyfriend. He knew he was gay, that much was easy for him to tell, but he had never been in a relationship. Never found someone he wanted to be in a relationship with, to be correct. That didn't bother him much, but he was almost twenty, and that meant he should start looking for someone to be intimate with. Maybe not forever, but at least as an intro-to-dating type of boyfriend.
Sora tuned his attention back to the conversation nearest him, and laughed at a sarcastic joke Jasmine made to Alice, something about how Alice was too short to ride the Thunder train (aka, Cloud), and Sora doubled over with laughter, effectively smearing the lipstick he was applying to Alice.
"Sorry, sorry," He quickly waved off, grabbing a wet towel to wipe the red smudge off, "But I can't take a joke like that seriously, especially with your face, Alice." Sora pointed out and laughed again as the blonde girl made an angry pout. It was about that time that Jasmine went on stage, along with Belle, leaving Alice and Ariel backstage to continue getting ready. Sora then decided to listen in on what Ariel was talking to his brother about.
"Oh, and then what, cutie?" Ariel asked the blonde, a look of enthusiasm on her face.
Roxas smiled shyly, his legs kicking slowly from the stool he sat on. "Well, then, my teacher handed out the math test but I wasn't really ready for it, cause I don't like algebra, and then-"
"Rox, can you hand me the eye shadow?" Sora interrupted, snapping the blonde's attention back to his job of being a helper to Sora. His blue eyes searched for the eye shadow, and he handed it to his older brother when he found it. "Thanks, love." Sora grinned at Roxas before beginning to apply the eye shadow to Alice.
Roxas had begun sitting with Sora backstage every night because he didn't like being alone upstairs, and the dancers adored him. Besides, it gave Roxas something to do once he was done with his homework, which he got through extremely fast every day. Roxas also got an allowance for helping Sora. The setting wasn't normal for a thirteen, almost fourteen, year old boy to be subjected too, but Roxas was quite mature for his age, and Sora believed he'd be fine if he was just backstage. It's not like he saw the dancers strip.
"Anyway, I took the test and ended up with the best score of the class!" Roxas finished his story and giggled when Ariel made an excited noise for the blonde and hugged him tightly.
"You're such a smarty, Roxas! I swear, you could go so far with your brain," Ariel exclaimed, only letting slightly go when Cloud walked into the backstage area, her arm still around the smaller blonde.
Sora glanced at Cloud for a second but was re-focused on applying Alice's make-up to say anything. Cloud stepped over to Roxas and Ariel, his arms crossed. "You think he can go far?" Cloud questioned, normal brooding face in place, "Because I think he could go further than far with how smart he is." Cloud smiled ever so slightly as he ruffled Roxas's hair and placed a light kiss on Roxas's head.
The younger blonde smiled hugely up at Cloud at the compliment. "Thanks," He said, his blue eyes dancing with happiness. Cloud compliments were rare – for everyone except Roxas. It seemed that Cloud had become very close to Roxas, and Sora loved that. Cloud was the one Roxas went to for school work help (Sora was never the best at learning in the first place), and Cloud was always willing to help Roxas. It brought a smile to Sora's face; especially since Cloud was naturally seemingly cold and heartless, and for him to be so sweet to Roxas was something to behold.
"Here, I got you something," Cloud spoke, pulling out a Hershey's candy bar from his back pocket. "You need some weight on you anyway; are you sure you're not working out?" He handed Roxas the chocolate, which the younger blonde gladly took. Roxas had been losing a plethora, for a child of his age, amount of weight – 33 pounds to be exact – the past few months, and it was something that Sora worried about but not too much. He assumed Roxas was going through another growth spurt and just needed plenty of food.
"No, I don't like working out. It gets me all sweaty," Roxas complained with a small pout on his lips. He almost eagerly tore into the candy bar, but he quickly froze when he saw Sora staring at him with a look of complete shock. "U-um, may I have it, Sora? I ate all my dinner!" He pleaded, giving his older brother his best puppy eyes.
Sora let out a chuckle. "Just wanted you to ask instead of assume you could have it. But, yes, go ahead. Thanks, Cloud," Sora smiled brightly at the eldest blonde, who responded by ruffling the brunette spikes.
"I don't need a 'thanks' for trying to fatten up the twig over there," Cloud smirked at Roxas's gaping mouth, which caused Alice and Ariel to "Aww," loudly.
"Roxas, baby!" Ariel cried, her arms around Roxas once more.
"You're not that much of a twig!" Alice added.
"Don't listen to Cloud, he's just upset that he's not that skinny," Naminé said softly, ignoring the astonished look Cloud gave her.
"Yeah, you're just a perfect little kid," Alice smiled at the blonde as she hopped out of the chair in front of Sora and wandered over to the clothes rack to grab her outfit for the night – appropriately designed to resemble a school girl since the theme that night was common fetishes.
"Wow, don't you girls think Roxas is gonna grow up with a big ego with all of you spoiling him with compliments?" Sora asked, laughing. "But I can't deny he is perfect." Sora grinned at his younger brother, earning an embarrassed blush from him, but it quickly was replaced by another expression.
Roxas had a rather smug look on his face as he turned his nose up to Cloud. "See, it doesn't matter my size, I'm perfect, big brother," Roxas's eyes widened at what he said, including the eyes of everyone currently backstage. "I-I didn't mean that, Cloud! Sorry!" Roxas's head quickly turned down, the tips of his ears red in complete and utter chagrin. The past three years that they've all been living together, Roxas had never considered anyone his brother except for his actual brother, and even then, he rarely called Sora "big brother," much to the brunette's dismay. He couldn't deny that calling an older brother "big brother," was adorable.
Cloud was currently staring blankly at Roxas, but he soon rolled his eyes. "About time you accepted me, little brother," It was partially expected that Cloud would respond positively, but the older blonde was so unpredictable that it could've gone either way. But, his response made everyone backstage grin, especially Sora.
"Aww! Cloud! You're becoming such a softie!" Sora exclaimed, pointing to the right outfit Ariel was supposed to wear. He laughed at the cold look that was given to him by Cloud in response to the statement. "Don't give me that look when you know I'm right."
Cloud scoffed and stepped over to the clothes rack, pulling his outfit out to give it a once over. "You're not right, you're never right."
"Excuse me? I'm more right than you!" Sora countered and sat down in the now unoccupied chair for a much needed rest. "Well, when it comes to you and Roxas, at least."
Cloud rolled his eyes, about to reject Sora's statement when Roxas began swaying slightly on the stool he was sitting on. This instantly alerted Sora. "Hey, Rox, you feeling alright? What's wrong?" He stood and took a step towards Roxas, putting a hand on his shoulder to steady him.
"I… dunsht-" Roxas muttered before his eyes fluttered shut and he fell completely forward. Sora's arms were quick to go around him, and panic flowed into his body instantly, his heart beating a million beats per minute.
"Roxas! Roxas, are you okay?" He near shouted out of fright, lightly shaking his little brother. "Hey, can you hear me? Come on, answer me!" When there was no response, he muttered under his breath, "Shit…"
Sora's head swarmed with the possibilities of what was wrong. Sora had thought the weight loss was nothing but growth, but now that Roxas passed out, he had no idea what was wrong with his little brother. He felt like he'd done so many things wrong instantly, nothing right, and he vowed immediately to do everything in his power to make things right. Everything seemed to crash down in Sora's head, making his body shake in fear. Being homeless for so long had to have done something to Roxas's immune system, he could've caught something from the water they drank and it finally took action a few months ago and began eating away at Roxas. Everything Sora had done to protect his little brother had to be for naught, because whatever was wrong with Roxas had to be his fault.
Just like that day they left their house for the afternoon.
There was an almost instant circle formed around Sora and Roxas, made of Alice and Ariel, asking questions such as, "Is he okay?" and "What happened?" None of them had answers, and that only increased the fear that was bubbling inside of Sora; not that he expected them to know, but he wished someone knew something. Naminé had quickly stood beside Sora to look at Roxas, and the sympathetic look she gave the brunette made his mind go blank with absolute concern for his younger brother. He knew something was wrong, but he wanted someone to reassure him, even if it was a flat lie.
"Cloud! Cloud, tell Leon I'm taking Roxas to the hospital!" Sora yelled over the girls as he picked Roxas up, holding the limp boy close to his chest. He only briefly saw Cloud nod in confirmation to his demand before he was rushing out of the club through the backdoor, unlocked his worn down and used blue jeep, and buckled Roxas into the passenger seat.
"You're going to be okay," Sora whispered and lightly pressed his lips to Roxas's forehead, though he couldn't stop the quiver in his voice as he looked at the pale blonde.
This is all your fault. You'll lose him too.
Sora made haste of getting into the car and driving to the hospital – going faster than the speed limit and he prayed that a police car wouldn't pull him over. His heart was racing, he could barely think of anything else except how he did something to Roxas. It was him who brought them away from the foster home, it was him who sought a better life in Twilight Town, it was him who let Roxas drink and eat things a ten year old shouldn't be drinking or eating. Now, they were both paying the price.
It was hard for Sora to think that anything trivial could be wrong with Roxas. Only the worst thoughts came and went, putting more and more fear into the brunette. Not: maybe he was too tired, or maybe he had a bad headache, or maybe it was just a bad case of a cold. People pass out for all sorts of reasons, right?
But, not all of them lose 33 pounds in less than three months, or bruise easily, or are tired all the time.
Sora quickly shook his head at the thought that crept up after that fact. No, it couldn't be that severe.
He arrived at the hospital in record time. His parking job was wretched, but he didn't care enough to fix it before he was hopping out of the car and grabbing Roxas again. He checked to make sure Roxas was still breathing as he ran into the hospital.
His feet led him to the nurses' station in a hurry, as he yelled, "Help, my little brother – he collapsed!" Panic was obvious in his voice, eyes, and body language.
The nurse flinched slightly as she looked at Sora, then at Roxas. "What happened?" She asked, tapping a nurse near her to tell him to get the boy to a room.
