AN: Well, I might as well say it now. The chapter before this was the last one you'll see Naruto in for a while. From now on its all Itachi/Hinata bonding time! Yay! ^_^

And in response to a guest review who wants Sasuke to find out about Itachi's newfound feelings and "slight" insanity, I can't tell you whether or not that happens because that would sadly count as a spoiler. Otherwise I would totally tell you and everyone else willing to listen. As it is I'm trying really hard not to reveal too much of my plans for this story before they're written. So trust me, not telling you all hurts me just as much as- if not more than- it hurts you.

Oh, and brief warning about Hidan's language.

Please review!

Conventionally White

Inspired By Masashi Kishimoto's Naruto

In the dark confines of the Akatsuki's latest hideout Itachi stalked, thoughts awhirl as he carelessly navigated the narrow halls of the underground safe house. It had been a month since he had terrorized Naruto, but the occurrence was still fresh in his memory and by far one of the fondest recollections he had. The fondest, of course, were of Hinata.

The graceful way she moves… the glossiness of her long, silky navy blue hair… the absolutely mesmerizing quality of her pale lavender eyes… her breathtakingly beautiful features… she is a true goddess in every aspect.

The Uchiha barely contained the shiver that threatened to race up his spine at the images of her that flashed through his mind. He knew he was wrapped around her finger and she barely even knew him. His coal-black eyes lost their dazed look long enough for him to veer himself from the path of what would have been a certain collision with the latest corner he had begun to turn before he slipped peacefully back into his busy mind.

Had Itachi not been so involved in his thoughts then perhaps he would have noticed the other three Akatsuki members who had just witnessed his actions. The largest one of them, a blue-skinned male with sharp teeth who knew him the best, shuddered.

He hissed under his breath, "Did you see that? He almost ran into a wall! He's never had such a close call in all the years I've known him, not even in the heat of battle with weapons coming at him from every direction!"

"I know," rumbled his orange-haired leader, sharing a look with the blue-haired woman standing next to him. He narrowed his odd purple eyes, "Konan… send for the rest of the Akatsuki. It is time we did something about this."

~oOo~

Slipping silently through the thick expanse of trees the dark-haired Akatsuki member pondered what had happened. Pein had come up to him and ordered him to go on a mission involving the theft of something valuable and the assassination of a lesser lord. It wouldn't have been so odd if not for the fact that his leader had stared strangely at him as he had left, as if he were plotting something.

That alone had accounted for Itachi's hasty completion of the mission and the equally hasty retreat back to the compound. As he approached the seemingly inconspicuous building, dodging the various traps surrounding it without triggering a single one, he realized he could hear many voices and the impatient shuffling of feet coming from within.

Multiple scenarios ran through his head, each one containing a betrayal, a discovery of his true mission, or a surprise attack from an enemy party. Soundlessly the Uchiha drew a kunai from his pouch and moved closer stealthily. He slid his hand around the doorknob to the only door into the compound and opened it, slowly sliding it far enough away from the doorway so he could enter.

Effortlessly he crossed the opening hall of the ground floor of the compound and went to the next door. Just as quietly as last time he opened this door to peer through it as well, almost dropping the kunai he was holding at the sight that greeted him. Inside was almost every single one of the remaining Akatsuki members- Kakuzu being excluded- spread out across the room on various chairs and couches that hadn't been there before.

He gave another glance over the room, his eyes now a swirl of red and black with his activated Sharingan. They roamed searchingly over everyone, only stopping upon reaching Tobi, sprawled across the floor with his legs giddily kicking next to a large, long piece of paper. In his hand he held a big paint brush dipped in red paint, its bucket only about a foot away, as he hummed cheerfully.

Itachi narrowed his eyes as he read what was already painted on the piece of paper. In large, capital red letters the masked male had written "CONVENTI". Even as he watched Tobi begin to paint an "O" onto the paper next to the "I" the Uchiha knew what it would say when it was finished. It could only be one, simple word.

Convention.

Itachi recoiled from the door as if it had burned him, allowing it to swing open and announce his presence. Every head turned in his direction, the room going deathly silent. For a moment nobody could speak, and then Tobi whined in disappointment.

