Disclaimer: I don't own Psych or Final Fantasy or anything else or any of its related characters. This is just for my own enjoyment and the potential enjoyment of other Psych-Os like me, and no monetary gain was expected or received.
Rating: T+
Spoilers: Not much, but possible through series finale, though Marlowe doesn't exist. Trout also doesn't exist.
A/N: Sorry, should have way more chapters than this to post, if not for this story then for all my stories, but I haven't been sleeping even as little as I usually do so I haven't had the energy to write when I get off work.
Chapter Two: How the Hell This Happened
"Now that we're all back together and not, you know, running for our lives," Henry said, "I think maybe we should discuss just how the hell we ended up in this position? It all kinda happened so suddenly I'm not sure I trust my memory."
"Toto, I don't think we're in California anymore," Shawn said.
"According to…erm…Bahamut…we fell through a rip in the 'veil' between our world and this one," Lassiter said, rather sourly, as though the words tasted bad. "He didn't tell me exactly how that happened, but he did say that the hole had mended itself, so there's no going back the way we came."
"A rip in the veil between worlds?" Juliet said, wonderingly. "I remember seeing…what looked like an aurora. Right there in the middle of Los Padres. I suppose…that was the rip?"
Lassiter shrugged. "Seems likely to me. If anything about this crazy situation seems likely."
Lassiter and O'Hara had been off-duty. Shawn and Gus had insisted they come along to Los Padres - meaning that they would drive, since there was no way Lassiter was going to voluntarily shove himself into the back seat of a blueberry - on what Lassiter insisted on calling a snipe hunt. He agreed to come along only because Shawn persuaded him that they would stop and pay a visit to Big Ed Dixon, who managed to survive the axe in the back and returned to his cabin in the woods once he'd healed. Henry decided to come along at the last minute for the fresh air and exercise.
What Shawn and Gus were looking for, there in the woods, was signs of alien visitation. Apparently quite a few reports of strange lights and sightings had come in from hikers and tourists and what-have-you, and they were absolutely certain they would be able to find evidence. Now it looked like they had, but of something else entirely, and perhaps even more unbelievable than little green men from outer space.
Lassiter stood up and started to pace. "So," he said, hands behind his back. "We're here in…wherever the hell this is. The city of Rabanastre in the nation of who-the-hell-knows in the world of ohmygodthiscan'tbehappening. Back home, they will, eventually, find the Crown Vic abandoned by the side of the road where we left it and they will begin a search for us, and we will never be found. Just five more for the 'missing persons' file. Vick will be pissed to lose two of her best detectives as well as her favorite fake psychic duo and her former consultant liaison. Obviously we have to find some way to get back, if there is some way to get back…but the question is, how?"
No one seemed to have any answer to that question. After a long, quiet moment, Juliet said, looking down at the hands she had folded in her lap, "I think we need to accept that, for the time being at least, we're… kind of…stuck here."
Lassiter sighed and sat down again. "I hate to agree with that assessment, but…I don't really see another choice."
"I think…we…need to find out about this place," Juliet said. "And…I guess…we…need to find work. Not to mention some place to live. Lord only knows how long we'll be stuck here. Maybe…maybe forever."
"The first thing we need to do is get ourselves into the city, and to do that I guess we need to pay for warrants of citizenship," Lassiter said. "Which probably means paying a bribe to get past the bailey here and into the city proper to reach the Consulate General's office where warrants are purchased."
"Warrants of citizenship are pretty dear," Juliet said, "and the bribe to get into the city doesn't sound all that cheap, either. How can we afford it? I think we'll have to catch the attention of the labor scouts somehow."
"Don't worry about money. According to…erm…Bahamut…" he said, the name rolling off his tongue sourly again, "I have plenty to get us into the city. We probably don't even have to worry about getting jobs right away: we can just focus on finding out about this place and hopefully how we can get the hell out of here."
"Where did you get all this money and food?" Juliet asked. "Moreover, how the hell are you carrying it?"
"I don't know," he said. "The food comes from…this…ah, hell. This cornucopia thing. I expect it's magic because it never runs empty. The money comes from the horde of a dead dragon. There was…literally tons of it. According to…ahem…Bahamut…he brought it all along somehow. I don't know about that, but I do know that I'm somehow carrying a whole hell of a lot of it right here in this pack, which incredibly is not at all heavy despite the fact that the Horn of Plenty itself weighs a good twenty pounds even before you pull food out of it. I don't understand it, but I guess I just have to write it off as one more freaky-ass thing about this freaky-ass world we've fetched up in."
Shawn slapped Gus on the shoulder. "Dude, this is so cool. This is like waking up in a video game. One of those Japanese fantasy-RPGs."
"Yes, very droll," Henry said, with narrowed eyes. "Shawn, I think for once in your life maybe this is the time to take something kind of seriously, don't you? That dinosaur could've killed us all, and I doubt it's the only one of its kind in this world, or maybe even the most dangerous thing running around. Lassiter here says there are dragons out there somewhere. Yeah, here in the city we're maybe sorta safe, but only sorta. Like I said before, there's been some kind of war around here recently, and there's no guarantee peace has fully settled. From what I've gathered, this place was conquered, and the victorious army has been coming down kinda hard on the people."
Henry stood up and gestured to the refugees around them. "Look at these folks, Shawn. They're exhausted, they're starving…they've got nothing left. That could just as easily be us. It would've been us if Lassiter hadn't come back to us with food. This is not a game, Shawn. This is real life, no matter how much like a fantasy it may seem. We're in this for survival. Don't forget that."
Henry sat back down next to Lassiter. "You seem to accepted this crazy situation fairly easily," Lassiter muttered to him.
"I kinda don't really have a choice. I'm fairly certain I haven't lost my mind. Fairly."