"He just collapsed! He was fine just before that- help him! He needs help!" Sora shouted again, the boy heavy in his arms and Sora shifted his weight.
"Sir, I need you to take a deep breath and calm down," The nurse calmly spoke, just as a few of the nurses came by with a gurney. "Just let us take your little brother to a room so he can be examined."
Sora, as hesitant as he could be, handed Roxas to the nurses who set him on the gurney. As soon as Roxas was being wheeled away, Sora tried to follow, only to be stopped by the nurse behind the counter grabbing his arm. "I have to go with him," Sora almost whined, his voice on the brink of cracking and his eyes close to welling with tears he knew wanted to spill over his bottom eye lids. "I have to be there when he wakes up, he needs me there."
"I'm sorry sir," The nurse spoke softly, sympathy in her eyes. "I'll need you to fill out a report while he's being checked out, and you'll need to stay here until the doctor comes to get you."
"No, I am not waiting for the doctor to come get me! I am going back there with my brother and waiting for him to wake up with me beside him!" Sora yelled, sadness easily being replaced with an adrenaline-anger. He needed to go back with Roxas. He was incredibly afraid of losing him, of Roxas not waking up, or of Roxas waking up and him not being beside the blonde.
The nurse lightly shook her head and pushed Sora gently towards the waiting room. "You have to fill the paper work out, and then when the doctor comes to get you, you can go see your brother. I know it's hard but-"
"Don't 'but' me! I am not about to leave him alone in this hospital! I don't care how safe this place is, I will not leave him alone for a split second!" Sora shouted before again trying to walk towards the glass doors Roxas had been wheeled into, the caveat of "Authorized personnel and family past this point," flashing into his face in bright red. "I am family! I have every right to be with him now! I'll fill out this stupid form in the room with him!"
Blue eyes of the nurse hardened and she stood between Sora and the door. "If you do try to get back there, sir, you won't be allowed in his room once the doctor says he's ready for visitors. I suggest you go sit down and take a few deep breaths." She sternly, yet softly, spoke. Her calm nature and attitude forced Sora to rethink his current actions, and he took a few deep breaths.
Sora wanted to reason with her anyway, convince her to let him go back there with his puppy dog eyes, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. The adrenaline rush that was there a second ago was gone like snow on a hot pavement. His mind was finally wrapping around the fact that something had happened to Roxas, and that could've been it. He wouldn't have his little brother anymore.
All he wanted to do was sit down and stop thinking.
He took the clipboard from the nurse which held a sheet of paper to be filled out about the patient. He walked slowly over to the chairs set up in the hospital waiting room, and sat down, ignoring the looks of confusion, fear, and pity from the other people in the room who had seen the whole thing go down. As his mind calmed, the smell of antiseptics and powerful cleaning agents hit his nose like a truck, making him scrunch his nose slightly in distaste. His mind seemed to be completely shut down now, his head void of any thoughts except for the ones that concerned the sheet of papers questions.
Patient's name: Roxas Hikari
Age: 13
Cause for coming to the hospital: Fainted suddenly
It didn't take him long to fill out the sheet, and then he was just sitting there. He was still; facial expressions not giving off how he feels. It seemed like he was sitting there for hours, days even, when in reality, it was about twenty minutes. At that time, Leon and Cloud showed up. Cloud had gotten changed into normal clothes to go to the hospital, and both of them made their way to Sora.
"Sora?" Leon asked, his hand on Sora's shoulder to lightly shake him after the man did not respond to his name the first three times. "How is he?"
Sora's eyes locked onto Leon's after a second, his mouth open slightly. He was shocked about what was happening with Roxas, but the fact that Leon and Cloud both came here was incredibly unbelievable. It was true that the two had become very close to Sora and Roxas, but Sora never expected them to come to the hospital if one of them was in it. He loved the two older men like his own family, but, still, he couldn't believe they'd drop work to come there as well.
"Why are you here?" Was all Sora could ask, his eyes going between Leon and Cloud. "You didn't have to come; I can handle it here."
Cloud rolled his eyes and smacked the back of Sora's head. "You're an idiot, you know that?" He said in a slightly venomous tone but it softened almost immediately. "You two are like family, why wouldn't we come?"
Sora stared blankly at Cloud and rubbed the back of his head. "Family? You… consider us family?" Sora questioned, his heart seeming to lift at the notion. The thought of having a real family again, no matter how strange, was something he longed for since that afternoon three years ago. Wanting somewhere to call home and be welcomed every day, be loved even if those words never passed their lips, was a dream that seemed so unattainable or far away that he never saw this coming, even if the first two things on his list were already accomplished by the two older males.
"Of course," Leon answered, cold look still in place but his eyes read a different story. "Now, how is he?"
Sora took a second to answer, his head now swarming with the fact that he and Roxas had a family again. But, that was diminished as he thought about Roxas's condition again, and he fell back down to reality with a deafening crash. "I don't know yet, he's still being examined." Sora answered softly, his head turning back down to his hands which rested on his lap. Huh, he never noticed the smears of make-up on his pants until just now…
After a small nod, Leon asked, "How are you?"
How was he? Devastated, broken, scared, worried, upset, and angry. "Fine," Was all he said. His blank state of mind would be completely ruined if he spoke the truth. He wondered where he got the small scars between each of his fingers, which he examined with his hand close to his face. Distractions are wonderful.
"Don't give me that bullshit," Leon sighed, "I'll ask again: how are you?"
Sora bit his lip and set his hand back onto his lap, his eyes moving to his feet. If he talked about it, he wouldn't be able to keep his tears in, let alone his thoughts. He didn't want to cry at a hospital, didn't want to be one of those people who got the pitiful looks and words from the nurses and other people in the waiting room who knew nothing of why he was crying but shared his sorrow anyway. He didn't want to be seen as some kid here, that's not what he was, at all. Maybe if he saw something he could focus on on his shoes, or even the ground…
"I'm…" He started only to stop and take a deep, shaky breath. "I'm scared." The only emotion that raised above all the others was fear. The only one that seemed to grow worse and worse as the seconds past. He couldn't focus on other things; not when thoughts zoomed in and out of his head like a seal chasing penguins.
Leon and Cloud sat on either side of him as he held his head in his hands, his whole body shaking. "I can't lose another brother; I can't lose another family member. What am I going to do if I caused this? I've done so much to him already, I can't…" Sora folded in even more on himself, feeling the warmth of Leon's hand on his upper back, "I can't even begin to describe how horrible I'd feel for screwing Roxas's health up. We should have never left Destiny Islands, even if –"
"Do not say that," Cloud interrupted, "Don't say you should've stayed in that god forsaken foster home. That life there was something that would've made Roxas a thousand times worse if it had happened to him. You did the right thing, Sora. You protected him from something that would've scarred him for life."
Sora laughed weakly, "He already is scarred for life, Cloud." The two men knew exactly why Sora left the foster home in Destiny Islands, and they knew why they were in a foster home to begin with. It ate at Sora every day; the things that Roxas saw, how he couldn't…
"Roxas is so much happier here than he would have ever been in that foster home." Leon added gently, "He has a real home now, albeit a little unusual compared to his friends' houses, but he has a home with people who want him there, not just you. You should be happy that you provided that for Roxas."
Sora folded his legs crisscrossed on the chair, his knees on the arm rests, as he tugged on the end of his pant leg. "But, I could've ruined his health, this could be all-"
"Stop blaming yourself," Cloud said harshly, "You know what you did was right for both of you. You coming here, living with us, this is the best outcome you could've given to you and him. This is not your fault. You've been off the street for three years, Sora; something wouldn't lie dormant for that long. He's probably just caught something from school."
Sora glanced at Cloud, saw the sincere look in his blue depths, and he sighed. "I guess so," Sora murmured before looking at Leon as well. "But, you guys really don't have to stay here, as much as I appreciate it. I know you both have to be at the club."
"I can miss a day," Cloud stated and leaned back in his chair to the left of Sora.
"Naminé can handle the club for me while I'm gone," Leon informed, doing the same as Cloud on the opposite side. Sora looked between the two of them, saw the look on their faces that said they weren't going anywhere, and he smiled just slightly. It was nice to have them here, even if they were both stoic and cold looking. Sora saw past their exteriors and silence and knew they truly cared about him and Roxas. This dysfunctional family is exactly what he needed, especially at a time like this. The silent support they gave him made him realize just how fortunate he and Roxas were to have found them.
The three of them sat in silence for another hour, with the exception of occasional talk about where to get food or a drink, or about Sora's schooling (a GED class that he was trying his best in so he could start piecing a normal life together),or even friendly small debates about TV shows, to pass the time and hopefully distract the youngest brunette from his terrifying thoughts. It worked, for the most part. The conversations were light and easy, which made it effortless for Sora to focus on them.
In the middle of the three of them debating who the better character is in one of the shows they watched together, a doctor came out and called for Hikari. Sora jumped up and made his way to the doctor, with Leon and Cloud trailing close behind him. "How is he? What's the diagnostic?" Sora asked, but it came out as more of a blur of words with the speed.
The doctors' one visible aqua colored eye turned to Sora, and somehow he understood what Sora asked in order to answer him, "I'm Doctor Zexion Ishida; we are unsure about what caused him to faint, so we will need to run a few tests to determine what caused it. He hasn't woken up yet but his vitals are normal. He should wake up soon, but I'd like to keep him over night to monitor him. Otherwise, family can visit him." Zexion informed the three of them as he pushed his slate colored bangs only slightly out of his face, and Sora nodded slowly.
"What type of tests?" Sora asked tentatively. It wasn't the tests he was afraid of; it was the result. He wanted to know what was wrong with Roxas but hoped to God it wasn't anything bad. But, if Zexion wished to run tests then it might be more severe than he thought.
"A blood test should explain what we need to know," Zexion explained, checking his pager as it beeped a few times.
Sora glanced at Leon and Cloud before saying, "Do what you need to do, then. Figure out what's wrong with my brother," Sora said quietly, before, "Can we go see him now?"