"Aw! You came back too early! I wasn't even able to finish the sign yet!"

Deidera grumbled and rolled his eyes, "Well, what did you expect? It's Itachi you're talking about! He completes missions that're supposed to take three days and finishes them in three hours! Besides," the blonde crossed his arms and scowled, "that stupid sign is pointless. Not artistic at all!"

"That's hardly-" the white half of Zetsu started before the black half finished "-relevant."

"How could it be anything but relevant?" Deidera scoffed, "Art is amazing! Art is life! Art is what makes this pathetic world exist!"

A single eyebrow jutted up on the silver-haired Hidan who lay on his back, spread across one of the couches with his head resting in his hands, "What a load of bull-"

"All of you be silent and take a seat," Pein finally snapped from his own exquisitely carved chair on the opposite side of the room, with another, smaller one next to him where Konan was quietly sitting. A moment passed as everyone who had been standing moved to a place to sit, leaving Itachi the only one standing uncomprehendingly by the door. Pein motioned with a hand towards the last remaining chair directly across from him, "You as well, Itachi."

The Uchiha, not knowing what else to do, simply did as he was told.

As soon as he was seated Pein locked his fingers together and leaned forward in his seat, "Itachi. We are here today to talk about a very serious problem. You've been… distracted… recently and we have become concerned about whether you'll be able to effectively do your job now." He narrowed his eyes at the dark-haired Akatsuki member, "Due to this disquieting behavior I have been forced to call a meeting of all the Akatsuki members."

There was a pause as Itachi's Sharingan eyes scanned the group once more before he calmly spoke, "I believe you have forgotten Kakuzu."

"Nah," Hidan grumbled from his comfortable position lounging on the couch, "The bastard said some crap about "If I'm not being paid then I'm not doing psychiatric services"." The Uchiha raised a stark eyebrow at the comment and Hidan continued, "I'm starting to agree with the jackass."

Pein ignored him, pointedly continuing, "By now we know what has caused your disturbing actions, though we didn't believe it at first."

Itachi stiffened minutely in his seat, not quite sure what to expect. What conclusion have they come to? They can't know about Hinata. I would have noticed.

"We have known for about a month now that the reason behind your change in attitude is because…" he paused, as if he couldn't quit bring himself to continue, "you're pining over a woman."

For a moment Itachi paled, horrified at the amount of danger he had just placed Hinata in. He was unable to think any more on it, however, because of a certain loud, obnoxious male.

"Pining? Ha!" Hidan snorted, "He's like a poor, starved puppy out to hump her leg! Its freaking creepy!"

"Hidan," Pein said warningly.

As if their leader hadn't spoken white Zetsu added, "And she was hardly a woman. She was only a teenager."

"But what a tasty-looking morsel she was," black Zetsu licked his lips at the thought.

Itachi sent him a cold glare while he tried to ignore the panic beginning to prickle up his spine.

Their orange-haired leader started speaking again, albeit edgily, "As leader of the Akatsuki I have decided that something has to be done about this, and after some consultation with the rest of organization we have come to the conclusion that counseling was the best option." He paused before adding firmly, "While you may be having some… problems… at the moment you are also a valued part of the Akatsuki and would therefore be difficult to replace."

The Uchiha accepted that as the closest Pein would ever come to saying he cared even slightly about the lives of the people who followed him in the Akatsuki. He also relaxed ever so slightly at the realization that they didn't plan to do anything to Hinata.

The organization leader continued, "Before we go any further it should be known that the rest of the Akatsuki have some things to say-"

"Yeah, I have something to say alright!" Hidan interrupted, sitting up and pointing an accusing finger at Itachi, "I didn't believe our stupid leader when he said you were facing lady problems, so then he made me follow you on one of your damn "dates" with the girl! I was scarred for the rest of my immortal life from what I saw, you freaky stalker!"

"Konan, if you would." At Pein's words Konan withdrew a dull knife from her cloak and threw it at the immortal hard enough to get it lodged in his chest.

After a string of cusses the silver-haired male removed the dull blade and huffed sulkily, "What the hell do you want me to do with this?"

