AUTHOR'S NOTE

Christ. Did I really do this?

We're not getting anywhere are we?

Let's just keep it going. We'll see where we end up.

Joyful Tree Friends

He was rolling the little pill around between his fingers. He felt bile in his throat. He wasn't sure if he was disgusted with himself, or if he was physically ill. His muscles twitched when he looked at it, so it might've been the latter. It didn't really matter though. Lumpy didn't really care how much he hated himself when the high ended. When his tongue swelled and his mouth watered, when his body ached and his eyes throbbed, when he knew he couldn't take it anymore; he'd pop another pill.

They tasted horrible. He had to swallow them whole, the whole grape-sized pill. They smelled like buttercups.

It was on his tongue. He was ready to finally let it go sliding down his throat.

He almost didn't hear the crying.

The pill, a perfectly round little marble, nearly fell from his finger tips when he heard it. He didn't let it fall of course, he tucked it into his pocket, but still it nearly slipped his grasp.

The crying was just beyond the rock ridge, where he had always gone to sit and fight a fruitless battle against a little piece of sweet relief. He couldn't ignore it if he tried. It was so close that every rock he looked behind felt like it could've been the source of it. And then, just when he was ready to count it all off as a side effect of his withdrawl and lip the pill down his throat, he saw her.

She was wailing. The blanket she was wrapped in seemed warm, but the evening winds meant that nothing outside of a hut and a fire could really be warm, so to Lumpy it clearly meant she was half frozen. He scooped the bundle up and rocked the child back and forth.

"There there... C'mon now."

Lumpy whispered to the child. He ran a hand across her white furred face. She stopped crying. She looked at him just like he looked at her.

"Yeah, that's it, buddy. You're gonna be okay."

He rocked her a bit. She smiled at him. He tossed her in the air. She laughed. He tossed her once more and she slipped out of his hands, landed on the hard rock floor. She was silent. He gasped.

The little bundle had forgiven him, of course. He wasn't sure if it was benevolent or just too stupid, but the child had forgiven him easily. He carried her back to camp with the sun on his shoulders. Sniffles had already started a fire. Cuddles had grabbed some food.

"Hey." Cuddles said, "Lumpy, what've you got? Meat? Look I already-"

"It's a baby." Lumpy said plainly.

Sniffles adjusted his glasses, "Holy shit."

"Is... Is it a girl?" Cuddles asked.

Lumpy felt his body tense up, "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

Cuddles held a hand up in halfhearted defense,

"J-jeez Lumpy. I was just wondering. I mean if it was a girl then... Well you know."

Lumpy held the bundle in one arm. With a finger, he pulled down the cloth that covered her otherwise naked body.

"...It is a girl."

There was silence. The fire itself seemed to hush its crackling. The silence held for what felt like an hour, until Cuddles had cleared the wad in his throat and managed to say,

"We should..." He was still unsure, "We should bring her to Giggles. She'd be-"

"Shut the fuck up." Lumpy said. He started walking towards their hut, "You know we can't do that. She's only safe with us."

Sniffles, who had tried to tend the fire to keep his mind off of this, finally spoke up, "Y-yeah. Lumpy's right. I don't like Giggles. We should... just keep her safe for now."

Cuddles had more to say. He didn't say it.

Lumpy nodded towards the both of them, "So we're agreed? We keep her safe. You know what she means, so.

"Be ready to die."