"Are you all related?" Zexion asked, eyeing the two older men.
Sora nodded almost instantly, "Yes, we're all related. Room number, please." With the room number in mind, the three of them made their way up to the third floor and to room thirteen, where they quietly entered and Sora made his way to Roxas's side. He listened to the heart monitor beeping calmly and looked at Roxas's face. The blonde looked restless almost, not peaceful as most people do when they're asleep. His face was slightly scrunched, perhaps in a nightmare, and it resembled that of a child who had scraped their knee and they were about to start crying. Sora slowly ran his fingers through Roxas's spikes, causing the blonde to relax visibly, as if he knew that Sora was there now.
"He doesn't look good," He whispered, more so to himself than to Cloud and Leon. The two other men sat down in the chairs on the opposite side Sora was standing on, their eyes also on the sleeping blonde. "He looks like he needs a lot of sleep, and food," Sora continued whispering as he settled down beside Roxas on the bed. His heart felt like it was in a vice grip; it hurt more and more the longer he looked at his little brother, but he wasn't about to turn away.
Roxas was Sora's everything. Sora was supposed to be an only child (his mother had a heart disease and wasn't even supposed to have Sora), but when they found out his mother was pregnant, Sora was overjoyed. He had always wanted a younger sibling, ever since he could form a sentence. His friends all had siblings, older or younger, and he wanted that. Sora asked and asked and asked for a little brother or sister, and when his parents gave him the news he was going to have two little brothers, he screamed with excitement.
Sora had just turned seven when the twins were born, and he was quick to become an amazing older brother. He always played with the two of them, taught them simple things like shapes or letters, he even helped change diapers or feed one while his mother fed the other. Roxas was the younger twin, by about an hour, but the two were identical in appearance nonetheless. Even to their mother they were hard to tell apart, but Sora was always able to tell the difference even if they tried to fool him. He knew everything about his little brothers.
But, ever since that day, things had been much different. Roxas wasn't the same as he used to be, but Sora accepted the reason why and didn't try to change Roxas back. Sora continued to love Roxas with as much love as he could give, and the twins were everything Sora ever had. Since Sora wasn't keen to relationships or finding a boyfriend when he was in middle and high school, he had given all his love and caring to his two little brothers; more so Roxas now that the other twin was gone. And, since they were homeless for so long, Sora and Roxas were extremely close by force. They became the only biological family they had left in a single afternoon. The rest of their family – grandparents, uncles, aunts – were never around when the three were growing up, and had little to no knowledge about them.
Roxas fainting… it truly terrified Sora. Not just for the obvious reasons as to why Roxas would collapse, but for the small fact that this could be the beginning of the end. Something could have been seriously wrong with his little brother; he could lose Roxas, too. If he lost Roxas… he doesn't know what he'd do. He had spent so long making Roxas his priority that he didn't even know what to do with his own life. But, God forbid, if something happened to Roxas, Sora would be able to find out what it is he needs to do in life. Well, he hoped.
Sora hunched slightly over and pressed his forehead against Roxas's, closing his eyes as he just listened to Roxas's steady breathing. The normal function soothed Sora, as odd as that was. It reassured him that Roxas was okay, he was alive and breathing. Made him think whatever caused the faint was just a minor thing that can be fixed easily. That simple thought brought a small smile to Sora's lips, and he sat back up. "He'll be fine." Sora confidently, but quietly, spoke. He heard Leon hum softly in agreement, which brought Sora's attention to the two men.
"I forgot you two were here for a second," Sora whispered and chuckled lightly, his fingers going back into Roxas's hair to further relax the sleeping blonde. "But, again, you two can go. Now that we know he's okay, you don't need to be here. I'm probably going to stay though. I want to be here if he wakes up."
Cloud nodded once, "We're staying, too. You can't get rid of family that easily, Sor," Cloud teased with a soft smile.
"Exactly. We'll leave when Roxas is allowed to leave," Leon added and got more comfortable in the chair he was in. Sora breathed out and smiled his usual bright smile.
"Thanks, guys," He said and stayed sitting on the bed beside Roxas. He wasn't going to sleep that night, and he was fine with that. As long as he made sure Roxas was alright while he slept, he didn't mind.
Sora lost track of time easily, and noticed that Cloud and Leon had fallen asleep; Leon's head on Cloud's shoulder with Cloud leaning his head on top of Leon's. The two weren't dating, and they never would. Leon was straight, Cloud was gay. Sora knew the two of them have been best friends since they were toddlers, and they've really never been apart, except for when they went to separate colleges. Even then, they never once lost contact or stopped checking in on each other.
There wasn't much Sora knew about them – well, nothing in extreme detail. He knew Leon's mother was a drug addict, and Cloud's parents were rarely home after he turned ten, and that Cloud turned into a stoic ass when some incident happened when he was in college. But, other than that, everything about those two was a secret. That didn't bother Sora. He knew them very well either way, without the details.
Sora had begun to drift off every now and then, but he was determined to stay awake. He occupied himself with doing random stretches beside Roxas's bed, going out in the hall and talking to the nurses at their station about pointless things, or simply playing stupid games by himself that gave him great amusement with his sleep deprivation (such as I Spy). He kept himself as occupied as he could, since he knew if he stopped for even a second he'd be entrapped by his thoughts.
However, Sora had gotten so used to a normal sleeping schedule that staying up later than three in the morning was difficult for him. He yawned widely and lay beside Roxas, curling slightly on his side with his arm around his younger brother to make sure that Roxas knew he was there. It took only a few seconds for him to fall into a black oblivion. He didn't dream that night.
In the morning, he was woken up by Roxas lightly shaking him. "Sora… Sora, wake up," Roxas whispered quietly. "You're squishing me." Roxas spoke a little louder, making a strained exhale as he wiggled around to try and get out from underneath Sora.
Sora groaned and only wrapped his arms tighter around the small blonde, "You're stuck here," Sora mumbled. This was nothing new; Sora was a major cuddler when he slept, and Roxas was always the one to be cuddled too tight by Sora.
"Pleaseee?" Roxas whined, pushing at Sora's chest, "There isn't enough space on this bed for you to do this, this isn't fair." Roxas huffed and quickly admitted defeat, letting Sora kiss his blonde spikes and slowly move away from him.
"Fine, fine," Sora said and sat up, stretching his arms up. He then rubbed his eyes and looked towards the chairs that were supposed to be occupied by Leon and Cloud, but found they were empty. "Huh. Must've gone home," Sora said to himself and stood. "Well, it's early. I bet we could get you signed out and head home ourselves. Sound good?" Sora asked and turned his attention back to Roxas, easily shoving his own exhaustion back to be replaced by his normal enthusiasm.
Roxas nodded and sat up as well, yawning quietly. "I'm kinda hungry," Roxas stated. "Can we get pancakes, from that one place that makes them into stars?" Roxas asked with big puppy eyes.
Sora chuckled and helped Roxas out of the bed. "Of course. Then, we go home, and you continue to rest all day today, understood? I want to make sure you're okay," Sora handed Roxas his shoes, waiting for the blond to get them on and tied before leaving the room with him. They went to the nurses' station and got Roxas checked out (after one last quick check up with Zexion to make sure Roxas was alright to leave), and were about to leave in the elevator when they were stopped by Leon and Cloud.
"We're gone two minutes and both of you up and leave?" Cloud growled, "Rude." He then crossed his arms and Sora laughed, rubbing the back of his neck.
"Whoops. Thought you two went home," Sora waved a hand in the air at the look they both gave him. "What? I wasn't really expecting you two to be here at all anyway, automatically I'm going to assume you both just went home in the morning. Anyway, the nurses said Doctor Zexion should have Roxas's test results in a few days and he'll give me a call. So, I'm taking Roxas to get breakfast before we go home, if you two want to join." Sora invited and got on the elevator, holding Roxas's hand to make sure he stayed close.
Leon and Cloud nodded and decided to join the Hikari's for breakfast. They went their separate ways to drive there, and met at the somewhat desolate, but extremely popular, diner. It was a three story diner, shaped like a crooked tower with storage rooms branching off the main tower at random intervals. The outside was an almost light brown color, with the roofs being a bluish-greenish color. The windows were cut out and shaped to be moons or stars, and the same shapes were painted onto the roofs with lighter blues. Trees and small bushes were littered near the outskirts of the area, giving it a more secluded feel. The place was run by a man named Yen Sid, and therefore, the name of the diner was "Yen Sid's Tower." Not much creativity, but everyone in Twilight Town loved the food and theme.
Sora and Roxas were regulars here. Roxas absolutely adored the diner because of its theme, and Sora enjoyed it for the same reason. One of their favorite waitresses was, luckily, working today, and she knew Cloud and Leon since high school. Yuffie kept in touch with the two older men and saw them outside of the strip club regularly, and she was always ecstatic to see Roxas and Sora.
"My little Roxstar is back!" Yuffie exclaimed as she came rushing over from the back of the diner, scooping the blonde up and hugging him tight. Roxas laughed lightly but instantly tried to get out of her grasp. "Oh, and you guys brought Leon and Cloud, too!" She grinned widely at Leon and Cloud and set Roxas back on the ground, resting her arm on his shoulder as she leaned against him.
"Yeah, they wanted to come today," Sora said with a grin at Yuffie. Leon and Cloud said their hello's to Yuffie and both faced a huge hug from the small girl; Leon hugging her back while Cloud awkwardly patted her back. "So, how's work today? Busy as usual?" Sora asked once she had stepped away from Leon and Cloud.
"I just started my shift, actually," Yuffie answered, "I bet I could get you guys your favorite table. Let me go check real quick." She gave a slight wave and scampered off up the stairs.
"I will never get used to her energy," Cloud muttered and sighed through his nose. "It was hard enough getting used to Sora's energy." He added with a chuckle.
"I do not have that much energy," Sora countered defensively, "I am one of the most calm people you have ever met! My energy levels are almost always all the way down here!" Sora leaned slightly down and put his hand near the floor, but he instantly straightened up. "Nah, who am I kidding? I'm about as hyper as Yuffie." Sora said with a grin, putting his hands on his hips.