Pein narrowed his eyes and ground out through teeth that were clenched in annoyance, "Go into the next room and get creative."

Hidan perked up at that and hopped from the couch before cheerfully exiting the room.

Their leader cleared his throat and began talking once more, "As I was saying, some of the Akatsuki have some things to say on the matter." He turned to the large blue form of Kisame Hoshigaki and inclined his head expectedly, "Well, Kisame? Do you have something to say to your partner? You were the first to notice his strange behavior, after all."

"Nah," he shook his head, staring intensely at Itachi, "I… don't know what to say."

"Very well." He glanced towards the next Akatsuki member, who remained still on the plush chair he was sitting in, "Zetsu?"

The white half began, "What you've been doing is wrong. You've been watching a girl on our enemy's side and-"

"Wait, wait, wait," his black half interrupted, "How is that any different from what we do? We follow people who work against us as well, do we not?"

White Zetsu frowned, "We do it because it is our job. He does it due to infatuation."

"Well I don't think it's that wrong," came his almost petulant reply.

"I agree with you, Zetsu," Deidera's sudden input made everyone swing their attention to him, though Zetsu stared at him blankly and waited for specification, "Er, black Zetsu."

Looks of disbelief followed the statement, "Really?"

The blonde sighed impatiently, "We all saw the girl when we followed Itachi and- let's face it- she was a total babe!" There was a small round of nods as well as a shouted "Hell yeah!" from Hidan in the next room, though nobody knew if he was agreeing with Deidera or was just pleased with whatever he was doing in there. He continued, "So nobody can blame him for liking her when she has a body like that. And as for following her, how the hell else is he supposed to get close to her? He can't exactly ask her out. In the end this is probably the healthiest relationship that any of us can have in this organization." Deidera paused before adding as an afterthought, "Not that I'm on your side, Itachi. I still hate you and look forward to the day you die at my hand."

Pein sighed and rubbed his temple, "I thought we agreed to persuade him to stop following her."

He shrugged carelessly in reply, "Just thought I'd show the other side of the argument."

The leader of the Akatsuki exhaled in mild agitation and turned to Tobi, the only person left to speak. For a moment everyone just stared at Tobi as he wriggled in his seat with his hand raised excitedly, the words "Pick me, pick me, pick me" emanating from him like a chant.

With the raise of an eyebrow Pein spoke, "You wish to speak, Tobi?"

The masked male nodded excitedly several times and pulled a scroll out from his cloak, hastily unraveling it until it stretched to the floor, "Itachi, I only want you to know that anything I say is for your own good and I'll only say it because we all care about you."

Itachi never once doubted that Tobi was evil, but it was at that exact moment that he realized he was even worse than he had originally thought.

Before anyone could stop him Tobi started a long, emotional speech, complete with blubbering, sniffling, and the occasional wail. The reactions of everyone varied, with some remaining quiet to wallow privately in their misery at listening to the speech (Itachi, Pein, Konan, and Zetsu), others muttering under their breath in annoyance (Kisame and Deidera), and others still doing nothing but banging their head against a wall and cursing loudly from the next room over (Hidan).

Tobi gave an especially loud dramatic sniffle, "A… and it just wasn't like you! I just w… want the old Itachi back!"

He paused to take another breath for the next part of the speech, but the dark-haired Uchiha had finally decided that he had heard enough.

"No more of this," Itachi spoke stiffly, "There is no need for counseling and no need for everyone to share their feelings on the matter. I have control over my own actions."

He frowned coldly, red and black eyes spinning restlessly as he glanced over the people gathered. He then spoke the words that one should never speak if they're trying to convince someone of their case. He spoke the words of an addict.

"And I can stop whenever I wish to."

Leaving no room for arguments he spun on his heel and left the room, firm in his resolve.

For minutes everything was silent (With the exception of Hidan suddenly bursting into psychotic laughter in the next room over, though nobody really wanted to think about that) before Pein finally whispered, "We must fix this. We must."

AN: Am I the only one who finds the idea of the Akatsuki- a group of highly messed up criminals- having a convention completely hilarious?

And sorry for any mistakes. I was half-asleep in both the writing and correcting of this chapter, so there's bound to be a few.