"Exactly, and most of the time, you're thirty times more hyper than Yuffie," Leon pointed out, crossing his arms. Sora rolled his eyes and ignored Leon. Of course he was hyper; he couldn't help it. It was like… he was programmed this way.
"You guys are in luck!" Yuffie shouted happily as she came skipping back over to them. "Follow me! By the way, Rikku and Yuna are on duty right now, they'll be by to see you two once they get a chance," She informed the group, leading them upstairs and to the third floor, setting them down at a table directly beside one of the moon shaped windows. This was their favorite table for obvious reasons; they could see almost everything in the area – the numerous trees, the beautiful sky, and sometimes a wild animal or two –, and the distant Twilight Town. Of course, this view didn't beat the one atop the Clock Tower.
"Sounds great," Sora grinned at Yuffie and sat down. "Rox and I will have the usual." He told the excited waitress and folded his arms on the table. He idly played with the napkin still folded neatly in front of him as Cloud and Leon ordered their food, and he turned his attention to Roxas. "You feel alright? Not dizzy? No stomach aches? Just because the doctor said you can go home doesn't mean you're one hundred percent better, you know."
Roxas shook his head lightly and turned his head down. "No, I feel fine," He spoke softly, almost inaudibly. "I'm… I'm really sorry I scared you and Leon and Cloud yesterday. I didn't think I'd faint. Most of the time the dizziness just fades away after a few seconds." Roxas bit his lip and pulled on his checkered bracelet nervously, his eyes watching his own actions.
"Wait, you've had these before? The dizziness?" Sora quickly asked, putting his hand on Roxas's shoulder to turn him slightly so he could look at the blonde's face. Sora's mouth was open in shock. He thought this was a onetime thing, not that it had happened before. That meant it could be something more serious… but, he couldn't tell Roxas that. He didn't want to scare his little brother. "Why didn't you tell me? We could've gotten you into the doctors earlier."
Roxas kept his head down, a frown evident in his voice, "I didn't want to worry you. I thought… I thought they'd just stop, but they didn't, and… and I didn't want to make you pay for a check-up." Roxas admitted slowly.
That stung. Sora sighed and ran a hand through his hair before he lowered his voice so only Roxas could hear. "Roxas, I never want you to worry about money for us. I have a lot saved up since we moved in with Leon and Cloud, and I can afford a doctor if you need one. If you're not feeling well, tell me, alright? I want you to be okay." Sora reassured with a smile as Roxas hesitantly looked up at him.
It hurt that Roxas thought Sora wouldn't be able to pay for a doctor. It hurt more that Roxas even worried about that sort of thing – Sora always made sure to keep Roxas as pre-teen as he could, so the blonde could grow up normally, but it seemed even that was a lost cause. At the same time, he felt like there wasn't much he could do to stop Roxas from growing up too fast. The blonde had always been extremely mature, even when he was young.
"Okay," Roxas said after a few silent seconds consisting of eye contact, "I'll make sure to tell you next time I get dizzy." Roxas offered a small smile up at his brother, and Sora grinned in response. He ducked his head slightly when Sora ruffled his hair, but didn't protest. They turned their attention back to Leon and Cloud, and started a new conversation.
"So, Sora, do you know what you want to do for a living? Certainly being a backstage artist at a strip club isn't what you want as a career." Leon asked, leaning back in his seat as his blue eyes bore into Sora's.
Sora exhaled and made a small groan. "I have no idea. It's really hard to decide. When I was in high school, I guess I liked drama the best, but at the same time that's a hard business to get into. Acting, I mean." Sora explained. He had been one of the drama geeks all the way through elementary to high school, and he always favored that over everything else. He was in numerous school plays and musicals, so he had no problem being in front of others.
"I think you should be a singer," Roxas stated matter-of-factly. "You have a really nice voice. Plus, it'd be cool if you were a singer. We could travel all over the world!" Roxas grinned and Sora laughed.
"I wish, Rox, but that's an even harder business to get into," Sora said, but at Roxas's frown he quickly tacked on, "But, I'll try, just for you. Even if I don't get a job as a singer, at least I tried, right?" Sora asked and glanced at Leon and Cloud, who nodded a few times in agreement.
"I'd think of an alternate option, though. Just in case," Leon informed and turned his gaze to just past Sora's shoulder. Sora's brows furrowed in confusion and he turned his head to look over his shoulder – only to come face to face with Rikku, and he practically jumped out of his chair.
"Rikku!" He shouted, holding in the scream that wanted to pierce the air with the instant fright that coursed through him, ignoring the gleeful laughter she emitted. "Don't do that! And, you, blondie!" Sora turned his "anger" towards Cloud, who was snickering in his seat across from Sora (it was obvious Leon did not see Rikku coming either), "You need to warn me of things like that, I could've punched her!" Sora glanced at Roxas, who was giggling like a mad man in his seat.
"I don't need to warn you. It's more fun when you freak out over stupid things anyway," Cloud said and laughed softly, his arms folded.
Sora pouted in the most angry way he could possibly muster. "It's not fun for anyone! Especially if I di-"
"Soraaa, shut up!" Rikku cut him off, putting her hands on his hips. "Don't I deserve a hug? And Yunie, too? We took time off our route to come see you!" She said, then held her arms out wide to Sora, who slowly hugged her. "Oh, don't give me that weak hug." She threatened lowly before hugging Sora as tight as she could.
"H-hey!" Sora squeaked and did his best to hug her back like he usually did. "I was just joking! Don't squish me to death!" He choke-laughed, surprised that the small girl had so much strength – she was a lot like Yuffie in that matter. He took a deep breath when Rikku let go before he hugged Yuna. The two girls then went to hug Roxas before standing beside the table.
"It's been a while since we've seen you two," Yuna pointed out to Leon and Cloud. "Yuffie says you guys come by all the time but we never see you. Must be because you're both so quiet." Yuna brushed her hair back over her shoulder.
"Oh, no, they just make it to where they're as unnoticeable as they possibly can be so no one else bothers them." Sora explained before laughing and sitting back down in his chair.
Rikku gaped at the two before Leon quickly said, "That's not the case. We don't come here much, actually. Yuffie over exaggerates everything."
Sora put his hand up between him and Rikku to cover his lips and he whispered, "They're too stoic to leave the house." Sora winked at Rikku and snickered with her.
The two girls were only able to chat for five minutes before their work duties called and the foursome were left alone again. Sora kept conversations going with the other three, sharing laughs at stupid jokes or listening to someone tell a story. Throughout the time, though, Sora was plagued and sometimes distracted by the distinct thought that something was seriously wrong with Roxas.
Every now and then, Sora would look at Roxas and see the blonde look more and more pale, but then the color would return after a couple minutes. It was strange, and it scared Sora to no end. He could just barely see miniscule red dots all over Roxas's skin if he stared long enough, and it was easy to notice the dark bruises that littered his arms or legs. He had been bruising unusually easy lately and that worried Sora as well. Even the nose bleeds had increased, and Sora felt as if everything was his fault, even if Cloud or Leon or anyone else told him otherwise.
Roxas meant so much to him, naturally. Even in those moments when Roxas and his twin were little and they'd purposely have temper tantrums to get what they want, or when they screamed at Sora for doing something "wrong," or even when Roxas tended to just be a child and hurt Sora's feelings (but he always apologized later), Sora still loved Roxas more than life itself. Like he thought about earlier, Roxas was all he ever had. Well, Roxas and his twin, Ventus.
He couldn't even begin to describe how many times he happily babysat his two little brothers over going to a party with his friends at Destiny Islands, or how he would drop his own school work to play with them. He always has cherished his siblings, and if he lost Roxas now, he'd lost himself.
Lost to the darkness, he thought, a sullen expression in place for a brief moment.
He put an arm around Roxas's shoulders and pulled him as close as he could bring him and pressed his lips against his head. "You know, I love you," Sora whispered and grinned when Roxas scoffed.
"I had no idea. I always thought you hated me, or were just bringing me along for the ride." Roxas mocked and rolled his blue eyes. "I love you, too." He said with a big smile.
Yuffie scampered up to the table with a tray resting on her shoulder and her hand supporting it underneath. "Wow that took a lot longer than usual, sorry about that!" She apologized and set the food in front of each person at the table, "Our chef got pissed off at everyone else; wouldn't even let anything out of the kitchen. Paine can be such a pain, I swear." Yuffie sighed and shook her head, but smiled when Roxas laughed at the joke.
"Well, as difficult as she is, she makes amazing food," Cloud complimented before starting to eat.
"Yeah, say thanks for us, will ya?" Sora asked and also started eating happily. Yuffie nodded and waved at the group before she left to go attend to another table that waved her down.
They were more focused on eating once the food arrived, but they did occasionally talk. Mostly, it was Sora, since Sora couldn't keep his mouth shut and eat for more than two minutes. They finished their meal slowly, enjoying each bite, and once they were done, they stayed at the diner for another half hour, just talking. It was pleasant – carefree.
"See, Leon, that's where you're wrong," Cloud objected Leon's statement, "If there was to be a fight between us, I'd so kick your ass."
Sora instantly covered Roxas's ears, "Cloud! There's a child here!" He hissed, keeping his hands over Roxas's ears despite Roxas complaining about how he hears swearing all the time. "You do not Roxas, be quiet now."
"Cloud, you would not win against me," Leon stated easily, "You would lose so quickly it'd take you a while to realize it." Leon smirked and let Cloud glare at him.
"Bullshit! Sora, who do you think would win?" Cloud turned to the younger brunette, who was usually the tie breaker whenever Cloud and Leon began arguing about pointless things.
"Well, let's see here," Sora began, uncovering Roxas's ears to discuss with him, "On one side, Leon has the strategic skills and the ability to see what someone is planning to do, and he's just smarter than Cloud." The two brothers ignored Cloud who protested to the last part.
"But, Cloud has the steely expression that makes it hard for even Leon to decipher Cloud's next moves, and Cloud is fast," Roxas added slowly, putting a hand to his chin in deep thought.
Sora also held his chin in thought, "And they both have the muscles to match each other evenly for the physical confrontation…" Sora pointed out, before they leaned in and covered their lips, an intense whispering battle starting up between them.
Cloud and Leon looked at each other than sighed. This is usually how these arguments were settled; Sora and Roxas agreed on something and gave the verdict. As strange as it was, it was better that the younger blonde and brunette settled this for the two older men, or they'd be fighting about it all night and would end up being pouty, brooding adults for not actually resolving anything.
"Okay! We've decided!" Sora triumphantly said to snap Leon's and Cloud's attention back to them. "Considering you both have different strong points mentally but the same strong abilities physically-"
"It'd be a draw, or it'd depend on who got the killing blow first." Roxas finished before him and Sora nodded in unison.
Leon and Cloud looked about to protest before they sighed. "It pisses me off that that makes sense," Cloud murmured and crossed his arms.
"It seems we'd work better being on the same team, hm?" Leon inquired before taking a sip of his coffee. "Anyway, it's about time we head back home."
Sora nodded in agreement. "I'll pay for Roxas and I's meal." He stood up and pulled Roxas's seat out for him, waited for Leon and Cloud to stand as well, and then they made their way back downstairs to pay at the register. Once that was done, they said farewell to Yuffie, Rikku, and Yuna before they once again parted ways to go home in their separate vehicles.
The trip home was mostly silent. Sora wished he could turn the radio on for them, but the car was as beat up and worn down as they got, and, therefore, had no radio. Most of the time, they'd sing a song they knew by heart, but for some reason, it didn't feel right to sing at this moment. Perhaps the incident with Roxas fainting was still eating at Sora's mind – saying "perhaps" was an understatement. The thought was like a plague in his head right now.
"Are you feeling alright?" Sora asked and took a few short glances towards Roxas. He saw the blonde nod out of the corner of his eye. "No dizziness? What about your stomach? Does it hurt? Or what about-"
"If I was in pain at all, I wouldn't nod when you asked if I was okay, Sora." Roxas snapped, glaring at his brother. "Don't treat me like some sick kid, I fainted once, I'm not dying. Stop freaking out. It's not cool."
Sora was silent for a couple minutes. Roxas had never gotten mad about Sora's concern for his health or well-being; in fact, Roxas always liked the worry. "I'm… I was just… Sorry." Sora quietly spoke, biting his tongue to stop himself from asking anymore questions.
Sora frowned to himself. Was he worrying too much? Maybe he was scaring Roxas. He couldn't even imagine purposely scaring his brother; it wasn't a part of who he was. But, it was possible that his questions were scaring the blonde, maybe his little episode frightened him as much as it did Sora. Either way, Sora was sure to keep quiet.
They arrived back at the club with barely any words passed between them, and they silently made their way up to the small house above the club. Leon and Cloud weren't home yet, and Roxas went straight to their make-shift room and shut the door (that had been installed the same week they arrived, so the brothers had privacy if they needed it). Sora let out a sad sigh and plopped down on the couch, toying with his crown necklace that Roxas had given to him for his 18th birthday.
At least he's resting, like I asked him to. Sora thought before tucking his knees underneath him. He let out a sigh and rubbed his head before turning the TV on. He promised himself that whatever was wrong with Roxas he'd fix, even if it ran him through hell and back.
0o0o0o0o0
The week had gone by quasi normally. Sora kept himself busy with work and Roxas helped him in the club every other night (Sora made him stay in the room and relax), and Sora had gotten calls from Doctor Zexion saying that he had to wait longer because they needed to examine the blood further. Sora didn't mind; much. Of course, he wanted to know what was wrong with his brother, but at the same time, he'd rather it be kept a mystery and act like it never happened. He bit his tongue so many times trying to stop himself from asking Roxas if he was okay that his tongue had bled several different times, but the blonde didn't seem to have any problems except for his bloody noses.
Cloud and Leon were being extremely helpful with everything as well. They kept their usual calmness in check to tame Sora down whenever he seemed about ready to snap from needing to know how Roxas was, and they helped keep Roxas's mind off it the most; doing projects that had very little physical labor with the youngest blonde, playing games, helping with homework or simply talking to him. Sora appreciated their effort, and joined in on the distractions the majority of the time.
Today, however, Zexion had left a message saying that Sora and Roxas, and whomever else wanted to join, needed to come down to the hospital so he could give the diagnostic. That gave Sora a brand new fear, because if it was nothing Zexion would've just told him that on the phone, but he kept his outward appearance as energetic and happy as usual, so he wouldn't frighten Roxas. Cloud and Leon were both busy that day – Cloud with visiting his old friend Tifa that he had made plans with months before, and Leon with things that concerned the club – so they couldn't join, but they wanted the verdict as soon as Sora heard it.
Sora was currently driving with Roxas in the passenger seat, and they chatted about nothing in particular. Their conversations were like walking on eggshells the past week. Sora didn't want to scare Roxas and Roxas didn't want to worry Sora more. It was unhealthy they did that, but they did it to protect each other.
They arrived at the hospital and made their way in, Sora holding Roxas's hand to cross the street, even against the blonde's protests because "he's old enough to cross the street without holding hands," so he says. Sora ignored him and went to the nurses' station to let one of them know why they were there. They were told to go to one of the examine rooms down the hall and wait for Doctor Zexion there, so, once they were there, Sora got Roxas up on the examine table to sit.
"I never realized how short you are," Sora pointed out then laughed at Roxas's glare. "Hey, I'm not the tallest person either, but you're pretty tiny."
Roxas crossed his arms and turned his head away, "I'm still growing, don't make fun of my size." He whined before turning his head to the door as Zexion stepped in.
"It's good to see you two," Zexion first said, tucking a clipboard underneath his arm. "How have you been this week, Roxas?"
Roxas shrugged some and kept his gaze on his doctor. "Tired, mostly. I did get dizzy a few times, though… but, they weren't bad." Roxas explained, trying his best to ignore the look that Sora gave him, the look of "why didn't you tell me about this."
"I see," Zexion flatly said before he let out a sigh. "Sora, if you could step out in the hall with me for a quick second, there's something very important I need to tell you." Zexion motioned for Sora to follow, and the brunette did with haste.
"Is there something wrong?" Sora immediately asked once the door to the examine room was shut and he was sure Roxas couldn't hear.
Zexion looked as if he was struggling with the words, his aqua eye refusing to meet Sora's bright blue. "We did many different tests on the blood samples that we took from Roxas, and each result came up the same. This isn't going to be easy to hear," Zexion warned before finally locking gazes with Sora. "Roxas has acute lymphocytic leukemia, high risk."
Sora's whole world seemed to freeze. His mouth hung just slightly open, his breathing hitched, the bustling noise of the hospital was cancelled out, hell, he even felt like his heart stopped beating. Those seven words just created a new fate for Roxas, one that would be painful with chemotherapy or radiation and the side effects, one that doesn't guarantee life. This meant that Sora's little sunshine could be taken away from him much too soon.
Instantly, his mind went to how Roxas would cope with this. What if the tiny blonde couldn't handle the treatment? What would he do if, no matter what he tried, he couldn't save Roxas? No, no, even if the efforts were for naught, he'd do everything for Roxas, even against his own health. Nothing else mattered anymore, except that he had to keep his brother alive if it was the last thing he could do. Losing Roxas would just be the nail in the coffin for Sora.
How could this even be? Cancer wasn't something you just… picked up, right? How had Roxas gotten it, of all kids? Not that any kid deserves it, but… this was his sunshine. Sora couldn't bear being the only Hikari left. It didn't make sense. Why was fate playing such a cruel game on him? What had he done to have these awful things happen at his home, at the foster home, and now here? Sora was about ready to start voicing these questions, but his throat felt shut and useless at the moment, like something was strangling him.
First Ventus, now Roxas…
Sora was too shocked to do anything, so he just kept staring at Zexion, his mind swamped with those thoughts that concerned the news. Sora forced himself to take a deep breath, and all the noises of the busy hospital came rushing back to him, as did reality which hit him with what felt like a thousand bricks, weighing down heavily on his shoulders to the point where he felt like collapsing. "Are… are you one hundred percent sure?" Sora tentatively, quietly, asked. He could feel his chest restrict in pain and even more worry. He didn't want to believe what Zexion said, but he had no choice. Once he got a definitive answer, he'd have to figure out a way to tell Roxas, because he couldn't let Zexion do it for him.
"I am. We ran many tests," Zexion confirmed, before adding, "I am very sorry."
Sora slowly shook his head and looked down at the ground. "I want him in the best treatment as soon as possible. I don't care how expensive it is, I'll find a way to pay for it. Can you just… get me the names of the doctors who best specialize in these things? Give me any information you can. I'll go and tell Roxas this."
Sora was strangely in check now. The news he got made him want to scream at the top of his lungs that this wasn't fair, he wanted to make Zexion do more tests, he wanted to pretend this was a dream and wake up already. But, deep down, he knew this wasn't a dream. This was real. And freaking out on Zexion for doing his job, or snapping mentally and not being the rock he knew Roxas would need wouldn't help anyone. He knew what he needed to do to get his brother help, and he would get it immediately, even if that meant setting aside his break down of the situation until much later, when he was alone and he knew Roxas was getting treatment.
He waited for Zexion to nod and walk away before he took another deep breath. His blue eyes locked onto a specific tile on the ground, and he tried to calm down, even just a little more. When he finally gathered up the courage and ability to talk to Roxas, he slowly stepped into the examine room again.
Sora looked at Roxas – at how innocent the blonde haired boy seemed, with his legs swaying slowly, his hands clasped together loosely, how Roxas's similar blue eyes travelled around the examine room as he surveyed each poster or diagram hanging on the walls in both curiosity and boredom – and bit back the urge to just… cry and scream, thinking that this little boy would be suffering even more from now on. He forced himself to keep it together. He had to. For Roxas, he reminded himself, walking until he was standing directly in front of Roxas. He forced his brave face on and took one last deep breath.
Sora grabbed Roxas's hand and lightly kissed the top of it. This was so hard to even begin to put into words, so he just smiled sadly at Roxas and said, "So… Zexion told me you're… really sick, Sunshine," His voice was so soft it was basically a whisper. He was trying so hard to stay collected and somehow tell Roxas this without breaking down himself.
"Sick with what?" Roxas asked, a confused stare in place as their eyes locked after Roxas got done reading one of the posters about heart health. Sora tried to answer him, but he was silent for minutes. How could he tell Roxas this? He was only thirteen! All he should be worrying about right now is school and his growing body and hormones and girls or boys, not when his next chemotherapy treatment is or if he's ever going to be okay.
Sora's mouth opened and closed a few times before he sat beside Roxas and wrapped an arm around his shoulders, drawing the boy close. "Well, Rox," Sora began, his gaze averted to his free hand in his lap. "He said that… that you have leukemia." That last word was choked out. Sora couldn't help the tears in his eyes, and he could feel Roxas tense up in his arm.
"L-leukemia?" Roxas stuttered, looking up at Sora with the most scared look Sora has ever seen in his blue depths – besides during that incident three, almost four, years ago – and that tore Sora apart, "But I was really healthy! I was always healthy, I played the games in gym a-and – that isn't possible! I can't have that! This isn't fair!" Roxas's eyes filled with tears, and the crying quickly ensued.
Sora instantly wrapped his other arm around his brother and held him tight. "Hey, hey," Sora whispered, his voice thick with his own unshed tears. "We'll get through this, right? You're so strong, Roxas, it's crazy. And you have me and Cloud and Leon for support; you'll get through this, I know you will."
Sora's lips pressed against Roxas's blonde spikes and let out a shaky sigh. Roxas's body was wracked with tears, and it was getting progressively harder for Sora to stay together. He kept whispering encouraging things to Roxas, hoping the boy would start gaining even a little hope towards fighting this, or even calm him down would be enough right now.
The two brothers were left alone for fifteen minutes, in which Sora was rubbing Roxas's back and quelling the tears, and were quietly talking about stupid, tension breaking things when a brunette nurse walked in. She offered a smile towards the brothers, and that seemed to put an ease to the tense air. "Hello, my name is Aerith Gainsborough, Doctor Ishida sent me in here to go over treatment options with you. I'm a pediatric oncologist and will be the person helping you and Roxas through the treatment and after. And, of course, I'd love to get to know Roxas." Aerith explained as she stepped closer to the table they were sitting on and held her hand out to Roxas, a manila folder tucked underneath her other arm.
Roxas was still shy, but he slowly grabbed her hand and shook it. "Hi," He muttered, his blue eyes red and swollen at this point, then leaned more into Sora, who in turn gave him a squeeze of reassurance.
"That'd be great," Sora said to her, using his arm to wipe out the remaining tears in his eyes. "Do you want to be here and listen to your options, Rox? Or do you want me to get you the best kind?" Sora asked, his gaze focused on the blonde who was still tucked into his side. Sora knew how smart Roxas was for his age, despite missing the entire 5th grade, and wanted to give Roxas the option of picking something himself if he wanted to do so. It was his fight after all.
Roxas shook his head, "I want to be here," He whispered quietly, then turned his attention to Aerith who pulled a chair up to sit in front of the brothers.
Aerith nodded and grabbed the folder, opening it up on her lap. "First, I'll explain the phases. We will begin with phase one, where remission induction beings. This phase means we will focus on killing the leukemia cells in the blood and bone marrow to put the leukemia into remission. After that, consolidation or intensification phase will begin, and that is when we will kill any remaining leukemia cells that may make the cancer relapse. Once that is done, phase three will start, also known as maintenance. That is when we will kill any cancer cells that may regrow to cause relapse, and the doses for it will be lower than in the previous two phases.
"Each phase will include combination chemotherapy in high doses along with anticancer drugs which will be given in high doses as well. Intrathecal and systemic chemotherapy are given to prevent or treat the spread of leukemia cells to the brain and spinal cord, but since Roxas's leukemia hasn't spread to either, they will be preventing, and no radiation will be needed unless it manages to spread to his brain. Treatments in clinical trials for children with high risk, such as Roxas, will include new chemotherapy regimens, with or without the targeted therapy to stem cell transplant. Now, your treatment options are: chemotherapy, which is required for children such as Roxas; radiation on specific parts of the body where your leukemia is most abundant; chemotherapy with stem cell transplant which replaces the blood cells with that of a donor's healthy blood, which would most likely be your brother, but that treatment is more so used if your cancer returns; and finally, there is targeted therapy, which uses drugs that identify and attack specific cancer cells without harming normal cells. Treatment must start immediately if we want the best possible outcome." Aerith finally concluded as she handed a few papers to Sora and Roxas that explained in even greater detail the treatment options and the phases.
The two brothers looked over the papers carefully, staying quiet while they both digested the information. Everything Aerith had said was more than a lot to take in, and Sora wasn't sure if he even understood the majority of it. From the look on Roxas's face, though, it seemed he understood it. At least his little brother was smarter than him with these medical things, but he knew he'd have to brush up on his own skills if he wanted to help Roxas out the best he could. He made a mental note of doing some of his own research that night before Roxas quietly spoke up.
"So… I can start doing clinical trials or a different treatment option whenever I want to, right?" Roxas asked slowly, his blue eyes leaving the papers he was holding to lock gazes with the green eyes of Aerith. When she nodded, he continued, "I think I just want to stick with the chemotherapy, everything else seems like just… too much." Roxas informed and handed Aerith his papers, "But I wouldn't mind taking part of the clinical trial later, I just don't want to start with it."
Sora looked down at Roxas. The blonde boy looked so fragile, he couldn't believe he could make such a grown up decision by himself. Of course, Sora understood why Roxas had to grow up so fast, but he didn't think he'd ever have to decide something like cancer treatments. Sometimes he's more adult then me, Sora thought and resisted the urge to chuckle. Instead, he rubbed Roxas's arm and kissed his blonde spikes.
"That's perfectly fine," Aerith said and smiled at Roxas, earning a shy smile back, "I will get in touch with another specialist as soon as possible to see about the nearest start date for the chemotherapy. Sora, I'll need you to come with me to discuss prices and payment plans." Aerith stood up and motioned for Sora to follow her, but she first turned to Roxas, "I'll make sure to help you get through this, too. You look like a very strong kid; I bet you'll recover in no time." She reassured, and the blonde haired boy slowly nodded in agreement.
After that, Sora left his phone with Roxas so he could play a couple games while Sora was out of the room. He didn't want Roxas to be left alone with his thoughts; he knew how horrible one's mind could be.
They discussed a payment plan, and Sora explained over and over again that Roxas only got the best, even if it was three hundred times more expensive than the normal way most people took during the treatment. Sora needed Roxas to survive, and he'd do anything to help his brother. He'd have to talk to Leon about a promotion once he got home.
Sora got to know a little bit about Aerith, and he found out she too knew Leon and Cloud. Now, that was a strange coincidence. The two males had never brought her up before, or perhaps they had and Sora's faulty memory was getting to him. She had apparently known Leon and Cloud and Yuffie since high school, like they all grew up together. After that was established, Aerith seemed much more interested in taking care of Roxas outside of the hospital, with checking his vitals and making sure he was healthy, as free deal. It was something she said she wanted to do, because Sora seemed like a very caring brother. He had a feeling that knowing her other three childhood friends had something to do with the special treatment, but he wasn't about to complain. He really lucked out with Aerith.
Once everything was finalized and Aerith left to go make appointments for Roxas, Sora ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath. This… this was going to be difficult. Especially for Roxas. Scrounging up the ability to keep a happy face on was going to be even harder, but he'd do it. He had to make sure that Roxas kept his spirits up, even if the chemotherapy was going to make him feel like shit. Sora would be there for Roxas every step of the way, and he'd never leave Roxas's side.
Sora stayed outside the examine room for a few more minutes, collecting his thoughts. He still felt the need to cry, possibly scream about how this still wasn't fair, or just yell in pure frustration and anger towards everything and everyone, but he kept that part of him down. Again, he decided it'd be better if he let that side of him out later, when he was alone.
Slowly, he pushed open the door and smiled softly at Roxas. "Alright, Rox," Sora spoke gently, making his way over to the blonde on the examine table as Sora lightly pressed his lips to Roxas's forehead, "I think it's time we head home. Today's been sucky, so, want to get some sea salt ice cream? I bet we have time to go up to the Clock Tower today, too." Sora stated and helped the frail boy off the table, then they began to leave the hospital.
Roxas was quick to agree to their favorite ice cream, and to go to their favorite place to be to eat said ice cream. So, they clambered back into Sora's car and drove to the ice cream vendor that knew their names, making very intense talk about almost everything under the sun and under the sea, even as far as the galaxy. It was an obvious distraction from the day's events, but they both needed a break, even though the cloud of what-the-future-holds hung around them like the town's notorious sunset.
They made their slow journey up the clock towers steps, and once at the top, settled down comfortably on the ledge in order to look out at the sunset. As they ate their ice cream in silence, Sora began wondering about certain… things he didn't want to dwell on.
His initial thought was him wondering how much different everything was going to be. Would Roxas need to be home schooled now, or more so, online schooled, due to any horrible side effects from the chemo that made him unable to attend school? He hoped that wouldn't be the case. Roxas loved going to school now, and he didn't want to force the blonde to go away from something he actually enjoyed doing. Especially since Roxas had made such a tight knit group of friends with two other boys and a girl. Sora couldn't imagine ripping Roxas away from that.
The next thought was: what if he can't afford the top notch medical treatment for Roxas? He still planned on talking to Leon later about a promotion, but even if he got that promotion, would he be able to sustain a steady payment to continue great treatment?
Sora rubbed his forehead and let out a sigh, then looked towards his younger brother, who was currently eating the remainders of the ice cream. A smile came to Sora's lips, and he leaned over to kiss Roxas's temple. "You know I love you, right?"
"You know, for how much you tell me that, I don't know if I believe you," Roxas gave Sora a mischievous smile, before laughing, which easily caused Sora to laugh as well.
These simple moments always made Sora feel as if everything was still okay. These moments are what Sora thrived for when they were homeless and struggled so hard to survive, but, right now, this particular moment just seemed to… calm Sora down. Even in the manner that would last only a few hours, it made him happy knowing that they could still share a laugh like this together, despite the horrible news that was given to them earlier.
Even so, Sora hoped that moments like these would continue coming, even if life threw them a million curve balls.
0o0o0o0o0
Sora and Roxas had ended up spending the day out, doing things that required little to no physical work – excluding walking. After ice cream, they had gone to the mall and Sora spoiled Roxas just a bit (in Sora's terms, "a bit" was: three bags of clothes, two pairs of new shoes, and at least one bag with five new games in it). He knew he probably shouldn't have spent a portion of his rainy day funds, especially knowing how much he'd need to be paying the hospital, but, why couldn't he spoil Roxas? Today was hard for both of them, but Sora knew it was a thousand times harder for Roxas. He felt the boy deserved a bit of spoiling.
Once they arrived back at the Dusks and Shadows, Sora hauled the bags upstairs and told Roxas to go into their room and play some of his new video games. Sora had to talk to Leon immediately, and he needed to tell Leon and Cloud about what the results were from the doctor. He dreaded coming home, but, he couldn't avoid responsibility forever.
"You two are finally back," Leon stated as he walked out from his room, his blue eyes glancing towards Cloud who was sitting on the couch and gave a backwards wave towards Sora. "What was the verdict?" Leon asked once Roxas had shut the door to Sora's and his room.
Sora sighed through his nose and took his shoes off slowly. "Well, it… really sucks," Sora whispered, instantly drawing the attention of both older males; not just for his quiet voice but for what he said. "Roxas… Roxas has leukemia." When Sora admitted it out loud, reality gave him a nice punch in the face. It brought things into an even newer light, made him see how real everything was. Made him feel even worse.
Cloud and Leon just stared at Sora silently. Not in the way they usually did, but in an unusual sympathetic way. Both their eyes showed somewhat pity and sorrow themselves, since they were a strange little family now, but words never left their mouths. Sora liked that they didn't say the cliché things of, "I'm sorry," or, "it'll get better," because as much as those words sounded nice, it made things feel incredibly more terrible. Something about the way they were always said, especially in a hospital or when someone they just met was saying that, made them feel forced and un-meaningful. Sora could tell, just by the two mostly silent people's looks, exactly what they wanted to say. And that, somehow, felt more sentimental and honest.
"He's doing chemo, his first appointment is in a week," Sora further explained, rubbing his forearm slowly, "But, I need to talk to you about a promotion." Sora turned his gaze to Leon, but it was clear that Cloud wasn't going to leave and give the two privacy. And, he was the first to speak up.
"No," Cloud flatly said, "There's no way you can become a stripper, Sora."
Sora was taken aback by Cloud's statement. "And why not? I'm just as capable as the rest of you, I have a fit body, and I'm flexible. I could handle my own as a stripper. I need the money, Cloud," Sora defensively said, then shook his head, "Wait, why am I even explaining this to you? I need to talk to Le-"
"I agree with Cloud," Leon cut Sora off, his arms crossed as he leaned against the back of the couch. Sora's mouth gaped open and Cloud stood up to stand beside Leon. "Stripping just isn't something you should be doing. I could give you a raise instead."
Sora shook his head aggressively, "No, no, no. I need more money quickly. I've seen how much Jasmine and all of them make in a night, hell, I've seen how much Cloud makes in a night, on top of how much you pay them. I need that type of income. I don't know when the last time you checked how expensive hospitals are, but they're pretty damn expensive." Sora explained, not about to back down even if the two older men seemed rather intimidating at this moment.
"No, Sora. You're still too young. You're barely twenty," Leon pointed out, "Even if you're of legal age to be a stripper, you're just too young. You do realize that being a stripper means you'd have to expose a lot more of yourself than you'd like?" Leon questioned, his light blue gaze boring into Sora.
"Of course I know that! What, do you think I'm stupid?" Sora snapped, "I am going to have very expensive hospital bills to pay very soon, and I'd love it if I could start making dents, no matter how small, in my debts from the start instead of having one massive final bill in the end. Can you please let me do that?" Sora was getting offended and angry that they would be rejecting him in this way. Why did they decide how Sora paid for things, let alone decided how he ran his life?
"Like Leon said, you're still young," Cloud put in, "You look young. A lot of people, males and females alike, will try to seduce you and touch you in every which way. People are dangerous, Sora. Especially when it comes to drunken idiots with loads of munny." Cloud added with a grave expression.
"I don't give a damn about some stranger trying to feel me up, I care about getting Roxas the treatment he deserves!" Sora's voice steadily rose, but he tried to bring it back down. He didn't want Roxas to hear them talking about this, but it was difficult to stay calm. "Look, I get you guys are worried about me, but I'll be fine. Fine. Do you hear that? F-I-N-E. I can hold my own and can fend off the perverts if I need to. Isn't that why you have security, too, Leon?" Sora asked and looked at Leon with an accusing stare.
Leon let out a sigh, "Yes, but-"
"Hah! But! But nothing, Leon! I need this promotion!" Sora sternly said, his brows drawn together in anger, "I'm not some child and you both know that. Let me provide for Roxas, like I've been doing for the past three years. Give me that promotion Leon, I'm more than deserving of it, and you really don't want to see how low I will go to give Roxas the proper treatment he needs and deserves." Sora threatened and looked between both Leon and Cloud.
Cloud rolled his eyes. "Sora, you don't seem to understand that people will be trying to use you. In any way possible. People get hurt by people like that. Do you want Roxas to lose another family member if you're sought after, stalked by some guy or girl who gets infatuated with you?"
Sora stared at Cloud, his mouth hung slightly open, "You did not just say that," Sora lowly said, his blue eyes burning with rage, "You did not just bring losing another family member up to me! Roxas and I have lost three family members! And if anyone is going to lose another family member, it's going to be me! And I will not lose Roxas, ever! Roxas won't lose anyone else, I won't lose anyone else, and I will not let that happen! Don't ever say that shit again, Cloud!" Sora yelled, stepping forward to shove the older blonde roughly.
Cloud wasn't about to retaliate, but Leon stepped in and held Sora back from going after Cloud again. Sora wasn't one for violence. This was just a stress and sadness related aggression, and that was the only reason Cloud didn't fight back. "Sora, lower your voice, Roxas can hea-"
"Oh, shut up!" Sora then shouted at Leon, grabbing Leon's arm from around him and he pushed himself away from the older brunette, "Why do you two both think you can tell me what to do?! Neither of you are my dad, my dad is dead!" Sora's breathing was erratic, and he whipped around and stormed out of the small house. He stomped down the stairs, went through the back exit and kicked a nearby garbage can as soon as he was outside with an angry yell.
He shoved his fingers through his brunette spikes, lightly gripped and tugged for a second before he let them go, his hands by his sides and his hands clenched tight into fists. This wasn't like him. He knew that. But, perhaps him pushing down that feeling of pure sadness was just too much. If this is me after a day, I won't be me anymore in a week, Sora thought to himself, running his hands through his hair as he took multiple deep breaths to calm himself down.
He paced for a couple minutes before he settled down and sat on the step in front of the back exit. He knew his snapping on the two people he considered family was not the best thing to do, and he knew he'd have to go apologize. Right now, though, he wanted to just sit in the chilling air and breathe, soothe himself until the adrenaline that coursed through him died off and he was left tired.
What Cloud said hit him hard. Roxas losing another family member… Sora would feel so horrible if he let that happen to his little brother. It'd be so unfair on so many levels. To top it all off, Sora had been yelling when he said that, and there was no doubt Roxas heard what he said. He even yelled about his dad… that was a topic Roxas wasn't allowed to hear about anymore. Last time Roxas caught a glimpse of something that even remotely reminded him of his twin, he had a horrible panic attack, and Sora assumed that anything concerning their family would give the same outcome. The boy hyperventilated, his hands were clutching his chest, and he kept trying to say he couldn't see right, and after a short while, he passed out. When he woke up, he sobbed for hours, and there was little to nothing Sora could do to assist his younger brother.
Right now, Roxas did not need a panic attack like that.
Sora shuddered slightly as a cold breeze ruffled through his brown spikes, paper riding the wind like a rollercoaster in the air in front of him. He was hoping that Leon would come to his senses and just give Sora the promotion; everyone knew that hospital bills were rarely cheap, and something like chemotherapy would be on the list of "extremely expensive" for a hospital.
Sora sat on the step, deep in thought as well as coming off the adrenaline rush, for roughly an hour before the door opened behind him. The club was going to open soon, and Jasmine, Belle, and Alice had gone around him to get into the back. Alas, the person stepping out of the door behind Sora wasn't one of the dancers or Naminé coming to get his help, it was Leon. Sora tucked his knees a further bit more into himself, his arms around the appendages loosely. Leon exhaled slowly and put his hand down first as he kicked his legs out in front of him, sitting beside Sora silently.
There were minutes of total quiet that felt like years. Only the sound of the cold wind blowing by could be heard, which brought goose bumps to Sora every now and then, causing the brunette to shudder. Even their breathing was virtually silent. Sora was the first to speak in a whisper, "If you're here to tell me you can't give me the promotion because I'm too young or something, then kindly go back inside and leave me the hell alone."
Leon's head slowly shook, and he crossed his arms. "Look, Sora…" He began, glancing at the younger brunette, "I know I'm not your real dad, and that I can't control you , but I don't want you to have to be your own father like I had to be." Leon explained, his eyes shut for a brief moment before he looked at Sora fully.
Sora's head turned to stare at Leon, curiosity getting the better of him. "And why'd you have to be your own father?" Sora asked when Leon didn't elaborate.
Leon let out a low chuckle. "To put it simply, my father wasn't around at all when I was growing up. But, that was because I was a bastard child," Leon leaned back against the door, "My father raped my mother, and, of course, she never tried to contact him, which makes sense. I heard he's in a prison somewhere, though."
Sora continued to stare at the man beside him, before tentatively speaking up, "So… you were the man of the house since you were little?"
Leon hummed in response, "Had to take care of my mother, but she hated me from the start. Apparently I look a lot like my father. Naturally, that made her hate me," Leon let out a sigh and paused for a minute. The look in his eyes made Sora hurt; the other's light blue eyes were full of pain, and Sora could tell it took a lot just for him to explain this. Sora knew exactly how that felt. "She got into crack when I was about six or so, but I believe you know that already. It made her extremely anxious and paranoid, and since I looked so much like my dad, she saw me as him numerous times as I was growing up, even if I was shorter.
"That's how I got this scar," Leon pointed out, "She was very high one day, and she flipped out on me when I came out of my room. Broke a bottle and slashed my face with the glass. I was… fifteen, I believe. I walked to Cloud's house after I got myself away from her, it was pouring that day, and his mother never let me leave. Very kind lady, even if she wasn't around much. She knew everything about what was wrong with my mom, so I ended up living with Cloud until we went to separate colleges." Leon summarized. By the shortness, Sora was able to tell that Leon explaining this was painful and brought up old wounds. Sora hated that he knew that exact feeling. The same thing happened to him when he explained to Leon and Cloud his and Roxas's past, back at Destiny Islands.
Sora listened to Leon's story with a frown on his face. "That… sounds awful," Sora commented once he was sure Leon was done talking. "I'm really sorry about that… I couldn't imagine having a parent hate me."
Leon let out another sigh and rubbed his forehead. "Well, there's nothing you can do about it sometimes," Leon's eyes were staring at a pebble by the step they were sitting on, and Sora could tell he was doing the same thing Sora tried to do at the hospital; create a distraction for himself.
Sora frowned even more and he put a hand on Leon's shoulder, bringing a smile to his lips to replace the frown, "Don't be upset, alright? It's in the past, and the past means nothing now. You've clearly done very well for yourself, so, in a way, you can thank your mom for being such a crappy mom all those years. Well, don't thank her, but… you know what I mean." Sora tried to explain, but ended up laughing softly in the end.
"But, I can see why you're trying to be a dad to me… As much as I appreciate it, Leon, I am an adult now. I come to you for advice but life decisions like this – they're mine to decide." Sora added and put his hand back on his own knee. "Well, and you since you are the boss, but, still."
Leon nodded and picked the pebble up. "I know that. That's why I'm giving you that promotion, as much as I hate it. You're doing what needs to be done for Roxas's sake, and I can't deny you that right," Leon said and tossed the pebble before he stood.
Sora's eyes widened and he grinned, "Thank you so much… I really needed you to understand this from my perspective." Sora said and got up as well. At least this ensures Roxas getting good treatment, Sora thought.
"I wouldn't be able to stop you from a promotion for long." Leon chuckled softly and pat Sora's hair. "You're too persistent."
Sora grinned and laughed, "I always am, and I'm very persuasive, too," Sora brushed Leon's hand off and stepped back so Leon could open the door.
"Cloud will start teaching you the basics tomorrow and you can join in on the performance tomorrow night, since it's ladies night," Leon explained, "Right now, you should probably help Naminé get set up and go check on Roxas." Leon finished and walked inside.
Sora nodded and followed Leon in, before he parted ways with his boss and went upstairs. Leon hadn't said anything about a panic attack, so that in itself was good news. Or, had no one been to check on Roxas since he went into their room?
That one thought made Sora speed up and fast walk into the small house, then over to their bedroom door. He gave a slight knock before entering, his eyes immediately landing on Roxas. His brain wanted him to say, "Oh, I'm glad you're okay," but, instead, he stood there with his mouth hung slightly open in shock.
Roxas was sitting on their bed, looking at an old, very old, pop-up book Sora had in his drawers. It was a pop-up book he used to read to the twins every night; it was a short children's book about the stars and other worlds, how they were all connected. Roxas and his twin enjoyed it so much, but more so Ventus. When the incident happened, the book had been one of the only things Roxas grabbed before he was hastily torn out of the house by Sora, and ever since, it had been a sort of memento. A memento that usually made Roxas have panic attacks.
But, here he was, sitting on their bed and calmly reading it as if his twin was still beside him to this day. Roxas slowly turned his head up when he heard the door open, locked eyes with Sora for a brief moment, then went back to flipping through the pop-up book. Quietly, oh so quietly, Roxas whispered, "I miss him."
Those three words hurt Sora so much, but he knew it'd hurt Roxas more. Sora took the few steps over to the bed and sat beside Roxas, his arm going around the younger's shoulders to pull the boy into Sora's frame. "I miss him, too," Sora whispered back, rubbing Roxas's upper arm in a comforting gesture. "But, we have each other, right?"
Roxas shrugged lightly, his fingers tracing over one of the stars that went up higher than the others. "Yeah, but, I miss him. Don't you ever wonder what it'd be like if he were here, too?" Roxas asked and turned to the next page. "I mean… things would probably be a lot different. Do you think he would've gotten leukemia?"
Sora let out a soft sigh, his hand moving up Roxas's arm and into his blonde spikes to start combing through them gently. "I don't know, love. I do wonder about it from time to time, but we both know it's better to stay away from those thoughts. So, how about I read you this book like we used to and you get to sleep?" Sora offered, glancing at the book then down at Roxas's face.
"I… yeah… that sounds nice… even if it won't be the same without him." Roxas muttered and handed the book off to Sora, before he wiggled down underneath the covers. Sora smiled at the blonde and continued to run his fingers through his spikes, propping his knees up to hold the book in place as he began to read.
The book took only about three minutes to read, considering Sora read it slowly and more "creatively" in a sense. He read it in a deeper voice for the narration and gave each character a different tone depending on who they were. It was how he used to read it with both of them, and it made them both fall asleep with smiles on their faces. Even now, Sora was able to bring a smile to Roxas's face with his silly voices, and, just like old times, Roxas was asleep by the end of it. Sora wondered if either of the twins ever actually heard the end of the story, since they always seemed to fall asleep before Sora got to that point.
Roxas hadn't brought up what Sora yelled to Leon and Cloud about, so that was good for Sora. At least he hadn't caused a panic attack with bringing up their dad, and Roxas hadn't given himself a panic attack for looking at the pop-up book. Though, he wondered why he was reading it in the first place… That's a question for another time, he thought.
Sora shut the book and set it on the bedside table, his eyes on the boy with a soft expression. He couldn't believe Roxas was able to listen to this story and stay calm, hell, he even remembered Ventus. Not that the other twin would become a topic of conversation just yet, but that showed extreme progress.
"Goodnight, Sunshine," Sora whispered as he leaned down to press his lips gently against Roxas's forehead, "Sweet dreams." He tacked on before slowly and quietly moving out of the bed. He double checked to make sure the blonde was covered by the blankets before he hid the book back in his drawers and silently left the room, shutting the door behind him.
He let out a quiet sigh and leaned back against the door, his eyes shut. Everything that had happened today put a whole new future ahead of Sora and Roxas, even Cloud and Leon since they've become so close to the two brothers. Sora knew that from this point forward, things would be a lot different. Sora would start dancing and getting plenty of "extra" money; although, exposing himself didn't bother him as much as he thought it would. He was nervous, of course, but he didn't mind the fact. He knew he was doing it for Roxas, and that was reason enough to not care about who saw him almost naked.
Tonight would be the last night he could consider his life normal, and that was fine with him. When he left Destiny Islands when he was sixteen with a ten year old Roxas in tow, he knew what he was getting himself into. He wished their parents were still alive to take care of them, but fate chose a different life for the two brothers.
Even with everything they've been through, the extreme mental trauma both of them had and the physical toll that life had given them, Sora couldn't wish for a different life. One without the leukemia would be great, but he could never ask for a life without Leon and Cloud. The two men had become such a huge part of Sora and Roxas's lives that Sora couldn't fathom living anywhere else, or doing a different job. He was grateful for them, even if the majority of the time they were silent.
"Hey, you alright?"
Speak of the devil, Sora thought with a smile as he opened his eyes to come face to face with Cloud, who was looking at him with concern in his steely blue eyes. "Oh, yeah, fine. Just thinking," Sora answered and pushed off the door.
"About?" Cloud asked and took a step back from Sora.
"That I'm happy Roxas and I ended up here, even if it was hell to get here," Sora responded and walked over to the front door and moved down the stairs to the club, Cloud following him.
Cloud chuckled lightly. "Surprisingly, I can agree with you,"
Sora gave a curt nod, then went to help Naminé set up. He was in a strangely "peaceful" mood now, despite the day's events. Yelling at Leon and Cloud before had apparently done some good for him, for it released some pent up stress and the horrible feelings he felt earlier that day.
Sora didn't know what the future held or what to expect in the least, but what he did know was that he was ready to help Roxas through this difficult time no matter what, even if he put his life further on hold then he already had. And he had just started looking for someone to be intimate with…
No matter. Finding his true love could wait, right?
0o0o0o0o0
(And that's another chapter! Yeah, prologue then chapter 1 and still no Riku? Well, fear not, Riku shall be coming very, very soon. So hang on until then, this story has plenty of plot. Don't know when I'll update next but it will be soon!
Also, I did extensive research on the leukemia info. If anyone has any corrections regarding that portion, please, let me know. I don't want it to be wrong in any way.
Reviews are great, and thank you in advance! I loved the great feedback I got on the prologue. I'll update when I can! Expect the next chapter to be quite the… bang. ;) Don't know if it'll be as long as this chapter, however…
[Disregard any grammar mistakes, I am still editing even when it is published])
